Ep# 143: Top Level Satisfaction, Enjoyment, and Meaning

Just as we have different “levels” of relationships, we also have different levels of satisfaction, enjoyment, and meaning in your life. You have a limited amount of time, energy, and resources to invest and if we haven’t identified our “essential few” priorities, we will exist in lives driven by obligation versus whole-hearted commitments.  We all have a relationship to our own happiness. And, according to author and teacher, Arthur C. Brooks, there are three “macronutrients” which make evident that “happiness” is the state toward which we’re making progress: The Three Macronutrients Enjoyment (Pleasure + people + memory): It is not just what feels good in the moment, but experiences that combine sensory pleasure with social connection and lasting memory. Satisfaction (The joy of achievement): The deep reward you get from accomplishing something difficult after going through the struggle. (As Brooks notes, "The pursuit of pleasure is not the secret to happiness. It's the secret to rehab".) Meaning (Coherence, purpose, and significance): The underlying sense that your life matters, why you are here, and that you have a purpose to serve.  I invite you to consider these questions: Which experiences in your life check the boxes for sensory pleasure + social connection + lasting memories? Which experiences in your life check the box of achievement earned through accomplishing something difficult? Which experiences check the boxes for coherence/integrity (your insides match your outsides), purpose, and significance?   FREE GUIDE Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide: My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]  

Have you ever caught yourself saying things like: I don't know why I'm so overwhelmed. I should be handling this better. Why don't I want to do the things I know I need to do? Why am I so tired? Today, I want to offer you a phrase that might change the way you respond to yourself. “Of course.” Of course I'm overwhelmed. Of course this feels hard. Of course I don't want to do one more thing for somebody else right now. Of course I'm tired. Of course I'm having feelings about this transition in my life. These two words are the difference between fighting your experience and acknowledging it.  What Are We Really Saying When We Say "Of Course"? When you say, "Of course I'm exhausted," you're giving yourself permission to acknowledge the demands you've been carrying. When you say, "Of course I don't want to do one more thing," you're allowing yourself to recognize that your capacity has limits. When you say, "Of course I'm overwhelmed," you're acknowledging that there may be more coming at you than you can comfortably process right now. And when you say, "Of course I'm struggling with this transition," you're making room for the fact that something can be good and still be difficult. These statements don't mean you're helpless. They don't mean you can't change anything. They mean you're starting from an honest assessment of your experience instead of an argument about what you should be feeling. And that can create room for a different response. Saying "of course" isn't just about giving yourself permission to feel something. It also asks you to consider what that feeling might be telling you. If you're exhausted, perhaps you need rest, support, or a more realistic set of expectations. If you're overwhelmed, perhaps you need to reduce the number of decisions you're making or decide what can wait. If you don't want to keep giving to everyone, perhaps you need to examine your boundaries and figure out which commitments you're choosing and which ones you're carrying out of obligation. If you're feeling unsettled now that your children are grown, perhaps you need space to explore what you want this next season to look like. The feeling doesn't dictate the answer. But it deserves to be heard before you decide what to do. And sometimes, when you stop criticizing yourself for having a feeling, you can finally get curious about what you need. When you hear yourself saying, "I should be handling this better," pause. Try finishing one of these sentences: Of course I'm feeling this way, because... Of course this is hard, given... Of course I don't want to do this right now, because... And then ask yourself: Given how I'm feeling, what would be a helpful and honest next step? Maybe it's doing the task. Maybe it's postponing it. Maybe it's asking for help, setting a boundary, getting some rest, or acknowledging a feeling you've been trying to talk yourself out of. The answer will depend on the situation. The important thing is that you're responding to yourself with curiosity instead of criticism. And remember, giving yourself permission to feel something doesn't mean you have to act on every feeling. It means you can acknowledge what's happening without shaming yourself for it. You can be overwhelmed and still make a plan. You can be tired and still honor an important commitment. You can love your family and need some time alone. You can be grateful for your life and still want something to change. Two things can be true at once. So the next time you find yourself wondering why you're struggling, try a different opening. Instead of asking, "What's wrong with me?" Try asking, "Given everything I'm carrying, of course I'm feeling this way. What do I need to understand, and what would help me now?" You don't have to earn the right to have feelings. You don't have to prove that you're struggling enough to deserve some compassion. And you don't have to turn every difficult moment into another opportunity to improve yourself. Sometimes the first step forward is simply to stop fighting where you are. Of course this is hard. Of course you're tired. Of course you're figuring things out. You're a human being living through a season of change. Start there. Until next time, give yourself the same curiosity and compassion you would offer someone you love. And if you're listening to this and thinking of a friend who might need this conversation… please share this episode with her.  Because sometimes the most comforting thing you can say to another woman is simply: "It's not just you." FREE GUIDE Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide: My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]

