Navigating PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)

Does your child struggle with handwriting? What about writing composition in general? Writing is a highly integrative process with many factors to consider. Challenges with writing skills can be confusing and complicated, leaving a child and/or family with no clear direction to take other than to “try harder” or opt-out of traditional writing practices altogether. But what if we could pinpoint the unique needs of a child to help their writing skills flourish?In this episode, Teresa Nair joins Cassie and Erica for the final episode in our 6-part series. In less than an hour, you’ll learn about the many layers of writing skills and what we can do to support our children who struggle. Join us to and learn about:The elements of writing skills:CommunicationSocial-emotional components that are embeddedRegulatoryExecutive FunctionBilateral integrationWorking memorySequencingMechanical componentsFine motorVisual motorHand-eye coordinationPostural/core factorsBilateral motor coordination …just to name a few!Considerations and/or intervention approaches to reduce writing struggling, including but not limited to:Asking “what does this assignment really need?”Vision therapy/Developmental OptometrySensory Integration TherapyPhonological Awareness interventionExecutive Function coachingQuick tips and tricks that you can start with today**Resources**Wieder, S & Wachs, H (2012) .Visual/Spatial Portals to Thinking, Feeling and Movement: Advancing Competencies and Emotional Development in Children with Learning and Autism Spectrum Disorders. https://a.co/d/efBmZ5R Home of DIRFloorTime®: Radio Shows. https://www.icdl.com/parents/webradio/visual-spacial-processing-and-thinking **Contact Teresa**Title: Education Advisor and Speaker Email: [email protected] Social: LinkedIn Profile   ***Erica’s NEW website*** https://feedingconsciousrelationships.com/ ****Music credits****Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

“My child HATES school.”“It’s like pulling teeth to get my child to school.”“I literally can’t get my kid to go to school.”If you’re facing school refusal issues in your home, you’re not alone. As the educational landscape simultaneously shifts and stagnates in the United States, increasing numbers of children struggle to engage in school and learning. What do we do about it? Listen to this episode to find out!In this 5th episode of our 6-part series, Erica and Cassie once again join Teresa Nair to collectively unpack the foundational considerations for school refusal. This was only the beginning of the conversation! Listen to this episode to find out:What is school refusal? What does it look like?What is educational trauma?How to address school refusal:Early identifiers (e.g., “yellow flags”)Becoming an investigator to address the root causes of school refusalAcknowledging the developmental hierarchy that influences one’s ability to participate in school/academic activitiesHow to address the underlying factors (including but not limited to):“Bottom-up” support to build resilience and adaptivityCommunicating with school staff in a productive and effective way. Being your child’s best advocate for their learningGetting the support YOU need as a parent as you navigate this difficult experienceEmpowering school staff to understand what YOUR child’s behavior communicates and what they’re really asking forHelping parents and educators:Align expectationsNot take the child’s behavior personallyRemain curious and maintain open communication for compassionate and collaborative problem-solvingWe hope you join us as we discuss the normalization of non-traditional pathways and breaking free of a binary perspective on education for the sake of every child’s wellbeing.And don’t forget to join us next month for our final episode in this 6-part series where we will unpack Writing Skills! **Resources**Pyramid of Potential: https://maximumpotential.org.uk/the-developmental-pyramid/ **Contact Teresa**Title: Education Advisor and Speaker Email: [email protected] Social: LinkedIn Profile   ***Erica’s NEW website*** https://feedingconsciousrelationships.com/ ****Music credits****Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

We’re circling back to a hot topic—Executive Function. This multi-layered set of skills is impacted by many building blocks of development, and challenges can present in a myriad of ways. As a continuation of our six-part series with Teresa Nair, in this episode you will hear about:Descriptions of Executive Function from multiple perspectivesNature and nurture contributionsThe integrative and developmental pathways of executive function which includes:Physical/sensoryEmotionalExperientialRelationalHow do challenges with executive function show up in daily life? Children, teens, or people in general may exhibit difficulties with:Perspective-taking“Compliance”Emotional dysregulationDisorganizationInflexible thinkingDifficulty delaying gratification“Bossy” behaviorAnd more!What do parents do if they think their child has challenges with executive function? First, know yourself as the parent. Then consider initial steps…Start with research ORStart looking for professional support by… Talking with your pediatrician or another trusted professional you have a relationship with. Asking your community, your friends. You’re not alone in this!Be open to new ways of thinking such as:“How do we connect the skills of where our child shines (e.g., video games) to the skills we desire our children to develop (e.g., cleaning their room)?Identify areas where our kids are struggling and name it was a skill they have not mastered yet rather than a fault of theirs.**Resources**Dr. Ross Green’s “Kids to Well If They Can” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jvzQQDfAL-QRelated Episode from Edge of the Nest: “Praxis” https://www.buzzsprout.com/1905380/episodes/12118331 Related Episode: “Understanding Executive Function (Praxis Part 2): https://www.buzzsprout.com/1905380/12118331Triune Brain Model: https://self-reg.ca/the-triune-brain/ Pomodora Method: https://www.todoist.com/productivity-methods/pomodoro-techniquehttps://www.asundergrad.pitt.edu/study-lab/study-skills-tools-resources/pomodoro-technique***Contact Us***Cassie Wilcox (www.thewishingwellot.com) Erica Scheifflee (https://feedingconsciousrelationships.com/)Teresa Nair (Title: Education Advisor and Speaker ; Email: [email protected] ; Social: LinkedIn Profile ) ****Music credits****Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

