How to Deal With Emotionally Immature People (Including Maybe Your Own Parents) | Lindsay C. Gibson

Emotionally immature people can wreck your life. One of our most popular guests returns to teach you how to make sure they don't.Description: Our relationships are the most important variable in our health and happiness, but they may also be the most difficult. This is especially true when those closest to us turn out to be emotionally immature people.Lindsay C. Gibson is a clinical psychologist and bestselling author who specializes in helping people identify and deal with emotionally immature people, or EIP’s. Her first appearance on our show was one of our most popular episodes of 2022. Now she’s back to offer concrete strategies for handling the EIP’s in your life, wherever you may find them. Her new book is called Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People.In this episode we talk about:A primer on the cardinal characteristics of emotionally immature people (EIP’s), how to spot them, and why you might want toWhat Lindsay means by “disentangling” from EIP’s, and how to do itWhat often happens to your own sense of self when you’re in relationship (or even just in conversation) with an EIP How to interact with an EIP How to prevent brain scramble when you’re talking with someone who isn’t making any attempt to understand what you’re saying  How she reacts when she comes across EIP’s in her everyday lifeWhether it’s possible to have some immature characteristics without being an EIPHandling your own emotionally immature tendencies  Whether or not EIP’s can changeThe limits of estrangementWhy she encourages “alternatives to forgiveness”Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/lindsay-gibson-791Book Mentioned:Disentangling from Emotionally Immature PeopleOther Resources Mentioned:Lindsay’s first appearance on the Ten Percent Happier PodcastAdditional Resources:Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/installSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today’s guest, Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson, gives advice for dealing with emotionally immature people— whether they are your parents, boss, spouse or childhood friend, she offers practical tools to help navigate these difficult relationships. Description: Emotionally immature people (EIP’s) are hard to avoid and most of us, if not all of us, have to deal with them at some point in our lives. These interactions can range from mildly annoying to genuinely traumatic, especially if the emotionally immature people in question are our own parents, which is true for an awful lot of us.Today’s guest, clinical psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson, gives advice for dealing with emotionally immature people, whether they’re your parents or not. She has written a sleeper hit book on the subject called, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents. In this episode we talk about:The signs of emotional immaturityWhether or not I’m emotionally immatureWhat happens to children who are raised by emotionally immature parents, including their signature coping strategiesWhy adult children of EIP’s turn to healing fantasies, and how to let them goHow to cope with emotionally immature parents as an adultWhat role compassion should and should not play in your relationship with EIP’sHow to healFull Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/lindsay-gibson-2022-rerunBooks Mentioned:Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved ParentsWho You Were Meant to Be: A Guide to Rediscovering Your Life's PurposeRecovering from Emotionally Immature Parents: Practical Tools to Establish Boundaries and Reclaim Your Emotional AutonomySelf-Care for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: Honor Your Emotions, Nurture Your Self, and Live with ConfidenceDisentangling from Emotionally Immature People: Avoid Emotional Traps, Stand Up for Your Self, and Transform Your Relationships as an Adult Child of Emotionally Immature Parents Other Resources Mentioned:Lisa Feldman BarrettAdditional Resources:Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/installSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

To find some mental stability, start with physical stability.About Oren Jay Sofer:Oren Jay Sofer teaches mindfulness, meditation and Nonviolent Communication. He has practiced meditation since 1997, beginning his studies in Bodh Gaya, India and is a long-time student of Joseph Goldstein, Michele McDonald, and Ajahn Sucitto, and is a graduate of the IMS/Spirit Rock Teacher Training program. Oren teaches retreats across the country and works as Senior Program Developer at Mindful Schools, teaching and developing curricula for one of the international leaders of mindfulness in education.To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Ground Hope In Your Body.”See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A self-described “silly man” tells us about what’s really important in life. Ted Danson has an acting career spanning over four decades. He rose to prominence in the 1980s with his iconic portrayal of Sam Malone in the long-running