The Packet

For entertainment purposes only. This is not to be used in place of a licensed therapist or other qualified medical aid given its satirical and comedic content. Gonsanto Industries welcomes you to the first in a series of guided meditations that will ease your mind, calm your body, and allow you to transition into a fully sleepless existence.   Written, directed, and narrated by Adam Blanford.  Sound effects provided by freesound.org Theme music provided by The Superluminal Project Transcript by Alexandra Douros Transcript available at https://drive.google.com/file/d/19AGiBDvMQ_JOV_-JhWtgu-2DxPtr6UTg/view?usp=sharing Content warnings: 1:30 to 1:35: mention of sedatives.3:20 to 3:39, 5:38  to 9:02: Anxious situations. 6:30 to 6:44: Threat of death.5:49 to 5:51, 6:02 to 6:05, 7:01 to 7:04, 7:44 to 7:54: loud noises. 6:14 to 6:26: mention of medical procedures.7:21 to 7:24: mention of weapons. 7:34 to 7:50: descriptions of monster. 7:50 to 8:42: death, eating.

Content warnings: At 4:09 to 4:30: Discussions of weight loss and dieting; at 6:38 to 6:53, physical violence; at 8:02 to 8:45: anxiety and involuntary sedation; at 9:38 to 10:24: Paranoia; at 11:06 to 11:59: Depiction of a hostile situation and threat of violence; at 12:00 to 13:07: Paranoia; startling noise at 13:20 to 13:21. Transcript available at https://www.throtopro.com/the-insomnia-project   Things begin to unravel for the test subjects.  Eliza still struggles containing her anger, Martin really needs some sleep, and Jessica is certain someone at Gonsanto is out to get her.   Cast List: Eliza - Jaqui KerschenbaumLea - Angela TranMark - Richard DresdenDr. Baker - Lindsay ZanaHelen - Tara SantoraMartin - Elijah GabrielJenn - Charlotte NorupJessica - Allison BrandtHotel Worker - Nikko Goldstein

Santa and his elves could use a little boost leading up to Christmas, and decide to enroll in The Insomnia Project.  A few of them start experiencing odd side effects, and the Gonsanto team is called in to the North Pole to sort out the mess. Warning: This episode contains chewing/mouth sounds and some violence Transcript: https://drive.google.com/open?id=1dWPzfqce9RIDaVqspJ9wzWPSdza6aGkj Credits:  This episode’s writing, sound design, and production by Adam Blanford.   Sound effects provided by freesound.org (specifics listed at the end).  Theme music provided by the Superluminal Project.   Adam Blanford played Grandpa Sparkle and the loveable Gonsanta Clause.  Dr. Baker was played by Lindsay Zana.  Sam was Graham Rowat.  Helen was Tara Santora.  Dr. Montgomery was Dave Morgan.  Sparkle was Kaitlyn Kliman.  Twinkle was Melissa Medina.  Santa was Kyle Gould.  Gumdrop was Mark Harrietha.  Security Elf 1 was Vincent King.Security Elf 2 was Shaina Wareing.  Computer voice was S.H. Cooper.  The announcer on our radio ad was Nick Bean and the tired actor was Kyle Gould.    Sound Effects: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kT1UpF0mqVzVL1ga4rA4Jf-fdfOW7qRCLs50ezE56pM/edit?usp=sharing

Warning: This episode contains violence and a very creepy man on a train. Transcript available at https://www.throtopro.com/the-insomnia-project   Sam has some very important data to share at lab meeting.  We should all probably pay attention to it, bla bla bla.  Also, burritos! Cast List: Eliza - Jaqui Kerschenbaum Loud Commuter - SH Cooper Creeper - Adam Blanford Helen - Tara Santora Dr. Montgomery - Dave Morgan Sam - Graham Rowat Dr. Baker - Lindsay Zana Martin - Elijah Gabriel Jessica - Allison Brandt Jenn - Charlotte Norup Sound effects:   Door Slam - TiesWijnen https://freesound.org/people/TiesWijnen/sounds/455540/ Wall Bump 1.wave - Osirus Waltz https://freesound.org/people/Osiruswaltz/sounds/457741/ 7_impact_falling_chair.wav -  14F_NetusilovaKristyna https://freesound.org/people/14F_NetusilovaKristyna/sounds/419568/ Footsteps.wave - Sangtao https://freesound.org/people/sangtao/sounds/189335/ Thump_004.wav - Brokenphono https://freesound.org/people/Brokenphono/sounds/344151/ Breaking Glass #2.wave - Agaxly https://freesound.org/people/Agaxly/sounds/233606/ glass2.wav - drewkelly  https://freesound.org/people/drewkelly/sounds/172000/ Knock on the door - HunteR4708 https://freesound.org/people/HunteR4708/sounds/256513/ Indoor adult murmur, small group.wav - SliceSound https://freesound.org/people/SpliceSound/sounds/260121/ Sitting Office Chair.WAV - dansayshi https://freesound.org/people/dansayshi/sounds/416319/ rubbershoes.m4a - crowcube2 https://freesound.org/people/crowcube2/sounds/405289/ walking around the room - launemax  https://freesound.org/people/launemax/sounds/250022/ Footsteps Dress Shoes Wood Floor - allrealsound https://freesound.org/people/allrealsound/sounds/161756/ steps in high heels.wav - anagar https://freesound.org/people/anagar/sounds/267933/ High Heels.m4a - Daniela-Santos https://freesound.org/people/Daniela-Santos/sounds/424600/ alarm4.WAV - Hoerspielwerkstatt_HEF https://freesound.org/people/Hoerspielwerkstatt_HEF/sounds/270639/ dialing 3.aiff - bejaminharvey https://freesound.org/people/benjaminharveydesign/sounds/315919/ phont_pick_up.wav - nakenne https://freesound.org/people/nakenne/sounds/467896/ Keyboard Fast - Lioo159 https://freesound.org/people/Lioo159/sounds/333579/ getting out of chair-walking-sitting back down.wav - CommStud95 https://freesound.org/people/CommStud95/sounds/411714/ Knock_the_door.wav - anagar https://freesound.org/people/anagar/sounds/267931/ Door Open Close - amholma https://freesound.org/people/amholma/sounds/344360/ Itemp Drop_Plastic 001.wav - mjvilches https://freesound.org/people/mjvilches/sounds/361661/ Gasp 5 with shock.wav - jayfrosting https://freesound...

