SuperLife with Darin Olien podcast

Brandon Jenner: What Becoming a Father Forced Me to Finally Face About My Childhood

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What happens when the two things you love most seem to demand completely different versions of you?

In this deeply personal conversation, Darin sits down with his longtime friend, musician and father of four Brandon Jenner to explore the tension between showing up fully for your family and honoring the creative part of yourself that still needs space to exist. After years in which fatherhood became the centerpiece of his life, Brandon recently carved out three intense months to record a ten-song album in his home studio.

Brandon opens up about the reality of raising four children, including twin boys, and the constant feeling that there are more balls in the air than any parent can possibly catch. He shares how becoming a father forced him to confront parts of his own childhood, including the emotions that surfaced when his sons reached the age he was when his own father stopped being consistently present.

The conversation expands into creativity, vulnerability, regret, family relationships, and legacy. Darin shares the powerful story of discovering unmarked cassette tapes of his late father singing while cleaning out his mother's home after her death. That discovery creates a new perspective for Brandon: the music he makes isn't taking something away from his children. It's also leaving them a piece of their father they may carry for the rest of their lives.

Together, Darin and Brandon explore what it means to stop filtering yourself through other people's opinions, repair relationships before it's too late, transform regret into wisdom, and give the people you love permission to see who you really are.

What You'll Learn

  • How Brandon balances being a father of four with the need to create
  • Why he recorded an entire ten-song album in only three months
  • How becoming a parent brought unresolved parts of Brandon's childhood back to the surface
  • Why boredom, silence, and daydreaming can be essential ingredients for creativity
  • How songwriting became a deeply therapeutic form of emotional expression
  • Why vulnerability is at the center of the music Brandon wants to create
  • How the art you make can become part of the legacy your children inherit
  • Why Darin believes unresolved tension in relationships should be addressed immediately
  • How Brandon thinks about regret and his past marijuana use
  • Why authentic self-expression matters more than filtering yourself through other people's opinions

Chapters

00:00:02 – Welcome to SuperLife

00:00:32 – Sponsor: Fatty15

00:04:12 – Introducing Brandon Jenner

00:05:47 – Inside the studio where Brandon created his new album

00:06:36 – Making a ten-song record in only three months

00:07:12 – The tension between fatherhood and being an artist

00:08:19 – The moment Brandon decided it was finally time to create

00:09:01 – How not wanting to let people down has shaped Brandon's life

00:09:37 – Why parenthood has defined the last decade

00:10:28 – Four kids and constantly feeling like you're dropping a ball

00:11:09 – Why creativity requires boredom, silence, and space

00:12:36 – Finding joy through service to others

00:13:06 – There is never a perfect time to create

00:14:35 – Why your children also need to see you pursue what you love

00:15:14 – When Brandon's sons reached the age he stopped seeing his father

00:16:14 – Daydreaming as a creative superpower

00:17:38 – Asking his wife for the space to disappear creatively

00:18:37 – Sponsor: Shakeology

00:20:24 – Making an album is like going out to sea

00:21:05 – Why albums still matter in an eight-second-attention world

00:22:16 – Songwriting as therapy

00:23:05 – Creating from feeling instead of analysis

00:24:13 – The story hidden behind every lyric

00:25:37 – Music as a transmission of emotion

00:26:33 – How songs help us process experiences we can't explain

00:27:21 – Why vulnerability makes music powerful

00:28:20 – The unique energetic fingerprint of every artist

00:29:27 – Darin discovers recordings of his late father

00:30:19 – Hearing his father's voice after losing his mother

00:31:14 – Grief, music, memory, and emotional release

00:32:26 – Why Brandon may have needed to make this album now

00:33:30 – Creativity as something Brandon did for himself

00:33:57 – Entering the creative flow state

00:35:27 – The moments that become permanently etched into our lives

00:36:18 – How music transcended Darin's parents' difficult history

00:36:57 – Sharing his father's voice with siblings who barely knew him

00:38:23 – The art you create becomes part of your children's inheritance

00:39:32 – Music, vulnerability, and legacy

00:40:27 – What Brandon's children will remember about making this album

00:41:37 – What Darin wishes he'd done differently before losing his mom

00:42:56 – The conversations that changed Darin's family before his mother's death

00:44:26 – Don't wait to repair the relationships that matter

00:45:08 – Take off the masks and tell people how you really feel

00:46:14 – How tiny unresolved conflicts become separation

00:47:13 – Breaking the roles we unconsciously play inside our families

00:48:12 – Why honesty is often hardest with the people closest to us

00:49:58 – Grief, siblings, and preparing relationships before loss

00:51:22 – Parenthood goes faster than you think

00:52:01 – What will actually matter when you look back?

00:53:32 – The truth about regret

00:54:31 – Turning past choices into awareness

00:55:32 – Darin on continuing to feel his parents after their deaths

00:56:21 – Looking back at the roads you didn't take

00:58:08 – Brandon's regret about smoking marijuana when he was young

00:59:17 – Turning regret into something useful

01:00:18 – Quitting marijuana and what Brandon wants his children to learn

01:00:42 – How people can hear Brandon's new music

01:01:08 – What happened to the traditional music business

01:02:18 – Why streaming changed the economics of being an artist

01:03:10 – Technology made music more democratic

01:04:04 – Why artists no longer need permission from the industry

01:04:51 – Social media's enormous influence on music today

01:05:35 – Adapting instead of complaining about a changing industry

01:05:59 – Brandon's strategy for sharing the meaning behind his songs

01:06:47 – Stop filtering yourself through other people's opinions

01:07:27 – The courage to say what you actually mean

01:08:06 – Teaching his children that creativity is a safe space

01:08:46 – Why music gives us permission to be completely vulnerable

01:09:38 – Teaching children to express what they're really feeling

01:10:26 – Brandon reflects on Darin's discipline and commitment

01:11:27 – Friendship, support, and walking the walk

01:12:25 – The beautiful insanity of raising twin boys

01:13:11 – Brandon's album, fatherhood, and final thoughts

Thank You to Our Sponsors:

  • Fatty15: Get an additional 15% off their 90-day subscription Starter Kit by going to fatty15.com/DARIN and using code DARIN at checkout.

  • Shakeology: Get 15% off with code DARINO1BODI at Shakeology.com.

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Key Takeaway

"Showing up for the people you love doesn't require erasing the parts of yourself that make you who you are. Your children don't only need your time. They need to see your passion, your creativity, your vulnerability, and your willingness to express what is inside you. The art you make today may become part of what they carry when you're no longer here. So have the difficult conversation. Clear the resentment. Tell people you love them. Make the thing you're called to make. Stop filtering yourself through everyone else's opinions, because the most personal expression of who you are may ultimately become the greatest legacy you leave behind."

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