EP09: How to Listen to Your Desire and Create the Life You Want

Before bidding you adieu until season 2, I have a surprise for you ;)Today, we're welcoming friend-of-the-podcast Ruan Willow to share a steamy excerpt from her Decadent Erotica Anthology.Audio erotica is a powerful form of fantasy fuel. If you’ve never tried it before, I invite you to get curious about whether audio erotica might provide you with a new pathway to pleasure.And, if you start listening and it’s not your cup of tea? That’s ok, too!Ruan Willow is an erotic author and creator of the Oh F*ck Yeah! podcast, where she seamlessley blends readings of her erotic writing with interviews with sexuality and pleasure experts.If you enjoy this excerpt, you can listen to many more for free on the Oh Fuck Yeah podcast, available wherever fine podcasts are found! Learn more about Ruan and follow her here: https://linktr.ee/RuanWillowListen to Oh F*ck Yeah: https://ohfckyeahwithruanwillow.buzzsprout.com/Buy the Decadent Erotica AnthologyOn this bonus mini-season of the Slutty Activism podcast, we’ve explored the theme of Uncommon Pleasure. We’ve also been going deeper into opening up new pathways to pleasure in the 5 Day Pleasure Diary Challenge. You can join this challenge at any time in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community Facebook group and clicking on the Guides section. Join today by going to sluttyactivism.group.

Have you ever noticed how hard it is to slow down? Have you ever struggled to rest, or felt like down time was something you needed to earn and that you only deserved after hard work? Living under capitalism, society discourages rest and valorizes productivity.But what if slowing the fuck down is just the thing you need to unlock entirely new experiences of pleasure?Today, we're joined by Lucy Rowett on this special bonus episode of Slutty Activism to talk about the uncommon pleasure you can experience when you slow down.Lucy Rowett is a certified sexologist and sex coach who helps women and people with vulvas let go of sexual shame and create passionate, pleasurable relationships. We covered A LOT together, from what slowing down means, why it can be so hard to do, how powerful slowing down is for neurodivergence, highly sensitive people, and people with chronic health conditions, why you have to do your due diligence in the world of spiritual sexuality, and how you can get started. Lucy also generously leads us through a guided meditation you can listen to again and again as you cultivate mindfulness and rest as pathways to greater pleasure.In this episode you will learn:1) How slowing down can help reduce stress and promote pleasure2) How activation (sympathetic nervous system response) can be positive or negative3) A guided meditation you can use to tap into presence and pleasure in your bodyWant More Uncommon Pleasure?Join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group for the 5 Day Pleasure Diary Challenge. Get involved by going to SluttyActivism.groupAbout Today's Guest:Lucy Rowett, CSC CS ACS, is a certified sexologist and sex coach who is passionate about helping women and people with vulvas let go of sexual shame and hangups and embrace pleasure to create the passionate relationships they've always desired. She uses a combination of mind body tools with evidence-based sexuality education to create a fun and open space for womxn to explore their full erotic potential.Her speciality is working with women and people with vulvas who come from Faith backgrounds who are struggling to let go of sexual shame and enjoy pleasurable and intimate relationships again.She is a resident on UK contraception platform, The Lowdown, and she is regularly quoted in the media for her expertise in sexual health and wellness, pleasure, and sexual shame- including&nbsp; Men's Health, GQ, Kinkly, The O Diaries, The Sun, Insider, and Glamour.Here's where you can learn more about Lucy online:Website: https://lucyrowett.com/Free video class on authentic sexual confidence: https://bit.ly/moreconfidentinbedFree audio course on empowered sexual communication: https://bit.ly/MoreofWhatYouWantInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/lucylurowettTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@lucyrowettFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/lucyrowettcscLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucy-rowett-csc-cs-acs-9a301351/Connect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to<a...

A lot of the discourse in the world around porn is binary. Either someone is anti-porn or pro-porn. What gets lost in the shuffle is that a lot of people still choose to engage with porn. What might a pro-choice approach to porn look like, and how can we critically evaluate our relationship with porn in service of pleasure?Today, we're joined by Cam Fraser on this special bonus episode of Slutty Activism to talk about the uncommon pleasure you can experience while using porn consciously, if you choose to do so.Cam is is a Certified Professional Sex Coach and Certified Sexologist who brings together the academic and the esoteric into powerful coaching and support for men.Together, we drilled into the two conversations we need to have as consumers of porn, looking at porn as a tool to amplify arousal and explore sexual fantasies, and ways to bring embodiment and fully-body pleasure to experiences of porn. There is so much richness here, and Cam offers so many practical tips, you’ll be set for a while when it comes to new ways to experiment.In this episode you will learn:1) How the way we use porn affects our relationship to porn and to our own pleasure2) The ethical implications of different types of pornography and how to make conscious choices3) How to bring our whole bodies into our experiences with porn, if we choose to use pornWant More Uncommon Pleasure?Join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group for the 5 Day Pleasure Diary Challenge. Get involved by going to SluttyActivism.groupAbout Today's Guest:Cam is a Certified Professional Sex Coach and Certified Sexologist. His work integrates scientifically validated, medically accurate information about sexual health, with sacred sexuality teachings from the mystery traditions. As a coach, he helps men go beyond surface-level sex and into full-bodied, self-expressed, pleasure-oriented sexual experiences free of anxiety or shame.Here's where you can learn more about Cam online:Instagram: www.instagram.com/thecamfraserTikTok: www.tiktok.com/@thecamfraser2.0&nbsp;YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKn_mdnURk5OeFf9vUAtClQConnect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production

