455: Are You Your Own Bottleneck? The Real Reason You’re Not Expanding (Yet)

The part your nervous system plays in getting the "more" you say you want || In this nugget episode, Monica asks one of the most important and powerful questions you’ll face on your feminine leadership journey: “How am I being my own bottleneck?” ... aka how am I holding myself back from what I want? If you’re feeling any sort of resistance in your business, your healing, your relationship, or your expansion… this one could change everything. INSIDE THE EPISODE:👑 How to spot the ways you are subconsciously limiting your growth👑 What most women get wrong about productivity👑 Why your ego is terrified of your next level—and how to lead yourself through it👑 Why “doing more” isn’t the answer (and what actually is)👑 The truth about "doing the work," ROI, and redefining success👑 How nervous system regulation and small shifts in your masculine structure create massive expansion👑 Why community is the most underrated portal to receiving more👑 What it actually means to lead yourself like HER +++++  As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Doors are open for 2026 — HER Year: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=winter_2026 ⇢ Hop on the waitlist — The Immersion: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=immersion-2026 ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/ ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

Plus, a reminder about committing to your desires before the year ends. If you’re having the Christmas of your dreams, amazing. And if you’re not—this is your loving reminder that you still get to show up for yourself and create the holiday you actually want. INSIDE THIS NUGGET:🎄 What to do if you're spending Christmas alone or if this time of year feels especially hard for you🎄 What it means to choose yourself instead of waiting to be chosen🎄 The feminine reframe that helps you enjoy right now🎄 Why your joy doesn’t have to depend on anyone else this year🎄 A nudge to say yes, take up space, book the trip, and create your own magic🎄 How to stay in your feminine even when life feels off +++++  As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Listen to last year's guided Christmas meditation — Episode 412: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/412-how-to-make-this-your-ideal-christmas-a-guided-meditation-for-the-holiday-season ⇢ Doors are open now for 2026 — HER Year: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=winter_2026 ⇢ Grab the Embodiment Manifestation Practice — NYE Bundle: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/nye-bundle?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=nye-bundle-2026 ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/   ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

Spoiler Alert: You don’t have to be fully healed to manifest what you want. In this episode, Monica breaks down one of the most asked questions she gets: “How do I know if I’ve done 'enough' healing to call in more—love, money, confidence, ease?” And, quite frankly, the personal development obsession with “fixing yourself forever” is keeping so many women stuck in a perpetual sense of not-enoughness. A feeling that they must earn their next level by being perfectly regulated, perfectly healed, and perfectly processed. NO, just no. And let’s be honest, staying out of your next level until you’re “fully healed” is just perfectionism. So, if you’ve been stuck in the healing loop or waiting to heal "enough" before taking action, this is likely the wake-up call you didn’t even know you needed. INSIDE THE EPISODE:💫 How to know when you're healed “enough” to move forward💫 Why waiting to be "fully healed" keeps you playing small💫 The difference between healing and expanding (and why both can coexist)💫 Signs you’re avoiding growth by staying in the trauma loop💫 What it really takes to become HER now, not some day in the future💫 The ways that nervous system safety plays into your next level💫 The power of making decisions before you feel ready💫 The actual goal of healing (hint: it’s not perfection) +++++  As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Doors are open for 2026!! (save $600 until December 18th) — HER Year: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=winter_2026 ⇢ Read the email that inspired the episode — "How do I know if I've done 'enough' healing to be ready for expansion?": https://view.flodesk.com/emails/6937300c738149238bc061ff ⇢ Hop on the waitlist — The Immersion: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=immersion-2026 ⇢ Be the first to know when she’s back — Queen Alchemy: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/queen-alchemy?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=qa-16 ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/ ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

