Why parenting advice won't help you stop snapping at your kids

Send us Fan MailWhy do so many parents feel like they don't have time to take care of themselves?The answer isn't as simple as being busy.This week, we're reflecting on a passage from the book How to Love by Thich Nhat Hanh and exploring why our own needs slowly disappear after becoming parents. I'll also share a simple reflection exercise that helped me reconnect with the things that brought me joy before having children—and why gratitude may be more powerful than we think.In this episode, we reflect on:What brought me joy before I had children?How can I bring a small part of that back into my life?What moments of joy have I been overlooking?Sometimes the goal isn't finding more time.It's learning to notice what already helps us feel more like ourselves.Don't forget to join our NEW BOOK CLUB!https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/This week's resources:This month's book: How to Love Article: The impact of gratitude on depression and anxiety: the mediating role of criticizing, attacking, and reassuring the selfArticle: The efficacy of seven gratitude interventions for promoting subjective well-beingRelated podcast episodes you might have missed:https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-podcast/id1440533170?i=1000771848174https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-podcast/id1440533170?i=1000720552759Watch this episode on YouTube:https://youtu.be/npYxwq3MT0QSupport the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailWhen we hear the word radicalization, we often think, "That could never happen to my family." But what if radicalization begins with something much more human—a need to belong, to feel understood, or to make sense of emotional pain?In this episode, I sit down with men's coach and former counterterrorism professional James Stamatelos to explore why some young people become vulnerable to extremist ideas, how social media can amplify that vulnerability, and what parents can do to build stronger protective relationships with their children.In this episode, we discuss:What radicalization really is.Why belonging and emotional pain matter.How social media can influence young people.Why curiosity is often more powerful than confrontation.How connection can help protect our children.Reflection Question:If my child encountered harmful ideas online, would they feel safe enough to talk to me about them?Book James mentioned:  How Minds Change: The Surprising Science of Belief, Opinion, and Persuasion (Amazon Canada)Resources:Violence Prevention NetworkDiverting HateLife After HateConnect with James or learn more from him:James J. Stamatelos is a professional coach and Certified Level 3 Internal Family Systems (IFS) practitioner who specializes in helping men overcome what he calls “anxious insecurity”—the persistent feeling of being chronically “not enough” despite external success.Before transitioning into coaching, James worked in high-pressure environments as an intelligence analyst for the Region 13 Counter-Terrorism Task Force Fusion Center and as a specialist for the City of Pittsburgh Office of Emergency Management & Homeland Security. His background gives him a unique perspective on stress, identity, and psychological resilience.The Radicalization of Men (The Psychology of Feeling ‘Not Enough’) on the EZ Conversations PodcastBook a coaching with JamesSupport the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailHow do you allow yourself to feel, experience and move past unpleasant emotions? In this episode, I share how unpleasant emotions like worry, sadness, or even boredom can lead to some behaviours we might want to be more aware of. If you notice that you often get stuck in unpleasant emotions or that your anger or frustration leads to harder moments with loved ones, then this episode is for you. Here are today's 3 reflections: Can I let myself feel an uncomfortable emotion without trying to fix it right away?What happens in my thoughts, feelings, and behavior when I’m feeling something unpleasant?Can I notice the good moments that may be happening alongside difficult emotions?Hope you are liking this new version of the podcast! You can email me [email protected] to let me know. In August, I will start focusing on a book of the month. Follow along on our private Facebook page or visit our website below!Support the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailThis was a hard episode for me to record but I needed to honour my grandmother who passed away yesterday. Today's reflections are: Does my child feel loved and respected by me?Does my child feel like they belong?Do I help my child build their confidence by letting them fail or giving them opportunities to prove to themselves that they can do it I hope you enjoy this episode and that it helps you reflect on how you are showing up for your child in every day actions. This was a reminder for me as well! (no one is perfect!)Support the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailThis week, we are reflecting on our self-love.This week's reflections are:How do I nourish my happiness?Do I see my body and mind as my home?How do you feed your mind and body?As parents I think we need to remember to pause, reflect, and reconnect with what truly nourishes us. This reminds us that we matter and that we do love ourselves. These reflections are inspired by the book How to Love. I hope this week's episode can help you be more intentional with what you consume so you can show up with more calm and connection in your daily lives.Book: How to love by Thich Nhat Hanh (Amazon.com)My conversation with Dr.Kristen Neff:https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000652462526Support the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailI'm Back! After five months away from the microphone, I'm finally back.If you've been wondering where I've been, thank you for checking in. Your emails, messages, and support meant more to me than you know.I explain what happened in this episode and share how this time away also gave me space to reflect.In also share what I've been learning about capacity the idea that our ability to cope, connect, parent, and respond changes throughout the day based on what's happening around us and within us.We often tell ourselves that we don't have