Q&A: Nervous System Regulation, Identity, Extreme Hunger & Going All In During Eating Disorder Recovery

Welcome to the January Q&A episode of Fly to Freedom.This monthly Q&A comes directly from inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle and features real questions from real people navigating the complex, emotional, and deeply human process of eating disorder recovery.In this episode, Julia answers questions around nervous system regulation, identity, extreme hunger, perfectionism, control, and the exhausting cycle of food and exercise. These are conversations for anyone who wants recovery, but feels overwhelmed, unsure, or afraid of letting go of the strategies that once felt safe.Throughout the episode, Julia explores how healing is not about fixing yourself, but about learning how to stay with yourself — even when fear is loud, even when the body feels dysregulated, and even when recovery feels slow.How to regulate the nervous system during eating disorder recovery without forcing calmWhy recovery can feel threatening to the body, even when it’s what you wantWhat nervous system regulation really looks like when fear and panic are presentExtreme hunger in recovery: why some people experience it strongly and others don’tWhy feeling full quickly or disconnected from hunger cues is common and meaningfulHow anxiety, stress, and past restriction affect digestion and hunger signalsIdentity confusion in long-term eating disorder recoveryHow to tell where the eating disorder ends and where you beginPerfectionism, control, sensitivity, and self-imposed rules — coping strategies, not character flawsPerimenopause, ageing, and emotional sensitivity in recoveryLetting go of control while learning to feel safe in your bodyGoing “all in” with food and exercise without overwhelming your nervous systemWhy recovery is about presence, not perfection or speedHow compassion and safety create sustainable healingThis episode is for you if you:Feel dysregulated or panicked during recoveryWorry that your hunger signals are “wrong”Feel unsure who you are without the eating disorderFeel stuck in cycles of food challenges and compensatory behavioursWant recovery, but need it to honour your nervous system and capacityJulia gently reminds you that your responses make sense, your body is protecting you, and recovery is about coming home to yourself — not becoming someone else.If you want ongoing support alongside therapy or clinical care, this is exactly the kind of conversation that happens every month inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle.Inside the circle, members receive:Monthly live Q&A sessionsGroup coaching callsExpert-led workshops and coursesThe Feelings Navigator to help you work with emotions in the moment24/7 peer support from people who truly understand eating disorder recoveryYou are welcome exactly as you are, and you do not have to do recovery alone.🧭 Explore the Feelings Navigator:https://www.edrecoverycircle.com/how-are-you-feeling🌐 Website:https://www.edrecoverycircle.comhttps://juliatrehane.com📸 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/juliatrehane

Bulimia can feel confusing, shame-filled, and deeply misunderstood — especially when the binge–purge cycle starts to feel automatic, secretive, or bigger than willpower.In this episode of Fly To Freedom, I’m joined by Dr Rachel Evans (psychologist, hypnotherapist, and host of the Just Eat Normally podcast). Rachel brings both lived experience and specialist knowledge of bulimia, and she helps me unpack what bulimia actually is, why the behaviours happen, and how recovery can become possible — even when things have felt stuck for a long time.We talk about the psychology and biology behind bingeing and purging, the role of fear and compulsion, and the myths that keep people trapped — including myths around calories, laxatives, and exercise. I also share openly that my lived experience is with anorexia, not bulimia, and I invite Rachel to guide the conversation with accuracy and compassion.How Rachel describes bulimia (and why diagnosis labels can feel vague or limiting)What makes a binge feel like a binge (including secrecy, speed, dissociation, and “I can’t stop” urgency)The different types of compensatory behaviours, including vomiting, laxatives, fasting, and compulsive exerciseWhy it’s often the intention and fear underneath a behaviour that shows whether it’s becoming a problemThe myths people get taught about laxatives and purging, and why they’re never the “solution” the eating disorder promisesHow exercise can become a form of purging — even when it looks “healthy” from the outsideWhy bingeing and purging can create a “high” or sense of relief (and how that reinforces the cycle)Why understanding what the behaviour is doing for you matters more than shameWhy eating disorders often morph and change over time, especially around big life eventsWhy punishment never creates healing — and why compassion and understanding actually change thingsA practical next step: gently noticing patterns (feelings, triggers, restriction, urges) without judgementRecovery is possible. You can live without the constant shadow of food thoughts, urges, shame, and compensation. You deserve support that helps you understand what’s driving the cycle — and what to do instead.Rachel is a psychologist and hypnotherapist, and the host of the Just Eat Normally podcast. She has lived experience of bulimia recovery and supports people who want to step out of the binge–purge cycle for good.Website: eatingdisordertherapist.co.ukInstagram: rachel.evans.phdPodcast: Just Eat NormallyI also share where you can find ongoing support inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle: https://www.edrecoverycircle.com/You can find more recovery tips and 1:1 coaching at Juliatrehane.com And you can always find me over on Instagram @juliatrehane

