274 The Day My Nervous System Chose Violence (Internally)

The Day My Nervous System Chose Violence (Internally) Patricia Young (she/her) explores what happens when big feelings meet medication changes, OCD spirals, and unmet needs. Through a vulnerable personal story about adjusting OCD medication, asking for support, and reacting more intensely than expected, Patricia reflects on autism, relational OCD, RSD, and trauma responses. She also discusses how to hold grief and joy at the same time, how to create meaning when life is profoundly unfair, and why it's okay to share joy without making yourself smaller. This episode is a compassionate reminder that awareness, baseline tracking, and self-permission are key tools for sensitive and neurodivergent people navigating relationships, mental health, and change. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE · Big reactions aren't character flaws — they're often signals, especially for autistic and OCD brains · Medication changes can remove protective buffers, even when life circumstances are stable · Asking for what you want can activate PDA, RSD, and old relational wounds · OCD often pulls in "evidence" and tallying to justify emotional pain · Feeling justified doesn't mean the story is accurate — it means the feelings are loud · You can manage your behavior externally while still experiencing internal emotional chaos · Walking, movement, and problem-solving can help — but they don't erase vulnerability · A "hard day" doesn't mean failure — it means data · Knowing your emotional baseline is critical when adjusting meds · It's okay to decide that you don't want more days like that · You don't have to accept injustice to learn how to live alongside it · Two truths can exist at the same time: devastation and joy · Therapy and coaching work best when clients feel safe giving feedback · Neurodivergent-affirming practitioners change the entire therapeutic experience · You don't have to make yourself small to protect others from discomfort SOUND BITES   · "It wasn't about the coffee — it was about how big everything felt in my body." · "The bigger my feelings got, the more justification my brain wanted." · "This hasn't been my baseline — and that matters." · "I don't think this is something you ever 'accept,' but you can still create meaning." · "I don't want to live a life where I write people off when I'm overwhelmed."   SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. CHAPTERS (PLEASE ALLOW FOR ADDITION OF INTRO) 00:00 Navigating Big Feelings and Reactions 21:13 Creating Meaning Amidst Unfairness 34:21 Embracing Joy and New Experiences PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com LINKS   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

The Holidays: A Group Project My Nervous System Didn't Agree To In this New Year's episode, Patricia Young (she/her) explores why the holiday season can be especially challenging for autistic, ADHD, and AuDHD nervous systems. Through personal stories about gift giving, overstimulation, masking, PDA, rejection sensitivity, and the need for sameness and predictability, she unpacks how small changes and social expectations can quietly dysregulate neurodivergent people. The episode also includes updates on her purple hair and tattoo, reflections on attunement and fairness, and a gentle alternative to New Year's resolutions—offering practical categories for reflection that center self-compassion, regulation, and realistic support. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE · Why holidays are uniquely overstimulating for neurodivergent nervous systems · How transitions, visitors, and disrupted routines impact regulation · The role of predictability, sameness, and visual memory in autistic well-being · Why gift giving can activate PDA, executive dysfunction, and shame · How attunement in gift giving can feel deeply regulating—and deeply stressful · The pressure to perform gratitude and enthusiasm while masking discomfort · Why opening gifts in front of others can be overwhelming for autistic adults · How fairness, justice sensitivity, and reciprocity complicate holiday dynamics · The emotional labor involved in "doing it right" socially · How body doubling supports assertiveness and nervous system regulation · Why small environmental changes can create disproportionate stress · The difference between order as regulation versus control · How animals, sensory joy, and flexibility can increase tolerance for chaos · Reflections on regret, learning, and doing things differently over time · Why curiosity and problem-solving are often misunderstood in autistic communication · How rejection sensitivity and object permanence affect relationships · A compassionate alternative to New Year's resolutions · Reflective life categories including health, finances, relationships, self-care, creativity, home, and novelty · Why survival mode is sometimes the only valid goal · A reminder that sensitivity is wiring—not a flaw   SOUND BITES ·       "Our nervous systems really do best with sameness, repetition, and predictability." ·       "Masking is all about making other people feel comfortable—and that's a lot of work." ·       "Regret doesn't mean you did something wrong. It means you're learning." ·       "You have a right to be regulated, dysregulated, organized, disorganized, content, or discontent." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. CHAPTERS (PLEASE ALLOW FOR ADDITION OF INTRO) 00:00 Navigating Holiday Challenges 10:06 The Complexity of Gift Giving 20:39 Reflections on Relationships and Expectations 29:26 Looking Ahead: New Year Reflections PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com  LINKS  To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