In the wake of increasing legalization of recreational cannabis, have you been at least a little bit curious about how cannabis could be used as a pathway to new pleasure experiences?Today, we're joined by Dr. Norelyn Parker on this special bonus episode of Slutty Activism to talk about the uncommon pleasure opened up by working with your endocannabinoid system.Dr. Norelyn Parker is a Cannabis Health &amp; Pleasure Coach who has blended sexology, sex coaching, sexological body work, and cannabis education into this extraordinary practical alchemy of canna-infused pleasure. I was a total newb before this conversation, and what we cover totally blew my mind.Norelyn walks us through what’s important to know about how cannabis can support pleasure, factors that affect your cannabis sexperiences, and the elements of conscious cannabis use. There are so many practical takeaways, this is a great episode if you, like me, have been curious about cannabis and pleasure but had no clue where to begin!In this episode you will learn about: 1) The endocannabinoid system and its role in regulating disease and maintaining homeostasis in the body2) The goldilocks ratio of CBD to THC for optimal efficacy3) The importance of diet, environment, and companionship when engaging in cannabis useWant More Uncommon Pleasure?Join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group for the 5 Day Pleasure Diary Challenge. Get involved by going to SluttyActivism.groupAbout Today's Guest:Dr. Norelyn Parker is a graduate of Sex Coach U and is currently based out of Sacramento, California. She holds her PhD from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality and completed her Sexological Bodywork training at the European Academy of Somatic Education under the instruction of Joseph Kramer.Her academic studies have focused on intimacy within military relationships, which has expanded to include long distance relationships in general. Her most recent work has been focused on Cannabis and sex after completing her training to become a Certified Cannabis Coach and Educator. Her previous experience as a patient care advocate at a TMJ disorder clinic influences her interest in exploring the overlap between orofacial pain and vulvar pain disorders.Originally from Cordelia, California, Norelyn now lives in Sacramento. In her free time, you can find her often reading at poetry open mic nights, on a blues fusion dance floor, or playing the Ukulele. You can find more about her work at http://cannainfusedpleasure.coach/ Connect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production

Open wide, friend, and let’s take a deep throat… I mean, a deep dive on oral sex!Today, we're joined by Carla Crivaro on this special bonus episode of Slutty Activism to talk about the uncommon pleasure you can experience while giving oral sex.Carla is a certified Sex, Love &amp; Relationship Coach who works with men and women from around the world. When we got together, we went DEEP on oral. We talked about how oral sex is a taboo and what society says about people who do it, how this conditioning impacts our ability to actually enjoy giving and receiving oral sex, and how curiosity is the key to accessing pleasure while giving. I loved this conversation with Carla and did not want it to end!&nbsp;In this episode you will learn:1) The role of shame in preventing people from experiencing pleasure while giving oral sex2) The importance of being present and curious to experience pleasure while giving3) The difference between giving oral sex for pleasure and giving it for performanceResources mentioned in this episode:Dr. Betty Martin's Waking Up Your Hands exercise as a way to prepare yourself to hone in on pleasureSarah's guide to Dirty Talk 101, which includes giving genuine compliments as a course of pleasureWant More Uncommon Pleasure?Join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group for the 5 Day Pleasure Diary Challenge. Get involved by going to SluttyActivism.groupAbout Today's Guest:Carla Crivaro is a certified and trauma-informed Sex, Love &amp; Relationship Coach. She works internationally with men and women to help them understand themselves and each other, sexually and relationally, in and out of the bedroom.&nbsp;Here's where you can learn more about Carla online:Website: https://www.carlacrivaro.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carlacrivarocoaching/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the.sexuality.sanctuary/ Connect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production