PDA is a concept still in its infancy in the United States. Otherwise known as Pathological Demand Avoidance, this behavior profile is often associated with autism and pervasively impacts a person’s ability to participate in meaningful everyday activities. The physiological experience becomes a powerful barrier—even in activities that a person wants to do. It’s not that a person won’t participate, it’s that they can’t. So how do we address PDA, and how do we make sure we are helping kids grow and develop all while honoring their “persistent demand for autonomy?” Join Erica, Cassie, and Teresa as we discuss:How does PDA put a magnifying glass on what humanity overall needs?The importance of asking ourselves why someone would have a pervasive or magnified need for autonomy.How do we respond to the withdrawal, oppositional, or eruptive behaviors that a child exhibits as a “demand avoidant” reaction?How do we begin communicating differently and foster “thrival”—not just survival— for PDA individuals?The power of the “flow state.”Next month we will cover the 4th episode in this 6-part series: Executive Function. **Resources**Kristy Forbes: https://www.kristyforbes.com.au/Casey Ehrlich At Peace Parents: https://bio.site/atpeaceparents?Related Episode from Edge of the Nest: “Compassionate Command” https://www.buzzsprout.com/1905380/episodes/11353565 Related Episode from Edge of the Nest: “Praxis” https://www.buzzsprout.com/1905380/episodes/12118331 **Contact Teresa**Title: Education Advisor and Speaker Email: [email protected] Social: LinkedIn Profile  ***Erica’s NEW website*** https://feedingconsciousrelationships.com/ ****Music credits****Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

Have you ever experienced anxiety? What about someone you know and love? Statistically speaking, very few people will live their entire life WITHOUT being touched by anxiety in some way. For such a small word, the topic is MASSIVE. And we're left with so many questions. Like...why do some people experience so much anxiety that it negatively impacts their lives? Is it something we must live with forever? Is it just our genetics? What can be done besides “talk therapy” and medication? In this episode, we will begin to unpack the underlying factors that lead to anxiety which helps us understand what steps to take when we are experiencing dis-ease. Join Erica, Cassie, and Teresa and learn about:What does anxiety look like across ages and individuals?What is anxiety trying to signal to us?Whole-person approaches that are available to us BEYOND medication or cognitive-behavioral therapy which includes:RelationalCommunicationSensoryGut, DietWe are only scratching the surface in this episode!And finally…how does SOME anxiety actually serve us?It's time to take your power back. Anxiety does not have to rule you, your child, or your family. After all, “the opposite of anxiety is not calm—it’s trust” (Uniquely Human) and anxiety is the perceptual loss of the sense of security. You can find your way back to wholeness. We hope you will join us.And don’t forget to check out next month’s episode where the three of us will discuss Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA). **Resources**Breaking Free of Child Anxiety and OCD: A Scientifically Proven Program for Parents by Eli R. Lebowitz (2021).Uniquely Human by Barry Prizant: https://barryprizant.com/uniquely-human/“Balance and Mental Health” blog post by Cassie Wilcox: https://www.thewishingwellot.com/blog/balance-and-mental-health Related Training: “Balancing Behavior with Relational Attunement” by Erica Scheifflee. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrKHk6Ok4J0 Related Episode from Edge of the Nest: “Compassionate Command” https://www.buzzsprout.com/1905380/episodes/11353565 Related Episode from Edge of the Nest: “Praxis” https://www.buzzsprout.com/1905380/episodes/12118331 **Contact Teresa**[email protected] ***Erica’s NEW website*** https://feedingconsciousrelationships.com/ ****Music credits****Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

To kick off Season 4 of Edge of the Nest, Erica and Cassie are bringing back a popular guest—Teresa Nair. Thanks to our listeners who loved the "Neurodivergence and Twice Exceptionality" (Season 3; #31) episode, we’ve asked Teresa to join us for several thoughtfully chosen topics that hit close to home for many families—whether they have neurotypical OR neurodivergent children. In this episode, our mini roundtable discussion is on Self-Regulation. We will discuss:The umbrella term of Self-Regulation and what it all entails. The developmental aspects of self-regulation: Understanding how we transition from co-regulation to self-regulation and the general time frames in which we see these play out in childhood. The hierarchical aspects of self-regulation:Beginning with body awarenessBuilding into emotional identification/self-knowingConnecting our internal experience to the current situation (contextual meaning)Creating an “adaptive response” to set us up for successA Parent’s Guide to supporting regulation in your child:What NOT to doBecoming an interpreter of behaviorsThe process of joint problem-solvingHow taking care of ourselves as adults/parents leads to more regulated childrenBecoming the safe place for our children to practice and home in on their self-regulation skills.Join us for our next episode where the three of us will discuss Anxiety.**Resources**Dr. Stuart Shankerhttps://self-reg.ca/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOlV_kNYAYAhttps://shop.self-reg.ca/products/reframed-self-reg-for-a-just-society Debbie Steinberg Kunz of Bright and Quirkyhttps://brightandquirky.com/about/ Debbie Reber of TiLT Parentinghttps://tiltparenting.com/about/Differently Wired: A Parent’s Guide… (https://tiltparenting.com/differently-wired-book-2/)The Yes Brain: How to Cultivate Courage, Curiosity, and Resilience in Your Child by Dan Siegel, M.D., and Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D. (https://drdansiegel.com/book/the-yes-brain/)       **Contact Teresa**[email protected]  ***Music credits***Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

