095: Don't Take Shit SO Personally

Today’s quote is attributed to the ancient Greek philosopher, Aristotle.  Quote: “First, have a definite, clear practical ideal; a goal, an objective. Second, have the necessary means to achieve your ends; wisdom, money, materials, and methods. Third, adjust all your means to that end." – Aristotle Analysis: This quote by Aristotle is often interpreted as a call to action to set clear goals and objectives, and then to develop and use the necessary resources and skills to achieve those goals. The quote suggests that it is important to first have a clear idea of what you want to achieve, and then to gather the resources and knowledge you need to make it happen. Finally, the quote suggests that you should adjust and adapt your strategies and methods to ensure that they are aligned with your ultimate goal. In this way, the quote encourages us to be purposeful and deliberate in our actions, and to use our resources and abilities to achieve our goals. If you don't have the resources you need to reach your goals, it can be discouraging and challenging. However, it's important to remember that many people have overcome obstacles and lack of resources to achieve their goals. Here are a few things you can do if you don't have the resources you need to reach your goals: Identify alternative ways to achieve your goals. Is there another way you can reach your goal, even if you don't have all the resources you need? For example, if you want to go to college but can't afford it, there may be scholarship or financial aid options available. Look for opportunities to acquire the resources you need. Is there a way you can earn or acquire the resources you need to reach your goal? For example, if you need money to start a business, you could consider taking on a part-time job or starting a side hustle to save up the money you need. Seek out support and assistance from others. Sometimes, other people can provide the resources and support you need to achieve your goals. Talk to friends, family, or professionals who may be able to offer guidance, advice, or other forms of support. By being creative and resourceful, and by seeking out support and assistance from others, you can find ways to overcome the lack of resources and achieve your goals. Determination is the quality of being firmly resolved to do something, and it helps us to stay focused and committed to achieving our goals, even when faced with obstacles or setbacks. Perseverance, on the other hand, is the quality of continuing to do something despite difficulties or setbacks. It helps us to keep pushing forward, even when things are tough, and to never give up on our dreams. Together, determination and perseverance help us to stay focused and motivated on the path to achieving our goals. They give us the strength and resilience we need to overcome challenges and obstacles, and to keep moving forward, even when the road is difficult. By cultivating these qualities, we can develop the mental and emotional strength we need to achieve our goals and live a more fulfilling and successful life.

Today’s quote is attributed to Ben Okri, a Nigerian-British poet and novelist. Quote: “The fact of storytelling hints at a fundamental human unease, hints at human imperfection. Where there is perfection there is no story to tell.” – Ben Okri Overall, this quote suggests that storytelling is an essential part of the human experience, and is a way for us to explore and understand the imperfections and challenges of our lives. By telling stories, we can express our fears, doubts, and anxieties, and find meaning and purpose in the imperfections and difficulties that are inherent in being human.  Storytelling is an essential part of the human experience for a number of reasons. Some of the ways in which storytelling is important to the human experience include: Storytelling allows us to express our thoughts, feelings, and experiences. Through storytelling, we can communicate our ideas, emotions, and experiences to others, and share them with the world. Storytelling helps us to make sense of the world around us. By listening to and telling stories, we can learn about different cultures, perspectives, and experiences, and gain a deeper understanding of the world we live in. Storytelling allows us to connect with others. By sharing stories with each other, we can build connections and relationships with other people, and form a sense of community and belonging. Storytelling helps us to preserve our history and heritage. By telling stories, we can preserve the memories, experiences, and traditions of our ancestors, and pass them down to future generations. Overall, storytelling is an essential part of the human experience because it allows us to express ourselves, make sense of the world, connect with others, and preserve our history and heritage. By telling and listening to stories, we can learn about ourselves, our communities, and the world we live in. The concept of the human condition is an ancient one, and has been explored by philosophers, theologians, and other thinkers throughout history. The first written references to the human condition can be found in ancient texts, such as the Bible, the Bhagavad Gita, and the Tao Te Ching. These texts discuss the challenges and struggles that are inherent in being human, and explore the ways in which people can find meaning and purpose in their lives. Overall, the concept of the human condition has been explored by many different thinkers throughout history, and continues to be a topic of interest and debate among philosophers, theologians, and other thinkers today.