Bold Moves: Purple Hair, a Tattoo, and No Take-Backs Patricia (she/her) reflects on what it really means to make bold moves—and how we talk to ourselves when those decisions don't land the way we hoped. Through the very real experiences of dyeing her hair purple for the first time and getting a tattoo she isn't sure she likes, she explores autistic decision-making, sensory overwhelm, masking, regret, and self-compassion. This episode is about reframing regret as information, honoring neurodivergent needs in the moment, and learning how to be kinder to ourselves when we take risks and feel unsure afterward. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE ·  End-of-year reflection: How has this year been, and what are we carrying into the next one? · The desire to make bold moves—and the fear that often comes with them · Deciding to dye hair purple for the first time · Letting excitement, doubt, and second-guessing coexist · Experiencing a deeply neurodivergent-affirming salon appointment · The importance of predictability, process explanations, and bodily autonomy · Getting over-hungry, tech issues, and how small barriers can cascade into overwhelm · Allowing a meltdown in a safe space instead of masking through it · Not knowing immediately whether you like something—and the pressure to perform enthusiasm · Scheduling a tattoo the very next day as another bold move · Sensory overload, unexpected pain, and difficulty advocating in the moment · Masking through physical pain and being praised for "doing great" · Immediate tattoo regret and the awareness of permanence · Naming regret without spiraling into shame or self-blame · Reframing regret as data, not a moral failure · Disconnecting from the body temporarily as a coping strategy · How rigid rules around food, ownership, and permission show up in autistic lives · The power of communicating needs instead of carrying silent embarrassment · Challenging the belief that we must always make the "right" decision · Ending with reminders about gentleness, lowered expectations, and honoring sensitivity SOUND BITES · "The goal was to make bold moves—and I did." · "It's okay to have regrets. That doesn't mean I did something wrong." · "I allowed myself to feel what I was feeling instead of masking and falling apart later." · "What we tell ourselves about our experiences matters more than the experience itself." · "Sensitivity is nothing to apologize for. It's how your brain is wired." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com  LINKS  To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

Keeping it Real During the Holidays: p.s. I Love the Grinch! Patricia (she/her) dives into the emotional and sensory whirlwind of navigating change as an AuDHDer during the holiday season. She unpacks the exhaustion that comes from shifting family dynamics, unpredictable routines, kitten chaos, people coming and going, and the desire to show up with more capacity than she actually has. Patricia speaks candidly about shutdowns, resentment, communication misfires and boundary-setting. This episode invites listeners to honor their own wiring, acknowledge their limits, and give themselves permission to navigate change on their own terms—especially when the world is loud, messy, and demanding far too much. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE ·   The emotional weight of constant change during the holidays ·  Why autistic and AuDHD nervous systems struggle with unpredictability ·  How people coming and going can destabilize daily rhythms ·  Sensory overwhelm from decorations, noise, and social expectations ·  The shutdown mode that follows too much "peopling" ·  Resentment that canform when needs aren't communicated directly ·  That awkward dance between wanting to show up and feeling over capacity ·  Kitten chaos as both joy and sensory overload ·  Feeling responsible for everyone's experience (hello, people-pleasing!) ·  The grief of not feeling safe to voice your values or boundaries ·  Family conflict and the ripple effects on your emotional regulation ·  Why inconsistency can be draining for some neurodivergent brains ·  The need for predictability, routines, and familiar sensory anchors ·  Internalized pressure to be "easygoing," especially around holidays ·  The truth-telling wisdom of the body when burnout hits ·  "Harvest feast" (aka Thanksgiving) recovery mode ·  Observing subtle family dynamics that others overlook ·  Using pacing and gentle self-compassion to navigate the season ·  How even positive changes can be dysregulating ·  The reminder that honoring your limits is an act of self-love SOUND BITES ·  "Change really affects me. I overdid it, and now my body is telling the truth." ·  "Even things that you enjoy can be dysregulating and overwhelming." ·  "If someone could respond differently, they would—we're not choosing to have difficulty with change." ·  "Inconsistency is very difficult for me; it's not about the tree, it's about the mismatch." ·  "I think what I call depression is really resentment for not being direct." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com LINKS  To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