This was a tough episode to record, but I've felt that it needed to be recorded for some time. I'd like your comments! Please tell me if you agree with what I'm saying, if you disagree, how are you affected...... anything! This needs to be talked about.Why? Because weight loss injections are everywhere at the moment.It's not the medication itself that matters most to me — it’s the message travelling with it.In this episode of Fly to Freedom, I speak openly about why the current cultural obsession with appetite suppression feels so unsettling, especially through the lens of eating disorder recovery, nervous system health, and body trust.I must say that this is not a medical episode.It is not advice.It is not a judgement of anyone’s choices.It is a deeply human conversation about what happens when hunger is framed as a flaw, appetite is treated as something to eliminate, and smaller bodies are quietly sold as safer, better, and more worthy.Together, we explore how weight loss injections are being positioned not just as a treatment, but as an idea — the idea that the body is a problem to solve, that discomfort should be bypassed, and that control equals responsibility. She unpacks why this message can feel like relief in a world that already teaches body hatred, and why that relief can still come at a cost.This episode looks at:How appetite suppression reshapes our relationship with hunger, sensation, and trustWhy this cultural moment is particularly dangerous for people in eating disorder recoveryThe nervous system impact of living in a world that celebrates silencing hungerThe difference between short-term relief and long-term healingHow control around food and weight has become moralisedWhy body dissatisfaction is not vanity, but survival in a judgement-heavy cultureThe familiar patterns that fuel eating disorder cycles — even when they appear calm or “responsible”Who benefits when bodies are treated as problems, and who quietly pays the priceI speak honestly about the grief, fear, anger, and confusion this movement can stir — especially for those learning that eating is safe, that hunger can be trusted, and that bodies are not enemies.If you are using weight loss injections, or considering them, you are welcome here. This episode does not pull the ground from beneath you. It gently asks where worth has been taught to live, and whether shrinking has become the price of belonging.At the core, I want to ask you a quieter, deeper question:What kind of relationship do you want to have with your body over a lifetime — one built on control, or one built on trust?Choosing body trust in a culture that profits from doubt is countercultural. It can feel lonely. It can feel scary. And it is deeply powerful.This is why The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle exists — to talk about hunger, fear, worth, and bodies out loud, together. Not to fix bodies, but to support real people navigating a very loud world.If this sort of life is what you're searching for, I encourage you to reach out. Steps to take now:Subscribe to this podcastFollow me on InstagramJoin my Email FamilyTake the best step and join us in the Circle.Whatever you do, just keep taking recovery actions. Every day.

After nearly 150 episodes of Fly to Freedom, I’ve been reflecting on the conversations that have genuinely shifted people forward in eating disorder recovery — and this one comes up again and again. This is a re-release of my December 2024 chat with Chris Sandel (Real Health Radio), and it’s one of the most listened-to episodes for a reason.Chris and I talk about full recovery from an eating disorder (yes, full), why “consuming information” can become a way to stall, and why action is what changes the brain — even when anxiety is loud. We also explore how eating disorders function like anxiety disorders (avoidance, fear, and the nervous system), why tiny “safe” changes often keep the eating disorder in charge, and what it actually looks like to rebuild a life with identity, freedom, and joy.If eating disorder recovery has felt like Groundhog Day — the same rules, the same prison, the same fear — this conversation will help you see a clearer path out.Why full recovery is possible (and why “settling for less” keeps people stuck) Buzzsprout+1The most common recovery trap: learning everything… and changing nothing beefound.agency+1Why meaningful recovery changes must be big enough to shift physiology (not negotiated down)Eating disorders as anxiety disorders: avoidance, fear of consequences, and exposure Cue Podcasts+1How to work with thoughts without getting trapped in analysing them (ACT-style approach)Identity after an eating disorder: filling the “void” with life, connection, and purposeA practical “start today” framework: support, one clear goal, one coping tool, then actionChris Sandel is a nutritionist and coach, founder of Seven Health, and host of Real Health Radio. He specialises in helping people move beyond harm reduction and into lasting, full eating disorder recovery.If this episode helps, a five-star rating genuinely helps Fly to Freedom reach more people who need recovery supportChris Sandel / Seven Health: https://seven-health.comChris’s podcast (Real Health Radio): https://seven-health.com/podcast/

