Episode #104: Introducing a new partner after divorce or separation

In this episode, Kate is joined by former family barrister turned therapist and author, Charlotte Friedman. About the episodeThe focus of this episode is loneliness. Kate and Charlotte begin by exploring what loneliness is, whether it’s a physical or mental feeling or both, and how loneliness links to grief, as well as the emotional journey of divorce and separation. They discuss seeking professional help and how children and other family members can sense and react to loneliness. Finally, Charlotte and Kate discuss coping mechanisms for loneliness, especially post-separation.About the guestCharlotte decided to move from the courtroom to the therapist’s chair to help people manage the emotional journey of divorce. In her book, Breaking Upwards, Charlotte offers calm, therapeutic advice on everything from managing loneliness to letting go of grievance. Charlotte is a trained Psychodynamic Psychotherapist registered with the British Psychoanalytic Council and the Tavistock Society. She is also the founder of the Divorce Support Group which has provided a community for people trying to manage the emotional impact of divorce and separation.

In this episode, Kate is joined by clinical psychologist, Angharad Rudkin, and solicitor, mediator, and campaigner Helen Adam. About the episode Kate and Helen begin the episode by discussing the Family Solutions Group (FSG) and explaining the Right to Matter report. They move on to discuss who in Government currently takes responsibility for children when parents separate. Helen explores some of the consultations' findings as well as the common questions that emerged from the UK Youth Parliament. Later on in the episode, Kate and Angharad discuss how children and families are impacted during parental separation, whether divorce or separation impacts children’s mental health and to what extent. Also, they explore what this can look like day-to-day and what the key factors are that lead to significant impact. Finally, Helen and Adam give their recommendations for further help and advice and the next steps for future reports and actions on the level of government.About the guestsHelen Adam started her work with separating families as a solicitor in London. Following a career break, she retrained as a mediator and founded Wells Family Mediation. Helen is also chair of the Family Solutions Group (FSG). The FSG presses for coordinated political oversight and funding for separated families. We’ve previously recorded an episode on language with Helen, so make sure to have a listen. Dr Angharad Rudkin is a clinical psychologist with over 20 years experience of working with children and families to discuss divorce and separation from the perspective of children.Angharad is also an expert for the Metro's relationship column, offers training and consultation for family lawyers and worked as a lecturer on the Clinical Psychology doctorate at the University of Southampton for 12 years.Angharad was a consulting editor for ‘101 Questions Answered about Separating with Children’ and has recently published a book for children on how to cope with their parent’s divorce, The Split Survival Kit, written with children’s author Ruth Fitzgerald. We’ve also recorded an episode with Angharad in the past which is number 57 if you would like to have a listen.For help and advice with divorce, separation, co-parenting or anything related to these, please visit: amicable.co.uk

In this episode, Kate is joined by clinical therapist and manager, Julie Cooper, to discuss the reality of co-parenting across the varying stages of childhood.About the guestJulie is a lead provider of mental health services at Honey for Moms, in Ferndale, Michigan. She is a Co-parenting specialist and single mum of two and has dedicated her career to helping parents throughout their co-parenting journey. As a mother moving through divorce, Julie’s personal experience of co-parenting highlighted the need for a stronger support system, clearer information and dependable resources. Her journey along this path drove her to believe that, regardless of marital status, raising secure children who feel seen, heard, and loved by both parents, is possible with the right tools and support. Julie's tenured work in mental health has led her to become a strong clinician, leader, and advocate for mental health. She also has a passion for helping individuals with trauma, anxiety, depression, and low self-worth. As team lead in her practice, Julie is deeply committed to providing professional guidance and furthering education in this field.About the episodeThroughout this episode, Kate and Julie move through the different stages of childhood, highlighting the most important considerations when moving into a co-parenting family structure. They look at separating when children are babies, toddlers, young children, teenagers and finally, children as they grow up and the signs and changes you may have to look out for, as well as signposting the available help. 

In this episode, Kate was joined by Professor Lisa Doodson and Rebecca Jones from amicable to discuss introducing new partners and navigating blended families. Meet our guestsLisa is a chartered psychologist and founder of HappySteps, a consultancy providing training and advice to professionals and families directly.  As an expert in the field, Lisa frequently contributes to TV documentaries and comments in the press. Rebecca, or Bec, is a divorce specialist at amicable and was previously a family solicitor. Bec has also been through her own divorce and now has a blended family. About this episodeThis episode is full of tips about introducing new partners and general advice on blended families. We look at some of the unique challenges that each presents, as well as the potential benefits of growing up in a blended family. Lisa provides insightful advice about coping with different parenting styles, as well as tips on establishing house rules. Bec gives many tips on practical things families can do to make the journey smoother, based on her experience. This episode is a real homage to the idea that families come in all shapes and sizes and there's no ‘right’ way to parent your kids, highlighting the fact that respect and communication are the foundations for a happy blended family.  