Why “go with the flow” feminine energy is making you more anxious (not less) || If you keep swinging between hyper-productive and totally checked out, this episode unpacks the real reason behind your procrastination, emotional overwhelm, and why typical productivity hacks don’t work for women—especially those trying to stay in their feminine.  Inside the episode:🪞 The real difference between masculine and feminine discipline🪞 Why discipline feels triggering or suffocating for many women🪞 How lack of internal structure creates chaos in your mind, emotions, and body🪞 The connection between discipline and rebuilding self-trust🪞 Why feminine discipline requires devotion, not pressure🪞 How your relationship with the masculine impacts your routines🪞 What it means to set boundaries with yourself (and why it matters)🪞 Why women can’t follow rigid routines like men🪞 The role of your intuition and your cycle when it comes to discipline🪞 What feminine leadership actually looks like in everyday life +++++  As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Doors are open for 2026!! (save $600 until December 18th) — HER Year: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=winter_2026   ⇢ Hop on the waitlist — The Immersion: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=immersion-2026   ⇢ Be the first to know when she’s back — Queen Alchemy: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/queen-alchemy?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=qa-16 ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/   ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth   ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory   Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

In this episode, Monica sits down with holistic psychiatrist, NYT bestselling author, and mum of two daughters, Dr. Kelly Brogan, to unpack why so many successful women feel numb, disconnected, anxious, and unfulfilled—even after “achieving the dream life.” They talk about the secret cost of being “high-functioning,” the trauma of over-mothering and over-performing, the truth about antidepressants and emotional suppression, and why reclaiming your feminine is the key to unlocking embodied safety, pleasure, and power. ALSO INSIDE THE CONVERSATION:👄 Why your child doesn’t owe you love, respect, or even a birthday card👄 The difference between performing motherhood vs. embodying it👄 The hidden trauma behind praise, gold stars, and “good girl” parenting👄 How school disconnects kids from their bodies👄 Letting your child say “no”—without losing control👄 Why over-giving is really about feeling safe👄 How overachieving is actually a trauma response👄 The grief of realizing success isn’t true fulfillment👄 Reclaiming your feminine without becoming a tradwife👄 The feminine art of doing less, receiving more, and feeling safe +++++ As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Connect with Dr. Kelly Brogan: https://www.instagram.com/kellybroganmd/ ⇢ Hop on the waitlist — HER Year (2026): https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=winter_2026 ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/ ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

The conversation most people are too scared to have, especially in today’s world… You’re not crazy for wanting to be claimed. You’re not broken for craving to be pushed up against a wall, devoured, and told “𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦” (by a safe man). And today’s episode will explain the fact that you’re definitely not alone in these desires—there’s biology, research, polarity, and lived experience that help explain exactly why women, especially powerful women, crave this level of masculine presence and leadership. INSIDE THE EPISODE:🔥 The primal craving that most women are ashamed to admit🔥 How equality killed polarity (and what to do about it)🔥 The hidden cost of “doing it all” and why your body is begging to let go🔥 How your masculine energy might be training him to stay passive🔥 Why your desire to be dominated is actually a sign of inner safety🔥 The hormonal ripple effect of being in your masculine all day🔥 Embodied submission vs performative femininity🔥 Why men are pulling away (and how you can call them forward)🔥 What you actually need to shift if you want to feel feminine, desired, and turned on again +++++ As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Tune into the free masterclass — How to Have Him Lead You:https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/how-to-have-him-lead-you-masterclass?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=lead-you-mc ⇢ Get your early access ticket now (or join the waitlist) — 2026 The Immersion: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=atlanta-2025 ⇢ Hop on the waitlist — HER Year (2026): https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=winter_2026 ⇢ Listen to the episode — 323: How To Be "Empoweredly Submissive" In Your Relationship, Business, & Manifestations: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/323-how-to-be-empoweredly-submissive-in-your-relationship-business-manifestations-aka-everything-you-need-to-know-about-softening-into-your-feminine-boundaries-and-trauma ⇢ Check the IG Reel on women getting so desperate they’re stealing men’s salads: https://www.instagram.com/p/DRN2_NiD05O/ ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/ ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

