Episode 103: Missing the Eating Disorder – Why Letting Go Feels Like Grief

When you begin nourishing your body again in eating disorder recovery, it doesn’t just quietly say thank you — it lets you know it's working. And that can feel overwhelming, scary, and confusing. You might even question whether you're doing recovery wrong.In this episode of Fly To Freedom, I’m breaking down what’s really happening behind the physical sensations so many people experience in early recovery — from exhaustion and digestive issues to bloating, edema, joint pain, and more.These are not signs that something’s gone wrong. They’re signs that your body is healing.We’ll explore:Why complete exhaustion is actually a good signWhat’s happening with your digestion (and how long it lasts)Why emotional swings hit hard in recoveryWhat causes bloating, heartburn, and water retention (and why they’re not permanent)How to support yourself through these physical changesWhat your body is really doing behind the scenes when you feel like it’s falling apartThis episode is your reminder that healing is messy — and it’s also miraculous.✨ Part 2 will cover the emotional and neurological changes that happen as your brain heals.Mentioned in this episode:If this episode resonates with you, come and join us inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle — the all-in-one community for eating disorder recovery. You’ll find support, resources, courses, and a place to feel truly understood.Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for medical advice. Everyone’s recovery journey is different. If you're concerned about your health, please speak with a qualified professional.

Episode 104 – Q&A with Victoria and Julia: Exercise in Recovery, Body Image, and the Messy MiddleIn this episode of Fly to Freedom, Julia and Victoria are back with another listener Q&A! They answer your most pressing questions about eating disorder recovery, from reintroducing exercise to dealing with body image struggles and overcoming fears around food.💬 When is it safe to reintroduce exercise in recovery?Victoria and Julia share their personal journeys with exercise addiction and how they navigated reintroducing movement without falling back into compulsive patterns.The importance of checking in with your why—are you moving for joy or to control your body?💬 Coping with body image struggles after the food part of recovery is ‘sorted’Why body image often takes longer to heal than eating habits.Practical strategies for shifting focus away from body size and toward freedom and self-acceptance.💬 The ‘Messy Middle’ of recovery – how to push throughWhy this stage feels so hard (hint: your brain is rewiring!).How to hold onto hope even when you don’t feel the benefits yet.💬 Food obsession – will it ever stop?The difference between mental hunger and true food freedom.Why constantly thinking about food means your body still needs more.💬 Handling societal stigma when recovering into a larger bodyThe power of self-ownership and shifting the focus from appearance to self-worth.How to build a support system that truly values you for who you are.💬 Recovery at an older age – is it ever too late?Julia’s experience starting recovery at 48 and why age is never a barrier to healing.💬 How to move away from a meal plan without slipping into restrictionThe signs that you’re ready to transition away from structured eating.How to trust your body’s cues and avoid sneaky restrictive patterns.💬 Near relapses – what happens if you slip back?Why temporary setbacks don’t mean failure.The importance of self-compassion, accountability, and learning from the experience.💬 Morning hunger struggles – how to overcome the fear of breakfastWhy delaying eating fuels the eating disorder.The simple mindset shift that helps you start your day with recovery instead of restriction.✨ Takeaway Message:Recovery is about choosing freedom over and over again. It’s messy, it’s hard, but it is so worth it. If you’re struggling, know that you’re not alone—and support is out there for you.💜 Join the Circle! The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle is launching on April 1st, offering expert-led support, recovery resources, and a community that truly gets it. Get on the waitlist here: https://www.edrecoverycircle.com📩 Got a question for the next Q&A? Email Julia or Victoria directly—we love hearing from you!

🎙 Welcome back to Fly to Freedom!Have you ever felt a deep sense of loss when letting go of your eating disorder? You’re not alone. In today’s episode, I’m talking about something that many people in recovery experience but often feel afraid to admit—missing the eating disorder.💭 Why would you miss something that caused so much pain?💭 Why does letting go feel so scary, even when you know recovery is right?💭 How can you grieve the eating disorder while still moving forward?In this episode, we explore:✔ Why letting go of an eating disorder feels like grief✔ The neuroscience behind why your brain resists change✔ How the eating disorder created an illusion of control✔ Navigating the panic and fear of losing something that felt like a safety net✔ Practical coping strategies to move through the fear and discomfort✔ A powerful guided visualization to help you feel safe in this process✨ You can miss the eating disorder without wanting to go back.✨ You are not losing yourself—you are rediscovering who you truly are.✨ Freedom is waiting for you, one step at a time.💜 If grief is a feeling you’re struggling with, our new Feelings Navigator inside The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle includes a complete section on grief, with a workbook, journaling prompts, and even a meditation designed to help you process and cope with this raw emotion. Because recovery isn’t just about the actions you take—it’s about learning how to support yourself through the emotions that arise along the way.🔗 Join the conversation & find support:📌 Instagram:instagram.com/juliatrehane📌 Website:juliatrehane.com📌 Community:edrecoverycircle.com👉 If this episode resonated with you, send me a message on Instagram, and let’s talk about it! And if you’re ready for more support, come and be part of The Circle—a space for real connection, understanding, and recovery.🎧 Listen now and take your next step toward freedom. 💜#EatingDisorderRecovery #AnorexiaRecovery #EdRecovery #FoodFreedom #HealingJourney #SelfCompassion #MentalHealthMatters #EdSupport #RewiringTheBrain

