Why 'New Year, New You' Backfires (Nervous System Edition)

Why does “New Year, New You” feel so motivating… and then fall apart just weeks later? In this episode, we explore why New Year’s resolutions often backfire—not because you lack discipline or willpower, but because they ask your nervous system to do something it’s biologically wired to resist. Through a nervous-system and mental-health lens, we unpack why massive change feels threatening, how winter is a season of rest (not reinvention), and what a more sustainable, regulated approach to the new year actually looks like. This is an invitation to move away from pressure and performance—and toward safety, support, and gentle, lasting change.In This Episode, You’ll Learn:Why your nervous system resists big, fast change—and why that resistance is protection, not self-sabotageHow “New Year, New You” puts your body into threat mode and leads to burnout, not transformationWhy January is biologically a season for rest and reflection—not aggressive goal-settingThe four phases of the Resolution Crash: Mobilization, Sustainable Burn, the Crash, and the Shame SpiralHow to use "laughably small" habits to bypass your internal alarm system and create lasting change3 Takeaways:Resistance Is Protection When your nervous system pushes back against change, it’s not because you’re broken—it’s because your body equates familiarity with safety. Change requires resourcing, not force.Winter Is Not a Growth Season Nature rests in winter, and so do we. Trying to overhaul your life in January asks your body to act like it’s spring—when it’s wired for conservation, reflection, and repair.Measure Regulation, Not Performance Lasting change doesn’t come from dramatic overhauls. It comes from tiny additions, moments of safety, and choosing regulation over all-or-nothing goals.—Looking for more personalized support?Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)Join me inside Regulated Living, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.Website: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

In Part 2 of our New Year mini-series, we’re moving beyond the "New Year, New You" hype to have a more honest conversation about what it actually looks like to let go. Following Amanda's annual NYE Circle event, she's sharing the raw, real list of patterns and beliefs that she is choosing to leave behind.From the "addiction to urgency" to the "shoulds" we place on our grieving bodies, this episode is an invitation to gently acknowledge and begin to untangle the habits or patterns that once kept us safe but no longer serve us.Resources Mentioned:The Brick: That little device I'm using to help curb my phone addiction. (Get 10% off via this link: https://www.getbrick.app/AMANDA99695) *Disclosure: This is link an affiliate link, meaning I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend tools I personally use and trust to support my own nervous system.Annual NYE Circle: My 6th-year community ritual for intentional reflection. If you'd like to participate in the full NYE Circle you can CLICK HERE to access the replay which will be available until January 11th.—Looking for more personalized support?Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)Join me inside Regulated Living, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.Website: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

The calendar says the year is over, but has your nervous system caught up? In Part 1 of our New Year’s Mini Series, we’re moving away from high-pressure goal setting and "new year, new you" rhetoric. Instead, we are creating a "pocket of space" to let the previous year actually complete.Our bodies don’t experience time through dates; they experience it through processed or unprocessed sensations. Join me for a condensed version of my annual New Year’s Eve Circle—a somatic practice designed to help you exhale, acknowledge what you’ve carried, and release what no longer belongs to you before moving forward.If you'd like to participate in the full NYE Circle you can CLICK HERE to access the replay which will be available until January 11th.How to Engage With This Episode:Passive: Simply listen and let the reflections move through you like a meditation.Active: Grab a pen and paper, light a candle, and use the pauses to engage with the journaling prompts and release ritual.Now hit play to join me for a guided experience where we will regulated, reflect, release, and resource.—Looking for more personalized support?Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)Join me inside Regulated Living, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.Website: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

Sign up for the NYE Circle – Sunday, December 28th at 8 PM ET - CLICK HEREIn this episode I yap about my dumpster fire day. Thought I had childcare, I didn't. My 2 year old had 47 meltdowns. My 4mo old joined me for the membership Q&A— cute but not ideal. I found out a full bag of Christmas gifts got accidentally taken out with the trash last night. My son pulled our fish tank down off the shelf. Gallons of water and tiny rocks EVERYWHERE, a gash in his leg, but luckily the fish survived and is currently swimming around in a soup bowl. Andddd tomorrow is a big grief anniversary for me.I will be crying into a cookie immediately after hitting post on this podcast but before I do I'll invite you to my NYE Circle event happening on the 28th. I share those details the last 10 or so minutes of the episode.—Looking for more personalized support?Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)Join the Regulated Living Membership waitlist to be first to know when doors open again!Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!Website: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