Ever feel like no matter how much you try to communicate your needs, your partner just doesn’t “get you?” In today’s episode, Monica dives into what really happens when two people love each other deeply but still can’t seem to meet each other’s emotional needs. Breaking down what causes couples to drift into resentment, the truth about the “50/50” mindset, and how communication rooted in masculine and feminine dynamics can either heal or hurt the polarity in your relationship. More inside today’s episode:🌹 The real reason couples feel misunderstood—even when they’re both trying.🌹 How male and female biology shape the way each experiences emotion🌹 The difference between feminine and masculine communication🌹 What feminine vs masculine communication actually looks like🌹 Navigating miscommunication and differing emotional needs🌹 When it’s time to stop “nagging” and start inviting his leadership🌹 The truth that your partner will never fully understand you (and why that’s okay)🌹 How hyperindependent women can avoid miscommunication with men who want to lead🌹 How men can communicate in a way that makes her melt instead of pissing her off🌹 Real examples of how to repolarize your relationship through communication +++++ As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Lover framework downloadable PDF — https://monicayateshealth.com/products/the-l-o-v-e-r-method%E2%84%A2?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=evergreen ⇢ Get your early access ticket now (or join the waitlist) — 2026 The Immersion: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=atlanta-2025 ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/ ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

A profound conversation we rarely have about men || In today’s episode, we’re joined (for a second time!) by Connor Beaton—founder of ManTalks, author, facilitator, and father of two—to talk about why so many men feel stuck, what most women get wrong about masculinity, and the real reason your partner might not be initiating sex. Whether you’re raising boys, dating one, or married to one, this is what you need to know. They go deeper on:🔥 Why fathers should discipline sons and mothers should discipline daughters—and what happens when that gets flipped🔥 The quiet confusion boys carry when mum tells him how to be a man… and then, is in a relationship with the opposite🔥 The #1 way mums unknowingly emasculate their sons—and what to do instead🔥 Why so many men today are struggling in relationships (and what women can do without turning into their coach)🔥 Why so many “nice guys” are secretly angry, resentful, and sexually shut down🔥 The hidden trauma behind porn addiction, risk aversion, and avoidant behavior in men🔥 How women are confusing standards with unrealistic expectations in dating🔥 What self-sabotage actually is and how it plays out in men’s lives🔥 What a modern male initiation can look like and how to support your sons in theirs🔥 The overlooked reason men pull away emotionally (even when they want to show up)🔥 The difference between helping your man grow… and accidentally mothering him +++++ As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Connect with Connor: https://www.instagram.com/mantalks/ ⇢ Listen to Monica’s recent episode on Conor’s podcast — Why Relationships Can’t be 50/50: https://open.spotify.com/episode/2GWM96tltDJwy3bGs8KQTx?si=fc19ccfbdc1943c6&nd=1&dlsi=bd5180cb55dc4c38 ⇢ Connor’s first episode on Feminine As F*ck back in 2020: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/114-for-men-cacao-convos-with-connor-beaton-shadow-work-sexual-trauma-military-men-and-using-pain-as-your-purpose ⇢ Another podcast episode on the topic of “empowered women and ‘when no man is enough’” (can also search in the podcast directory for more): https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/323-how-to-be-empoweredly-submissive-in-your-relationship-business-manifestations-aka-everything-you-need-to-know-about-softening-into-your-feminine-boundaries-and-trauma ⇢ Get your early access ticket now (or join the waitlist) — 2026 The Immersion: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=atlanta-2025 ⇢ Men, start your healing journey inside — The Man: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/the-man ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/ ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

