298. Fear, grief and unconditional love

This week’s episode explores subconscious beliefs and how to empty the reservoir of the unconscious mind. Using self inquiry, we’re continuing last week’s exploration of the mind’s tendency to divide things under the labels of ‘me’ and ‘not me.’ How do we live when our life experience is ruled by those concepts? What if what we’ve been believing ourselves to be is nothing but a fictitious character? And who might we be if we opened our minds enough to experience ourselves without these stories? Could it be that who we are is much broader, much more expensive, than we’ve allowed ourselves to imagine?

This week’s episode is the 300th episode of Love Is The Power! So we thought we’d tackle a big question: What is real? At Tom’s invitation, we are looking at our own direct experience in this moment to see if we can actually find a border between ourselves and anything – or anyone – else. The tendency to refer to things outside the body as “Not me” is a long, long habit of humanity. But what if it’s true that separation is just a belief? What if it’s not a fact of life? And what amazing avenues of existing might we discover beyond this illusory thought?

This week Tom invites participants to share some of their favourite stories to tell that make them miserable. One share uncovers the thought “I could lose something” which becomes a group popcorn-style inquiry. If you know what it’s like to live from the fear of losing something, or out of fear in general, this contemplation is for you. How do you react when you believe you could lose something vital (like your job, house, partner, child, parent, health)? Does the thought bring peace or stress into your life? Who might you be without it?

In this week’s episode of Love Is the Power, Tom invites participants to contemplate this question: Is it true that what you’re living right now – whatever it is, exactly as it is – is not the best thing for you? Can you absolutely know that? This profound group inquiry delves deeply into the question, all the way to the worst imaginable realities one might live. One of these situations is one Tom lived through himself, and he elaborates on how it ended up being the best thing for him and his family to experience. Could it be that the things we’re most afraid of are nothing but portals into an unconditionally loving existence?

Byron Katie says there’s nothing so dark that we cannot put it on paper, question it, and set ourselves free. She also says that we live in a friendly Universe. Those two statements are really put to the test in this week’s episode of Love Is The Power, where a participant brings up the trauma of getting news that two of her community members had been murdered. This is intense, heavy inner work to take on, which is why it’s so beautiful to be able to share it together. We invite you to find that inner sense of devastation at the cruel ways humanity can treat each other, and follow along with this profound and brave inquiry.

This week’s episode begins with an invitation from Tom to pick something in your life you don’t like, and to see if you can notice what story you’re living by experiencing it. For example, if you’re experiencing a difficult work situation or financial hardship or a frustrating relationship. The underlying story you’re living might be “I’m a disappointment,” or “Nobody cares about me,” or something entirely different — but equally painful — that is expressing itself through the situations in your life. What if self-inquiry and self-liberation aren’t serious? What if it could just be playful and light? What might you notice about the experiences in your life that are less than enjoyable? Join the meditation group to notice for yourself.

Last week we looked at the belief in the seriousness of life, especially related to being a parent. Parenting is one of the big things that we can tend to use as proof of the serious nature of everything. But that inquiry revealed the truth of what the belief was creating in the parent’s life: stress, both for herself and her kids. What about other situations, though, the mind wants to know. Surely some things really are serious? What about when a friend shares news of their cancer diagnosis with you? What if you receive a diagnosis of something yourself? We think we’re protecting ourselves from everything we don’t want to experience when we hold tightly to the story of seriousness, but it might be that what we’re giving ourselves is an existence based purely on survival – not really living. If you’re ready to question this story and live a life without fear, follow along in this group-inquiry episode that asks: Is life actually serious?

If you’ve been listening to Love Is The Power for awhile, you know that one of host Tom Compton’s favourite concepts to bring up for inquiry is “It’s serious.” After all, it’s maybe the most deeply held belief on Planet Earth, this idea that life is serious. This week, Tom facilitates a parent on this story. She experiences stress and anxiety when she believes that being a parent is serious and, through this self-inquiry, notices how it causes her to actually show up with her kids. If there’s an area of life where you notice a sense of seriousness, follow along with this meditation or just listen to a fellow human questioning their own stressful belief. We do get by with a little help from our friends.

This week’s episode begins in a conversation around the idea of pleasure. What the group notices is that the experience of pleasure can be purely joyful, but that when we become attached to good feelings, we (ironically) suffer. Another thing the inquiry group notices is this idea that pleasure is somehow wrong. This leads to a deepening of the contemplation and a popcorn-style inquiry on the deeply-ingrained beliefs we have about the polarities of right and wrong, good and bad, and acceptable and unacceptable. Enjoy this conversation that leaves everything out in the open, or as Tom might put it: coming up into the light to be released.

This week Tom offers this prompt: imagine that you have just arrived in the body you’re in, with exactly the same memories and name attached to it. What is it like imagining that none of the memories, images, or identities associated with this body-mind actually have any relevance to who you are? This little thought experiment leads to a profound group dialogue inquiring into our real nature. According to Tom, our nature is freedom. But it sure doesn’t feel like that sometimes…especially when we live out the conditioning we receive as children that life is serious and you can get it wrong. If you’ve gotten that message and responded by either becoming extremely obedient or rebelling (which isn’t freedom either), and are interested in a truer experience of who you are, this episode is for you!