Love by Design: How Matt & Rebecca Built a Relationship That Heals and Thrives

Welcome to today’s episode, and it's a different format because rather than asking the questions as usual, Matt and Rebeca are ASKED questions by the amazing Heather Garbutt. We dive into the heart of what it really takes to create a truly nourishing romantic relationship. Matt & Rebeca are couples therapists, coaches, podcasters, and partners in every sense of the word—Matt Albiges and Rebecca Perea. Based in London, Matt and Rebecca work with couples and individuals to transform their relationships from the inside out. In this conversation, we explore the real story behind their relationship: how they met, the early challenges they faced, and the profound inner work each of them undertook to grow into the partners they wanted to be. They share the habits, rituals, and mindset shifts that keep their connection alive, the ways they balance love and business, and how humour, self-awareness, and emotional honesty have become anchors in their life together. This is a candid, heart-opening discussion full of insight, laughter, and practical wisdom. It shows that conscious love isn’t automatic—it’s created. And as Rebeca beautifully puts it, a lasting, fulfilling relationship is absolutely possible. 00:00 – Intro & Guest Bios 02:05 – Meeting, NLP training, serendipity on the London Underground 06:10 – Attraction & Manifestation — First impressions 09:20 – Early Challenges — Pace differences 14:30 – Meeting in the Middle — Matt finding passion; safety, presence, and rapport 18:45 – Habits That Build Trust — Structured check-ins, deep curiosity, masculine/feminine lenses 23:15 – Working Together vs. Being Together — Feeling seen, mirroring language 27:40 – Managing Conflict — Laughing with care (why humor works—and when it doesn’t) 31:10 – Biggest Lessons — Reclaiming playfulness; radical honesty and self-respect 36:05 – Advice to Their Earlier Selves — Including all parts (“Matt vs. John”), law of inclusion 40:20 – Balancing Love & Business — Weekly rhythms, energy shifts, playfulness in intimacy 44:35 – Keeping the Spark Alive — Individual joy, friends, learning, therapy exchange 48:20 – What This Love Means — Growth, mission, spirituality, healing the past 51:30 – Advice for Couples — Don’t assume it’s “easy”; learn dynamics + do inner work 54:45 – Rituals That Work — Daily Thank You / Sorry / Magic Moment; two-bedroom individuation 57:30 – Looking Ahead & How to Connect — Intentionality, “If not now, when?”, Find out more at www.alignedwithlove.net