Letting Go of a Life We Built: Behind the Decision(146)

The Connection Codes team has a conversation about the transition into 2025, sharing their insights on goals, community, and the intentional steps they’re taking for growth in the new year. They discuss the importance of connection, both within relationships and with oneself, and the small, actionable changes that can create meaningful momentum. Tera shares her word of the year—see—which is about the power of truly seeing others and allowing herself to be seen. Glenn explores the balance between responsibilities and creative passions, while Phyllis opens up about the role of community in supporting life changes. Together, they invite you to reflect, take small steps forward, and avoid staying stuck in fear or perfectionism as you navigate your own journeys into the new year. Links and Resources: To download the Core Emotion Wheel: https://www.connectioncodes.co/wheel To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-course-online Book a coaching session with Dr. Glenn: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-help Chapters: 00:00:00 – The Spark of 2025: New Year, Same Us? 00:00:44 – When Lamps Were Stage Lights: The Origin Story 00:01:15 – Dream Boards, January Guilt, and Echo's Goals 00:02:45 – Community: Why We Resist What We Need Most 00:04:53 – Intentions Without Action Are Just Wishes 00:07:55 – Isolation, Loneliness, and Late-Night Subscriptions 00:09:59 – From Isolation to Joy: The Year in Review 00:12:08 – One Word for 2025: S-E-E 00:14:33 – Balancing Dreams, Writing Novels, and Life's Checklists 00:16:48 – The Wheel That Keeps Us Grounded 00:23:23 – Zoom Calls, Fear, and a Barn in 2020 00:24:14 – Behind the Grainy Camera: Trusting the Unknown 00:24:44 – The Quiet Impact of Tera and Wes Wages 00:27:55 – Community Isn't a Buzzword—It's a Lifeline 00:31:46 – Imperfect Starts, Perfect Timing 00:34:04 – Momentum: The Small Steps That Move Mountains 00:43:19 – Teamship: When Everyone Carries the Load 00:46:03 – The Invitation: Start Small, Start Now

Tera Wages, Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill continue their conversation about how they’re navigating life’s big transitions. They reflect on the decision to sell their home of 11 years, the emotional and physical toll of letting go, and the unexpected challenges of rebuilding a new normal. Through stories of fear, exhaustion, and fleeting moments of clarity, they share how community, small steps, and vulnerability carried them through one of the most disorienting seasons of their lives. Together, they offer a reminder that meaningful change doesn’t always feel good in the moment, but it’s worth every step. Links and Resources: To download the Core Emotion Wheel: https://www.connectioncodes.co/wheel To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-course-online Book a coaching session with Dr. Glenn: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-help Chapters 00:00:00 – When the Calendar Resets, So Do We 00:01:39 – The Moment After the Big Leap 00:04:24 – What We Learned From Letting Go of Stuff 00:12:24 – Sometimes Help Looks Like a Hurricane 00:17:16 – Prepping a House, Prepping a Heart 00:22:20 – When the Offer Comes Faster Than Expected 00:25:41 – A Table, A Family, and One Last Brunch 00:26:04 – Laughter Echoes in Empty Rooms 00:27:02 – Things We Didn’t See Coming 00:28:20 – Saying Goodbye Isn’t One Moment 00:29:27 – New Holidays, Old Traditions, Big Emotions 00:31:51 – When Curiosity Feels Vulnerable 00:33:46 – Processing the Aftermath 00:40:54 – The Exercise That Held Us Together 00:46:51 – What Comes After Goodbye