sitcom "Cheers," earning him critical acclaim and multiple awards. Danson's charisma and acting prowess have since led him to a myriad of diverse roles, including his Emmy-nominated performances in "Damages" and "Fargo." Most recently, he starred in the existential comedy “The Good Place.” Beyond his acting career, Danson is also celebrated for his environmental activism and philanthropy, demonstrating a commitment to making a positive impact beyond the screen. His next venture? A podcast with his old “Cheers” buddy, Woody Harrelson.In this episode we talk about:meditationmarriagehypochondriagriefwhat he means when he calls himself a joy junkiewhat he learned from being on the TV show “The Good Place”and that time he did shrooms with his fellow cast members on “Cheers”Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter hereFollow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTokTen Percent Happier online bookstoreSubscribe to our YouTube ChannelOur favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular EpisodesFull Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/ted-dansonAdditional Resources:Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/installSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Practical tips to stop judging yourself, chill out about exercise, and start taking better care of your body – from a Buddhist teacher who learned the hard way.Description: It’s an urgent question for so many of us: Can we exercise, can we take care of our bodies, without being driven by shame, self-loathing, or noxious comparison to other people?Our guest today has a unique perspective on this. Cara Lai is a former social worker and psychotherapist who is now a Buddhist teacher. She also used to be a marathoner. But in the last few years, her body has undergone some radical changes, leading her to some hard-won, fascinating, and deeply useful insights about how to strike the balance between taking care of your body and staying sane.In this episode we talk about:Practices for that moment when you’re getting out of the shower, see yourself in the mirror, and engage in a festival of self-judgmentThe surprising things that happened when Cara was forced to stop exercisingA counterintuitive mindfulness practice suggestion for those with exercise routinesWhen and why you should purposely do things you know are bad for youWhy we often resist ‘being in our bodies,’ why that’s OK, and how to lower the bar on this contemplative cliché–without giving it upA body-related Buddhist practice she finds to be totally not usefulFull Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/cara-lai-787Other Resources Mentioned:The Upside of Desire | Cara LaiThe Anti-Diet | Evelyn TriboleAdditional Resources:Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/installSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What if one of the often overlooked keys to being productive is being lazy? That’s the case you will hear made today by Brother Pháp Hữu, a very impressive young zen Buddhist monk.Brother Pháp Hữu is a senior Dharma teacher in Thich Nhat Hanh’s International Plum Village Community and abbot of Upper Hamlet, the monks’ community in Plum Village Monastery, a practice center founded by Thich Nhat Hanh in southwest France. Born in Vietnam, he emigrated to Canada as a child. He began training with Thich Nhat Hanh at the age of thirteen when he first entered the monastery to become a monk. Thich Nhat Hanh gave him the name Chân Pháp Hữu, which means “True Dharma Friend.” For more than ten years, he accompanied Thich Nhat Hanh on his international teaching tours as his attendant and assistant. Today, Brother Pháp Hữu is deeply committed to building community and continuing Thich Nhat Hanh’s legacy, bringing his teachings in particular to businesspeople, families, and young adults. Brother Phap Huu is passionate about basketball, music, and developing new approaches to teamwork, leadership, mentoring and coaching, and is a beloved co-host—with journalist, leadership coach, and workshop facilitator Jo Confino--of the Plum Village podcast, The Way Out is In.In this episode we talk about:The origin and purpose of something called Lazy DayWhat doing nothing looks like in practicalityWhy doing nothing is so hard for peopleHow you can integrate the wisdom of lazy days into your life, even if you can’t carve out a whole dayHow laziness in and of itself can be productive and how it allows for a re-examination of our own happiness.And The geopolitical case for being vs. doingRelated Episodes:The Buddha’s 8-Part Manual for a Good Life | Brother Pháp DungHow to Suffer Well | Brother Pháp DungThis Episode Will Make You Stronger | Sister Dang NghiemSix Buddhist Strategies for Getting Along Better with Everyone | Sister True Dedication3 Buddhist Strategies for When the News is Overwhelming | Kaira Jewel LingoA Buddhist Recipe for Handling Turmoil | Kaira Jewel LingoSign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter hereFollow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTokTen Percent Happier online bookstoreSubscribe to our YouTube ChannelOur favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular EpisodesFull Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/br-phap-huuAdditional Resources:Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/installSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