53 minutes of sheer interview joy!Today’s episode is an absolute treat as I welcome the marvellous Amy Margolis, LCSW. Amy is a licensed therapist, co-clinical director of Santa Monica Counseling, and an expert in eating disorder recovery. She’s also a seasoned voice actor with credits from Nickelodeon, Netflix, and Disney, but more than anything, she’s a passionate advocate for healing and self-worth.This episode is extra special because Amy and I recorded an incredible conversation previously… only to find out it never saved! Luckily, Amy graciously agreed to return, and honestly, I think this conversation is even better.We cover everything from the anorexic mindset and societal conditioning to the power of vulnerability, the illusion of happiness, and how starvation impacts mental health. Whether you’re in recovery, supporting someone, or just curious about breaking free from deprivation thinking, this episode is packed with insight, wisdom, and practical advice.🔹 10:48 – Personal Journey with Eating Disorders🔹 17:00 – The Anorexic Mindset and Societal Conditioning🔹 23:45 – Challenges and Coping Mechanisms🔹 28:34 – Understanding the Anorexic Mindset🔹 28:55 – The Illusion of Happiness and Fantasy🔹 30:22 – Societal Pressures and Fullness in Life🔹 31:19 – The Impact of Starvation on Mental Health🔹 33:25 – The Core Sentence of Eating Disorders🔹 34:14 – Recovery and Embracing Needs🔹 36:48 – The Power of Vulnerability and Connection🔹 37:05 – Acting Your Way into Right Thinking🔹 40:42 – The Messiness of Life and Control🔹 42:11 – The Strengths of Those with Eating Disorders🔹 43:14 – Women Supporting Women🔹 53:06 – The Importance of JournalingAmy Margolis, LCSW, is a licensed therapist and co-clinical director of Santa Monica Counseling. She works with individuals and couples and leads groups supporting those healing from eating disorders, addictions, anxiety, depression, and related issues. Outside the clinical world, Amy is a Meisner and Groundlings-trained actor with extensive voice-over work for major networks, including Nickelodeon, Netflix, and Disney.Beyond her professional work, Amy is a devoted wife, mother of three, and an advocate for self-love and authenticity.📖 Grab Amy’s book:Here's the Memo – Every memo she wished she had when she needed it most.📲 Follow Amy on Instagram:@heres_the_memo🌐 Website & Contact:amymargolislcsw.com | Email: [email protected]🎙 Did this episode resonate with you? Let’s continue the discussion! Share your thoughts on Instagram @juliatrehane, tag me in your stories, or drop a comment!🔗 Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review—it helps more people find the support they need. 💜Timestamps:Meet Amy MargolisJoin the Conversation

Sorry folks, this episode is audio only, due to a technical fault uploading the video to Spotify. If you really want to see a video version, you can on YouTube at https://youtu.be/TJBNLRnTFcQIn this episode of Fly to Freedom, I’m addressing a topic that is often misunderstood, invalidated, and overlooked—atypical anorexia.If you've ever been told, “You don’t look like you have an eating disorder” or felt like you don’t deserve help because you don’t fit the stereotype of anorexia, this episode is for you.Atypical anorexia is just as severe and life-threatening as anorexia nervosa, yet those who experience it often struggle in silence. I break down the science, misconceptions, and emotional impact of atypical anorexia and share why eating disorders should never be measured by weight alone.You'll learn:🔹 What atypical anorexia actually is and how it’s defined in the DSM-5🔹 Why BMI is an outdated and harmful metric for diagnosing eating disorders🔹 The biological effects of restriction on metabolism, hormones, brain function, and heart health—regardless of weight🔹 How misconceptions and stereotypes delay diagnosis and prevent people from getting the help they deserve🔹 The emotional toll of feeling invalidated and how internalised stigma keeps people trapped in the disorder🔹 The steps towards recovery, including rebuilding body trust, breaking free from restrictive behaviours, and challenging the eating disorder voice🔹 How self-compassion and self-love play a vital role in healing🔹 How working with a recovery coach can help you move past harmful beliefs and towards full freedomIf you've been struggling with thoughts like "I'm not sick enough to recover," please know this: your pain is real, your struggles are valid, and you deserve help. Recovery isn’t about weight—it’s about healing your relationship with food, your body, and yourself.💛 If this episode resonates with you, I’d love to hear from you. Send me a message or reach out for support. You don’t have to do this alone.🎧 Listen now: [insert link]Timestamps:00:00 Introduction and Topic Overview01:06 Defining Atypical Anorexia02:42 The Biological Impact of Food Restriction04:38 Misconceptions and Stereotypes08:48 Emotional and Psychological Toll21:56 Steps Towards Recovery30:57 Self-Compassion and Self-Love33:20 Coaching and Support34:54 Final Encouragement📌 Follow for more support and recovery insights:#AtypicalAnorexia #EatingDisorderRecovery #YouDeserveHelp #MentalHealthMatters #EDAwareness #RecoveryIsPossible #FlyToFreedom