Welcome to Fly to Freedom, and a gentle Happy New Year.This first episode of 2026 explores perfectionism in eating disorder recovery through a nervous system lens, focusing on the constant pressure to be doing things right.This episode may resonate if recovery feels structured, controlled, or driven by self-pressure, even when motivation and care are present.This episode speaks to the quiet, ongoing pressure many people feel to stay on track, stay capable, and keep doing things properly. A sense that effort needs to continue. That vigilance needs to remain. That doing things right somehow keeps everything steady.Many notice this pressure not as a thought, but as a bodily state. A leaning forward. A readiness. An internal monitoring that rarely switches off. The feeling that effort is required to remain safe, acceptable, or okay.These patterns develop because they once created structure and predictability. When being organised, prepared, or impressive reduced risk or increased belonging, the nervous system learned to stay alert. Over time, doing things right began to feel essential rather than optional.In this episode, I explore how this pressure shows up across everyday life and recovery. In productivity that feels regulating. In difficulty resting. In managing time carefully. In control around food that appears disciplined or generous. In recovery itself becoming something to perform well. These responses emerge because the nervous system is adapting to uncertainty.Perfectionism and eating disorders often reinforce one another because both offer clarity and structure. Rules reduce ambiguity. Control brings temporary relief. As recovery unfolds and old frameworks soften, the pressure to do things right often relocates rather than disappearing.Change unfolds through experience rather than insight alone. Each moment of resting while things remain unfinished allows the nervous system to register safety. Each experience of being accepted while imperfect reshapes threat responses. Gradually, the body learns that safety exists without constant effort.Growth rarely follows a straight line. Calm and fear frequently coexist. Softening unfolds alongside vigilance. Movement forward arrives at a pace the nervous system can absorb.Inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle, these experiences are held with shared language, nervous system awareness, and support from people who recognise the realities of recovery. The perfectionism workshop connected to this episode is available within the circle and offers space to practise safety, embodiment, and gentler ways of being.This episode offers an orientation rather than a task.When the pressure to do things right appears, curiosity can soften the moment.A quiet question may arise: What feels at risk if effort eases?Thank you for being here, and for beginning this new year with yourself.That workshop: Visit this web pageMy website: https://www.juliatrehane.com/The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle

Welcome to this episode of Fly To Freedom — a Q and A session filled with real, honest questions from inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle. If recovery has felt confusing, scary, messy, or strangely “too much”… this episode will help you feel understood, and steady again.We talk about the moment recovery starts to feel terrifying rather than freeing — when the eating disorder has been a familiar “safety structure” for so long that choosing freedom can feel disorienting. You’ll hear why that wobble often means the brain is rewiring, why belief grows through action, and how to keep moving forwards even when certainty feels far away.This episode also covers some of the most searched (and most misunderstood) parts of eating disorder recovery and anorexia recovery: extreme hunger, constant thoughts about food, panic when hunger hits, fears about “healthy eating” turning into new rules, worries about set point and balance, and the wave of physical symptoms that can arrive during weight restoration.Why recovery can feel unreal and frightening even when you’re doing the “right” thingsWhat to do with old photos from the lowest point of the eating disorder (and what it means when sadness shows up)Recovery with a busy life: kids, work, studying, dogs, and chaos — and still choosing freedomGuilt about wanting recovery: why it appears, and how to meet it with courage“All in” as a mindset (not a rigid protocol) — and how to stay committed without turning it into another set of rulesPerfectionism, cleaning, hypervigilance, and anxiety: how these patterns link to the same root system as an eating disorderEating disorder behaviours that start in adulthood: why inner child work still matters, and what it’s really aboutThe moment restriction starts feeling “impossible”: why biology can begin protecting you (and why that’s a win)“Healthy” rules like five a day or “clean eating”: how to spot restriction dressed up as wellnessConstant food thoughts even at a stable weight: why weight is not a measure of mental recovery, and what food preoccupation often signalsHunger panic and urgency: why it can feel extreme, and how proactive nourishment rebuilds trustExtreme hunger in the evenings: why it happens, how long it can last, and what consistency teaches the bodyItchy, sensitive skin and hair changes during weight restoration (including telogen effluvium) and gentle ways to support your bodyThe longing for “balance” and the fear of being too much: rebuilding an inner compass based on values, not shameRecovery belief grows through repetition and action. Each recovered choice teaches the brain what safety really is.Food obsession often eases through permission and consistency. The brain quiets when it truly trusts that food is allowed and available.Freedom includes flexibility. Nourishment supports health, and a rigid rulebook keeps the eating disorder alive in disguise.A busy life can still hold real recovery. Freedom gets built in real-time moments, right in the middle of everything.Finding Your WHY (inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle) — a powerful anchor for staying committed when fear gets loudFeelings Navigator — support for processing emotions and building safety from the inside outIf this episode resonated, daily support like this exists inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle — with community chat, Q and A sessions, group coaching calls, workshops, on-demand courses, and the Feelings Navigator.Join here: https://www.edrecoverycircle.com/join

Christmas can be a beautiful time of year — and it can also feel incredibly overwhelming.There’s often pressure to keep going, keep smiling, keep showing up, even when your body and mind are quietly asking for rest. For anyone navigating eating disorder recovery, this season can amplify anxiety, exhaustion, and emotional overload.This Christmas meditation is an invitation to pause.In this episode of Fly To Freedom, I gently guide you into a short, supportive meditation designed to help you slow down, soften the nervous system, and reconnect with yourself when everything feels like too much. There is no fixing, no pushing, and nothing you need to achieve — just space to breathe and be.This meditation is especially for you if:You’re feeling overwhelmed by Christmas expectations or social demandsYou’re carrying emotional or physical exhaustionYou’re in eating disorder recovery and finding this time of year particularly challengingYou need permission to take time out without guiltWe focus on self-care that is simple and human, reminding you that rest is not something you have to earn. Taking time for yourself is part of recovery, not a distraction from it.You are allowed to step back. You are allowed to slow down. You are allowed to choose yourself — even at Christmas.You can return to this meditation whenever you need grounding, reassurance, or a few quiet moments just for you.💛 And if you're looking for real support from people who’ve been there and truly get it, The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle is here for you. It’s a unique community of people at all stages of recovery, supporting each other through the mess, the milestones, and everything in between.Inside, you’ll also find the Feelings Navigator to guide you through hard emotions, monthly coaching calls, live workshops, on-demand recovery courses, and of course — me, Julia, here with you every step of the way.Come be part of something that actually helps. You don’t have to do this alone.

In this heartfelt episode of Fly to Freedom, I have the privilege of speaking with Di Archer, the CEO and co-founder of tastelife UK. Di shares her personal journey into the world of eating disorders, detailing how her family's experience led to the creation of tastelife UK—a charity dedicated to providing support, education, and recovery tools for those affected by eating disorders. We delve into the challenges faced by families, the importance of understanding eating disorders beyond the surface, and the transformative power of community support in the recovery process.Key Takeaways:Personal Journey: Di discusses her family's initial lack of understanding about eating disorders and how a personal crisis led to the founding of tastelife UK.Founding of tastelife UK: Established in 2014, tastelife UK offers an 8-session Community Recovery Course designed for individuals and families affected by eating disorders. Community Support: The charity emphasizes the importance of community in recovery, providing a safe space for individuals and families to share experiences and support each other.Prevention and Education: Tastelife UK focuses on prevention by offering resources for young people in schools and youth groups, aiming to equip them with the knowledge to avoid developing eating disorders. Recovery Tools: The Community Recovery Course is non-threatening, educational, and encourages a self-help approach, helping individuals and families break free from eating disorders.Accreditation and Training: Tastelife UK provides accredited training for leaders to run recovery courses, ensuring quality support for those affected. Listen to the full episode here:About Di Archer:Di is a trainer, writer, and speaker with a theological background. Family experience led to her co-founding and now heading up tastelife. She loves working with the gifted tastelife team and volunteers, and is delighted that together they offer such innovative and effective resources for those affected by eating disorders. Di and her husband Graham have three grown-up children, an assortment of gorgeous grandchildren... and a hot tub. The latter for medicinal purposes, of course! (tastelifeuk.org)Connect with Di Archer and tastelife UK:Website: (tastelifeuk.org)Email: [email protected] Media:Facebook: tastelife UKTwitter: @tastelifeukInstagram: @tastelifeuk