Tera and Wes talk about the challenges of staying emotionally connected during the busy and often chaotic holiday season. They openly share moments of guilt, shame, and loneliness, showing how quickly small interactions can turn into emotional disconnect if left unaddressed. They discuss using the Core Emotion Wheel to break cycles of resentment and miscommunication. It’s not about avoiding conflict but recognizing the moments when connection is slipping and choosing to lean in—whether it’s over wrapping gifts, missed cues, or moments of unspoken bitterness. This conversation isn’t about holiday perfection; it’s about showing up for each other, even in the mess. Links and Resources: To download the Core Emotion Wheel: https://www.connectioncodes.co/wheel To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-course-online Book a coaching session with Dr. Glenn: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-help Chapters: 00:00:00 – When Christmas Hustle Meets Emotional Chaos 00:00:51 – Why Wes is Here (And Why Tera Thinks People Don’t Like Her) 00:02:35 – The Tool That Saves Conversations Before They Explode 00:09:32 – Holiday Stress: Silent Resentment’s Best Friend 00:15:25 – The Moment Connection Feels Like an Uphill Climb 00:16:45 – Guilt and Anger Aren’t Just Gift-Wrapped Feelings 00:17:42 – The Core Emotion Wheel in Real Time 00:18:09 – When Silence Speaks Louder Than Words 00:19:35 – The Fastest Way to Stop Emotional Drift 00:20:40 – Sexual Loneliness: The Emotion No One Talks About 00:25:33 – Small Moments, Big Repairs: Finding Compassion Again 00:26:37 – Staying Connected When the Calendar Feels Impossible 00:30:02 – Joy, Gratitude, and a Holiday Sign-Off

Phyllis and Dr. Glenn Hill, alongside Tera Wages, reflect on years of caregiving, immense responsibility, and the hidden toll of staying too long in life’s boiling pot. As she shares moments of unexpected joy, pain, and tough decisions, Phyllis talks about how recognizing and addressing pain can lead to profound change. Tera joins the conversation, helping frame the journey of shifting from “I can’t” to “I can,” challenging all of us to confront our own boiling water and embrace the courage to pursue a life that truly serves us. Links and Resources: To download the Core Emotion Wheel: https://www.connectioncodes.co/wheel To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-course-online Book a coaching session with Dr. Glenn: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-help Chapters: 00:00:00 – Shattering the “I Can’t” Mindset 00:01:05 – Cracking the Code to Connection 00:01:36 – Pain as a Silent Companion 00:03:34 – A Life-Changing Family Call 00:04:43 – The Whisper of Help 00:08:18 – When the Pool Collapsed 00:12:30 – A Breath of New Perspective 00:15:49 – The Joyful Weight of Change 00:20:12 – Confronting the Fear of Letting Go 00:24:56 – Untangling Emotions for a Fresh Start 00:30:16 – A Call to Courage

Tera, Dr. Glenn and Phyllis dive right into the deep emotional impact of hurt and how it shapes our decisions, often leading us to throw out meaningful connections. They discuss the origins of the phrase “throwing the baby out with the bathwater” and share examples where unresolved pain led to disconnection—from friendships to church experiences and even political divides. The Connection Codes team discusses the importance of staying curious, processing emotions like hurt and fear, and choosing connection over isolation. This is a very powerful conversation about making your way through personal and communal hard situations while holding onto what truly matters. Links and Resources: To download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/wheel To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-course-online Book a coaching session with Dr. Glenn: https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-help Chapters: 00:00:00 - The Weight of Hurt Unpacked 00:00:52 - Meet the Voices Behind Connection 00:01:23 - Baby, Bathwater, and a Bigger Problem 00:05:51 - Stories That Still Sting 00:11:55 - Science Meets Hurt: The Brain’s Alarm 00:13:14 - Love in the Time of Pain 00:17:35 - Faith, Hurt, and a Bigger Picture 00:22:28 - When Churches Stop Listening 00:24:45 - Conversations That Change Everything 00:26:33 - Moving Through Pain, Step by Step 00:29:02 - How Pain Creates Growth 00:32:39 - Politics, Curiosity, and Connection 00:35:52 - Healing Starts with Acknowledgment 00:43:11 - A Final Look at Connection

Tera, Dr. Glenn and Phyllis talk about the surprising ways emotions can surface and the impact they have on our lives and connections. Phyllis shares a deeply personal moment when a Broadway play unexpectedly brought her to tears, triggering memories and grief she hadn’t felt in years. Tera, Glenn, and Phyllis reflect on the Connection Codes principle that emotions happen to us, often without warning, and how embracing this truth can lead to deeper connection and healing. They also discuss how society often misjudges emotional responses, and why learning to honor and process our feelings—rather than suppress them—can transform relationships and self-understanding. Don’t miss this heartfelt conversation that reminds us how emotion shapes our human experience. Links and Resources: To download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠ To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠ Book a coaching session with Dr. Glenn: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/marriage-help⁠⁠ Chapters 00:00:00 - The Connection Codes Unveiled 00:01:23 - Phyllis Faces Unexpected Emotions 00:03:02 - A Play That Triggered the Past 00:05:16 - Grief Through the Lens of Broadway 00:08:57 - Supporting Emotions in Real Time 00:15:10 - The Depth of Emotional Pain 00:18:58 - Navigating Intense Emotional Waves 00:22:24 - A Stranger’s Unsettling Encounter 00:24:32 - What Drives Human Behavior 00:27:25 - Exploring the Core Emotion Wheel 00:30:52 - Emotions from New York Adventures 00:36:59 - Wrapping Up with Encouragement

Tera sits down with Sharon McMahon, widely known as America’s government teacher, to discuss the power of fear as a driver in politics and history. They discuss how emotions influence decision-making, the importance of warm relationships in bridging divides, and the steps individuals can take to create meaningful change in their communities. Sharon shares insights from her journey, highlights from her new book, The Small and the Mighty, and advice for navigating today’s polarized world. Links and Resources: Book a discovery call for Overwhelm Overhaul: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://calendly.com/tera-wages/30min⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about becoming a Certified Connection Codes Coach: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/certified-coach Connect with Sharon McMahon: Sharon McMahon: https://sharonmcmahon.com  Sharon on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sharonsaysso  Here’s Where It Gets Interesting Podcast: https://sharonmcmahon.com/podcast  The Small and the Mighty by Sharon McMahon: https://sharonmcmahon.com/book Chapters 00:00:00 - Meeting Sharon McMahon: America’s Government Teacher 00:01:59 - A Bold Leap into Education and Public Service 00:06:23 - How Fear Shapes History: Lessons We Need Today 00:12:30 - Fear as the Catalyst: Understanding Its Political Grip 00:17:41 - Politics Powered by Fear: Unpacking its Influence 00:27:14 - Uniting in Division: Strategies to Find Common Ground 00:29:08 - Social Media's Role in Isolation and Connection 00:34:08 - Big Impacts, Small Actions: How to Make a Difference 00:39:36 - Building a Legacy in a Digital World 00:40:46 - Stories of Unsung Heroes: Honoring Quiet Courage 00:51:13 - Supporting Roles: The Glue of Great Achievements 00:52:29 - Closing Reflections: Lessons to Take Forward⁠

Erika and Jordan Koop are back with the Connection Codes team to discuss creating meaningful connections within relationships and communities. From their initial struggles with applying Connection Codes to their eventual success in fostering a culture of emotional fluency in their northern Canadian community, their story gives you a look into both the challenges and rewards of building relational resilience. The conversation goes into the impact of vulnerability, the reality of conflict in close relationships, and steps for bringing transformative tools to others. The Koops show how connection can thrive even in the midst of personal and communal challenges. Links and Resources: Book a discovery call for Overwhelm Overhaul: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://calendly.com/tera-wages/30min⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ Learn more about becoming a Certified Connection Codes Coach: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/certified-coach⁠⁠ Connect with The Koops: Erika and Jordan on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/questforthecore Chapters 00:00:00 – The Start of a Connection Revolution 00:00:29 – Meet Jordan and Erica Koop 00:01:27 – A Message from Northern Canada 00:03:42 – The Koops’ Path to Connection Mastery 00:05:35 – Overcoming Barriers to Build Community 00:06:14 – The Key to Group Dynamics Success 00:09:01 – Profound Impacts of Connection Codes 00:16:10 – Personal Growth Through Emotional Challenges 00:27:17 – Navigating Shame and Fear in Relationships 00:28:30 – Exploring Emotional Cycles and the Pit of Despair 00:29:47 – Why Real-Time Emotional Processing Matters 00:31:23 – The Blueprint for a Supportive Community 00:34:33 – Vulnerability’s Role in Deepening Relationships 00:38:57 – Steps to Foster a Culture of Vulnerability 00:40:55 – Tangible Stories of Vulnerability at Work 00:45:12 – Empowering Community Builders with Resources 00:50:31 – Wrapping Up with Encouragement

