The Truth About Lying in Addiction & Relationships

In this latest episode on Conversations on Sex Addiction and Relationships, the team dives into a tough but essential question: Why do addicts lie and are they even aware they’re doing it?   Tim Stein, Dan Drake, and Wendy Conquest, unpack how lying often starts as an early survival strategy rooted in trauma, where being fully authentic didn’t feel safe. Over time, this evolves into patterns of denial, omission, and “motivated reasoning,” where the brain unconsciously twists reality to avoid discomfort, conflict, or shame. The hosts explore why even small lies can deeply damage trust, how ongoing dishonesty erodes relationships more than the truth itself, and what it actually takes to rebuild honesty in recovery. If you’ve ever struggled to understand dishonesty in addiction or felt the impact of it in a relationship, this episode offers real insight and clarity.   Listen or watch the full episode on Conversations Podcast, and don’t forget to follow and share to help others find these conversations.

What counts as an emotional affair? In this episode of Conversations on Sex Addiction and Relationships, Wendy Conquest, Tim Stein, Jeanne Vattuone, and Dan Drake unpack emotional affairs. How they begin, and why they can be deeply painful even without physical cheating. The conversation will look at how emotional affairs can blur lines through texting, personal disclosure, and unmet emotional needs, especially when someone starts turning outside their primary relationship for support or intimacy. If you’re wondering whether a connection has crossed the line, this episode offers practical insight into emotional infidelity, trust, and how to respond with honesty and accountability. Listen now on all podcast platforms and subscribe for new episodes.

What does it really mean to be a sex addict? In this episode of Conversations on Sex Addiction and Relationships, hosts Tim Stein, Jeanne Vattuone, and Wendy Conquest unpack the confusion around sexual compulsivity, pornography use, betrayal trauma, and intimacy issues. They explore how to tell the difference between normal sexual behavior and addiction, what red flags to look for, and how shame, secrecy, and early exposure to sexual material can shape lifelong patterns. Join the discussion about anxiety, coping, trauma, and the healing power of self-awareness and recovery. Whether you’re questioning your own behavior or supporting a loved one, this episode offers grounded insight from certified sex addiction therapists (CSATs).

When someone is caught in the cycle of sex addiction, it can appear that their only value is acting out in the addiction itself. But beneath the surface lies something much deeper. In this episode on Conversations on Sex Addiction and Relationships, Tim Stein, Wendy Conquest, and Dan Drake unpack what values really mean in sex addiction recovery. They explore the disconnect between what addicts say they value, like connection, honesty, and loyalty, and the behaviors that often contradict those beliefs. Together, they examine how trauma shapes values, why autonomy and intimacy can feel unsafe, and how recovery offers a path to realignment moving from “I value” to “I want to value.” Drawing from their clinical experience, the hosts discuss how humility, awareness, and action help recovering addicts not just define their values, but live them authentically.

In this mailbag episode 'The High-Functioning Addicts' on Conversations Podcast, Wendy Conquest, Tim Stein, and Dan Drake tackle a listener’s question about “high-functioning” sex addicts. These are people who appear to have everything under control yet still find themselves in patterns of secrecy, betrayal, and shame. What happens when addiction wears the disguise of success? The Conversations Podcast hosts explore the subtle defenses that protect the illusion of control, the difference between compulsivity and authenticity, and why recovery work can be transformative even for those who don’t see themselves as “out of control.” Join the conversation as they discuss denial, ego, and the quiet chaos that lies beneath the surface of the “high-functioning” addict’s life and how true freedom may begin with humility and honest self-reflection.   #transformational #addictionrecovery #selfreflection #authenticity #betrayal 

Conversations Podcast hosts - Wendy Conquest, Dan Drake, and Tim Stein sit down to name the everyday dynamics that quietly erode even committed relationships. They move beyond sex addiction to look at what harms connection in “ordinary” couples: assumptions and misattunement, the numbing presence of smartphones, the difference between healthy anger and aggression, dishonesty and lack of authenticity, and the pull of fantasy over reality. Using concepts like the “three H’s” (Do you want to be Helped, Heard, or Held?), love languages, and attunement, they offer practical scripts and questions partners can use in real time to reconnect instead of disconnect. They also explore how AI, social media, and cultural pressures make it harder to show up honestly and what it looks like to practice mindful “etiquette” so honesty doesn’t become brutality. If you’ve ever wondered why your relationship feels stuck, distant, or “off” even without obvious betrayal, this conversation offers a clear, compassionate roadmap back to emotional and physical intimacy. Subscribe to Conversations on Sex, Addiction & Relationships today to watch their latest episode!

Betrayal shatters your world. Can you find a way to be brave and heal? Join Jeanne Vattuone, Wendy Conquest and Dan Drake as they speak with this week's Podcast Guest, Tammy Gustafson, on Conversations. Tammy unveils her 6-year journey writing Broken to Brave, sharing her four phases of healing after intimate betrayal. From dysregulated nervous systems to demystifying the path forward, this episode offers betrayed partners clear guideposts, honest hope, and proof that thriving is possible. Available now on all podcast platforms and YouTube.

When does simply noticing someone cross into objectifying them? In this thought-provoking conversation, Wendy Conquest, Jeanne Vattuone, and Dan Drake unpack the difference between normal human noticing and objectification — a key theme in recovery and relationships. They explore questions like: - Can someone in recovery notice someone’s attractiveness without crossing a boundary? - How can betrayed partners feel safe in a world full of triggers? - What role do stress, self-awareness, and truth-telling play in keeping connection alive? Join us for an honest look at human nature, recovery, and rebuilding trust. Available on all podcast platforms and subscribe on YouTube.

Technology has transformed nearly every part of modern life from how we work and communicate to how we seek comfort, connection, and even therapy. But as it continues to simplify daily tasks and free up time, a deeper question emerges: what do we choose to do with that time? In today’s episode, we explore the double-edged nature of technology, its potential to connect us, and its power to isolate us. They discuss how digital tools have reshaped connection, mental health, and even addiction, especially in a world that’s increasingly online. Together, the panel reflects on: - How technology shapes emotional connection and loneliness - The rise of technology and gaming addiction - How to find balance between digital tools and real human interaction This conversation offers a thoughtful look at how to stay grounded, intentional, and human in an age of constant screens and virtual communication.

Is secrecy a core part of pornography addiction — or just one possible sign of a deeper struggle? In today’s episode, we explore the complex intersection between porn use, shame, secrecy, and addiction. They unpack what “problematic use” really means, why some people hide their behavior while others don’t, and how early experiences and family culture can shape an individual’s understanding of sexuality and self-control. Together, the panel discusses: - Why secrecy may (or may not) signal addiction - The connection between shame, secrecy, and self-judgment - How upbringing and normalization influence behavior - What “average” porn use really means — and when it becomes harmful - How to identify the difference between use, misuse, and addiction This conversation is for anyone seeking clarity, education, and compassion around pornography use and its psychological impact. It’s not about judgment — it’s about understanding the patterns that lead to distress, disconnection, or harm.