Shedding the Corporate Bitch podkast

Leadership Blind Spots: Why Your Best People Keep Quitting

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29:31
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About This Episode

Most leaders assume their team's friction is a personality clash. 

Executive and business coach Debbie Longo says it's almost always behavior, and the leadership blind spot she runs into most is control and manipulation. 

In this episode, Debbie walks through how a single thought becomes a behavior, why some leaders need to hit a “bottom” before they'll change, and why real, lasting change starts with seeing the pattern in yourself before anyone else has to point it out.  

Bernadette and Debbie also get into the tension every HR leader and manager feels: real behavior change can happen fast, but it doesn't happen on command,  and pushing for speed without patience is often what derails it.

What You Will Learn

•       Rebuild trust with your team by recognizing the one behavior pattern most executives never catch in themselves

•       Stop the control-and-manipulation cycle before it tanks sales and drives out your best people

•       Use a 2-minute nightly inventory to catch blind spots before they cost you your job

•       Turn pressure from your board or boss into a fast, focused action plan instead of denial

•       Understand why real behavior change can show up in weeks, and what determines the pace

•       Protect your influence and credibility by leading from awareness instead of ego

•       Give HR and managers a clear, patient way to talk about the pace of real change


Key Quote

“I changed my thinking, and everyone around me changed.” — Debbie Longo


Episode Chapters

00:01 – Why behavior, not personality, drives leadership effectiveness

00:04 – The mindset-shift example: catching a bad outcome before it happens

00:07 – What hitting bottom actually looks like (divorce, job loss, losing a house)

00:08 – Why HR and managers underestimate how long real change takes

00:10 – The message to HR leaders and hiring managers: patience over pace

00:14 – How control and manipulation actually develops 

00:16 – Why controlling leaders can't see it in themselves

00:20 – "I change myself... everybody around me changes" — the ripple effect

00:20 – Where accountability fits in (board/boss pressure forcing change)

00:22 – How Debbie tells a client they're not actually changing

00:24 – The #1 tip: the nightly self-inventory exercise

00:26 – Wrap-up and where to find Debbie


About the Guest

Debbie Longo is an Executive Behavioral Coach, speaker, and podcast host with more than 24 years of experience helping leaders improve communication, accountability, and performance by changing behaviors that drive results. She equips executives and business owners with practical strategies that strengthen leadership, culture, and long-term business success.

About the Host

Bernadette Boas is a corporate executive leadership coach, speaker, and founder of Ball of Fire Coaching.

Related Episodes

The Accidental Leader: Manager vs. Leader 

Your Team is Being Under-Directed!!

5 Steps to Move From Top Performer to True Leader


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