We're about to kick off our fourth season here at Edge of the Nest, and we're doing things a little differently this time around. For Season 4, we are bringing back Teresa Nair to have mini roundtable talks around:Self-RegulationAnxietyPDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance)Executive FunctionSchool RefusalWriting SkillsAnd if you have any additional topic requests, we would love for you to email us! Some of our favorite past episodes have been inspired by listener requests. You can email at [email protected] us next month as we kick-off Self-Regulation as the first episode in this series.***Music credits***Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

Did you know that “rough and tumble play” is associated with greater motor, cognitive, and emotional development in children? But it goes way beyond play wrestling!Join Erica and Cassie to hear about all things rough and tumble. We will cover:What are the benefits of rough and tumble play?What constitutes rough and tumble play?What if I don’t want to or can’t wrestle with my kids?How do I keep myself and my child safe during rough and tumble play?**Resources**The Art of Roughhousing: Good Old-Fashioned Horseplay and Why Every Kid Needs It by Anthony T. DeBenedet, M.D. and Lawrence J. Cohen, PhD (2011).Smith, P. K., & StGeorge, J. M. (2022). Play fighting (rough-and-tumble play) in children: developmental and evolutionary perspectives. International Journal of Play, 12(1), 113–126. https://doi.org/10.1080/21594937.2022.2152185Pellis, S. M., & Pellis, V. C. (2007). Rough-and-Tumble Play and the Development of the Social Brain. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 16(2), 95-98. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8721.2007.00483.xCarlson, F.M. (2011). Rough Play: One of the Most Challenging Behaviors. https://www.bgnelson.com/workshops/BBGG_Canada/BigBody&ActivePlay.pdf ***Music credits***Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

Does your child struggle in school? Maybe academics are the challenge. Perhaps their difficulties are more related to the social or emotional aspects of school. Does your child have a diagnosis such as dyslexia, ADHD, autism, dysgraphia, etc? Do sensory processing challenges impact your child’s success? If any of these ring true, this episode is here to empower YOU.Join Erica and Cassie as we chat with our special guest, Teresa Nair. Teresa helps families navigate the complex journey of neurodiversity—including but not limited to those who are twice exceptional. You’ll hear about Teresa’s path from Silicon Valley to public and private education. In this jam-packed episode, we discuss:What is 2e (twice exceptional)? How do we know if our child is 2e?The power of utilizing a strength-based paradigm to support neurodivergent education and shifting away from focusing only on one’s deficits.The gifts that come with being neurodivergent. The important role neurodivergent people play in making sure our societal “tribe” thrives.Addressing the question, “What happens when the ‘traditional ways’ of child-rearing and educating are not working?” Teresa provides insight to help us stop “the continuation of struggle” and instead become curious, ask questions, find community, and explore different opportunities. If your family faces challenges with education, you don’t have to accept your current reality if it doesn’t feel right. There are options, and this episode serves as a stepping stone onto your new path.**Resources**https://www.reel2e.org/Books by Dr. Thomas Armstrong: https://www.institute4learning.com/book-table/ADHD 2.0 by Dr. Hallowell and Dr. Ratey: https://drhallowell.com/read/books-by-ned/Ross Green’s work: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jvzQQDfAL-Q Uniquely Human by Barry Prizant: https://barryprizant.com/uniquely-human/**Contact Teresa**[email protected] ***Music credits***Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT

Picky eating is a HUGE challenge that many parents face. Whether your child eats 5 or 20 foods, if mealtime is a source of stress in your household, this episode is for you. Join Erica and Cassie as they discuss:The power in APPROACHING food and asking “How Can I” support child-food interactions.Why starting with eating is NOT usually the best choice.The nuances of the child-food relationship.The many root causes of picky eating:SensoryMotorPsycho-social-emotionalNutrient deficiencies Practical tips for you to try at home with your child.**Resources**Romeo Eats (YouTube Channel for kids): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4wo2ym_a8bNaN3R8jofHawLori Overland: https://talktools.com/products/feeding-bookDr. Kay Toomey: https://sosapproachtofeeding.com/start-here-parents/Ellyn Satter: https://www.ellynsatterinstitute.org/***Music credits***Uppbeat (free for Creators!); https://uppbeat.io/t/hartzmann/clear-sky; License code: GQGN7ICA9D8IDOUT