Boring Means Stable: Learning to Love Ordinary Days In this honest, meandering, and heart-centered solo episode, Patricia Young (she/her) opens up about feeling "not enough," while navigating overwhelm, managing PDA (Pervasive Drive for Autonomy. From decluttering and kayaking to the quiet comfort of boring days and the challenges of social invitations, Patricia invites listeners into the gentle, nonlinear process of living authentically as an AuDHDer. With humor and tenderness, she explores aging, family connection, holidays, and what it means to find peace amid imperfection. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE · ·  Warm check-in and reflection on recording after a long pause. ·  Questioning whether to focus on educational autism content vs. personal lived experiences. ·  Feeling conflicted about being "self-centered" but recognizing that stories are teaching. ·  Update on absence of neighborhood drama and emotional regulation progress. ·  Learning to accept being perceived and misunderstood without spiraling into shame. ·  The liberating philosophy of the "We Do Not Care Club" — embracing authenticity and dropping people-pleasing. ·  Honest reflections on living in a chronic state of "not enoughness." ·  Managing overwhelm, task initiation struggles, and executive dysfunction. ·  The surprising victory of small tasks — like finally writing and depositing a check. ·  Adjusting OCD medication and rediscovering emotional depth and aliveness. ·  The tension between stability, boredom, and gratitude. ·  Recognizing that neurotypical spaces often feel flat or alienating, while "your people" bring out your voice. ·  The resistance around novelty and social invitations, even for enjoyable experiences. ·  The humor and vulnerability of sharing internal dialogue with accepting friends. ·  ADHD-fueled hobby cycles, clutter, and the emotional complexity of decluttering as an ND person. ·  Reflections on attachment to objects, trauma, and "don't touch my stuff" energy. ·  Navigating change, potential regret, and the push-pull between freedom and familiarity. ·  Anticipating the kids moving in—balancing excitement, companionship, and uncertainty. ·  Thoughts on the holidays, overstimulation, and why Thanksgiving feels grounding and joyful. ·  PDA flare-ups, avoidance of even beneficial demands, and compassion for executive fatigue. SOUND BITES ·  "I've really been in this era of not enough. Whatever I do just doesn't feel like enough." ·  "People are going to have their own thoughts and judgments about us — and we can't control that." ·  "I'm just trying to appreciate boring days, because boring means stable." ·  "Even when it's something that will help me, if it feels like a demand, my brain just says no." ·  "You are not for everybody, and everyone is not for you." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. TOPICS COVERED (please adjust for addition of introduction) 00:00 Navigating Personal Updates and Autism Awareness PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com LINKS  We Do Not Care Club IG-justbeingmelani www.wedonotcareclub.com To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

No Room for In-Between: Literal Thinking and Communication Ruptures In this raw and honest episode, Patricia (she/her) shares her ongoing challenges with neurodivergent miscommunication, community rupture, and the emotional toll of being misunderstood. From neighborhood conflicts to horse training lessons, from cancel culture to navigating friendships and travel as an autistic person, Patricia opens up about the messy, contradictory realities of life, belonging, and growth. Listeners will walk away feeling less alone in their struggles with relationships, self-advocacy, and embracing both discomfort and joy. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE · Why Patricia didn't want to record this episode—and why she did anyway · The ongoing story of neighborhood rupture and the painful dynamics of miscommunication · How neurodivergent communication differences play into misunderstanding and conflict · The discomfort of being misunderstood as an autistic person who values precision and exactness · The struggle of wanting repair but receiving ongoing hurtful communication instead · Recognizing when "these are not our people" and finding peace in letting go · Cancel culture: when it's useful, when it's harmful, and Patricia's lived perspective · How language change matters—and conversations with her husband about accountability in speech · The empowerment that comes from horse training and facing fear with big draft horses · Lessons from working with animals: calm presence, assertiveness, and learning new leadership skills · Navigating differences in friendships around money, dining, and travel · The autistic push-pull between craving sameness and being invited into novelty · Strategies for managing overwhelm when faced with too many choices or new experiences · How safe friendships allow for authenticity and unmasking · The sadness and privilege of having barriers to change, novelty, and travel—and finding supportive companions · Building resilience through small trial runs and intentional fun · The importance of bumping up against resistance to live a fuller, lighter life · Patricia's reflections on aging, matching tattoos with her kids, and wanting to add more joy SOUND BITES · There are times when we need to speak up, and there are times when we need to let people misunderstand us and sit with the discomfort." · "If you're autistic, precision and exactness are high values—being misunderstood can feel unbearable." · "This isn't personal. This is about neurodivergent miscommunication. And that gave me relief—at least for a little while." · "I'm more than two-thirds through my life, and I want to whip it up a little bit. If you're going to do some fun stuff, you better do it soon." · "Sensitivity is nothing to apologize for. You are perfect exactly as you are in a world not made for us." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. TOPICS COVERED (please adjust for addition of introduction) 00:00 Navigating Neurodivergent Communication Challenges 09:40 The Impact of Cancel Culture on Relationships 19:11 Finding Community and Connection 25:07 Embracing Change and Personal Growth PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com LINKS  To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

The Push-Pull of ADHD and Autism: Stretching Without Breaking In this candid conversation, Patricia Young (she/her) and B Lourenco (she/her) dive deep into the realities of living with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence. They explore the push-pull between self-accommodation and stretching ourselves, how shame and internalized ableism impact daily life, and what it means to create realistic support systems at home, in relationships, and in the workplace. Expect raw honesty, relatable stories, and practical insights for navigating neurodivergent life. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE · The ongoing "driver's seat battle" between ADHD and autism. · The push-pull between making accommodations and stretching ourselves beyond comfort. · Parenting a neurodivergent young adult while balancing when to push and when to allow rest. · Task initiation struggles — from making banana bread to cooking meals. · Body doubling as a powerful tool to reduce shame and spark motivation. · The "crisper/rotter" effect — guilt over wasted food and executive dysfunction. · Financial and practical impacts of task initiation challenges. · How privilege plays into having options like prepared or frozen meals when cooking feels impossible. · The cost of pushing through fatigue and flares with conditions like POTS and MCAS. · "Future me" thinking — and the difficulties neurodivergent folks have with impermanence. · Shame as the "ice cream scoop" on top of disability struggles. · Why diagnosis matters: language helps reduce shame and prevent repeating harmful patterns. · How powerlessness, and an attempt to gain autonomy can show up in small, reactive choices (like leaving a Facebook group). · Sensory sensitivities in family systems — how lack of accommodations can lead to dysfunction. · Practical accommodations for noise-sensitive parents and their kids. · Workplace challenges: 40-hour weeks, return-to-office pressures, and capitalism's rigidity. · Creative problem-solving in disabled and neurodivergent communities. · The deep fear of being uncared for and alone if we can't keep up. · Hyper-independence and isolation in the ADHD/autistic community. · Internalized ableism and the "shoulds" that drive shame and burnout. · Neurodivergence as a dynamic disability — what's possible one day isn't always possible the next. · Radical acceptance as a path toward reducing judgment and finding relief. SOUND BITES · "It begs the question of, okay, is that okay? Can we just say that's how it is?" – B Lourenco · "Instead of putting our energy into addressing the gap, folks will take the great divide and then put a scoop of shame on top of it." – B Lourenco · "All the terrible things that we tell ourselves… if I didn't have that awareness, I'd just keep repeating these patterns." – Patricia Young · "In order to truly accommodate ourselves, we have to acknowledge that it's as hard as it is and that we're as disabled as we are." – B Lourenco · "Sometimes I have to ask myself, what if what you're going through is exactly where you need to be?" – Patricia Young SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. TOPICS COVERED (please adjust for addition of introduction) 00:00 Navigating Neurodivergence: A Personal Journey 02:59 Understanding Accommodations: Balancing Needs and Expectations 05:48 The Push-Pull of Task Initiation and Self-Care 08:33 Shame and Support: The Role of Community 11:35 The Impact of Environment on Neurodivergent Individuals 14:26 Workplace Challenges: The Struggle for Accommodations 17:16 Building Bridges: Community and Creative Solutions 20:00 Radical Acceptance: Embracing Our Reality 22:48 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Identity 25:42 The Dynamic Nature of Neurodivergence 29:02 Finding Joy in the Present Moment 31:47 The Bigger Picture: Building a Better Future 34:47 Conclusion: Resources and Future Endeavors PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com PODCAST GUEST B Lourenco, MA, LMHC (she/her) is a licensed mental health counselor, educator, advocate, and activist. B has been working in community support for nearly 20 years and is committed to social change on all system levels. Seeing mental health advocacy as a way to serve the community, she earned a Master of Arts degree in Clinical Psychology, with a Systems Emphasis, in 2015 and began her private practice, B Lourenco Therapy in 2017.    