Most Leaders Aren't Coachable - Here's Why!

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!Feeling unfulfilled at work, even after the promotion, the raise, and the seat at the table? This episode shows you why the feeling you were promised never shows up, and how to get it back without quitting your job or blowing up your life.Most high achievers have been climbing since their first internship. Each rung promises that this is where you’ll finally feel accomplished. You get there, you wait, and nothing comes. So you aim for the next rung and quietly wonder if something is wrong with you. Bernadette Boas sits down with leadership and executive coach Michelle Pollack, who was laid off at eight months pregnant in the 2008 recession and spent the years after learning what the ladder never told her. The ladder tells you what to do to get ahead. It never tells you who to be while you’re doing it. On the way up, many of us drop pieces of ourselves one rung at a time, until we sound like the boss we swore we’d never become.We're discussing:Why the next promotion won’t fix the empty feeling on its own.How high achievers abandon themselves rung by rung, and how to spot where you’ve done it.The one question Michelle asks every new client that most of them have never considered.How to move from golden handcuffs to living in choice, in your career and at home.The “then what?” exercise that shrinks your biggest fear about asking hard questions.About the guest: Michelle Pollack is a leadership and executive coach who spent years climbing the ladder in the entertainment industry before a 2008 layoff pushed her off it. She now works with high achievers who look successful on paper and feel hollow underneath, helping them do the inner work to lead from choice instead of autopilot. Website: https://michellepollack.com. LinkedIn, Instagram, or @MichellePollack  What to find your leadership gaps: take the free Leadership Gap Diagnostic at https://balloffirecoaching.com/opt-inReady to talk? Book a discovery call with Bernadette at https://coachmebernadette.com/discoverycallPowerhouses, if this episode hit home, follow Shedding the Corporate Bitch and leave a review so more people can find it.Support the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!Don't thrust yourself into a new leadership role before you listen to this episode or you'll risk setting yourself up for failure. Bernadette Boas breaks down why traditional “first 90 days” leadership playbooks miss the messy human realities of stepping into a new people manager role. They overlook the fear, politics, being watched, and the shift from tactical execution to strategic leadership that often trips up new leaders or even experienced ones moving into a new team, function, or company. Bernadette shares a three-phase 90-Day framework used with executive clients: days She also outlines how HR partners should support with patience, advocacy, and progress tracking, and reframes imposter syndrome as a sign of attention and seriousness.00:00 Leadership Myths vs Reality01:24 The Real 90 Days Framework02:36 Day 1 to 30 Self Audit05:06 Shut Up and Listen09:57 Pattern Recognition Phase12:44 Validate Findings and Pace18:24 Day 61 to 90 Take Action21:58 Avoid Two Leadership Traps23:55 HR Partnering for Success25:55 Imposter Syndrome Reframe28:28 Summary and Next Steps29:50 Closing and SubscribeKEY TAKEAWAYSThe playbook doesn't account for the fear, politics, and human reality of stepping into leadership.Phase 1 (Days 1–30): Start with self-assessment, then listen. Spend 70% of your time in conversations. Don't solve problems yet—map the landscape.Phase 2 (Days 31–60): Recognize patterns. Validate findings. Understand the informal power structure. Move smarter, not faster.Phase 3 (Days 61–90): Make one small, evidence-based move. Show you listened. Build credibility through alignment.The four biggest mistakes: bad-mouthing predecessors, confusing new ideas with leadership, trying to be everyone's friend, assuming competence speaks for itself.Imposter syndrome isn't weakness—it's a sign you're paying attention and taking the role seriously.Your job is not to be perfect. It's to be present, intentional, and willing to learn.RESOURCES & MENTIONSMichael Watkins' "The First 90 Days" — The classic playbook on transitionsHBR IdeaCast — Leadership content and researchLeadership Gap Diagnostic — Free assessment to understand your gaps before stepping into a new role: balloffirecoaching.com/opt-inBall of Fire Coaching — Executive coaching for leaders stepping into new roles: balloffirecoaching.comCALL TO ACTIONWant to talk about how to navigate your 90-day plan with a Powerhouse coach? Schedule a discovery call: coachmebernadette.com/discoverycallWant to know where your leadership gaps are before you step into a new role? Take the free Leadership Gap Diagnostic: balloffirecoaching.com/opt-inABOUT BERNADETTEBernadette Boas is an executive leadership coach with 25+ years of corporate leadership experience and 18+ years of coaching 400+ executives across Fortune 500 and high-growth organizations. After being fired and labeled a "difficult boss," she built Ball of Fire Coaching to help leaders shed the corporate BS and lead with authenticity.She's the host of Shedding the Corporate Bitch, a podcast and YouTube show for Powerhouses ready to lead differently.Support the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!Do you experience Sunday-night dread, sleepless nights, or simply unmotivated to go the extra mile? How is it impacting your effectiveness on the job?Driven leaders push through all of it, and that's exactly how drift takes the wheel and controls how you show up each day, and more importantly how your team experiences you.I sat down with Dr. Cynthia Bentzen-Mercer who shows you how to spot drift early and take back your direction in seven minutes a day.About the GuestDr. Cynthia Bentzen-Mercer is Founder & CEO of Bentzen Performance Partners [confirm], a Board Certified Coach and SPHR with a PhD in social psychology and an MBA. After 30 years in corporate HR, she co-authored the USA Today bestseller Now, Near, Next and wrote Human Capital Investment Strategy. Find her free drift diagnostics at dr-cynthia.com Key Takeaways•     Your body tells on you first. Sunday-night dread, chronic headaches, and sleeping too much or too little are signals that something is out of alignment.•     Drift hides in five areas: your physical and mental health, your relationships, your finances, your potential, and your purpose.•     Drift shows up most in type-A achievers, because we're not quitters. We muddle through until we slam into something.•     There are three patterns: complacency (not paying attention), avoidance (knowing and not dealing), and incremental drift (one-off moments that are actually a pattern).•     Nobody is truly stuck. Time keeps moving, and the drifting years don't come back.•     Organizations drift too. Strong financials can hide lagging people indicators, and AI makes betting on uniquely human strengths more important than ever.Be sure to tune in to hear Cynthia's 7-minute practice that can change everything for you.Subscribe to the show so you don't miss a single guest or powerhouse discussion: https://pod.link/shedthecorporatebitchLink in with Bernadette - https://linkedin.com/in/bernadetteboasSupport the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!ABOUT THIS EPISODE:After more than 400 executives coached, I have found one common attribute of those executives who successfully transforms: they were truly coachable. Most executives aren't. They think they're open-minded, they say they take feedback, they insist they want to grow, but the moment feedback is given to them that makes them uncomfortable, they start defending, explaining it away, making excuses. That's not coachability. That's theater, it's performing.  In this episode, Bernadette Boas, executive leadership coach and founder of Ball of Fire Coaching, cuts through the BS and shows you exactly what real coachability looks like, how to assess it in yourself and your teams, and what to do if you're not there yet. She breaks down the three pillars of coachability that separate executives who transform from those who stay stuck and reveals the costly mistakes hiring managers and HR leaders make when they invest in coaching too early. If you're coaching your team, hiring a coach for yourself, or wondering why your coaching investments aren't delivering ROI, this episode is for you.WHAT YOU WILL LEARN:• How to spot theater coachability vs. real coachability and why most leaders are performing• The 3 Pillars of Coachability: Ownership, Curiosity, and Commitment (and why you need all three)• How to assess your own readiness for coaching and know if you're truly ready to change• What HR leaders and hiring managers must evaluate before investing in coaching programs• The 5-step roadmap to develop coachability if you're not there yet• Why coaching fails when someone is ready