Feeling Saturated? The Four S’s to Help You Reset Ever feel like a sponge sitting in the sink beneath a drippy faucet? You’ve absorbed so much that you simply can’t take in one more thing. Mentally and emotionally, you’re saturated. In this episode, I explore four simple ways to create space when life feels like too much: Silence, Stillness, Space, and Solitude. Discover how these four S’s can help you pause, release the pressure, and make room to breathe again. Because sometimes, you don’t need to do more. You need a little less.   And if you're listening to this and thinking of a friend who might need this conversation… please share this episode with her.  Because sometimes the most comforting thing you can say to another woman is simply: "It's not just you." FREE GUIDE Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide: My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]  

When your kids are grown, it’s easy for life to revolve around home, work, and caring for others. A third place is where you connect with friends, build community, and nurture a sense of belonging outside your everyday responsibilities. It doesn’t have to be a physical place—it just needs to be a space where you can connect, recharge, and enjoy life in this second season. And if you're listening to this and thinking of a friend who might need this conversation… please share this episode with her.  Because sometimes the most comforting thing you can say to another woman is simply: "It's not just you." FREE GUIDE Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide: My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]  

Have you ever wondered if you still matter as much as you used to? Because I think there is something about this season of life that can bring that question to the surface. For many of us, we have spent decades being needed. Our children needed us. Our families needed us. Our homes needed us. We were the ones remembering the appointments, planning the holidays, solving the problems, and making sure everyone was taken care of. We had a role. We had a purpose. And even when it was exhausting, there was something reassuring about knowing that we mattered to other people. And then things begin to change. Our children grow up. They leave home. They build their own lives. They don't need us in the same ways they once did. And we can be incredibly proud of them and happy for them while also feeling a little lost ourselves. Because somewhere along the way, we may have confused being needed with mattering. And those two things are not the same. Being needed is about what someone needs from you. Mattering is about the value you bring simply by being who you are. But if you have spent years measuring your importance by how much other people depend on you, it can be difficult to know what to do when that dependence changes. You might find yourself asking, Who am I now? What is my role? Where do I fit? Does anyone really need what I have to offer anymore? And I think we need to be honest about those questions rather than immediately trying to put a positive spin on them. There can be grief in this transition. There can be loneliness. There can be a real loss of identity. And there can also be an opportunity. What if this second season isn't about finding new people who need us in exactly the same way? What if it's about discovering new ways to contribute, connect, and participate in the world? Maybe it's mentoring someone. Maybe it's creating something you've always wanted to create. Maybe it's developing friendships that have nothing to do with your role as a mother. Maybe it's sharing your experience, your wisdom, your humor, or your particular way of seeing the world. Maybe it's simply showing up somewhere regularly, getting to know people, and becoming part of something bigger than yourself. I think this is one reason community matters so much in this season. We need places where we aren't just someone's mother, someone's wife, or the person who takes care of everything. We need places where we can be known as ourselves. And here's something else I've been thinking about: We don't have to earn our right to matter by becoming more productive. We don't have to launch a business, write a book, volunteer for every committee, or find some grand new purpose to justify our existence. Our value isn't measured by how useful we can make ourselves. But we are human beings who need connection, contribution, and a sense that our lives have meaning. And we can intentionally create more opportunities for those things in this season. So here's the question I'd like you to consider: Where in your life do you feel that you still matter, and where might you be longing to matter in a new way? Not where are you needed. Not where are you indispensable. Where do you feel connected? Where do you feel engaged? Where do you feel that what you bring to the world has value? And if those places are missing right now, what is one small step you could take to begin creating them? You don't have to figure out your entire second season today. You just have to be willing to consider that your story isn't over because your old role has changed. You are not finished contributing. You are not finished growing. And you are not finished discovering who you can become. Your children can need you differently. Your relationships can change. Your life can look completely different from the one you imagined twenty years ago. And you can still matter deeply. Part of thriving in this next season is learning to build a life in which you matter not just because of what you do for everyone else, but because of the life you are creating for yourself.   And if you're listening to this and thinking of a friend who might need this conversation… please share this episode with her.  Because sometimes the most comforting thing you can say to another woman is simply: "It's not just you." FREE GUIDE Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide: My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]