In this episode, Kate was joined by Mark Groves, a Human Connection Specialist and founder of 'Create the Love', to discuss co-dependency in relationships, separation and divorce.  About the guestMark's separation from his ex-partner sparked his journey to turn his experiences into an impactful message. Mark founded Create The Love, a platform that guides people to design the life and love they long for, following on from his rock bottom when his relationship ended. He hosts The Mark Groves Podcast and has a significant following on social media where he shares his insight into relationships. Today, Mark is a human connection specialist, speaker, writer, motivator, creator, connector and collaborator. As a bridge between the academic and the human, Mark invites people to explore the good, bad, downright ugly, and beautiful sides of connection.  Mark is a friend of the podcast and this is his second appearance; you can check out Mark's previous episode here.Kate and Mark begin the episode by exploring how co-dependency can manifest in romantic and other personal relationships. They look at the link between codependency and addiction, as well as whether a codependent relationship can ever be healthy. During the episode, they talk about ending a codependent relationship and how fear is a driver for couples staying together in unhealthy and unhappy relationships. Finally, Mark and Kate end the episode by discussing the role of boundaries in healing co-dependency and co-parenting. 

In this episode, Kate is joined by founder and Master Divorce Coach, Louise Neville, to discuss surviving the family court.Louise founded the company Family Court Survival and supports people emotionally, practically and strategically through the Family Court System In England and Wales. She is a Master Divorce Coach and Professional McKenzie Friend who works in children’s welfare and is at the forefront of everything she does. Kate and Louise begin this episode by exploring what we mean by the family court. Louise explains how she ended up there after separating from her husband over unresolved financial and child arrangement issues. This episode is focused on helping people navigate the family court when they have no other choice.   Louise’s detailed explanation of the process for Children Act proceedings is useful in understanding what’s involved if you end up in a dispute when you separate.Trigger Warning: This episode covers content that some listeners might find distressing including poor mental health and abuse.Organisations who can help:Dads UnlimitedYour local GPMind - mental health charitySamaritans - dial 116 123 or text SHOUT to 85258YoungMinds Crisis Messenger – for people under 19Is your life in danger? - dial 999Outside of the UK? Search for help here

In this episode, Kate was joined by Ella Kenion to talk about her experience of divorce and co-parenting. Ella spoke candidly about her two divorces, the first being the pinnacle of ‘amicable’ and the second being far from it. They also explore her co-parenting journey. About the guest: Ella has enjoyed a long and varied career as an actress, working successfully across both stage and screen for many years., with highlights including the BBC’s The Outlaws, Doctors, and The Detectorists, ITV’s Midsomer Murders and the feature film The Night before Christmas. Television credits include: Beyond Paradise (BritBox), So Awkward: Kids Camp (BBC), The Outlaws (BBC), Honour (ITV), The Barking Murders (ITV), The Duchess (Netflix), Shakespeare & Hathaway (BBC), Doctors (BBC), Pure (Channel 4), Warren (BBC), Kiss of Death (Discovery), Midsomer Murders (ITV), The Detectorists (BBC), Episodes (Showtime), Swashbuckle (CBBC), New Tricks (BBC), Justin's House (CBBC), Big Bad World (Comedy Central), Law & Order UK (Kudos), Cuckoo (BBC), Heading Out (BBC), Hollyoaks (Channel 4), Doctor Who (BBC), Fun Police (Channel 4), Gates (Sky), Criminal Justice (BBC), Gayle Tuesday: The Comeback (Living TV), Holby City (BBC). Theatre credits include: Dusty (Theatre Royal Bath), Ghosting the Party (NT Company), Emil & The Detectives (National Theatre), The School for Scandal (The Comedians Theatre Company), Shooting Star (Chester Gateway Theatre), Private Lives (Watford Palace Theatre), Gift of the Gorgon (Royal Shakespeare Company) Film credits include: The Offenders (Big Talk), The Knight Before Christmas (HP Christmas Knight Productions), Stan & Ollie (Fable Pictures). TW: This episode mentions abusive behaviour. Some listeners may find the information and topics discussed distressing. Useful links/ charities:Surviving Economic AbuseDashRefugeMen's Advice Line

