23. You Do Owe People Things: The Myth of Zero Obligations

Tired of oversimplified self help advice? US TOO! Today we are diving into our controversial take on why we don't like the "Let Them" theory by Mel Robbins.Listen to hear...- The problematic oversimplification in viral mental health theories- Why the original "Let Them" poem by Cassie Phillips carries more depth and nuance- The problem with shame-based approaches to personal development- The difference between temporary inspiration and lasting transformation- The inherent privilege in telling someone to "just let them"- What we actually recommend INSTEADWant to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. We’d love to hear what you think!Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

Ready to get uncomfortably honest about why being "the nice one" is leaving you feeling resentful? This is part 2 of our people pleasing episode. Go listen to the first episode before diving into this one!In conversation, we tackle:* The exhausting cycle of expecting people to read your mind* How avoiding conflict actually creates MORE conflict* Why assertiveness feels like aggression when you're used to people pleasing* Sam’s experience learning to stop apologizing for existing* How resentment builds when you don't express your needs* Why your passive aggression isn't as subtle as you think* The freedom that comes from letting people be upset with you* Amanda's story of making amends at WawaWant to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. We’d love to hear what you think!Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

Buckle up! We get radically candid about our own (very different) journeys with people-pleasing. We share:* How Amanda discovered her "thoughtful gift-giving" was actually manipulation to avoid accountability* Why Sam's role as a childhood caregiver shaped her people-pleasing patterns* How Sam learned to stop apologizing for existing* Their personal struggles with being "the nice one"* Why they both ended up becoming therapists for the "wrong" reasons* The uncomfortable truth about using "niceness" as control* What happens when your whole identity is built on being agreeableUse code NUANCE for 40% off of Cozy Earth. Check out www.cozyearth.comWant to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. We’d love to hear what you think!Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

Tired of understanding all your patterns but still feeling stuck? In this episode, we're diving into the uncomfortable truth about why all that self-help content and therapy insight isn't actually changing your life.In conversation, we tackle:Why being "the self-aware friend" might be your newest form of avoidanceHow instant access to information is making us worse at solving our own problemsWhy validation without action is just spicy procrastinationThe uncomfortable truth about why therapy isn't just about feeling seenWhat your endless TikTok scrolling says about your fear of changeHow technology is teaching us to avoid sitting with hard emotionsWhy waiting to feel "ready" means waiting foreverThe difference between productive discomfort and tolerating what needs to changePractical steps for moving from understanding to action Want to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. We’d love to hear what you think!Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

Is your commitment to being perfect or good actually the enemy of your growth? In this episode we discuss: - The subtle ways perfectionism masquerades as preparation and protection- How perfectionism can become a form of self-harm and procrastination- The connection (and important differences) between perfectionism and people-pleasing- Why letting go of perfectionism can feel like losing your foundation- The role of defensiveness in maintaining perfectionist behaviors- How social media has transformed perfectionism from an internal to an external expectation. Use code NUANCE for 40% off of Cozy Earth. Check out www.cozyearth.comWant to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. We’d love to hear what you think!Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

Want to prevent estrangement in your kids? This is the second part of our conversation with Whitney Goodman, LMFT. For the first part, please listen to the "Calling Home" podcast. In the first part of this conversation, we cover, what social media gets wrong about parental estrangement and what the nuance is that is missing online. In this second part of the conversation, we discuss. - How becoming a parent has impacted how Whitney and Amanda see parental estrangement- The single most important thing you can do to prevent estrangement with your child- How to repair with your child (or anyone), when you make a mistakeWant to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.Whitney Goodman, LMFT is a licensed therapist and the founder of Calling Home, a community for adults who want to have better relationships with their family. To join check out www.callinghome.co or check out Whitney on instagram www.instagram.com/sitwithwhit

Has "setting boundaries" turned into an excuse for treating people like they're disposable? We're seeing a concerning trend in our therapy rooms: people are using self-care language to justify ghosting, dishonesty, and basic human decency.In conversation, we tackle:The wild disconnect between how we treat strangers IRL vs. potential partners onlineWhy your "I don't owe anyone anything" mindset might be sabotaging your chances at real connectionThe uncomfortable truth about why you're really keeping those dating app matches aroundHow friend groups can enable poor behavior (yes, we're looking at those "slay queen" responses)What evolution and psychology tell us about why we actually DO need each otherTips for how to maintain boundaries while also being a more caring personSPONSORS: Use code NUANCE for 40% off of Cozy Earth. Check out www.cozyearth.comWant to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

In this raw and personal bonus episode, Sam and Amanda process their feelings on Inauguration Day, sharing a candid conversation about:Dealing with political anxiety and finding hope amid uncertaintySam's experiences working in healthcare during COVID-19, including confronting conspiracy theorists and managing the hospital's COVID responseThe importance of local government and understanding political structures that remain in placeHistorical perspectives on social movements and resistancePractical ways to take action while maintaining mental healthThe balance between acknowledging difficult realities and maintaining hopeWant to join the conversation? CALL us at 813-444-8683 or EMAIL [email protected] Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

In this candid episode, therapists Sam and Amanda discuss Sam's recent experience with a TikTok going viral. After posting about friendship and flaking culture, Sam faced unexpected backlash leading to a broader conversation about social media, nuance, and connection in today's world. The hosts explore:How legitimate concerns about accessibility and mental health can sometimes be weaponized to avoid discomfortThe erosion of our collective ability to say "this doesn't apply to me" and keep scrollingThe importance of maintaining friendships despite busy lives and different life stagesPractical ways to maintain connections when you have limited capacityThe difference between genuine barriers to connection and avoidanceHow social media has complicated our expectations for socializingThe long-term investment of friendship and why it matters. Want to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. Follow us on Instagram or TikTok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.

In this episode of the Nuance Needed podcast, Amanda and Sam delve into their favorite mental health advice and life lessons. They explore the concept of numbing emotions, the importance of yoga and mindfulness in personal growth, and the significance of understanding one's emotions through interoception. The conversation emphasizes the need for self-advocacy, embracing both good and bad experiences, and living intentionally by considering how one's future self would respond to challenges. In this conversation, Amanda and Sam explore the importance of morning routines, self-care, and finding stability amidst chaos. 0:40-13:40 You cannot selectively numb.13:47-35:50 How would future me want to respond to this?SPONSORS: Use code NUANCE for 40% off of Cozy Earth. Check out www.cozyearth.comWant to join the conversation? EMAIL- [email protected] or LEAVE US A MESSAGE at 813-444-8683. Follow us on Instagram or Tiktok- Sam (@Sam.the.therapist) Amanda (@Therapyforwomen) To learn more about therapy reach out to Therapy for Women Center, therapyforwomencenter.com. We have therapists licensed in 42 states across the country and have offices if you are local to the Philadelphia area.