Why your success, control, and mental load are killing polarity (and what to do about it) || In this episode, Monica unpacks the root causes of burnout in hyper-successful women—not just the exhaustion, but the nervous system patterns that drive it. She unpacks how chronic over-achieving, mental load, and a refusal to ask for help become blocks that impact your health, your business, and your relationship.  From nervous system dysregulation to running the entire household while still expecting him to lead, this conversation exposes what’s actually keeping you stuck in your masculine, and why your current version of “success” might be the very thing disconnecting you from your feminine, your man, and your peace. More inside the episode:🔥The dangers of only resting and slowing down when you’re sick🔥The invisible weight of mental load and learning to actually ask for help🔥How rest can be productive and why it’s essential for sustainable success🔥What you’re really making “asking for help” mean about you🔥Building systems that hold you at home, in business, in life🔥The obsession with being “high-value” and how it’s showing up in dating🔥Why embracing your softness doesn’t make you less capable🔥The ways you’re blocking your man from leading without knowing it🔥Monica’s wedding vows to Hal and how they reflect true partnership +++++  As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Listen to the episode — 256: How to be a feminine woman that's also a highly successful one:https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/256-how-to-be-a-feminine-woman-thats-also-a-highly-successful-one  ⇢ Hit play on episode — 444: October Theory: How to Quantum Leap and Become HER by the End of the Year:https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/444-october-theory-how-to-quantum-leap-and-become-her-by-the-end-of-the-year  ⇢ Binge the relationship & dating episodes here —https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/tagged/relationships-polarity  ⇢ Dive inside  — The Embodiment of Dating Masterclass:https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/the-embodiment-of-dating?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=evergreen_general  ⇢ Don’t miss out on any updates for  — HER Year:https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=waitlist-2025  ⇢ Hop on the waitlist for — The Immersion:https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=atlanta-2025  ⇢ Join the waitlist for — Queen Alchemy:https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/queen-alchemy?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=qa-16  ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER:https://www.becomingherbook.com/  ⇢ Monica’s Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth  ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory:https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory  Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer

In this episode, Monica gives you the real truth about coming back to work post-baby, navigating mum life, and why her business feels more on fire than ever. If you’re a high-achieving woman who wants to be a mother (or already is) without losing herself, this will show you what’s actually possible when you’re prepared, supported, and resourced from inside out. What she goes inside the episode:☀️ A sneak peek BTS of what it’s been like returning to work after maternity leave☀️ The dance between being a mum and a business owner☀️ What shifted in Monica’s business, her boundaries, and her self-worth post-baby☀️ Why this season feels more expansive than ever☀️ Embracing surrender and flexibility in calling your manifestation☀️ The importance of masculine structure in all areas of your life☀️ Healing and preparation for motherhood☀️ Why your self-care is no longer optional, especially as a mum☀️ Practical examples of being resourceful in asking and receiving help during motherhood☀️ How healing before major life transitions changes the entire experience☀️ Letting go of the pressure to be “understood” by your man☀️The truth about postpartum rage, broken toes, spit-up in team meetings, and how Monica is choosing JOY in all of it +++++ As Mentioned In The Episode: ⇢ Listen to the episode — 418: Manifesting Your Man, Turning Up the Polarity & Breaking Through Your “Zones”: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/podcast/418-manifesting-your-man-turning-up-the-polarity-breaking-through-your-zones ⇢ Shop Monica's top picks — CYMBIOTIKA Natural & Organic Supplements: https://partners.cymbiotika.com/MONICAYATESHEALTH ⇢ Watch the episode — Our Conception Story | Everything We Did to Prepare and Boost Fertility: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3utoG7TTVII⇢ Watch the episode — Birth Q&A: All Things Home Birth, Pain Relief, Practitioners, and Preparing Your Man: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvuWb291D-g⇢ Don’t miss out on any updates for — HER Year: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/her-year-mastermind?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=waitlist-2025 ⇢ Hop on the waitlist for — The Immersion: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/immersion?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=atlanta-2025 ⇢ Join the waitlist for — Queen Alchemy: https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/queen-alchemy?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=qa-16 ⇢ Order the BOOK — Becoming HER: https://www.becomingherbook.com/ ⇢ Monica’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monicayateshealth ⇢ Full, SEARCHABLE Podcast Directory: https://monicayateshealth.com/blogs/feminine-as-f-ck-podcast/podcast-directory Remember to leave a written review on Apple Podcasts, screenshot it before you submit it, and email it to us at [email protected] to receive an exclusive meditation track as a 'thank you' from Monica. This podcast and its content is copyright of Monica Yates Health © and Feminine as F*ck ©. All rights reserved. || https://monicayateshealth.com/pages/copyright-disclaimer