To celebrate this special occasion, we're taking a trip down memory lane and bringing you the absolute best bits from our most impactful and insightful episodes. Tune in as we delve into various topics including the emotional journey, co-parenting and children, and finances on divorce. We'll touch on finding your inner strength, co-parenting with grace, rebuilding your life, and embracing personal growth. Our guests will share their expertise, stories, and advice, creating a space for understanding and support.About the guests (In order of appearance):Jessica Fostekew: comedian, actor and writerIn 2019, Jess was nominated for The Dave Edinburgh Comedy Award ‘Best Show’ for her show Wench. She's the co-writer and co-star of the forthcoming Sky special 'Real Friends' and her series 'Sturdy Girl Club' is now on BBC Sounds. Ed Bassett: well-being entrepreneur, Dad, and rugby fanFather of two, Ed is involved in several not-for-profit companies, an Ambassador for Staffordshire, a start-up mentor and a passionate believer in finding your voice and speaking your truth.The Midlife Mentors, Claire and James DavisClaire and James Davis are the husband-and-wife team behind the multi-award-winning well-being company 38 Degrees North and the thriving midlife coaching business, The Midlife Mentors. Dr Angharad Rudkin: clinical psychologist Dr Angharad Rudkin a clinical psychologist with over 20 years experience of working with children and families to discuss divorce from the perspective of children.  Marcie Shaoul: Director of The Co-Parent WayMarcie is the Director of The Co-Parent Way, the UK’s only Co-Parent Coaching Practice. She is responsible for developing a unique coaching methodology that enables parents to co-parent together effectively after separation.Christina McGhee: internationally recognised divorce parenting expertWith over 25 years of experience, Christina has been featured across television, radio and podcasts including The Times, Channel 4 and the BBC.Louise Oliver: financial plannerLouise has worked in the financial services sector for over 30 years and is a Certified Financial Planner and a Chartered Wealth Manager.Daniel Copley: consumer expert at ZooplaDan is an editor with over 10 years of experience in the property, lifestyle and fashion sectors.Shreepali Chauhan-Tufail: Divorce Specialist at amicableShreepali is a former Solicitor with over 20 years of experience in Dispute Resolution, Family and Commercial law. Joshua Rozenberg: the UK’s most experienced legal commentatorJoshua Rozenberg KC (hon) is Britain's most experienced full-time legal commentator. He is the only journalist to have been appointed as Queen's Counsel honoris causa. David Hodson: solicitor, mediator, arbitratorProf David Hodson OBE KC(Hons) MCIArb is a co-founder partner of The International Family Law Group, which works with international families and their children.

In this episode, Kate was joined by Dr. Charlotte Fox Weber to talk about boundaries, relationships, and separation. This episode focuses on what we mean by boundaries and explores how we can use them in the context of relationships, separation, and divorce.   About the guest:Charlotte is a psychotherapist and writer. She co-founded ‘Examined Life’ and is the founding head of ‘The School of Life Psychotherapy’. She grew up in Connecticut and Paris and now lives in London with her husband and two young children and ‘Tell Me What You Want’ is her first book. She's writing her second book about why we hold onto hurtful relationships.She is registered and accredited by the UK Council for Psychotherapy (UKCP) and a registered member of the British Association of Counselling & Psychotherapy (MBACP). Charlotte founded The School of Life Psychotherapy in 2015, and now works in private practice. She is also a trustee on the board of the Josef and Anni Albers Foundation and works with Le Korsa, running educational programs with women in Senegal. 

In this episode, Kate was joined by Zoë Desmond and Rebecca Cox to talk about their brand new book ‘How to be a happy single parent’. They start the episode by talking about why Zoë created Frolo and how she got to know Rebecca in the process. Zoë and Rebecca discuss their stories of becoming single parents and the challenges associated with raising children on your own. They explore their new book as well as some of the chapters, including those that focus on boundaries, the emotional side, and what it means to be a single parentAbout the guests: Rebecca Cox is a single mother and founder of The Single Mother Edit. She is a journalist whose writing has been published by Elle, Glamour, Country & Town House, Vogue.com and more. Her pieces on single motherhood have been featured in publications, including The Evening Standard, Grazia and Harper's Bazaar.Zoë Desmond is a single mum and the Founder of Frolo, the award-winning app and community for single parents. Both Zoe and Rebecca are the author’s of the brand new book, ‘How to be a happy single parent’.You can buy a copy of  ‘How to be a happy single parent’ by clicking on the link.