Quote: Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. The ability to direct individual accomplishments toward organizational objectives. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results. – Andrew Carnegie Analysis: This quote by Andrew Carnegie is often interpreted as a celebration of the power of teamwork. Carnegie suggests that teamwork is a key factor in achieving success, because it allows people to work together towards a common goal. He also highlights the importance of aligning individual efforts with the goals of the organization, and suggests that teamwork can help people to achieve results that would not be possible alone. The quote suggests that teamwork is an essential quality for any group or organization that wants to achieve success. By working together, people can combine their talents, skills, and experiences to achieve results that are greater than the sum of their individual efforts. This is what Carnegie means when he says that teamwork is the "fuel" that allows common people to achieve uncommon results. In other words, by working together, people can achieve things that would be impossible for them to accomplish on their own. Fostering teamwork can be challenging for a number of reasons. Some of the challenges that organizations may face when trying to foster teamwork include: Lack of trust and communication: In some cases, team members may not trust each other, or may have difficulty communicating and collaborating with each other. This can make it difficult for the team to work together effectively. Different personalities and work styles: Teams are made up of individuals with different personalities, backgrounds, and work styles. This can lead to conflicts and misunderstandings, which can make it difficult for the team to work together. Lack of shared goals and objectives: If team members don't have a clear understanding of the team's goals and objectives, they may not be motivated to work together towards a common goal. This can make it difficult for the team to achieve its objectives. Misalignment of individual and team goals: In some cases, team members may have different goals and priorities than the team as a whole. This can lead to conflicts and misunderstandings, and can make it difficult for the team to work together effectively. Lack of support and resources: If team members don't have the support and resources they need to do their jobs effectively, it can be difficult for them to work together and achieve their goals. A team defines success in different ways, depending on the team's goals, objectives, and priorities. For some teams, success may be measured in terms of the team's ability to achieve specific goals or objectives, such as completing a project on time or within budget. For other teams, success may be measured in terms of the team's performance, such as the number of sales they make or the number of customer service issues they resolve. It's important to note that success is not always measured in terms of tangible results or outcomes. For some teams, success may be measured in terms of the team's ability to work together effectively, to foster collaboration and communication, or to create a positive team culture. In these cases, success may be more difficult to measure, but it is no less important for the team's overall success.

Quote: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou Analysis: It suggests that people are more likely to remember how they felt in a particular situation rather than the specific words or actions of someone. This is because emotions are often more powerful and long-lasting than other forms of information. In other words, the way someone makes another person feel can have a lasting impact on them, even if they forget the details of the situation. This highlights the importance of being aware of how our actions and words may affect others. Here are a SIX ways you can leave a great impression on people: Be punctual: Show up on time for meetings, appointments, and social events. Being punctual demonstrates respect for other people's time and shows that you are reliable and dependable. Be present and engaged: When you are with someone, give them your full attention. Avoid distractions like checking your phone or multitasking, and actively listen to what they have to say. Be kind and respectful: Treat others with compassion and respect, regardless of your differences. Being kind and respectful helps build trust and positive relationships. Be a good communicator: Clearly and effectively communicate your thoughts and ideas. Use active listening skills and ask questions to show that you are interested in the conversation. Be proactive and take initiative: Look for ways to contribute and be of service to others. Show that you are willing to take on new challenges and go above and beyond what is expected of you. Maintain a positive attitude: Stay positive and optimistic, even in the face of challenges. A positive attitude can be contagious and can help build positive relationships with others. It is important to be aware of how our actions and words may affect others because our behavior and communication can have a significant impact on the people around us. Our behavior and words can either positively or negatively affect the emotions, thoughts, and actions of those we interact with.  Being aware of this can help us to be more considerate and empathetic in our interactions with others, which can improve our relationships and create a more positive and harmonious environment. Additionally, understanding the potential impact of our actions and words can also help us to avoid causing harm or offense to others. To be more considerate and empathetic, there are a few things you can try. Firstly, try to put yourself in other people's shoes and see things from their perspective. This can help you to understand their emotions and needs better and respond in a more understanding and compassionate way. Secondly, try to be more attentive to the nonverbal cues of others, such as their body language and tone of voice. This can help you to pick up on their emotional state and respond accordingly. Thirdly, try to be more active in listening to others and truly hearing what they have to say, rather than just waiting for your turn to speak. This can help to foster a sense of connection and understanding between you and the other person. Finally, try to be more mindful of your own actions and words and how they may affect others. This can help you to avoid causing harm or offense and to be more thoughtful in your interactions with others.

Quote: If you hear a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. –Vincent Van Gogh Analysis: This quote is often interpreted as a call to action to pursue your passions and interests, even if there is a voice inside you that tells you that you cannot do something. Van Gogh is saying that if you have a desire to paint, for example, you should not let that inner voice discourage you and instead should focus on your passion and give it your all. By doing this, the voice will eventually be silenced, and you will be able to create and achieve what you want. The quote suggests that we should not be held back by our doubts and fears, but instead should push ourselves to pursue our dreams and talents. Embracing your inner voice can be a powerful way to connect with your own thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. Here are a few ways you can do this: Take some time to be alone and quiet. This can be a great opportunity to tune out distractions and focus on your inner thoughts and feelings. Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment and focusing on your thoughts, feelings, and sensations. This can help you tune in to your inner voice and listen to what it has to say. Consider journaling or keeping a diary. Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a great way to process them and understand your inner voice better. Seek support and guidance from others. Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your inner voice and what it is telling you. They may be able to offer insights and support that can help you embrace your inner voice. Reflect on your values and beliefs. Spend some time thinking about what is important to you and what you believe in. This can help you understand your inner voice and what it is trying to tell you. Developing your core values is an important step in defining who you are and what you stand for. Here are a few steps you can take to develop your own core values: Take some time to reflect on your beliefs and experiences. Think about the things that are most important to you, and what you want to stand for in your life. Consider the people and experiences that have had the biggest impact on you. What values did they embody, and how have those values influenced you? Write down a list of potential core values. This could include words or phrases that describe the qualities and characteristics you want to embody. Reflect on your list and narrow it down to your top values. Consider which values are most important to you and align with your beliefs and experiences. Take action to live your values. Once you have identified your core values, it's important to make a conscious effort to live by them in your daily life. This can help you stay true to yourself and live a more fulfilling and authentic life. Core values are important because they serve as guiding principles for our lives. They help us make decisions, set goals, and determine what is most important to us. By having a clear set of values, we can make choices that are consistent with our beliefs and goals, and avoid actions that go against what we believe in. Core values also help us to be more authentic and genuine in our interactions with others, which can build stronger relationships and improve our overall well-being. In short, having strong, well-defined core values can help us live a more meaningful and fulfilling life.

Quote: "New Year's Day. A fresh start. A new chapter in life waiting to be written. New questions to be asked, embraced, and loved. Answers to be discovered and then lived in this transformative year of delight and self-discovery." - Sarah Ban Breathnach Analysis: This quote says that New Year's Day represents a fresh start and a new opportunity to write the next chapter in your life. It is a time to ask new questions, embrace new experiences, and seek out answers that will help you grow and transform. The new year is a time of possibility and potential, and it is up to you to take advantage of it and make the most of it. The new year is an important time for many people because it represents a fresh start and a new opportunity to make positive changes in their lives. It is a time to reflect on the past year and set goals for the year ahead. Many people use the new year as a chance to make resolutions and commitments to improve themselves and their lives in some way. For some, this might mean losing weight, exercising more, or finding a new job. For others, it might mean working on personal relationships, learning a new skill, or traveling to a new place. Here are TEN simple questions you might consider asking yourself as you welcome in the new year: What am I most proud of from the past year? What challenges did I face, and how did I overcome them? What are my values, and how did they guide my decisions in the past year? What are my top priorities for the new year, and how can I focus on achieving them? What new skills or knowledge do I want to gain in the new year? How can I prioritize self-care and well-being in the new year? How can I make a positive impact on others in the new year? What small steps can I take to make big progress on my goals? How can I be more present and mindful in my daily life? What can I let go of from the past year to make room for growth in the new year? Now, here’s the actionable advice to help think through these questions and strategize for a successful 2023. Set goals and make a plan. Identify areas of your life where you want to improve, and create specific and achievable goals for how you will do that. Then, make a plan for how you will work towards achieving those goals. This will help you stay focused and motivated, and it will give you a sense of direction and purpose. For example, instead of resolving to "lose weight," set a specific goal to "lose 10 pounds by March 1st by exercising 3 times a week and eating a balanced diet." This will make it easier to track your progress and stay motivated. Take care of yourself. Being a better version of yourself also means taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating well, exercising regularly, and finding time to relax and de-stress. These things will help you feel more energized, focused, and resilient as you work towards your goals. Learn and grow. Being a better version of yourself means being open to learning and growing. Seek out new experiences, take on new challenges, and try new things. This will help you expand your horizons and learn more about yourself and the world around you. Be kind and compassionate. Being a better version of yourself means being kind and compassionate towards yourself and others. Treat yourself and others with respect, empathy, and understanding. This will help you build strong and meaningful relationships, and it will make you feel more connected and fulfilled. Stay positive and focused. The new year can be an exciting and challenging time, and it is important to stay positive and focused on your goals. Surround yourself with supportive people, and remind yourself of the reasons why you are working towards becoming a better version of yourself. This will help you stay motivated and on track, even when things get tough.

A widespread conundrum that can negatively impacts the self-esteem level of people of all shapes and sizes is taking SHIT too personally, wearing your heart on your sleeve.  Someone looks at you the wrong way. Someone had an attitude with you. Someone rudely bumped into you at the grocery store. Why the fuck is everyone out to get me this week?  When people disrespect you or treat you poorly, t’s easy to take their actions and/or words personally, especially when you’re already in a rut to begin with. The benefit of not taking shit so personally is that you remain in control of your emotions, reaction, and energy. The SHIT we’re talking about here is other people’s emotions, reactions, and energy! The SHIT you have absolutely no control over. Unconsciously, we usually automatically assume that what someone else says or does was targeted at us specifically. It’s not uncommon to take SHIT out of context here and there. Taking SHIT personally is emotionally draining, and needless, counter-productive, constant reassessment of your self-worth and confidence. There's a difference between being introspective and continually taking snubs personally, one is beneficial and lends itself to personal growth, the other is the opposite. Quote: “When someone is cruel, harsh, mean, to not take their words personally is one thing, but to hear the silent cry within those words is another. This sort of perspective can not only liberate us from crippling self-doubt in the face of criticism, it can also liberate us from automatically becoming blind participants in the interaction patterns that the cruel person has become accustomed to—a favour we do for the other person as much as for ourselves.” ― Vironika Tugaleva It’s probably time you realize that EVERYTHING isn’t about YOU. You are not the center of the universe, even if Mommy told you otherwise . . . It’s very easy to convince yourself that criticism you receive are receiving is a personal attack. But it may simply be that you were dealing with the wrong person, at the wrong time, in the wrong place.  Here are a few ways to stop taking things personally! Don't Jump To Conclusions. Let Things Go. Stop Worrying So Much About What Other People Think of You. Recognize the “Spotlight Effect”. Stop Giving Your Power Away.  Learn to block out the bullshit and channel the good shit. Lions don’t lose sleep over the opinions of sheep! https://mruddo.com IZmOjmVtFGYDeMVbGN4y

Social media is addictive. We’ve all read articles, studies and blog posts about the harmful effects of overindulging on social media.  Researchers and experts in the industry have compared mobile phones to gambling VIA slot machines. "It's a popular addiction right now, one of the still socially acceptable ones," says Laurie Gerber, an expert life coach of the Handel Group.  It can be fun but also maddening. It can make you feel less alone, but also trigger feelings of loneliness and incompetence. If you’re spending a lot of time on social media, it can be hard to imagine a daily routine without it.  Taking a break from social media is a fantastic way to reconnect with the people and activities that truly uplift and motivate you. Use the time you’d otherwise be wasting on social media to read, write, work-out, and spend time with loved ones. You’ll get more work done, faster.  Quote: “When it comes to social media, there are just times I turn off the world, you know. There are just sometimes you have to give yourself space to be quiet, which means you’ve got to set those phones down.” – Michelle Obama I can understand why it may sound daunting or even unnecessary to do a cleanse for those of us who spend a lot of time on these platforms. However, I strongly encourage you to give it a go. Here are SIX SIMPLE STEPS to a SUCCESSFUL SOCIAL MEDIA DETOX. 1) TRACK YOUR HABITS: Try keeping a detailed record of your social media habits for one week, as is. Don’t do ANYTHING differently from what you’d typically do, to establish a baseline or control. Then, quit for one week and note how you feel while being detached from it.  2) Develop a schedule to cut back slowly but surely on your social media use. 3) Detox with a buddy: Having someone to hold you accountable can make all the difference. 4) Put a rubber band around your phone. Catherine Price, author of How to Break up With Your Phone and founder of Screen/Life Balance stated: “When you reach for your phone, there is now a physical obstacle that snaps you out of autopilot for a second and encourages you to reflect on what you’re doing.” 5) Make those around you aware of your SOCIAL MEDIA DETOX plans.  6) Redesign your lock screen. What for? Why now? What else? If you’ve gone through a social media cleanse and have experienced great benefits from it, please share your thoughts with me on social!  https://mruddo.com Visit TakeCareOf.com and Enter Code MRUDDO50 for 50% OFF!

Have you ever felt like the whole world was conspiring against you?! Your job sucks. Your bank account is dwindling. Your spilled coffee all over your favorite shirt. Your friends don’t invite you out anymore. You probably feel used, abused, rejected, and depressed. Maybe you even feel like you deserve to suffer. Peace, success, and happiness seem so, so, so FAR AWAY. To tie a bow on this trail of misery, you’re a perpetual victim. Victimhood is an inescapable reality for you. But what if you didn’t have to feel like this anymore? What if you could put an end to the suffering? Could you imagine how your connections, profession and wellbeing would FLOURISH?! Being victimized can come in all shapes and forms. You could have your trust betrayed by someone near and dear to you, you could be a victim of a horrible crime, you could be a victim of your own mindset.  We all have people like this in our lives, or maybe it’s you that operates under this pessimistic belief system; always bitching about how they were harmed by the system, or by someone else. As if they have NO WILL-POWER and others are rejecting them what they need, want, and deserve. Everyone is out to get them. They were fucked from the jump.  “To complain is always nonacceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the situation by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness."— Eckhart Tolle There are PLENTY OF THINGS you can do when you choose to be a VICTOR, not a VICTIM. 1. Identify and Confront Limiting Beliefs: If our beliefs, our internal dialogue, are disenfranchising and mostly negative, it will NO DOUBT produce feelings of helplessness and vulnerability. You must first discover the source of your victimhood. 2. Practice Gratitude: There’s no time to be a victim when you’re busy practicing gratitude. The strongest willed people I know are the ones who are grateful for even the hard times, because they understand that through experience, they gain wisdom and perspective.  3. Shift YOUR Mentality from Victim to Survivor: Shitty things happen to the best of us. They say God gives his hardest battles to his strongest soldiers. Tough times make tough people. There’s a million fucking sayings, you get the point.  BEAUTIFUL FUCKING THINGS HAPPEN WHEN YOU TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE.  https://Audible.com/mruddo https://mruddo.com

Have you ever heard the origin story of the Nobel Peace Prize?! Alfred Nobel paradoxically was the visionary behind the Nobel Peace Prize, which has been awarded 962 times since 1901.  While Nobel’s award fund would ultimately become famous, there’s no refuting that he was an unlikely source for a peace prize. His family name was “associated not with the arts of peace but with the arts of war.”  What encouraged the “dynamite king” to donate his fortune to charity? Many believe it was inspired by a case of mistaken identity. In 1888, Nobel’s brother Ludvig had died in France from a heart attack. Credited to poor reporting, at least one French newspaper believed that it was Alfred who had perished, and it proceeded to write a blistering obituary that branded him a “merchant of death” who had grown rich by forming new ways to “mutilate and kill.”  The mistake was later remedied, but not before Alfred had the horrible experience of reading his own death notification. According to biographer Kenne Fant, Nobel “became so obsessed with his posthumous reputation that he rewrote his last will, bequeathing most of his fortune to a cause upon which no future obituary writer would be able to cast aspersions.” Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you. – Shannon Alder  Nobel lives on through his legacy and receiving a shocking reminder of the inevitability of his death helped him to get there. His story also illustrates how avoiding a negative legacy can be more motivating than simply wanting to build a positive one. To create a powerful legacy with your life, you need to decide what contribution you want to make to the world. I suggest spending some time journaling and reflecting on the following questions: What does it mean to you to create your living legacy?  What contribution do you want to make to the world? If you knew with certainty that you only had ten more years to live, how would you spend those years, and why? What message do you want to send with your life to the world and to those who matter most to you? Imagine that you are attending your own funeral. What would you want your family and friends to say about you and how you lived your life? Knowing what’s important, what drives you, and how you want to be remembered creates tremendous clarity in how you should live your life— and how you’ll eventually impact others. https://Audible.com/mruddo https://mruddo.com