How to Control Your Thoughts

Emilia can’t stop thinking about a long-ago love affair with Ivan, a man she met in Mexico in her early 20s and dated for several years. Now, a decade later, Emilia is newly married, but thoughts of her time with Ivan pop into her mind daily, a fact she’s never shared with her husband. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Ethan Kross, a psychology professor at the University of Michigan and the author of Chatter: The Voice In Our Head, Why It Matters, and How To Harness It. Whether thinking about a past experience or worrying about the present, we all get stuck in negative cycles of thought, and Ethan has the tools to help us form a better relationship with our thoughts. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Lauren and Carlos are afraid their marriage is at a breaking point. With Carlos out of work, an active toddler to care for, and another child on the way, Lauren and Carlos are feeling pressures familiar to many newlyweds—and the pandemic has only made it worse. Can we help this couple find their way back to each other? On this episode of How To!, we bring on John and Julie Gottman, who are not only co-founders of The Gottman Institute and co-authors of Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, but also have been married to each other for more than three decades. They help Lauren and Carlos begin to heal their relationship with tips that can apply to all couples. For starters, you are not your partner’s therapist, Julie says. Looking for patterns in their behavior will only drive you further away from understanding each other. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Is there a right way to let kids struggle and fail? How do you raise resilient children? And most important, when should you help out, and when should you chill out? We ask Wendy Mogel, author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee to advise a Portland, Oregon, couple who worry about their son becoming upset when he gets wet in a squirt-gun fight. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Sophie Power once breastfed her newborn during an ultramarathon, but an upcoming 268-mile race across a remote stretch of Great Britain is freaking her out. We turn to Wim Hof, aka "The Iceman," for advice. Because when you are worried about pain, you should definitely consult a Dutch extreme athlete who sits in freezing water for fun. (Really!) This is a great episode for anyone who is scared up taking up a running habit, or any other exercise (or who just loves hearing about how to withstand pain). Enjoy! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Matt has anxiety attacks. Every day. When he gets too many texts, when he starts worrying about his family, when the unexpected occurs—that’s when the sweat starts and his mind begins racing. He’s a strong guy—he was a cop—but he thinks today’s problem is connected to a tragic event in the past, and he doesn’t know what to do. We introduce him to Ben Michaelis, a clinical psychologist and habit expert, to help Matt figure out what’s triggering his anxiety attacks and how he can get back control over his head—and his life. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ben, also know as "Sleepless in San Francisco" hasn't been able to get a good night's rest for over a decade. He's tried noise machines, medication, vodka, even eating cheese -- but nothing has worked. In this episode of How To!, we bring in Andy Puddicombe, a former Buddhist monk and co-founder of the meditation app Headspace, to help Ben hit the hay. Plus, some new information from the frontiers of sleep from your host, Charles Duhigg! Learn more about Sleep at Charles Duhigg's newsletter, The Science of Better! You can find it here: https://charlesduhigg.substack.com/p/the-science-of-sleep-how-to-slay Do you have a burning question or a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected]. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Jami's dealt with chronic knee instability and dislocations since childhood, two major surgeries, years of tedious rehab. Now she wants to actually trust her body again before starting a family, not just tolerate it. She talks to Tom Morrison, a mobility coach who thinks most people rehab wrong: too much isolating single muscles in a gym, not enough moving joints through their full range the way real life demands. His fix is almost annoyingly simple, five minutes a day, household stairs, some deliberate fidgeting, nothing that looks like a workout. He also digs into why recovering athletes sabotage themselves without realizing it, pushing hard in the gym while skipping the boring daily movement that's actually doing the real work. Click Here to learn more about Tom Morrison Executive Producer Corey Wara Edited by Geoff Craig Booking by Ben Astaire Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Amateur cyclist and university associate professor Wendy loves riding her bike with her young son and local road group, but aggressive drivers, close calls, and a deep-seated hostility toward cyclists leave her fearing for their safety on the road. Enter Meredith Glaser, CEO of the Urban Cycling Institute and professor of cycling at Ghent University, who advocates for shifting away from defensive cycling culture and toward treating bikes as everyday appliances rather than radical political statements. She introduces Wendy to the power of temporary "street experiments" and community-led initiatives like the "bicibus" or "kidical mass," advising her to leverage grassroots momentum, youth health messaging, and local allies (including cycling police officers) to reclaim public streets, foster safer road habits, and normalize bike transit without getting bogged down in municipal bureaucracy. Meredith Glaser is the CEO of the Urban Cycling Institute and a leading expert on human-scale mobility. Head over to urbancyclinginstitute.org to learn more. They also have a substack - Urban Cycling Institute | Substack Executive Producer Corey Wara Edited by Geoff Craig Booking by Ben Astaire Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at [email protected] and we will consider your topic for the show. For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/ Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Last week, our expert Arthur Brooks gave us some surefire advice for resetting the parent-child relationship so your kids don't treat you like an emotional ATM. On this episode of How To!, he's going to teach our listener, Karen, how to balance the books, so to speak, by taking some withdrawals of her own. He has some surprising tips for how to restrain yourself from swooping in to save the day when it would be better to let them figure it out. Starting with a hilarious story of the time Arthur's adult son called him—pantsless—from Las Vegas. If you liked this episode, check out part one: "How To Parent Less." Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Executive Producer Corey Wara Edited by Geoff Craig Booking by Ben Astaire Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at [email protected] and we will consider your topic for the show. For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/ Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Today on How To!, Freddy, a physician, scientist, and father, struggles with how to mentor his 12-year-old daughter, who prefers her safe comfort zone and strongly resists new experiences, travel, or unfamiliar foods. Host Mike Pesca brings on stand-up comedian and Parenting is a Joke podcast host Ophira Eisenberg to discuss strategies for nudging risk-averse kids to embrace uncertainty without overwhelming them. They explore why today's deluge of technology and abundance creates unique parenting hurdles, how to gamify trying new things, and the shift away from gentle parenting toward tougher love approaches like "FAFO." Plus, is pushing kids outside their comfort zone the key to preparing them for an unpredictable future, or should parents learn to accept their child's natural boundaries? Executive Producer Corey Wara Edited by Geoff Craig Booking by Ben Astaire Do you have a burning question or a problem you need help with? Email us at [email protected] and we will consider your topic for the show. For full Pesca content and updates, check out our website at https://www.mikepesca.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To receive ad-free content, become a Pesca Plus subscriber at ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://subscribe.mikepesca.com/ For Mike's daily takes on Substack, subscribe to The Gist List https://mikepesca.substack.com/ Follow us on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/pescagist/ X https://x.com/pescami YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@pescagist⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@pescagist To advertise on the show, contact ⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠ or visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://advertising.libsyn.com/howto Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.