Episode 100: Double Love – Q&A with Julia & Victoria🎉 Celebrating 100 episodes! 🎉This episode is a special one! Today I'm joined by my dear friend Victoria for a powerful, honest, and deeply supportive Q&A session. Together, we reflect on how far we've come—both in recovery and in life—and answer your burning questions about eating disorder recovery, fear, self-love, relationships, and more.In this episode, we discuss:💬 How Julia overcame the fear of starting her podcast – and why fear doesn’t have to hold you back.💪 How recovery changes your perspective on discomfort and growth.🏋️‍♀️ The journey to healing an exercise obsession and learning to enjoy movement for the right reasons.💖 How motherhood shifts self-love and the balance between putting yourself first while caring for others.🍰 Why all foods—including so-called “junk” foods—are essential in recovery.🙌 Real, raw experiences from early recovery: exhaustion, fear, food challenges, and overcoming them.🚫 How to stop caring what others think about weight gain and why true freedom comes from within.💭 How to handle guilty thoughts after eating and silence the eating disorder bully voice.🛑 Why rest is essential—and how to break through the mental barriers stopping you from slowing down.Plus:✔️ The best part of recovery (hint: it's so much more than just food freedom).✔️ Why true self-acceptance changes everything—including the friendships and love you allow into your life.✔️ A special message of hope for anyone struggling.💡 Do you want our next Q&A to have a theme? Let us know what topics you’d love us to cover! ❤️ Thank you for 100 episodes of love, support, and recovery! We are so grateful for you! ❤️Connect with Victoria⁠https://www.instagram.com/victoriakleinsmanofficial⁠https://victoriakleinsman.com/⁠ ⁠[email protected]⁠Engage With MeI’d love to hear your thoughts and stories. Whether you're on your own journey or supporting someone through theirs, share your experiences and tips with us. Together, we can create a supportive community that celebrates each step towards recovery.Website ⁠Juliatrehane.com⁠Email ⁠[email protected]⁠Instagram ⁠https://www.instagram.com/juliatrehane

[[SCROLL DOWN FOR SOMETHING NEW!]]Why is rest so hard? If you’ve ever felt guilty for slowing down, struggled to stop moving, or found yourself filling every quiet moment with busyness, you’re not alone. In this episode, I explore the deep-rooted beliefs that make rest feel impossible—especially in eating disorder recovery.💡Key topics:✔️ Why guilt around rest is so common✔️ The toxic influence of hustle culture and diet culture✔️ How your childhood experiences shaped your relationship with rest✔️ The ‘flee from famine’ response—why your body resists stillness✔️ How to break free from the belief that busyness = worth✔️ Practical ways to reframe rest and allow yourself to slow downThe truth? Youcannot fully recover without fully resting. Your body, mind, and nervous systemneed stillness to heal. If you keep pushing, distracting, or replacing exercise with constant busyness, your body will never feel truly safe.In other news!💜 Struggling to slow down? The Eating Disorder Recovery Circle is here for you!InsideThe Circle, you'll findThe Feelings Navigator, a unique tool to help you process the emotions that make rest feel so difficult—guilt, anxiety, fear of losing control, and the constant urge to "do more." Instead of avoiding or pushing through, you’ll getpractical strategies to work through these feelings in a way that supports your recovery.🔎 Need help working through rest-related anxiety? The Feelings Navigator will guide you with:✔️ Gentle strategies to challenge guilt✔️ A meditation to help you settle into rest✔️ A journaling exercise to explore your fears around slowing down✔️ Practical steps to shift fromdoing tobeing✨You don’t have to navigate this alone. Join the waitlist now and start giving yourself the rest you truly deserve.🔗Sign up now →