In this episode (a repeat conversation from 2023), Amanda dives into a common struggle during the winter months: Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), or seasonal depression. She shares listener struggles, the science behind how light impacts our mood, and actionable, research-backed tools to help you navigate the winter blues.In this episode you'll learn: The definition of Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and why the decrease in daylight hours is the biggest contributing factor.The three empirically supported treatments for SAD: Antidepressant medication, Bright Light Therapy, and CBT-SAD.The fascinating science behind how melanopsin cells in the eye and retinal responsivity link directly to your vulnerability to seasonal depression.Why the single most high-payoff habit for mental and physical health—especially in winter—is getting morning sunlight exposure.Practical guidance on using a Bright Light Therapy (Happy Lamp) device as an accessible, research-backed alternative to natural light.3 Takeaways:SAD is linked to decreased daylight hours, but understanding your unique contributing factors (biological vs. seasonal stressors) is essential for choosing the most supportive intervention.New research points to lower retinal effectiveness to light in winter months as a possible biological vulnerability for SAD, suggesting why light-based interventions are often highly effective.Daily morning sunlight is essential for optimal health of every human, but appears especially supportive for those struggling with SAD, who may benefit from supplementing with a bright light therapy pad.—📘 Other Resources:"Happy Light" Recommendations: Verilux® HappyLight w/ Timer ($39)Other resources:Understanding and Treating Seasonal Affective Disorder | UPMC HealthBeat PodcastDr. Samer Hattar: Timing Light, Food, & Exercise for Better Sleep, Energy & Mood | Huberman Lab #43Using Light to Optimize Health | Huberman Lab Podcast #68 (helpful times stamp @ ~ 1:12:00), Huberman Lab Light ProtocolThe Role Of Environmental Light ExposureMelanopsin Driven Pupil Responses and Physical ActivityWebsite: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

We all bump into the blurry line between regulating and avoiding. In this episode, Amanda unpacks the difference between soothing your nervous system and emotionally bypassing—using a real client story to show how even “healthy” tools can become numbing when the intention and impact are off. Learn how to choose between regulation and resourcing, and try a simple check-in to turn coping back into connection.In this episode, you’ll learn:The clear definitions of regulation (state-shifting) vs avoidance/numbing (state-escaping)Why the same behavior (TV, scrolling, exercise, breathwork) can heal or hide depending on intention & impactThe difference between regulating and resourcing—and when each is appropriateHow “pop healing” can unintentionally promote bypassing (and what to do instead)A quick two-question experiment to notice whether you’re shifting away from or expanding capacity for what you feel3 Takeaways:The same behavior can heal or hide, intention & impact are the tells. Regulation restores presence and energy; avoidance suppresses and disconnects. Ask: Does this make me more present or less present?We need both regulating and resourcing tools. Use regulation when a state feels too big or inaccurate to the moment; use resourcing to expand your ability to be with what’s here safely.Awareness is the work. Before you reach for a tool, pause: What am I feeling? What’s my intention? That tiny check-in turns numbing into nourishment and coping into true regulation.—Looking for more personalized support?Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)Join me inside Regulated Living, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.Website: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

This week, I’m pulling back the curtain on the Regulated Living Membership—because doors are officially open.If you've been stuck in survival mode, if therapy and mindset work helped you understand the why but didn’t give you a way forward—this is for you.In today’s episode, I walk you through the what, why, and who of the membership. You’ll hear real member stories, learn what makes this space different, and get a behind-the-scenes look at Course Club—our 5-week guided orientation that starts Monday.We talk:Why your symptoms make senseWhat traditional mental health models are missingThe difference between Restore and the membershipWhat’s inside, how it works, and how to know if it’s for youEnrollment closes Saturday at midnight. This episode is your personal invitation to join us—no pressure, just a chance to feel seen, supported, and grounded again.🔗 Learn more & join: https://regulatedliving.com/membership💌 Questions? email [email protected]: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

