Dogg Zzone 9000 - Episode 248, RIFTS with Merritt K

Jason Pargin's favorite hotdog is a hamburger with a side of racism, an icey glass of sexual assualt and a garnish of songs that are maybe some of the best ever written. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Robert will go to jail if you don't buy his book. I know what you're thinking... This is NOT the time to be a wise guy. BUY HIS BOOK. https://linktr.ee/killyourimaginaryfriend

Pierce Brosnan: Own it, enjoy it, don't worry about it. Words our guest Alex Schmidt lives by. Join us as the DOGGZZONE dives into what may be the most handsome origin story of any guest!

MORE Brosnan! Because one Brosnan is never enough. Just ask Schmidty, he'll tell ya!

The Dogg Zzone welcomes Dimitri Simakis from Everything Is Terrible for another Hot Dog origin story! Come learn how a pitcher of rapping sugar water led to the creation of the world's largest collection of Jerry Maguire VHS tapes! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Robert will go to jail if you don't buy his book. I know what you're thinking... This is NOT the time to be a wise guy. BUY HIS BOOK. https://linktr.ee/killyourimaginaryfriend

The original Rock 'n' Roll High School was a fun punk rock classic. The sequel is a Corey Feldman musical. It's the farthest human art has fallen in the least amount of time, and fucking Zak Koonce insisted we watch it. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Robert will go to jail if you don't buy his book. I know what you're thinking... This is NOT the time to be a wise guy. BUY HIS BOOK. https://linktr.ee/killyourimaginaryfriend

Back in the 1990s we briefly mistook elaborate prosthetics for comedy. That's how we got The Amazing Live Sea Monkeys, a Howie Mandel production starring three suffocating improv comedians dying inside defective sex toys. Michael Swaim will explain how they influenced the course of his entire life. Presumably for the worse. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Robert will go to jail if you don't buy his book. I know what you're thinking... This is NOT the time to be a wise guy. BUY HIS BOOK. https://linktr.ee/killyourimaginaryfriend

Roll up an illegitimate, alcoholic Glitter Boy and step into the world of the RIFTS Source Book with Merritt K. What happens when you put EVERYTHING in a single tabletop role-playing game? Local lunatic Kevin Siembieda tried to answer that question and wound up with an unplayable game and a mechanical battle kangaroo. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Robert will go to jail if you don't buy his book. I know what you're thinking... This is NOT the time to be a wise guy. BUY HIS BOOK. https://linktr.ee/killyourimaginaryfriend

Learning can be fun! But not here. Here, you suffer. Mark Mahoney hates your brain and he's going to prove it with, "Learn at Every Turn." Warning: Contains a sexy and naked native sexual awakening and NOTHING ELSE. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Robert will go to jail if you don't buy his book. I know what you're thinking... This is NOT the time to be a wise guy. BUY HIS BOOK. https://linktr.ee/killyourimaginaryfriend

The late Dennard Dayle brought White Chicks into the Dogg Zzone. Seanbaby and Brockway did what had to be done. Dennard claimed the film was responsible for his origin as a comedian and curator of cursed media. It's almost admirable, that he was willing to die for this. He would be missed, if it weren't for White Chicks. https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/how-to-dodge-a-cannonball-dennard-dayle/1146167653 ALSO... Robert will go to jail if you don't buy his book. I know what you're thinking... This is NOT the time to be a wise guy. BUY HIS BOOK. https://linktr.ee/killyourimaginaryfriend

We're exploring the cursed media origins of the Hot Dog Crew, and this week it's Lydia Bugg with a show called Atlantis High, a paranormal New Zealand YA sitcom. It's like Saved by the Bell meets The X Files, but darker and hornier than either of those things. It definitely shouldn't exist, but it does explain absolutely everything about Lydia.