The test subjects have their first check in to test their progress.   Warning - mouth sounds and chewing from 12:05-12:40. Transcript available at https://www.throtopro.com/the-insomnia-project   Cast List: Martin - Elijah Gabriel Susan - Kaitlyn Kliman Eliza - Jaqui Kerschenbaum Sam - Graham Rowat Jessica - Allison Brandt Dr. Baker - Lindsay Zana Dr. Montgomery - Dave Morgan Manager - Kirsty Woolven Officer - Adam Blanford   Sound effects: Bottle Smaby by Roxis_Boy - https://freesound.org/people/Roxis_Boy/sounds/401619/   20131202_chair falling on the ground_ZoomH4nXY.wav by Soundscape_Leuphana -  https://freesound.org/people/Soundscape_Leuphana/sounds/210443/   Glass breaking by leandrocordeiro - https://freesound.org/people/Soundscape_Leuphana/sounds/210443/   Printer1 by ptrflr - https://freesound.org/people/ptrflr/sounds/394492/   phone ringing.mp3 by Rebecca_f - https://freesound.org/people/Rebecca_f/sounds/425660/   Office with Typing.wav by Walter_Odington - https://freesound.org/people/Walter_Odington/sounds/32380/   Door close.ave by soundmary - https://freesound.org/people/soundmary/sounds/117614/   Knock on the door by HunteR4708 - https://freesound.org/people/HunteR4708/sounds/256513/   Knock_the_door.wave by anagar - https://freesound.org/people/anagar/sounds/267931/   Slam door.MP3 by SoundsForHim -  https://freesound.org/people/SoundsForHim/sounds/395653/   click.wav by soundsofawesome - https://freesound.org/people/soundsofawesome/sounds/349330/   Bar Crowd in Belgrade by EpicWizard - https://freesound.org/people/EpicWizard/sounds/394290/   CrowdPanic.mp3 by bethazarus - https://freesound.org/people/belthazarus/sounds/435716/   gasp.mp3 by Topschool - https://freesound.org/people/Topschool/sounds/360469/   Gasp! by ZerOcarina - https://freesound.org/people/ZerOcarina/sounds/232263/   Male Gasp 1.wave by jawbutch - https://freesound.org/people/jawbutch/sounds/344407/   Burp! by Breviceps - https://freesound.org/people/Breviceps/sounds/444496/   Placing plate on the tray by MilanKovanda - https://freesound.org/people/MilanKovanda/sounds/377050/   plate.wav by Closetwalrus - https://freesound.org/people/Closetwalrus/sounds/370298/   Cubiertos.wav by nmarciniegasm - https://freesound.org/people/nmarciniegasm/sounds/237306/   Silverware_rubbing_on_plate by tmkappelt - https://freesound.org/people/tmkappelt/sounds/85705/   Guts Dragging by altfuture - https://freesound.org/people/altfuture/sounds/174634/  

Are you tired of your exhausting coffee shop job, trying to please customers that never know what they want?  Are you about to go on an old lady murdering spree?  Sign up for the Insomnia Project today! Transcript available at https://www.throtopro.com/the-insomnia-project Cast list: Martin - Elijah Gabriel Fran - Charlotte Norup Stardust - Valorie Hall Sarah - Karin Heimdall   Sound Effects: Car door - by cj_ascoli Cardoor opening by supersnd Door, front, opening, by giddster Leaving Walk by trip2000 Paper Bag and Bottle Handling FF387 by martinimeniscus 1. putting beans in the coffee gringer by dsmolenaers Walking with sandals by kyrika84 Footsteps on Wood by mydo1 Door - open 01 by Anthousai Office/Store Door Bell Jingle (on a string) by EpicWizard Dollar Bill Rustles by kayasavas87 Coffeegrinder by ipears1 grinding beans by ToddBradley Cash register by monotraum Coffee Shop Chatter by bvsowlr Paper rustling by Adam Blanford

Need more money for "school supplies?"  Has that meanie parent of yours cut you out of using the credit card?  Consider signing up to participate in the Insomnia Project! End music by The Superluminal Project Transcript available at https://www.throtopro.com/the-insomnia-project Cast List: Jessica - Allison Brandt Cashier - Haley C. McCarthy Tow truck driver - Mark Harrietha Sound effects by: 1) Car Horn 1.wav by 3863 https://freesound.org/people/3863/sounds/235363/ 2) Passing Car (wet road) by Breviceps https://freesound.org/people/Breviceps/sounds/462862/ 3) At a Bus Stop by Woodylein https://freesound.org/people/Woodylein/sounds/213564/ 4) VW Golf GTI Drive (Zoom H2N m&s).wav by EverdaySounds https://freesound.org/people/EverydaySounds/sounds/268626/ 5) Scribble by Tomoyo Ichijouji https://freesound.org/people/Tomoyo%20Ichijouji/sounds/211247/ 6) truck pickup door open close real nice slam.flac by kyles https://freesound.org/people/kyles/sounds/450225/ 7) dial tone_us.mp3 by Felfa https://freesound.org/people/Felfa/sounds/188694/ 8) Street Noise.wav by BeatsbyCasper https://freesound.org/people/BeatsbyCasper/sounds/170246/ 9) Crowd Noise 3.wav by iamazerrad https://freesound.org/people/iamazerrad/sounds/274347/ 10) 7’11 Sliding Door by plasterbrain https://freesound.org/people/plasterbrain/sounds/399092/ 11) Shirt Clothing Movement by leonelmail https://freesound.org/people/leonelmail/sounds/429080/ 12) Clothes Movements Foley by leonelmail https://freesound.org/people/leonelmail/sounds/320876/ 13) Leather Jacket Wooshes by jtnewlin13 https://freesound.org/people/jtnewlin13/sounds/349863/ 14) Subway station, card swipe by SpliceSound https://freesound.org/people/SpliceSound/sounds/369853/ 15) Beep 05 Negative by PaulMorek https://freesound.org/people/PaulMorek/sounds/330053/ 16) purserustle.wav by nickrave https://freesound.org/people/nickrave/sounds/178068/ 17) High Heels.m4a by Daniela-Santos https://freesound.org/people/Daniela-Santos/sounds/424600/ 18) bag_open.wav by spidervis https://freesound.org/people/spidervis/sounds/406130/ 19) Market scanner beep by nooly https://freesound.org/people/nooly/sounds/331358/ 20) US Department store – checkouts by icmusic https://freesound.org/people/icmusic/sounds/268941/ 21) Construction Dumpster Delivery by rodincoil

Working a dead end job with the most obnoxious boss ever?  Dating life not quite where you would like? Consider signing up for the Insomnia Project! We know all you're doing is playing Overwatch anyway...  "Bill" is part of a minisode series that answers the question - why in the world would you sign up for the Insomnia Project? Transcript available at https://www.throtopro.com/the-insomnia-project Cast list: Bill - John Patneaude Matt - Jacob Wilson Sandy - Kirsty Woolven Amy - SH Cooper Sharon - Kaitlyn Kliman Ethel - Charlotte Norup Aubrey - Aubrey Lebeau Sound effects credits: Fast short typing by CapsLok - submitted March 19, 2013 https://freesound.org/people/CapsLok/sounds/181264/ Cubiertos.wav (silverware) by - submitted May 10, 2014 nmarciniegasm https://freesound.org/people/nmarciniegasm/sounds/237306/ CoffeeShopChatter by oliverbrotzman - Submitted July 26, 2011 https://freesound.org/people/oliverbrotzman/sounds/125247/ Dishes by Katfolker - Submitted April 28, 2018 https://freesound.org/people/katfolker/sounds/426875/ knife-scrapes.wav by spawklz - submitted October 3, 2012 https://freesound.org/people/spawklz/sounds/166338/ Frying Pan Sizzle by BenjaminNelan - Submitted August 31, 2016 https://freesound.org/people/spawklz/sounds/166338/ Mouse Clicks by Aiden Ford Chair pulled out and creaking by Aiden Ford Footsteps by Aiden Ford

Test subjects Eliza, Jason, Jessica, and Martin come into Gonsanto Industries for baseline testing and "the treatment".  Music in this episode: Credits theme by Superluminal Project "Playful Planet" by Secession Studios" "Abgrund" by SatanasiA "Eyes Like a Nova" by Carl Phaser "Black Sail" by Chastity Belt  

The Insomnia Project is recruiting test subjects!   Transcript available at https://www.throtopro.com/the-insomnia-project   Announcer - Nick Bean Tired Actor - Kyle Gould