Sometimes, the kindest thing you can do for your nervous system isn’t to rest—it’s to move. This episode is for the ones who don’t relate to overachieving or overfunctioning because they’re on the other end of the spectrum: the stuck, the shut down, the ones who can’t seem to get going no matter how much they want to.If motivation feels impossible and even small tasks feel like climbing a mountain, this episode will help you understand why—and how to begin again with gentleness and devotion instead of shame.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why low energy, lack of motivation, and “laziness” are actually physiological responses, not character flawsThe nervous system science behind shutdown and how it traps you in inactionWhy waiting for motivation doesn’t work—and what to do insteadHow to reclaim the word discipline as an act of devotion, not punishmentThe 5-Minute Win: a simple practice to help you break inertia and start rebuilding energy3 Takeaways: For a shut-down system, discipline is self-care. Gentle action—one small, consistent thing—is the medicine that restores motion and energy.Motivation is the result, not the prerequisite. Waiting to “feel like it” keeps you stuck. Taking one tiny action is the jumpstart that recharges your system.Reframe discipline as devotion. It’s not a drill sergeant yelling “get up,” it’s the loving inner parent or part saying, “Let’s do one small thing together because you deserve to feel better.”—Looking for more personalized support?Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)Join me inside Regulated Living, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.Website: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

This episode will only be live for a few days—and so will this offer.If you’ve been thinking about working with us 1:1 inside RESTORE, hit play.For this week only (or until 5 spots fill), we’re offering: – $1,000 off the full RESTORE program – Lifetime membership access (normally 6 months) – Comprehensive bloodwork + Review – HSA/FSA eligible – Flexible payment plans availableRESTORE is our high-touch, neuroscience-backed, 16-week coaching program designed to help you heal anxiety and depression at the root.No more guessing. No more “coping” as a lifestyle. Just personalized support, a clear plan, and tools that actually work in the moment.CLICK HERE to book your free discovery callCalls must be booked before midnight Wednesday the 19th to claim the RESTORE offer. No same-day bookings—so if you're feeling the nudge, now’s the time.I'm looking forward to supporting you ❤️‍🩹Questions? [email protected]: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise

Today's conversation is for the Type A, high achieving, often overwhelmed and anxious nervous system folk. Amanda talk about the pattern we often see where we stop our self-care habits when we feel good, but stopping them often puts us back into a spiral of anxiety and the story of, "why do I do this? I'm just not disciplined or motivated enough, etc..." But what if that’s not the problem at all?In this episode, we reframe what it means to “stay consistent,” explore why many of us use overwhelm as our barometer, and talk about how true discipline might actually look like doing less, not more.3 Takeaways:1. Maybe you're not falling back into "bad habits" - you're overcommitting until self-care becomes impossible. When life gets good, we reflexively add more to our plates instead of maintaining what's working. The problem isn't lack of discipline; it's trying to fit 60 hours of life into 24 hours of human capacity.2. Not all regulation tools are meant to be forever - and that's okay. Healing requires adjusting your “protocol.” Just like you don't need an ankle brace after your sprain heals, some nervous system supports are temporary medicine for acute times. The key is knowing which practices are your anchors (the ones you need even when you're well) versus which ones can naturally fade as you heal.3. Redefine discipline: Maybe it's not the choice to do more, it's the courage to do less. True discipline means saying no to opportunities even though you could squeeze them in, maintaining white space in your calendar even though it makes you anxious, and remembering that feeling good isn't permission to overwhelm yourself again. Ask yourself: "At what cost?" before saying yes.—Looking for more personalized support?Book a FREE discovery call for RESTORE, our 1:1 anxiety & depression coaching program (HSA/FSA eligible & includes comprehensive bloodwork)Join me inside Regulated Living, a mental health membership and nervous system healing space (sliding scale pricing available)Order my book, Healing Through the Vagus Nerve today!*Want me to talk about something specific on the podcast? Let me know HERE.Website: https://www.regulatedliving.com/podcastEmail: [email protected]: @amandaontheriseTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@amandaontherise