for coaching and how to identify real transformation potentialKEY QUOTE: "Coachability isn't about who you are, it's about where you are right now. It's a skill that can be learned, meaning you can develop it if you decide you want to." — Bernadette BoasEPISODE CHAPTERS & TIMESTAMPS:0:00 – Opening: The One Thing Transformed Executives Have in Common 1:50 – Theater vs. Real Coachability: What Performing Looks Like 4:24 – The 3 Pillars of Coachability: Ownership, Curiosity, and Commitment 8:45 – What Happens When You're Missing One or Two Pillars 14:00 – Why HR Leaders Must Assess Readiness Before Hiring a Coach 22:00 – My Most Difficult Client Story: The Cost of Missed Readiness 31:30 – How to Develop Coachability: Your 5-Step Roadmap 37:00 – Outro: Your Next Step + Discovery Call InvitationDOWNLOAD A FREE COACHABILITY SELF-ASSESSMENT:Not sure where you stand as a leader? Take the free Coachability Self-Assessment and identify which pillar: Ownership, Curiosity, or Commitment is missing, and therefore may need some work prior to investing in coaching. You can use it for yourself or team members. Download at: https://balloffirecoaching.kit.com/coachabilityREADY TO DISCUSS COACHING:If you're coachable and ready to go deeper, let's talk. Book your free 30-minute discovery call with Bernadette to explore whether coaching is right for you: coachmebernadette.com/discoverycallSupport the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!Breathwork isn't wellness. Learn the 60-second nervous system reset executives use to reclaim clarity, presence, and leadership influence.  About This Episode: Most executives don't realize they're holding their breath through back-to-back meetings. Your nervous system stays in overdrive, your thinking fogs, decisions that should take five minutes take thirty, and your presence—the thing that makes people trust you starts eroding. Breathwork isn't wellness fluff. It's the executive tool for clarity, presence, and influence.  In this episode, Brett Aldrich, founder of Seed the Spirit, reveals the exact breathing practices executives are using to reset instantly, step from reaction to solution, and prove their credibility without saying a word. From 4-4-4 breathing at your desk to dual nostril breathing for neutrality, Brett walks through three practices you can start today, plus why rest, not hustle, is how leaders deliver more value.  If you're managing your nervous system like a performance problem instead of a body problem, this conversation will change how you think about leadership presence.  What You Will Learn: • How to reclaim mental clarity in 60 seconds—the practice that works between meetings • Why your credibility depends on your nervous system and how to prove it • The 4-4-4 breathing technique: when to use it and why it resets faster than coffee • Dual nostril breathing: the practice that brings your body to center • Circular breathing: how to process a nonstop day without burning out • Why rest isn't lazy, it's the fastest path to executive performance • The exact mistake most leaders make that keeps them trapped in reaction mode About the Guest: Brett Aldrich is founder of Seed the Spirit, a breathwork and nervous system coaching practice. After years in high-stress corporate and victim advocacy roles, she recognized that burnout is a body problem, not a mindset fix. Now she teaches leaders and entrepreneurs how small breathing practices compound into big health and career wins. Visit seedthespirit.com or connect on Facebook: Seed the Spirit.  About Bernadette: Bernadette Boas is an executive leadership coach and founder of Ball of Fire Coaching. After 25+ years in corporate leadership (VP, Chief Knowledge Officer) and 18+ years coaching 400+ executives across Fortune 500 and high-growth organizations, she was fired for being "too difficult"—the best thing that happened to her. Now she helps leaders navigate burnout, reclaim their presence, and lead from their power. Website: balloffirecoaching.com | LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/bernardetteboas  Resources & Related Episodes: → Take the Leadership Gap Diagnostic: https://balloffirecoaching.com/opt-in → Schedule Your Discovery Call: coachmebernadette.com/discoverycall → The Burnout Trap No One Talks About: https://balloffirecoaching.com/truth-about-burnout/ → Your Team Isn’t Underperforming, They’re Under-Directed: https://balloffirecoaching.com/clear-expectations/->The Non-Negotiable Leaders Miss and Why They End Up