188. Ditch The Good Girl Behavior: How To Stop People Pleasing, Get Comfortable Disappointing Them & Quit Over Apologizing

We're chatting with Sara Fisk, host of the Ex Good Girl podcast and coach for people who want to stop people pleasing. We cover: What it means to be "a good girl" and how it's RUINING your life both in and outside the bedroom The "Good Girl Rules" we need to start breaking in order to live our most authentic, fulfilling lives WHY we people please and how to know when we're doing it A step by step plan for eliminating people pleasing from your life How to disappoint people (and why you should start doing it) How to navigate difficult conversations How to stop apologizing SO. F***ING. MUCH. Connect with Sara: On her website On Instagram Listen to her podcast Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

After 4 years of interviewing experts, we’re sharing EVERYTHING we’ve learned about asking for what you want in the bedroom (and beyond). We chat through how to ask for what you want, and tools to help you advocate for yourself from start to 💦finish💦. We cover: Common obstacles and how to overcome them How to figure out what you want What to do if you’re feeling insecure about your desires Tools to make asking easier How to deal with rejection (and gracefully reject someone else) Examples of how to negotiate and discuss sexual interests with a partner How to navigate *in the moment* requests How to give (and receive) post-sex feedback  Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We're chatting all things ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION with Melissa Hadley Barrett, a Nurse Practitioner and Sexologist from Western Australia who specializes in treating ED. We unpack the causes of ED, the many treatment options, and how to start working through any shame or embarrassment you or your partner may be experiencing. We also cover: How COMMON erectile dysfunction is and why you really don't need to feel ashamed Reasons why you may be experiencing ED What to say to a partner who's experiencing ED What's considered NORMAL when it comes to erections (frequency, duration etc.) How to access treatment for ED Lifestyle changes that may help your ED Things you can do IN THE MOMENT to help your erection (position changes etc.) The deal with penis pumps... because it turns out they're kinda cool Connect with Melissa: On her website On Instagram On TikTok Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Danielle Savory, a pleasure coach, is here to help us redefine wtf PLEASURE means and how to start prioritizing it. You deserve to be PLEASURED and SATISFIED both in the bedroom and beyond. Luckily Danielle is giving us all the necessary steps to make that a reality. We cover: What pleasure does to your brain Why we need to be prioritizing pleasure (HINT: it'll improve your life and help you achieve your goals) How to find your personal "why" for prioritizing pleasure How to prioritize pleasure even if you're super busy How to prioritize pleasure during sex The difference between pursuing pleasure vs pursuing happiness How to program your brain to look for the good How stress impacts your experience of pleasure and how to start stressing less Connect with Danielle: On her website On Instagram Listen to her podcast "It's My Pleasure" Savory Starter Guide Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Did you know that dating can actually be JOYFUL? That you don't HAVE to be on the apps to meet people? We sure didn't. Thank the good lord for Lily Womble, creator of Date Brazen and author of "Thank You, More Please: A Feminist Guide to Breaking Dumb Dating Rules and Finding Love." In this episode, Lily covers: Why the current state of dating sucks so much... it's not just you and there's real cognitive reasons why it feels so awful How to start centering IRL dating and get off the apps How to stop feeling behind and embrace your singleness A step-by-step plan to take your dating life from *bleh* to FULL OF JOY How to embrace the awkwardness and messiness of dating What the phrase "Thank You, More Please" means and how to start using it to create the life you want How to build a date that brings you joy Connect with Lily: On her website  Buy her book  Main Character Dating course  Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re talking all things GRIEF with our favorite therapists: Emmalee Bierly, LMFT and Jennifer Chaiken, LMFT aka Shrink Chicks. We dive into what grief ACTUALLY is, how it shows up in our lives, and how tf to deal with it. We also cover: How to identify when you’re feeling grief The unexpected ways grief shows up in our lives Grieving when things don’t go the way you expected How control and expectations play into grief How resilience actually makes you cooler, braver and stronger  Why having a specific timeline for your life sets you up for failure The ways you’re probably invalidating your own grief and how to stop Additional ways to process grief Connect with Em & Jen: On their website Listen to their podcast Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week we’re catching up by diving into our inbox and sharing some of our wildest emails. We’re also sharing some of our favorite sex facts that are pretty much guaranteed to make you feel good about yourself. We cover: The spicy (and unwanted) invitations we've received via email What research has to say about unsolicited dick pics Q+A: How to deal when you want to try something new in the bedroom and your partner DOES NOT aka managing rejecting We dive into the data to find out: Are people actually having that much sex? How many sexual partners is considered "normal"? How confident people actually feel in the bedroom? What's the deal with sex dreams? What are people doing with their pubes? Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Need a little guidance? Us too. That's why we turned to Aja Vines, an intuitive reader and guide who just GETS IT. She's sharing her best tips for living your most authentic, fulfilling life and if you're anything like us, it's EXACTLY what you've been needing to hear. We cover: What it ACTUALLY means to live an authentic life How to know what's authentic to YOU Steps you can take to build self-trust How to comfort yourself instead and STOP beating yourself up What to do when you're feeling behind in life What your intuition is and how to get in touch with it How to start using tarot/oracle cards A VERY SPECIAL INTUITIVE READING just for our Honeys The oracle deck Aja used for our reading is linked HERE!  Connect with Aja: On her website  On TikTok  Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

April Davis of Haus of Vagina, a sex and menstrual educator, is BACK to tell us everything we need to know (but definitely don’t) about vaginas, periods, and birth. We cover: Labiaplasty- what’s the deal, why people get them, what the potential side effects are, and questions to ask if you’re considering getting one What happens to your vagina after you give birth Postpartum sex and why it’s not as scary or bad as they say it will be Questions to ask your OB or gynecologist  The importance of caring for your pelvic floor How cycle syncing (aka living your life according to which part of the menstrual cycle you’re in) will help you fall in lovewith your period and life in general How to cycle sync if you have an IUD Rethinking the language we use when talking about sex and vaginas Connect with April: On her website On Instagram Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We're starting off our new season by learning how to navigate change and life transitions with our bestie Victoria Albina, NP, MPH. Victoria is a coach who helps people overcome their codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing thinking and she's also our go-to whenever we're ready to feel SEEN, heard, and have our worlds absolutely rocked. In this episode, Victoria covers: The very primal reasons why change can be TERRIFYING Finding safety in yourself so you can be confident navigating change How to find your truth and also know when it's time for change Why your desire to keep other people happy gives you a false sense of safety What to do when the people in your life don't like, acknowledge, or support your changes Why it's not ~always~ a bad thing to care what others think How to stop fighting and let other people have their experience (spoiler: we don't have to control everything and maybe it isn't all that serious anyway)  Before the interview, we also chat about: Your sexy summer stories The changes we've been going through What you can expect from Honeydew Me this season Connect with Victoria: On her website FREE RESOURCES for Honeydew Me Listeners Listen to her podcast Watch Honeydew Me On YouTube Keep up with Honeydew Me: On Instagram On TikTok  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices