Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky: Why You Don’t Feel Loved (Even When You Are)

On this episode of We’re Out of Time, host Richard Taite is joined by ADHD coach and advocate Jheri South to break down how ADHD shows up far beyond attention and focus. Jheri explains how emotional dysregulation, rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD), and impulsivity shape everyday life, relationships, parenting, and even addiction risk.The conversation begins with RSD, or rejection sensitive dysphoria, which affects an estimated 99% of people with ADHD. Jheri explains how perceived rejection can trigger intense emotional spirals that feel physically and emotionally overwhelming, often leading to conflict in romantic relationships, work environments, and family dynamics.Richard and Jheri explore how ADHDers can misinterpret neutral situations as personal rejection, leading to impulsive reactions, shame, and difficulty regulating emotions. Jheri emphasizes that ADHD is less about attention and more about emotional regulation, identity, and belief systems.They discuss practical tools, including identifying triggers, learning to pause before reacting, and recognizing “episodes” of emotional dysregulation. Jheri also shares five key drivers that engage the ADHD brain: interest, urgency, challenge/competition, novelty, and rivalry.The conversation expands into relationships, where communication differences, especially between ADHD and autism, can lead to misunderstandings and shutdown cycles. Jheri explains how shifting from blame to understanding communication styles can transform relationships.They also address ADHD and addiction risk, noting that individuals with ADHD are 3–4x more likely to struggle with substance use due to dopamine-seeking behavior when untreated.In parenting, Jheri shares how separating connection time from correction, avoiding escalation during emotional episodes, and building emotional safety can dramatically improve outcomes for children with ADHD and RSD.Ultimately, Jheri reframes ADHD not as a deficit, but as a neurodivergent wiring that, when understood and regulated, can become a powerful strength in life, relationships, and success.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, Richard Taite sits down with world-renowned happiness expert Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky to break down the biggest myths about happiness—and why so many people feel unloved, even when they are.Dr. Lyubomirsky reveals the science behind what actually creates lasting happiness, why money can make you happy (but only to a point), and the surprising reason connection—not success—is what truly fulfills us.They dive deep into the psychology of love: why most people struggle to feel it, how your conversations shape your relationships, and the simple mindset shifts that can create immediate change. From radical curiosity to vulnerability, this episode is a masterclass in how to build deeper, more meaningful connections.If you’ve ever felt unseen, disconnected, or like something is missing—this conversation will change the way you think about love, happiness, and the people in your life.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, host Richard Taite sits down with actor and decorated Marine veteran Maurice P. Kerry for a raw and deeply personal conversation about survival, identity, and transformation after war.Maurice opens up about the harsh realities of combat during Operation Iraqi Freedom and the mindset that kept him alive—“complacency kills.” But the battle didn’t end overseas. From being cheated on while serving his country to returning home and facing homelessness, Maurice shares the unseen struggles many veterans endure when transitioning back to civilian life.He speaks candidly about PTSD, not as a weakness, but as something he’s learned to harness, and reflects on how the Marine Corps ultimately saved him from a very different path. Now, as an actor on CBS’ Beyond The Gates, Maurice is using his platform to tell stories that matter and bring respect back to those who serve.This episode also dives into his personal life—being born from an affair, feeling unwanted, and raising his child as a single father for 16 years—all while navigating purpose, discipline, and growth. Maurice’s story is one of resilience, accountability, and redefining what it means to survive—and truly live.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, host Richard Taite sits down with actor and decorated Marine veteran Maurice P. Kerry for a raw and deeply personal conversation about survival, identity, and transformation after war.Maurice opens up about the harsh realities of combat during Operation Iraqi Freedom and the mindset that kept him alive—“complacency kills.” But the battle didn’t end overseas. From being cheated on while serving his country to returning home and facing homelessness, Maurice shares the unseen struggles many veterans endure when transitioning back to civilian life.He speaks candidly about PTSD, not as a weakness, but as something he’s learned to harness, and reflects on how the Marine Corps ultimately saved him from a very different path. Now, as an actor on CBS’ Beyond The Gates, Maurice is using his platform to tell stories that matter and bring respect back to those who serve.This episode also dives into his personal life—being born from an affair, feeling unwanted, and raising his child as a single father for 16 years—all while navigating purpose, discipline, and growth. Maurice’s story is one of resilience, accountability, and redefining what it means to survive—and truly live.

On this episode of We're Out Of Time, Richard Taite sits down with psychologist and bestselling author Dr. Guy Winch to explore why emotional pain is one of the most overlooked — and dangerous — forces in human life.Dr. Winch breaks down the science of emotional first aid, explaining why we treat physical injuries with urgency but leave emotional wounds to fester until they quietly destroy our confidence, our relationships, and our health. He reveals why burnout is now killing hundreds of thousands of people a year, why loneliness is far more psychologically damaging than most people realize, and why the brain responds to heartbreak in ways that are strikingly similar to heroin withdrawal.Richard gets personal in this one — sharing his own experience with rejection and love addiction — and Dr. Winch walks him through exactly what's happening psychologically and what to do about it. The two also dig into why so many people unknowingly turn to addictive behaviors to cope with emotional pain they've never properly addressed, and why failure — if left unexamined — can quietly redirect the entire course of someone's life.This episode is packed with practical, immediately usable tools anyone can apply today — from a daily gratitude practice that actually works to understanding the difference between waiting out heartbreak and actively healing from it. Dr. Winch doesn't just explain what's wrong. He tells you what to do about it.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, Richard Taite sits down with legendary comedian, actor, and activist Margaret Cho for a raw and unfiltered conversation about addiction, relapse, and survival.Margaret opens up about her decades-long journey with substance abuse, including relapsing after seven years of sobriety and the dangerous mindset that can come with addiction. She speaks candidly about the realities of drug use, the dark humor that often surrounds it, and why so many comedians struggle with substance abuse behind the scenes.The two also explore the connection between comedy and neurodivergence, the loneliness of life on the road, and how the industry can unintentionally fuel addictive behaviors. Margaret shares her perspective on modern culture, navigating outrage in comedy, and how she continues to push boundaries while staying authentic to herself.They also dive into emerging conversations around GLP-1 medications and their potential role in impulse control, as well as Margaret’s personal experience using them to manage binge eating disorder.In the end, Margaret reflects on what she’s most proud of today—and it’s not the fame or success. It’s the fact that she’s still here. Margaret Cho’s story is a powerful reminder that survival itself can be the greatest accomplishment.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, host Richard Taite sits down with COVID survivor Gregg Garfield to share one of the most extraordinary survival stories from the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic.Gregg recounts the moment everything changed while on a ski trip in the Italian Alps—when a warning call from his girlfriend first mentioned a mysterious virus spreading through Europe. Within days, flu-like symptoms spread through the group, and soon after returning to Los Angeles, Gregg tested positive. At the time, hospitals were unprepared for the virus, and he became the first COVID patient admitted to Providence St. Joseph Hospital in Burbank.Doctors told Gregg he had only a 1% chance of survival. After being placed into a medically induced coma and spending 31 days on a ventilator, he endured a cascade of life-threatening complications including sepsis, collapsed lungs, blood clots, and organ failure. Gregg flatlined multiple times and says doctors still cannot explain why he survived.When he finally woke up, the battle was far from over. Gregg had lost most of his fingers and several toes due to the life-saving treatments that kept blood flowing to his vital organs. He had to relearn how to walk, eat, and rebuild muscle after losing over 50 pounds during his hospitalization.Through the darkest moments, Gregg credits the strength of his “village”—friends, family, and his partner AJ—for giving him the motivation to fight through recovery. With the support of hundreds of loved ones rallying around him, Gregg set small, achievable goals that eventually led to an incredible milestone: getting back on skis the very same year he nearly died.Today, Gregg channels his second chance at life into purpose-driven work through Gregg’s Village and ChipIn, initiatives dedicated to supporting nonprofits and building community through giving.This powerful conversation explores resilience, mindset, gratitude, and the life-changing realization that the people around you can make all the difference when the unthinkable happens.