What if you’re waiting to feel confident or motivated before you’re willing to take the next step—but confidence and momentum actually come after you begin? In this episode, I’m talking about what it really means to start something before you feel ready. We often think confidence is something we need to have before we put ourselves out there. But confidence requires evidence. If I want to believe that I’m someone who is willing to try something new, take a risk, or put myself out there, I have to create that evidence through my actions. The same is true for momentum. We wait for motivation to arrive. We wait until we feel excited, energized, or ready to begin a new chapter. But momentum doesn’t usually come first. Momentum comes from being in motion. In this episode, I connect these ideas to my upcoming group coaching program and speak directly to the woman who may be considering joining but is telling herself: “I’m not confident enough.” “I’m not motivated enough.” “Maybe I should wait until I feel more ready.” What if you don't need to feel ready before you begin? What if taking the first step is how you begin to become the woman who does these things? In this episode, we’ll explore: Why confidence is built through evidence and experience How taking action can change the way you see yourself Why we often wait for motivation before starting something new How momentum is created through movement—not waiting What it means to start before you feel completely ready Why joining something new can feel uncomfortable even when you genuinely want the experience How these ideas apply to entering a new season of life If you’re standing at the edge of something new and telling yourself you need to feel more confident, motivated, or ready first, this episode is for you. You may not need more confidence. You may simply need a first step. And that first step can become the evidence that creates the confidence you were waiting for.

If this episode resonated with you, take a minute to look at the information for MY KIDS ARE GROWN. NOW WHAT? You can scan the QR CODE on the flyer or use this link to access the sign-up page and learn more about this in-person, group coaching experience: My Kids Are Grown - Now What? Group Coaching Program And if you're listening to this and thinking of a friend who might need this conversation… please share this episode with her.  Because sometimes the most comforting thing you can say to another woman is simply: "It's not just you." FREE GUIDE Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide: My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]  

The Drama Triangle vs. Empowerment Dynamic The Drama Triangle is a model of relational dynamics created by psychiatrist Stephen Karpman in 1968. It was developed to help us recognize three recurring roles people can fall into during stressful or conflict-filled interactions: Victim, Rescuer, and Persecutor.  The Empowerment Dynamic The Empowerment Dynamic (TED*) was developed by David Emerald as an alternative to the Drama Triangle. It offers three more empowering roles—Creator, Coach, and Challenger—designed to shift relationships away from helplessness, rescuing, and blame and toward agency, ownership, and personal responsibility.  Drama Triangle: “How do we make this problem go away?” Empowerment Dynamic: “How do we help the person develop the capacity to handle this?” One of the most important distinctions in supporting adult children is not simply how much we help, but the role we're stepping into when we help. The Drama Triangle can pull us into three roles: VICTIM: “I can't handle this.” RESCUER: “I'll handle it for you.” PERSECUTOR: “You shouldn't have gotten yourself into this mess.” The Empowerment Dynamic offers a different way of responding: CREATOR: “What can I do about this?” COACH: “How can I support you in figuring this out?” CHALLENGER: “What might you need to take responsibility for here?” The difference isn't helping vs. not helping. It's taking over vs. helping your adult child remain in ownership of their life. AM I HELPING, SUPPORTING & EMPOWERING — OR RESCUING? When you're tempted to jump in, ask yourself: About responsibility Is this my responsibility—or theirs? Could my child reasonably solve this themselves? Have they actually asked for help? About my motivation Am I helping because they genuinely need support—or because I don't want to watch them struggle? Am I responding to their need—or my own discomfort? Am I trying to make the problem go away? About capacity Will my intervention increase or decrease my child's capacity? Will I be helping them think through options—or making the decision for them? Will they remain an active participant in solving the problem? About the nature of the help Is the help temporary, defined, and purposeful? Would they make the same choice if I weren't available to pay for it? Can I stay connected without taking ownership of the problem? And perhaps the hardest question: Am I preventing a genuinely harmful consequence—or am I preventing my child from experiencing discomfort because I can't tolerate watching them struggle? THE NORTH STAR How can I love my adult child in a way that leaves them more capable, not less? That, ultimately, is the shift from rescuing to empowering. Questions to Ask Yourself When you're deciding whether to step in: What exactly is my job now? How can I support my child in becoming more capable of handling this? Is my support helping my child become more capable—or helping my child avoid becoming more capable? Can I afford to help—and more importantly, is helping actually helpful? What do you think you're going to do? Is this an uncomfortable consequence—or is this an unsafe situation? Would you like me to listen, brainstorm with you, or help you think through your options? Questions That Keep Your Adult Child in Ownership What can I do about this? How can I support you in figuring this out? What might you need to take responsibility for here? What do you think you want to do? If you want to be able to cover your rent independently, what needs to change? Does my child have a plan? Is this help temporary or open-ended? Does my child understand what things cost? Are they making reasonable efforts toward independence? Am I helping because they genuinely need help—or because I don't want to watch them struggle? Would they make the same choice if I weren't available to pay for it? Will my intervention increase or decrease my child's capacity? The “Am I Helping or Rescuing?” Check Before you jump in, ask: Is there actual danger? Is this my responsibility or theirs? Could they reasonably solve this themselves? Have they actually asked for help? Will my intervention increase or decrease their capacity? Is the help temporary, defined and purposeful? Am I preventing a genuinely harmful consequence—or am I preventing my child from experiencing discomfort because I can't tolerate watching them struggle? And Maybe the Biggest Question How can I love my adult child in a way that leaves them more capable, not less? FREE GUIDE Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide: My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]