While we may want to conquer physical pain, it’s actually observing the sensations and knowing when to take a break that’s the key to relief.About Sharon Salzberg:Sharon Salzberg is a meditation pioneer, world-renowned teacher, and New York Times bestselling author. She is among the first to bring mindfulness & lovingkindness meditation to mainstream American culture fifty years ago, inspiring generations of meditation teachers and wellness influencers.A co-founder of The Insight Meditation Society in Barre, MA, Sharon is the author of thirteen books, including the New York Times bestseller, Real Happiness, now in its second edition, and her seminal work, Lovingkindess.In 2023, Sharon released two new books: Real Life, available from Flatiron Books, and Finding Your Way, a small gift book from Workman.To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “When Your Body Hurts.”See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this show, we talk a lot about ways to stop the interpersonal and intrapersonal violence of obsessing about thinness. Today’s episode, though, is a bit of a departure… because this whole dynamic and debate has been deeply disrupted by the advent of Ozempic and other new weight loss drugs, which are technically called GLP1s. This is a controversial and touchy subject, to say the least. Journalist and best-selling author Johann Hari discusses his latest book Magic Pill: The Extraordinary Benefits and Disturbing Risks of the New Weight-Loss Drugs. He believes drugs like Ozempic are the equivalent of the invention of the iPhone – and will impact all of our lives, whether we like it or not, and whether we take them or not. And in Magic Pill, Hari – who somewhat ambivalently takes Ozempic himself – marinates in the complexity of all of this. This is Hari’s third time on the show. He has come on before to discuss his books on distraction and depression—entitled Stolen Focus and Lost Connections.This is the latest episode of our Get Fit Sanely series. This is the third time we’ve done Get Fit Sanely, and in this go-round, we’ll be covering longevity, exercise, and the Buddhist case for laziness. Related Episodes:Get Fit Sanely PlaylistWhy You Can't Pay Attention - And How to Think About It | Johann HariFighting Depression with Social Connection | Johann HariSign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter hereFollow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTokTen Percent Happier online bookstoreSubscribe to our YouTube ChannelOur favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular EpisodesFull Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/johann-hari-2024See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Five takeaways from a year's reporting on fitness, and why this journalist says it's time to go easier on yourself.Shannon Palus is a features editor at Slate covering heath, science, and human interest. In 2023, she edited Slate's year-long fitness column, Good Fit, about exercise. Her writing has also appeared in the New York Times' Wirecutter, Scientific American, and the Atlantic. In this episode we talk about:How this conversation changed the way Dan thinks about exerciseWhy you shouldn’t drive yourself crazy following the latest trends about health and fitnessWhy tracking your workouts isn’t always helpful - and remembering that there is always the option to “go slow.” The importance of remembering that exercise is not one-size-fits-all Related Episodes:Can You Get Fit Without Self-Loathing? | Cara Lai — Ten Percent Happier How to Stop Obsessing Over Your Body and Eat Sanely in a Toxic Culture | Virginia Sole-Smith — Ten Percent Happier Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter hereFollow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTokTen Percent Happier online bookstoreSubscribe to our YouTube ChannelOur favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular EpisodesFull Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/shannon-palusAdditional Resources:Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/installSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

After an intense day, try this simple meditation to decompress and de-stress by getting comfy and putting your feet up.About Jeff Warren:Jeff is an incredibly gifted meditation teacher. He's trained in multiple traditions, including with renowned teacher Shinzen Young. Jeff is the co-author of NY Times Bestseller "Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics," and the founder of the Consciousness Explorers Club, a meditation adventure group in Toronto. He has a knack for surfacing the exact meditation that will help everyone he meets. "I have a meditation for that" is regularly heard from Jeff, so we've dubbed him the "Meditation MacGyver."To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “End of Day Decompress: The Porch Sit.”See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.