B has also worked in the public school system, providing support to students with behavioral issues that made attending school challenging for them. Highly trained in Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), B became a district-wide expert in supporting neurodivergent students. It was during this work that she began to be critical of the medical models of support for neurodivergence, including ABA. Making the shift from the medical to the Neurodiversity-affirming model has allowed her to finally identify her own neurodivergence, including Autism and ADHD.    Combining her lived experience of neurodivergence, along with years of anti-oppression work, B is passionate about helping others untangle themselves from harmful practices and align themselves with those that instead support marginalized communities. In addition to CE events for healthcare providers, she has also been a speaker on panels and podcasts, and also facilitates community based workshops. https://www.blourencotherapy.com   LINKS  Cascadia Training: https://cascadia-training.com  Imani Barbarin—crutches_and_spice IG https://www.instagram.com/crutches_and_spice/  To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

Rupture without Repair, and the Discomfort of Being Misunderstood   In this deeply personal episode, Patricia (she/her) unpacks the fallout from a neighborhood rupture and the painful loss of community connection. Through the lens of being autistic and AuDHD, she explores rejection sensitivity, communication breakdowns, friendship trauma, and why repair isn't always possible. She also shares how co-regulation, body doubling, Costco runs, and fierce family love provide grounding. This conversation is raw, tender, and validating for anyone who has struggled with being misunderstood as a neurodivergent person. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE ·       The neighborhood rupture and how a joke led to exclusion from a community group ·       What happens when rupture and repair aren't possible in friendships ·       The autistic need for clarity, communication, and closure ·       Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) and how silence feels like rejection ·       The PDA (persistent drive for autonomy) response to being left out ·       The pain of friendship trauma and feeling misunderstood ·       How autistic people process and loop on unresolved conflict ·       The role of community in belonging and nervous system regulation ·       Why body doubling and co-regulation help autistic/ADHD brains stay grounded ·       Finding comfort in Costco runs, small joys, and simple routines ·       Permission to need rest, wear earplugs, or retreat from sensory overwhelm ·       Generational differences in friendship and communication between neurodivergent people ·       Practicing adaptability through change (like moving workspaces at home) ·       The bittersweet truth: not all friendships are meant to last ·       Gratitude reframed through an autistic lens—how to find appreciation without bypassing pain SOUND BITES "For us, it felt like there was no space for human mistakes, no place for rupture and repair." "This activated friendship trauma in me, and I've noticed my protective armor is up." "Intellectually, I know this is fine. Emotionally, feeling misunderstood and powerless is really hard." "You have a right to speak up." "Not all friendships last forever." "Life is messy. Friendships are messy." "Body doubling is such a beautiful way to borrow someone else's nervous system to regulate." "Sensitivity is nothing to apologize for. It's how you're wired. You have the right to take up space." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are.   TOPICS COVERED (please adjust for addition of introduction) 00:00 Navigating Community Dynamics 08:42 The Impact of Silence and Rejection 17:06 Rupture, Repair, and the Complexity of Relationships 23:52 Finding Joy in Everyday Moments 29:13 Gratitude and Perspective on Life PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com LINKS    To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

When ADHD Wants Adventure and Autism Just Wants a Nap Patricia (she/her) explores what it means to show up authentically as a neurodivergent person—especially when navigating the tension between wanting novelty (hello ADHD/AuDHD brains!) and craving sameness (thank you autism). She shares candid stories about celebrating her anniversary, managing low energy, social interactions, and dealing with conflict. Patricia also opens up about balancing autistic traits, ADHD novelty-seeking, PDA (persistent drive for autonomy), and honoring her sensitivity. If you're autistic, ADHD, AuDHD, or otherwise neurodivergent, this episode offers relatable honesty, self-compassion, and a reminder that sensitivity is nothing to apologize for. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE ·      Why showing up authentically—even when low energy or struggling—creates safety and deeper connection. ·      The push-pull between ADHD's love of novelty and autism's need for sameness. ·      A vulnerable look at performance pressure, PDA (persistent drive for autonomy), and the tension of "supposed to" versus authentic presence. ·      Reflections on navigating conflict, rejection, and the looping thoughts that come with OCD and sensitivity. ·      Stories of how small moments of authenticity (complimenting a server, connecting with strangers, sharing vulnerability) can bring ease and humor. ·      The joys of volunteering with puppies, finding novelty in animals, and noticing the small things that bring comfort. ·      Honest sharing about energy struggles, self-judgment, and learning to honor your body's signals. KEY TAKEAWAYS ·       You don't have to perform or mask to be worthy of connection. ·       Novelty and sameness can co-exist—it's about experimenting and noticing what feels supportive. ·       Authenticity often comes in small, ordinary moments that bring relief and connection. ·       Conflict and rejection are painful, but self-trust and curiosity can soften the edges. ·       Sensitivity is not something to apologize for—it's a way of being in the world. SOUND BITES "Show up as you are." "I felt very inadequate." "I really resist it." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are. TOPICS COVERED (please adjust for addition of introduction) 00:00 Embracing Authenticity 09:12 Navigating Social Expectations 17:54 Finding Balance in Emotions PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com LINKS   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com  

When the Dogs Stop Saying Hi: The Human Need for Connection and Belonging Patricia (she/her) explores the complexities of community, being perceived, and the challenges of navigating relationships amidst misunderstandings and cancel culture. She shares personal experiences of rupture and repair within her community, reflecting on the emotional impact of feeling excluded and the importance of acknowledging one's behavior in relationships. Patricia also highlights the simultaneous beauty of connections and celebrations, even amidst challenges, emphasizing the need for self-acceptance and understanding in the face of adversity. KEY TAKEAWAYS ·       The emotional toll of being perceived in a way that doesn't match how we see ourselves ·       Owning mistakes and navigating the possibility of repair (even when others might not be open) ·       The pain of being excluded from community events and how rejection sensitivity & OCD can flare ·       Mixed emotions around her birthday — feeling both unseen by some and deeply loved by others ·       The balance between taking accountability and resisting self-abandonment ·       Practices of self-compassion when reassurance doesn't come from others ·       What happens when justice, fragility, and nuance collide in relationships ·       Her growing love of animals, volunteering with horses, and a longing to return to simple joys ·       A behind-the-scenes peek into the Unapologetically AuDHD podcast launch ·       The challenges of time agnosia in friendships and how ND folks can navigate it compassionately ·       Updates on kayaking, paddleboarding, and listening to her nervous system ·       A gentle invitation to ask yourself: Would I want to be in community with people who won't repair? HIGHLIGHTS   ·       The challenge of being perceived differently than how we see ourselves. ·       Rupture and repair are essential components of relationships. ·       Community can provide both support and feelings of exclusion. ·       Setting boundaries is a right everyone has. ·       Cancel culture can complicate personal relationships. ·       Acknowledging one's behavior is crucial for repair. ·       It's important to celebrate connections amidst challenges. ·       Sensitivity is a unique trait that should be embraced. ·       Self-acceptance is key to navigating emotional turmoil. ·       Finding joy in small moments can help during difficult times.      SOUND BITES "Rupture and repair is part of being human. And sometimes repair doesn't happen — but that doesn't mean we stop showing up with integrity." "My OCD wants reassurance. And sometimes, I just have to sit with that and give it to myself." "We all have a primal need for belonging. And when that's taken away, it's a wound that goes deep." "I want to spend time with animals." "It's okay to not be social." "It's okay to feel connected." SENSITIVITY IS NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR; IT'S HOW YOUR BRAIN IS WIRED You are not broken. You were shaped by systems that weren't built for you. You deserve rest, joy, and support exactly as you are.  TOPICS COVERED (please adjust for addition of introduction)  00:00 Navigating Community and Perception 11:44 Rupture and Repair in Relationships 19:20 Celebrating Connections Amidst Challenges 25:44 Embracing Sensitivity and Self-Acceptance PODCAST HOST Patricia Young (she/her) was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it's like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller.  Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile, OCD and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion.  She created the podcasts Unapologetically Sensitive and Unapologetically AuDHD to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren't alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges.  Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you Patricia's website, podcast episodes and more: www.unapologeticallysensitive.com LINKS   To write a review in itunes: click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2 select "listen on Apple Podcasts" chose "open in itunes" choose "ratings and reviews" click to rate the number of starts click "write a review" Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/ Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/ Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/ Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv Unapologetically AuDHD Podcast-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/unapologeticallyaudhd/ e-mail-- [email protected] Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com