time for self-care.But what if the real question isn't about self-care at all?What if it's about learning to notice and respond to our needs?In this episode, we explore:Why "I don't have time for self-care" may be the wrong questionWhat Capacity Mountain taught me about stress and emotional well-beingThe three categories of needs that most parents overlook: Body, Mind, and ConnectionHow small intentional pauses can help you show up differently for your childWhy many of us have forgotten what our needs even areA simple way to start noticing what is draining—and replenishing—your capacityThis episode marks a new chapter for the podcast and for Curious Neuron.Whether you've been here since the beginning or you're joining for the first time, I'm grateful you're here.Let's reconnect, reflect, and continue this journey together.Support the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailFamily dynamics can feel especially intense around the holidays and one of the most challenging patterns many parents face is the triangle between you, your partner, and your mother-in-law. In today’s episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish returns to the podcast to help us make sense of this dynamic with compassion, clarity, and evidence-based tools.In this conversation, I sit down with Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, psychologist and author of You, Your Husband & His Mother, to unpack why the mother-in-law / daughter-in-law dynamic is so emotionally charged and how it quietly strains couples.We talk about boundaries, guilt, generational differences, cultural expectations, and what couples can do to stop feeling divided and start acting as a solid team.In this episode, we cover:Why this family dynamic is uniquely triggeringHow boundaries get misunderstood and what actually worksWhat to do when your partner shuts down or minimizes the issueHow to recover after a difficult family gatheringWhy connection comes before problem-solvingJoin me for a free Webinar on December 17th at 8pm (and get the replay!):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/ce962dd904You can purchase Tracy's book, You, Your Husband and Your Mother in Law, in the US or in Canada. You can also get her first book (which I also highly recommend called "I didn't Sign up for This" in the US or Canada. Listen to my previous conversation with Tracy below:https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000627417247Support the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailIf you’ve ever ended a night thinking, “Why did I snap again?” — this episode is for you.Today, we’re diving into what’s really happening in your brain and body when your child pushes your buttons. Because those intense reactions? They aren’t proof that you’re a bad parent. They’re signals from a nervous system in overdrive — and once you can recognize those signals, you can change the way you respond.We’ll talk about:Why your child’s emotions can feel like a threat to your brainThe science behind emotional flooding (in both you and your child)How stress, exhaustion, and self-expectations reduce your window of toleranceWhat “repair” looks like — and why it matters more than getting it perfectYou’ll walk away with practical reflection questions and simple shifts that help you move from snapping to connecting — even on the hard days.Join next week's FREE webinar (or get the replay):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/ce962dd904Read the full article: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24392687/Share your thoughts and questions with me:https://form.typeform.com/to/Dadaa8nsRead a blog post about this:https://curiousneuron.com/2025/12/03/why-you-still-snap-even-when-youve-done-the-work/Support the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailHi Reflective Parents! This week, we are talking about something I keep hearing from parents which is snapping at our kids even when we are working on ourselves by learning about parenting or even going to therapy. You are not failing your child. You are still learning many skills that lead to you becoming more aware of your own state before you snap.In this episode, I walk you through 3 steps that might help you catch yourself the next time you snap (notice I didn't say BEFORE you snap....that isn't always realistic). I would love to find a way to communicate better with all of you. Share your story that is related to this episode in the link below OR ask a question to help me create a future podcast episode. https://form.typeform.com/to/Dadaa8nsSupport the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization. 

Send us Fan MailIf you keep snapping, shutting down, or feeling guilty, even though you “know” what to do... this episode will finally make it make sense.After speaking with more than 200 parents, I’ve noticed the same pattern:We are drowning in parenting advice, but no one is teaching parents the one skill that actually changes everything, how your nervous system works.In this episode, I talk about:Why you still lose patience even after therapy, courses, and all the scriptsWhat’s really happening in your body during those moments you “flip”Why you’re not a bad parent — you’re simply depletedHow viewing your child through a leadership lens instantly changes your reactionsThe real first step to building a calmer, more connected homeYou don’t need more advice.You need emotional bandwidth — and today, we talk about how to build it.New! Becoming a Reflective Parent course is now available!!!Learn the 10 skills that help you rewire patterns, regulate emotions, and understand your nervous system. Get it today!https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Support the showMore ways to become a Reflective Parent with Curious Neuron:Join our NEW book club for only $9.99!https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-podcast-book-clubLearn about the next books we will be covering:https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video):https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4iEbFRZ5QQ&t=12sGrab our course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Join the next 6-8 week cohort for parents, kids or teens:https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/Or email me [email protected] to book emotional training sessions for your organization.