Have you ever thought about practices of pleasure that expand beyond the human? What opportunties for pleasure exist in sensual connection to the More-Than-Human world?Today, we're joined by Jess Lieu on this special bonus episode of Slutty Activism to talk about the uncommon pleasure you can experience by developing a practice of ecosensuality.Jess is a Somatic Pleasure Educator who focuses on body based practices of pleasure, desire and consent. We explore what ecosensuality is, Jess’s journey with ecosensuality, and practical ways you can explore ecosensuality for the first time, including an example practice you can try out today. I really enjoyed this conversation and am so grateful to Jess for generously sharing this wisdom and for indulging all of my curious questions, as ecosensuality was pretty new to me!In this episode you will learn:1) What ecosensuality is2) Practical ways to explore ecosensuality3) How queer ecology challenges the systems of oppression that we live underWant More Uncommon Pleasure?Join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group for the 5 Day Pleasure Diary Challenge. Get involved by going to SluttyActivism.groupAbout Today's Guest:Jess is a Somatic Pleasure Educator who focuses on body based practices of pleasure, desire and consent. The intention of her practice is to hold space and guide people within safe enough containers to trust, value and express their body’s desires. She believes there's a galaxy of ways to express and experience our erotic nature and that through the altar of our bodies we are able to access our innate wisdom, integrity and ecological belonging.Here's where you can learn more about Jess online:Website: https://sensingsoma.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sensingsoma/&nbsp;Connect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production

Did you know that your sexuality can be a site of resistance against oppression? Listen to this episode to learn more and join the slutty activist movement to change the world with pleasure!"What do you want to do? If the answer is that you want to experience more pleasure, more connection, more joy, more honesty, more confidence... if the answer is you want to be a slutty activist and change this world with pleasure, then fucking come along and join me!"In this episode, you will learn:1. How sexuality can become a site of resistance against oppression2. The importance of community in the journey of sexual liberation3. The potential for immense personal growth by exploring your sexualityConnect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production

If you're looking for a way to explore your sexuality and learn how to create pleasure for yourself and others, then you need to check out this episode. We look at how to live a Pleasure-Focused life so that you can get the sexual liberation you deserve. You will learn how to become an extraordinary lover by dating yourself, priming for pleasure and savoring your sensuality!"In a world that wants you to be perpetually discontent, that says you aren't deserving, that seeks to keep you down and strip you of your power, pleasure is a radical act of resistance."Planet Earth is a paradise of sensual experience. We are the living inheritors of this place of immense splendor, each one of us miracles, living stardust, the universe experiencing itself. And within that experience of itself, the universe is clearly having quite a sexual time! The capacity we have for sexual pleasure, for erotic imagination, for fantasy and all sorts of sexual creativity, is tremendous. Given these facts, you have to stop and ask yourself, what the fuck is going on that so many people are so discontent? Why is there so much unpleasurable sex in the world? What can we do about it?In this episode, you will learn:1. Why there is so much unpleasurable sex in the world (hint: it's a systemic issue)2. How to take back your power to generate pleasure for yourself independent of your so called desirability3. The secret to becoming a highly adaptable, confident lover4. How your sensuality holds the key to being able to experience limitless pleasureConnect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production

Are you dealing with any of this? You have a hard time asking for what you want. You feel overwhelmed and exhausted from trying to please everyone all the time. You resent the people in your life who you feel are taking advantage of you. You have a hard time saying no to people.Then this episode is for you!"When you become someone that's easy to say no to, it becomes much easier for others to say yes."In this episode, you will learn the following:1. What it means to prioritize sex2. The importance of communication in sexual relationships3. The importance of setting boundaries in sexual relationshipsConnect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production

Do you want to feel more connected to your desire? Do you want to learn how to define your desires? Do you want to shift your thinking around sex, relationships, and pleasure?In this episode, I'm sharing the solution so that you can experience personal fulfillment. Why not start living the life you really want by learning to listen to your desires?"Remember, desire is the truth. It's your truth."Are you struggling to figure out what you want in life and how to get it? Are you always worried about what other people think of you and whether or not you're "normal." Often, this happens when you're struggling to with your authentic self and what your true desires are. It's not your fault that your relationship with desire is screwed up - that just means the system is working. Now you have the chance to repair it. The way to strengthen your connection with desire is through a process of resetting your expectations, defining your desires, and shifting your thinking. This work is challenging, but so worth it. With desire, you finally have a compass to guide you in life. The best part is that when you start living your truth, your relationships are far less work!In this episode, you will learn:1. How reconnecting with your authentic desires leads to a more fulfilling life2. How understanding and aligning your values, attitudes, and beliefs leads to more satisfying relationships3. The benefits of a more desire-led life... and a more desire-led worldResources:You can learn more about the extraordinary coach Natalie Miller on her website and by listening to her podcast Mind Witchery.Connect with me:If you're ready to change the world with pleasure, head over to SluttyActivism.com today!And to connect with other like minded people, come join us in the Slutty Activism Podcast Community group at SluttyActivism.groupCredits:Produced &amp; Hosted by Sarah MartinCover Art by Nik GothicMusic by eFly Production