MORE ALIVE PODCAST | with Andrea Crowder podcast

Ep. 126 Becoming The Met Woman: How to Move Through Conflict Without Losing Your Heart (ft. My Boyfriend Keith)

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What happens when two people who've done "all the work" move in together and old blueprints come roaring back?

In this episode, Andrea and Keith (the Internet's boyfriend) get raw about what really happened when they moved in together after a year of euphoric connection. Andrea shares how she regressed 20 years into "perform for love, earn your safety" patterns. Keith reveals what it's like when your woman is bracing and you can't figure out why, even when you're saying everything "right."

This isn't a cute couples episode. This is the biology of what actually breaks relationships down, and how to repair them by staying in your heart even when you're scared shitless.

 

Key Moments:

"Even though I'm so well trained in emotional regulation and I do this for work...he's not my client, he's my partner. I need to know and trust that he's gonna dig in and do his own inner work."

"One of the sexiest fucking things you could do or be for your woman is to be sturdy. Not wishy-washy. A solid, truthful, sturdy message."

"I had to ask myself: What are my belief systems about men and why do I want them to be true? My answer: I'll be disappointed. Why? Because that way I can prove that I'll save myself."

"I was a runner until I met the man I didn't wanna run from."

"The second you're like 'let me say this perfectly' to manage their emotions, all the nonverbal biological signals start saying: I don't trust you. I don't trust us. I don't trust this situation."

"No conflict can be resolved from your mind. You'll always say the healthy thing if you can stick in your fucking heart the whole time."

"We created this devotional practice: If there's conflict, we can't speak to each other unless we can stay in our heart. And if we pop out, we breathe and drop back in."

"The first emotion that comes up when somebody brings you something is not the truth. That's your old blueprint. That's a trigger."

"I developed an allergy to defending myself. Every single time I did, nothing good happened."

"Become the masterclass. When I started clearing all my triggers (sometimes 10 a day) my spine got straighter and straighter. The second I was decisive and held my Queen posture, he was like 'whatever you need, I'm all in.'"

 

Resources Mentioned:

  • Sterling Men's Weekend (Sterling Institute of Relationship) - Keith's foundational masculine work
  • Heart wall session (Jennifer - DM Andrea for contact)
  • Spine of a Queen - Andrea's 12-month $25K mastermind for established female entrepreneurs (starts Jan 6, 2026, limited to 25 women)
  • The Met Woman - Self-paced program for any woman wanting to create internal safety and become equally met in every room (launching officially January 2026, early enrollment available)

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