Micromanaging: https://balloffirecoaching.com/why-leaders-micromanage/  Subscribe & Follow: New episodes every Tuesday on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and Buzzsprout. Subscribe to stay connected and never miss an episode. LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/bernardetteboas | Instagram: @shedthecorpbitch | Facebook: @shifttorichSupport the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!Your high-potential just hit a ceiling she can't see. Your strong contributor is running a toxic sub-team and you're not sure how to course-correct without losing him. Your new promotion deserves better than a "good luck" and a handbook.Executive coaching is the $20 billion industry you're underusing.Most HR leaders and hiring managers know coaching works; the ROI is proven, engagement lifts, retention improves. But most don't hire coaches, or when they do, they hire badly. They lack effective vetting questions, and a framework that doesn't just rely on a certificate that doesn't carry any weight if someone can't actually create change.This week on Shedding the Corporate Bitch, Bernadette walks through the exact framework she uses to evaluate coaches for her 400+ executive clients. It includes 15 total questions; 10 universal ones every leader should ask, plus 5 critical ones if you're an HR or business leaders investing in coaching for your organization.What You Will Learn• How to accelerate high potentials and fix struggling teams through the right coach match• The 15-question vetting framework that separates great coaches from poor hires• Red flags in coach selection and how to spot them in your first conversation• Why chemistry alone is not enough and not all certficates and credentials are a quaranteeKey Quote:"The best leaders in the world have coaches. It's not because they're broken. It's because they want to show up as the best leader they can be."Episode Chapters0:00 — Introduction0:32 — Why Leaders Don't Hire Coaches (Even When Coaching Works)1:30 — Who This Episode Is For3:35 — Why Coaching Matters and the ROI5:59 — Common Hiring Mistakes Leaders Make8:00 — The 10 Universal Vetting Questions32:55 — The 5 HR-Specific Vetting Questions35:48 — How to Make Your Final Decision37:35 — Your Challenge This Week38:00 — Closing Invitation and Next StepsWant to determine if there are leadership gaps that need attention? Take our free Leadership Gap Diagnostic that takes 10 minutes and pinpoints exactly where you need support. Get started: https://balloffirecoaching.com/opt-inAbout Bernadette BoasBernadette Boas is an executive leadership coach, founder of Ball of Fire Coaching, and author of Shedding the Corporate Bitch. With 25+ years in corporate leadership roles (VP and Chief Knowledge Officer) and 16+ years coaching 400+ executives across Fortune 500 and high-growth companies, she transforms leaders and teams.About Shedding the Corporate BitchEvery episode transforms today's managers into tomorrow's powerhouse leaders. Subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you listen.Support the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!About This EpisodeMost leaders treat employee turnover like a compensation problem or a market problem. Kevin Patrick of Trinity One Consulting spent 15 years inside ERP systems implementations before realizing it's neither; it's a trust problem, and it's fixable.In this episode, Kevin walks through the Dream Manager methodology: a model built on the idea that people give a company their best work when the company genuinely invests in their life outside of it. Kevin shares how a Florida home builder used it to attack a 58% turnover rate in its sales division, and why the math on turnover; lost salaries, ramp time, and tribal knowledge gets into the tens of millions faster than most leaders expect.Stop wondering why your best people leave even when the paycheck is right, and understand the first step you can take to prevent it.What You Will Learn•      Trust: why treating people as “a paycheck for eight hours” quietly erodes your influence as a leader•      Visibility: how to spot disengagement before it costs you a resignation letter•      Results: the real financial math behind employee turnover, department by department•      Trust: the one question that gets even guarded employees to open up•      Influence: why bringing frontline employees, not just managers, into major decisions changes outcomesKey Quote“Numbers don't lie. Math is math when you do it right.” — Kevin