Tera Wages and Echo Vetter Hill are discussing the realities of emotional awareness, exploring how emotions show up in our bodies and what they’re really telling us. They talk about the link between sensations and feelings, the purpose behind emotions like anger and sadness, and why we often resist our own needs. Together, they look at how facing pain can lead to real growth and how connecting with our emotions can transform relationships and self-understanding. Tera also guides you through the Core Emotion Wheel, giving you a look at a tool for identifying and processing what’s going on beneath the surface. Links and Resources: Book a discovery call for Overwhelm Overhaul: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://calendly.com/tera-wages/30min⁠⁠⁠⁠ To download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠⁠ To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠ ⁠ Learn more about becoming a Certified Connection Codes Coach: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/certified-coach⁠ Connect with Echo Hill Vetter: Echo Hill Vetter’s Substack | Letters from Nashville: ⁠https://substack.com/@echohillvetter⁠ Echo on Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/echohillvetter⁠ Schedule 1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching with Echo: ⁠https://calendly.com/echohillvetter⁠ Echo’s LinkTree: ⁠https://linktr.ee/echohillvetter Chapters: 00:00:00 — Start of the journey with Connection Codes 00:00:35 — Discovering needs with Echo Vetter Hill 00:02:42 — Emotions decoded: What do they do? 00:07:16 — Sensations and self-awareness 00:13:02 — Emotions stored in the body 00:19:14 — Differentiating acute and chronic emotional pain 00:27:40 — The surprising strength of anger 00:35:52 — Building connection: The real practice 00:36:35 — Embracing vulnerability with emotion 00:38:30 — Recognizing and managing hurt 00:38:51 — Weighing pain against growth 00:44:38 — Facing sadness and navigating loss 00:47:59 — Loneliness exposed and finding support 00:55:19 — Guilt, shame, and rewriting our actions 00:59:55 — Unlocking the Core Emotion Wheel 01:06:45 — Final reflections and encouragement

Tera welcomes the co-creator of Connection Codes, Echo Hill Vetter. She’s a trauma informed coach as well as a parenting and lead coach. Today they’re discussing the power of beliefs and how they shape our identities, often keeping us in what Echo calls a "tiny little box." As they talk about the emotional weight of Election Day, they explore why differing perspectives can feel threatening and how fear plays a central role in our reactions. Tera and Echo discuss the impact of generational experiences and challenge you to approach differing beliefs with curiosity rather than judgment. Tera shares her own journey toward openness, encouraging you to stay connected to yourself and others, even when it feels uncomfortable. Links and Resources: Book a discovery call for Overwhelm Overhaul: ⁠⁠⁠https://calendly.com/tera-wages/30min⁠⁠⁠ To download the Core Emotion Wheel: ⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠ To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/rnyne5jf⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about becoming a Certified Connection Codes Coach: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.connectioncodes.co/certified-coach Connect with Echo Hill Vetter: Echo Hill Vetter’s Substack | Letters from Nashville: https://substack.com/@echohillvetter Echo on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/echohillvetter Schedule 1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching with Echo: https://calendly.com/echohillvetter Echo’s LinkTree: https://linktr.ee/echohillvetter Chapters: 00:00:00 - Election Day Reflections and Emotional Intensity 00:01:58 - Exploring How Beliefs Shape Identity 00:03:22 - The Role of Fear in Feeling Safe 00:04:43 - When Beliefs No Longer Fit 00:08:19 - Echo’s Personal Journey with Shifting Beliefs 00:10:13 - Finding Connection through Curiosity 00:14:58 - Using Emotional Awareness to Bridge Differences 00:20:33 - Discovering Common Ground Through Shared Fears 00:27:15 - Core Emotion Wheel: A Tool for Connection 00:30:47 - Final Reflections on Staying Connected