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, clinical neuropsychologist Dr. Daniel Hai joins host Richard Taite for a powerful, unfiltered conversation on trauma, addiction, neuroplasticity, and what real healing actually requires.Dr. Hai, founder of the Neuro Assessment Center, breaks down neurocognitive therapy in practical terms—how he blends neuroscience, attachment theory, mindfulness, and real-world exposure therapy to create measurable cognitive and behavioral change. From meeting clients in classrooms and nightclubs to helping autistic adults integrate socially, he explains what exposure and response prevention (ERP) truly looks like outside the therapy office.They challenge controversial topics head-on: Is functional medicine overhyped? Are therapists neglecting their own unresolved trauma? What is “premorbid intelligence,” and can clinicians accurately measure someone’s capacity before addiction or trauma altered their trajectory? The discussion dives into executive functioning, obsessive thought loops, and the neurological patterns that keep people stuck.The episode turns personal when Richard shares his belief in transcendence—describing a moment in Italy where he had a glass of wine without reigniting addictive behavior, arguing that some individuals can move beyond constant internal struggle. Dr. Hai offers a clinical counterpoint, emphasizing maintenance, routine, and the reality that for many, recovery is an active, ongoing process. Together, they explore the gray space between “recovered” and “in recovery,” questioning whether the traditional disease model tells the full story.They also unpack neurodiversity, over-diagnosing, and whether society’s fixation on labels may hinder functional growth. Dr. Hai shares the powerful story of an 11-year-old nonverbal child who defied every clinical expectation—an experience that shaped his lifelong commitment to seeing beyond diagnoses and treating the whole person.The conversation expands into spirituality versus science, intuition, higher power, AI in mental health, ketamine and psychedelics, and why therapeutic alliance—not trendy modalities—remains the strongest predictor of long-term transformation.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, host Richard Taite sits down with Marci Hopkins, host of Wake Up With Marci and author of Chaos to Clarity. With 10 years of sobriety, Marci shares the defining moments that shaped her recovery journey—from childhood sexual abuse and generational alcoholism to the DUI that became her wake-up call on October 3, 2015.Marci opens up about coping with trauma through alcohol, confronting her stepfather years later, and mourning the mother she wished she had. She reflects on losing her mother to addiction, the complicated grief that followed, and the realization that recovery meant rebuilding her life from the ground up. “Once everything fell to the ground, I had to start rebuilding.”The conversation explores surrender in 12-step recovery, rewiring the brain through daily habits, and why recovery is not about willpower—but transformation. Marci explains how forgiveness, self-love, and spiritual connection became the foundation for lasting sobriety, and how motherhood ultimately fueled her decision to change. From “popping the tape” to avoid relapse to learning how to laugh sober, she shares practical tools for thriving after addiction.Richard and Marci also discuss breaking the stigma around substance use disorder, the dangers of fentanyl-laced street drugs, and the urgent need for parents to act when a child is using. They highlight resources like Shatterproof, founded by Gary Mendell after losing his son, and the importance of education, in-network treatment options, and family involvement in recovery.Marci shares insight from her new book, Wake Up, You’re Not Broken: What to Expect in the First 30 Days of Sobriety, offering guidance on cravings, triggers, shame, and the science behind early recovery. This episode is a powerful conversation about trauma, faith, forgiveness, parenting through addiction, and transcending chaos to build a beautiful, purpose-driven life.

On this episode of We’re Out Of Time, host Richard Taite sits down with rabbi, entrepreneur, and recovery coach Asher Gottesman for a raw, deeply human conversation about addiction, faith, accountability, and connection.Asher opens up about experiencing profound separation anxiety and loneliness at just five years old, growing up as the rabbi’s son, and feeling different from his peers. He shares how resentment toward faith and fear-based religion shaped his early relationship with God, eventually contributing to eating disorders, substance use, and a lifelong sense of unworthiness. Asher candidly recounts waiting two years to end his life so a life insurance policy would pay out, followed by the collapse of his multi-million-dollar business and filing for bankruptcy.From there, the episode explores his first real experience of unconditional love, sobriety, and community through recovery, including the moment he felt truly seen and accepted for the first time. Asher explains how keeping suicide “in his back pocket” paradoxically gave him the courage to rebuild, and how accountability, faith, and human connection became central to his healing.He reflects on Judaism as a framework for responsibility rather than fear, challenging performative spirituality and emphasizing kindness, humility, and lived amends. Asher also discusses the tension of being a “wounded healer,” balancing vulnerability with leadership, and offers compassionate advice for people in their 20s: you don’t need to do anything to be worthy of love.The conversation closes with insights on relapse, mentoring others, why social media is not real connection, and how true healing happens in community. Asher also shares how his work through Transcend Recovery and his podcast Showing Up With Asher G centers on helping people feel seen, heard, and unconditionally valued.