PatrickEpisode Chapters0:00 Why 78% of your team has already checked out1:54 The catalyst: why business isn't just systems4:25 The real reason employees disengage at work6:02 Why the wrong people are in the room during big rollouts8:57 What the Dream Manager method actually is10:00 Case study: 58% turnover in a 400-person sales team14:25 How to pitch this internally: the numbers-first approach20:00 Inside a real Dream Manager conversation26:04 Can managers become Dream Managers themselves?30:21 Your first step: what to bring to the conversation33:28 The Bozeman, Montana downsell story35:06 Where to find Kevin PatrickAbout the GuestKevin "KP" Patrick is Founder and CEO of Trinity One Consulting and Director of Operations at Anton Systems. A Certified Dream Manager and EOS Integrator with 30+ years in business, he helps businesses optimize operations through AI and people-first leadership. He also hosts The Dream Dividend podcast and coaches youth football in St. Augustine, FL.Related EpisodesLeadership Blind Spots: Why Your Best People Keep Quitting with DEBBIE LONGOWhy Top Performers Keep Getting Passed Over for Promotion with TIM SHARP Career Path Strategy: How To Drive Your Own Career Direction DOWNLOAD OUR FREE Leadership Gap Diagnostic: HERESubscribe HERESupport the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!You've done the work. You've discovered who you are, confronted the fears running your leadership, shed the old story, and started creating something new. So why does one bad day, one hard conversation, one piece of sharp feedback still have the power to send you right back to where you started?In the final 5th episode of the From Stuck to Leading series, Bernadette Boas breaks down why a new identity doesn't happen overnight, a habit takes roughly 66 days to embed, and decades of old stories don't dissolve in a single breakthrough. She walks through the exact 4-part loop that turns fragile progress into permanent, compounding change: building your evidence file, elevating your standards on purpose, restructuring your circle, and treating the whole process as iterative instead of one-and-done. Plus a real client story of a leader who used this loop to recover from a major organizational shakeup without losing the ground he'd gained.This is the fifth and final episode of the From Stuck to Leading series, following Discover, Confront, Shed, and Create — start with Episode 1 if you're joining new, since today's episode builds directly on all four. Go to https://balloffirecoaching.com/podcast to find those episodes.What We Cover●      [00:00] Why you can't accelerate on an empty tank●      [00:53] Series recap: Discover, Confront, Shed, Create●      [03:44] The five steps, redefined for daily use●      [06:00] Why new identities don't happen overnight — the 66-day reality●      [11:28] The four-part acceleration loop: evidence, standards, circle, iteration●      [19:44] Client story: rebuilding momentum after a major reorg●      [25:46] Putting the loop into action — the 4 moves●      [30:56] Bernadette's own story, the closing coaching question, and what's nextKey Quote"You can't accelerate on an empty tank." — Bernadette BoasLinks Mentioned●      Free Leadership Gap Diagnostic: ●      60-Minute Diagnostic Deep Dive (results walkthrough + 60-day action plan): tiny.cc/diagnosticdeepdive●      Website: balloffirecoaching.comAbout the ShowShedding the Corporate B!tch is a weekly leadership podcast for executives ready to stop performing and start leading from who they really are.About the HostBernadette Boas is an executive leadership coach, speaker, and author, and the founder of Ball of Fire Coaching, with 25+ years of corporate leadership experience and 16+ years coaching 400+ executives across Fortune 500 and high-growth organizations.Support the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!About This EpisodeMost leaders assume their team's friction is a personality clash. Executive and business coach Debbie Longo says it's almost always behavior, and the leadership blind spot she runs into most is control and manipulation. In this episode, Debbie walks through how a single thought becomes a behavior, why some leaders need to hit a “bottom” before they'll change, and why real, lasting change starts with seeing the pattern in yourself before anyone else has to point it out.  