Could there be a connection between the principles of Human Design and the patterns of eating disorders, particularly anorexia? In this thought-provoking episode of Fly to Freedom, I’m joined by Katharina Hillenberg—also known as Magic Kathi—to explore this idea. Kathi is an Energy Alchemist, Sonic Anatomy Guide, and host of the Systems of Existence podcast. Specializing in Evolutionary Astrology, the Gene Keys, Human Design, and Vibrational Alignment, she helps people reconnect with their authentic selves, breaking free from conditioning and limitations. As someone navigating her own experience with anorexia, Kathi brings a unique perspective to this conversation, sharing insights into how Human Design might help us understand the deeper patterns behind eating disorders. We discuss: 🔹 How different Human Design profiles process energy and emotions🔹 The role of self-identity, belonging, and environmental influence in eating disorder experiences🔹 Why certain energy types might be more prone to restriction and control🔹 How understanding your own design could support your recovery journey Kathi has also created a research project exploring these themes, and we would love for you to contribute by completing this short survey:👉 Survey Link 💬 Connect with Kathi:📷 Instagram: @magic_kathy_official🎙 Systems of Existence Podcast: Listen Here📧 Email: Contact Here If this episode resonates with you, let’s continue the conversation. Message me on Instagram, and let me know your thoughts. You are not alone. 💜

Today’s episode is all about hunger—but not just the tummy-rumbling kind! If you’ve ever felt confused by your hunger cues (or lack of them) during recovery, you’re not alone. I know how tricky it can be to navigate hunger when physical signals are absent, unreliable, or even overwhelming. 💡 Here’s what you'll listen to today: Why hunger signals can disappear or feel all over the place in recovery. How hunger can show up in surprising ways (restless legs, anyone?). Why mental hunger is 100% valid and so important to honour. How structured eating helps your body feel safe again. How hunger changes as your body heals—and why it’s a good sign, even when it feels chaotic. Hunger can feel messy, confusing, and even a little scary, but it’s all part of the recovery process. Whether you’re working with mental hunger, extreme hunger, or no hunger cues at all, this episode is packed with insights to help you trust your body and give it the care it deserves. ✨ A gentle reminder: Every hunger cue—physical, mental, or emotional—is valid. Your body is asking for love and nourishment, and answering that call is a step toward healing. I have a favour to ask. I want to help as many people as I can, so if this episode resonates, please share it with someone who you think might need it. 💌 For more support, visit my website or find me on Instagram for compassionate tips and encouragement. https://juliatrehane.com/ Blog post on extreme hunger: https://juliatrehane.com/navigating-weight-gain-and-extreme-hunger-during-eating-disorder-recovery/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/juliatrehane

Welcome to another inspiring episode of Fly to Freedom! Today, I am thrilled to be joined by the incredible Dr Anita Johnston, a true pioneer in the field of eating disorder recovery. Dr Johnston is a depth psychologist, international speaker, and the author of the transformative book Eating in the Light of the Moon, now available in seven languages. For nearly 40 years, Dr Johnston has been helping individuals understand the deeper emotional and psychological layers of their relationship with food. In this episode, we explore her fascinating approach to decoding the hidden messages in food through metaphor, mythology, and storytelling. The Hidden Language of Food: Dr Johnston explains how the foods we crave or struggle with can hold metaphorical meanings, offering insights into our emotional needs and personal challenges. Resources for Recovery: Discover the free tools Dr Johnston has created, including her Food & Metaphor Guide, designed to help you uncover the messages behind your eating patterns. Supportive Communities and Clinics: Learn about the resources available through her Light of the Moon Café, her online community, and her ʻAi Pono Maui Clinic in Hawaii, which provides a compassionate space for healing. A Legacy of Healing: Hear about Dr Johnston’s remarkable journey as a pioneer in eating disorder recovery, and how her work continues to transform lives around the globe. Dr Anita Johnston’s Website: dranitajohnston.com Online Community: Light of the Moon Café Ai Pono Maui Clinic: aipono.com Free Food & Metaphor Guide: lightofthemooncafe.com/mygift Dr Johnston’s insights into the metaphorical language of food will leave you reflecting on your own relationship with eating and inspire you to explore a deeper understanding of yourself. 💌 Let’s Connect: If this episode resonates with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Message me on Instagram, leave a comment, or share this episode with someone who might benefit from it. Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast to help others discover these meaningful conversations. See you next week! Highlights:Resources Mentioned: