The Hardcore Therapist 78.5- Overcoming Self-Abandonment

On this episode of The Hardcore Therapist, today we're diving into a powerful topic: self-abandonment. This is something so many of us struggle with without even realizing it—saying yes when we mean no, ignoring our own needs, or constantly putting others before ourselves. But what does it really mean to abandon yourself, and more importantly, how can we stop doing it? 

On this episode of The Hardcore Therapist, I am thrilled to welcome Ray Harkins. Ray is the host of the influential podcast 100 Words or Less, where he dives deep into the stories of musicians, artists, and creatives. Beyond the podcasting world, Ray is also the lead singer for the melodic hardcore band Taken. We'll explore his journey through music, the evolution of the hardcore scene, and the intersection of mental health and creativity. Check out Ray's new band Bloodguilt!@xpurposex@100wordspodcast@takenband@bloodguilt_hc

First, I just want to acknowledge how incredibly painful and confusing this must feel. To be in a marriage where one person has emotionally stepped away, while you’re still physically sharing a home and parenting together, is a deeply complicated experience. It makes sense that you’re struggling with what to do next.

I'm beyond excited to welcome a fellow Detroiter and friend of the show, Monica Sklar, Ph.D.! Monica is an associate professor and director of the Historic Clothing and Textiles Collection at the University of Georgia, where she dives deep into the intersections of fashion, subculture, and technology in archival practice. She’s also the vice president of education for the Costume Society of America and a go-to expert for major outlets like The Guardian, New York Post, and Washington Post. You may have even heard her insightful commentary on hit podcasts like 99% Invisible and Dressed.

Mornings can feel hard—scrambling to get out the door, rushing through tasks, and starting the day already overwhelmed. That chaotic energy doesn’t just disappear; it lingers, affecting mood, focus, and stress levels. But what if small, intentional changes to your morning routine could set a completely different tone for the day? On the podcast, we’ll explore science-backed strategies to improve your routine in ways that boost mood, reduce anxiety, and increase productivity—so you can start your day feeling more in control and less like you’re playing catch-up.

I'm beyond excited about this episode with  Kulpa and Vasudeva from SOMA—Sacred Order of Mystic Apogees. This New Jersey-based ecstatic kirtan band brings a powerful fusion of their hardcore and metal roots into the world of devotional music. Blending traditional Indian kirtan with amplified instruments, folk influences, and raw energy, SOMA creates a sound that's as transcendent as it is intense. I can't wait to dive into their journey and explore how their music bridges the sacred and the hardcore. @soma_kirtanhttps://open.spotify.com/artist/4O5YtIxvnil55Ql8O5m0SJhttps://tylerchildersmusic.com/pages/tour-dates?srsltid=AfmBOoonyAKvWGiMxWNNPAmChAKnQzKCG0vFi5vrcSticsjxNGGWlFWj

On this episode of The Hardcore Therapist, we’re diving into something a lot of people don’t talk about: when self-help actually does more harm than good."\We live in a world that tells us we should always be improving, leveling up, and becoming our ‘best selves.’ But what happens when the pursuit of growth turns into a never-ending cycle of self-criticism, anxiety, and burnout? Are we really improving, or are we just running from ourselves? That’s what we’re unpacking today.If you’ve ever felt like no matter how much personal development you do, it’s never enough.

On this episode of The Hardcore Therapist,  I am stoked to be  joined by Walter Schreifels, one of the most celebrated musicians, producers and songwriters in hardcore & punk. Walter is known for his time in legendary bands like Youth of Today, Gorilla Biscuits, and Quicksand, Rival Schools, Vanishing Life, and Dead Heavens. 

We hear these words all the time—narcissist, gaslighting, triggered—but are we really using them correctly? Ever heard someone say, 'My ex was a total narcissist,' but deep down, you wonder… were they really? Or is it just the go-to breakup insult now? In this episode, we’re breaking down the true meaning of these words, how they get misused, and why pop culture might be making it worse.

J. Curtis Strickland. He’s a SAG-AFTRA actor bringing stories to life on screen, the host of The T&F Podcast where conversations get real, the mastermind behind Hellsheart Merch Co, and the bass player with the band Lockdown.IG: @thetandfpodcast @tenthcanto @hellsheatco