Bernadette and Debbie also get into the tension every HR leader and manager feels: real behavior change can happen fast, but it doesn't happen on command,  and pushing for speed without patience is often what derails it.What You Will Learn•       Rebuild trust with your team by recognizing the one behavior pattern most executives never catch in themselves•       Stop the control-and-manipulation cycle before it tanks sales and drives out your best people•       Use a 2-minute nightly inventory to catch blind spots before they cost you your job•       Turn pressure from your board or boss into a fast, focused action plan instead of denial•       Understand why real behavior change can show up in weeks, and what determines the pace•       Protect your influence and credibility by leading from awareness instead of ego•       Give HR and managers a clear, patient way to talk about the pace of real changeKey Quote“I changed my thinking, and everyone around me changed.” — Debbie LongoEpisode Chapters00:01 – Why behavior, not personality, drives leadership effectiveness00:04 – The mindset-shift example: catching a bad outcome before it happens00:07 – What hitting bottom actually looks like (divorce, job loss, losing a house)00:08 – Why HR and managers underestimate how long real change takes00:10 – The message to HR leaders and hiring managers: patience over pace00:14 – How control and manipulation actually develops 00:16 – Why controlling leaders can't see it in themselves00:20 – "I change myself... everybody around me changes" — the ripple effect00:20 – Where accountability fits in (board/boss pressure forcing change)00:22 – How Debbie tells a client they're not actually changing00:24 – The #1 tip: the nightly self-inventory exercise00:26 – Wrap-up and where to find DebbieAbout the GuestDebbie Longo is an Executive Behavioral Coach, speaker, and podcast host with more than 24 years of experience helping leaders improve communication, accountability, and performance by changing behaviors that drive results. She equips executives and business owners with practical strategies that strengthen leadership, culture, and long-term business success.About the HostBernadette Boas is a corporate executive leadership coach, speaker, and founder of Ball of Fire Coaching.Related EpisodesThe Accidental Leader: Manager vs. Leader Your Team is Being Under-Directed!!5 Steps to Move From Top Performer to True LeaderLeadership Gap Diagnostic CTATake the free Leadership Gap Diagnostic → balloffirecoaching.com/opt-inSubscribe CTASubscribe on YouTube or your favorite podcast app so you never miss a Powerhouse conversation.Support the show

We'd love to hear from you. Send us fan mail!You did the work and you let go of the old story, the fear, the pattern that kept you stuck. So why does it still feel like nothing's actually changed?In this episode, Bernadette Boas breaks down the mistake nearly every leader makes right after a real breakthrough: mistaking the relief of letting go for the finish line. She walks through the five-part foundation — trust, integrity, motivation, empowerment, and results that turns genuine growth into an actual new career, plus the 4 specific moves to build a new identity on purpose instead of by accident.This is Episode 4 of the five-part From Stuck to Leading series, following Discover, Confront, and Shed.What We Cover●      0:00 — Why relief isn't the finish line, and the exact point most people quietly stop building●      8:00 — The foundation that makes growth actually stick: trust, integrity, motivation, empowerment, results●      14:40 — "You'd be surprised how little others think of you" — the sentence that changed how she leads●      21:30 — The 4 moves to build a new identity on purpose●      30:00 — The networking party story: 40 friends down to 5●      35:00 — The coaching question, the dare, and what's next in Episode 5Key Quote"You'd be surprised how little others think of you." — Bernadette BoasLinks Mentioned●      Listen to Episode 1-3: balloffirecoaching.com/podcast●      Free Leadership Gap Diagnostic: balloffirecoaching.com/opt-in●      Book a 30-min Discovery Call: coachmebernadette.com/discoverycall●      Website: balloffirecoaching.comAbout the ShowShedding the Corporate B!tch is a weekly leadership podcast for executives ready to stop performing and start leading from who they really are.About the HostBernadette Boas is an executive leadership coach, speaker, and author, and the founder of Ball of Fire Coaching, with 25+ years of corporate leadership experience and 16+ years coaching 400+ executives across Fortune 500 and high-growth organizations.Support the show