When our kids become adults, our job changes—but our love doesn’t. The challenge is learning how to stay supportive and connected without taking over their lives. In this episode, we talk about: The difference between supporting and rescuing Why allowing normal struggle can help young adults build confidence and capacity The Green Light / Yellow Light / Red Light framework for knowing when to step in The question that can change everything: “Will my intervention increase or decrease my child's capacity?” Here are a list of questions from the episode for your consideration: Questions to Ask Yourself When you're deciding whether to step in: What exactly is my job now? How can I support my child in becoming more capable of handling this? Is my support helping my child become more capable—or helping my child avoid becoming more capable? Can I afford to help—and more importantly, is helping actually helpful? What do you think you're going to do? Is this an uncomfortable consequence—or is this an unsafe situation? Would you like me to listen, brainstorm with you, or help you think through your options? Questions That Keep Your Adult Child in Ownership What can I do about this? How can I support you in figuring this out? What might you need to take responsibility for here? What do you think you want to do? If you want to be able to cover your rent independently, what needs to change? Does my child have a plan? Is this help temporary or open-ended? Does my child understand what things cost? Are they making reasonable efforts toward independence? Am I helping because they genuinely need help—or because I don't want to watch them struggle? Would they make the same choice if I weren't available to pay for it? Will my intervention increase or decrease my child's capacity? The “Am I Helping or Rescuing?” Check Before you jump in, ask: Is there actual danger? Is this my responsibility or theirs? Could they reasonably solve this themselves? Have they actually asked for help? Will my intervention increase or decrease their capacity? Is the help temporary, defined and purposeful? Am I preventing a genuinely harmful consequence—or am I preventing my child from experiencing discomfort because I can't tolerate watching them struggle? And Maybe the Biggest Question How can I love my adult child in a way that leaves them more capable, not less?   Free Guide Want a simple way to know when to step in—and when to allow the struggle? Download my free guide HERE- My Adult Child Is Struggling - When Should I Step In? Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]

Men Have Crises. Women Unravel. What if what we call a “midlife crisis” is actually something very different for women? Brené Brown describes midlife as an unraveling—a gradual realization that the roles, expectations, and coping strategies that once served us may no longer fit the woman we've become. For women, especially after years of active motherhood, this season can bring some uncomfortable questions: Who am I now? What do I actually want? What no longer fits? What have I been doing because I want to—and what have I been doing because I thought I was supposed to? In this episode, we explore why feeling restless, unsettled, or uncertain doesn't necessarily mean something is wrong. Maybe you're not having a crisis. Maybe you're simply outgrowing an old version of your life. And maybe you don't need to blow everything up. Maybe you just need to get curious. Because the second season isn't necessarily about becoming someone new. It's about becoming more honest about who you've become—and intentionally deciding what comes next. In this episode: Why “midlife crisis” may be the wrong framework for women What it means to unravel rather than fall apart The identities and coping strategies we may have outgrown Why our kids growing up can bring identity questions to the surface How to recognize “this doesn't fit anymore” as information, not failure Questions to help you begin designing your next season The question to take with you: Who am I when I'm not simply being who everyone else needs me to be?   Ever wonder why you sometimes feel overwhelmed and wired, while other times you feel shut down and exhausted? The Window of Tolerance can help you understand what’s happening in your nervous system—and what you can do next. In my new free resource, The Window of Tolerance Quick Shot, I’ll pour you a simple, step-by-step guide designed to help you take little sips of information, notice your personal patterns, and experiment with what helps you regulate. You’ll learn: Why the Window of Tolerance matters The simplest way to use it: Do I have too much energy or too little? How to begin noticing your own signs Why the goal isn't to find the “right” tool—but to discover what works for you Download the free Window of Tolerance Quick Shot and take a little sip at a time: Window of Tolerance Quick Shot If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support as you navigate a midlife unraveling, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link: Coaching Call with Terri Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you.  If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast.  Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode.  My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour: Intentional Intoxication Book If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat: [email protected]