In this episode of Fly to Freedom, I sit down with the wonderful George Mycock, a lived experience PhD researcher at the University of Worcester whose work is reshaping how we understand eating disorders in men.George specialises in men’s access to healthcare for eating, exercise, and body image psychopathology, bringing both academic expertise and deeply personal experience to this conversation. He’s also the founder of MyoMinds and host of the MyoMinds Podcast — a mental health organisation dedicated to improving understanding of exerciser mental health through research, education, and powerful lived-experience storytelling.Through MyoMinds, George collaborates on a range of national projects, contributes to media across podcasts, radio and TV, and holds influential roles such as serving on the Mental Health and Movement Alliance at Mind and the steering board for the National Audit of Eating Disorders at the Royal College of Psychiatrists. His insight is both academically rich and profoundly human.In our conversation, we explore the hidden landscape of eating disorders in men — an area still surrounded by silence, shame and misunderstanding. Together we talk about:✨ George’s lived experience of muscularity-driven disordered eating and compulsive exercise✨ The intense cultural pressure on men to appear “strong” and emotionless✨ How emotional suppression, identity, and masculinity norms shape men’s mental health✨ Why so many men feel unwelcome or unseen within eating disorder treatment services✨ What George’s research reveals about gender bias in public-facing information✨ The critical need for more inclusive, diverse, and representative research✨ Alexithymia, emotional literacy, and why so many people with eating disorders struggle to name what they feel✨ How we can each help dismantle stigma and make space for men to access support✨ Why commenting on someone’s body — even positively — can reinforce shame✨ How recovery becomes possible when we stop being who we think the world expects us to beThis is an important, compassionate, and eye-opening conversation — especially if you’ve ever believed that eating disorders only affect certain types of people. They don’t. Eating disorders do not discriminate, and George’s work is a vital step toward making support truly accessible for all.💛 Connect with George:Website: https://myominds.co.uk/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/myo_minds/💛 Join us inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle:https://www.edrecoverycircle.com/joinIt’s a supportive community grounded in lived experience, where you’ll find the Feelings Navigator, expert workshops, recovery courses, monthly coaching calls, and a place where you never have to face recovery alone.Thank you for listening, and for being here with me. I’ll be back next week.

The festive season is meant to feel joyful, but what if instead it feels like you’re behind frosted glass? You can see the lights, hear the laughter, even play the part — but inside you feel numb, separate and alone.In this episode of Fly to Freedom, I talk about the hidden loneliness and emotional disconnection that can show up during Christmas and how eating disorder recovery can amplify these feelings. I’ll share why your nervous system creates this “glass box,” how numbness is a form of protection rather than failure, and why people-pleasing and perfectionism often feel louder at this time of year.You’ll also learn how to spot the unspoken “rules” you’ve absorbed about how to show up, how to begin gently rewriting them, and what real self-compassion looks like in the moments you feel most disconnected.This episode is a gentle reminder that you are not broken, you are not failing, and you are not alone.✨ Inside you’ll hear:Why numbness is a protective response, not a personal flaw.The role of perfectionism and performance in festive stress.How to dismantle the hidden “rules” that keep you stuck.Simple, honest ways to reconnect with yourself and others.A practice of self-compassion that helps you feel safe in your own body.💛 And if you're looking for real support from people who’ve been there and truly get it, The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle is here for you. It’s a unique community of people at all stages of recovery, supporting each other through the mess, the milestones, and everything in between.Inside, you’ll also find the Feelings Navigator to guide you through hard emotions, monthly coaching calls, live workshops, on-demand recovery courses, and of course—me, Julia, here with you every step of the way.Come be part of something that actually helps. You don’t have to do this alone: https://www.edrecoverycircle.com/join