How Porn Thrived in Secrecy in Our Marriage

In this episode of Consider Before Consuming, Richard and Heather share how pornography quietly impacted their marriage and what it took to begin healing together.Richard reflects on his early exposure to porn, how his use escalated over time, and how things shifted when he began engaging with performers online and realized that one woman he interacted with was being coerced into the industry. Heather shares her perspective as a partner, including the changes she noticed before the truth came out and how disclosure affected trust and intimacy.Together, they talk about secrecy, honesty, recovery, and why bringing pornography into the open became a turning point for both their marriage and their healing.Episode Resources:Article: Benefits of Quitting Porn According to 90 Real PeopleArticle: Why Watching Porn With My Partner Was a Terrible IdeaPodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 112: RobertPodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 140: Victoria SinisAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussion of early exposure to sexualized content and suicidal ideation. Listener discretion is advised.Ore Oduba is an actor, broadcaster, and podcaster based in the UK. In this episode, Ore shares his personal experience with pornography addiction, which began with early exposure in childhood and continued for decades.He explains how pornography shaped his understanding of intimacy, how secrecy and shame affected his mental health and relationships, and what finally led him to seek help and begin recovery. Ore also talks about parenting in the digital age, why kids need safe adults more than punishment, and how open, non-judgmental conversations can help protect young people from harm.This episode is sponsored by Relay, a secure peer-support app that connects you with a small group of people who understand what you’re going through and help you stay accountable on your journey to quit porn. Try Relay for free for 7 days at https://joinrelay.app.link/ftndAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussion of sexual violence, exploitation, and child sexual abuse. Listener discretion is advised.Heidi Olson is a Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner and the Founder and President of Paradigm Shift Training and Consulting.Drawing from years of frontline medical experience, Heidi explains why sexual exploitation and trafficking are often missed, how early exposure to pornography is shaping young people’s understanding of sex and consent, and why child-on-child sexual harm is becoming increasingly common. Episode Resources:Article: How Porn can Fuel Sexual Violence by Lessening Empathy in ConsumersPodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 17: Heidi OlsonConnect with Heidi: Paradigm ShiftRAINNCAC Training Materials: Culture ReframedAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

*This episode contains discussions about sexual exploitation and coercion. Listener discretion is advised.In this episode of Consider Before Consuming, former OnlyFans creator Taylor shares what the platform was really like—from the money promises that drew her in to the pressure, contracts, safety concerns, and identity toll that made her want out. Taylor talks about how hard it can be to leave once you’re in, what the industry expects from creators, and how stepping away impacted her mental health.Episode Resources:Article: The Problem with Parasocial Relationships on OnlyFansArticle: The Dangerous Quest for Fame on OnlyFansPodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 148: How OnlyFans Incentivizes Extreme ContentAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Porn addiction is often misunderstood, especially when it comes to how it actually develops in the brain and what real recovery looks like. In this episode, licensed clinical counselor and CSAT Chris Chandler breaks down the science behind compulsive porn use, why young brains are especially vulnerable, and how stress and porn can create a powerful cycle that’s hard to break.Chris also shares why porn addiction can mirror substance addiction in the brain, the role of emotional pain and loneliness, why relationships don’t automatically “fix” the problem, and what a realistic recovery process truly involves.This episode is sponsored by Relay, a secure peer-support app that connects you with a small group of people who understand what you’re going through and help you stay accountable on your journey to quit porn. CBC listeners can try Relay free for 30 days when they sign up at http://joinrelay.app/consider.Episode Resources:Article: How Porn Can Contribute to an Unhealthy Cycle of StressRelay: CBC Listeners get one month freePodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 126: Relay PanelTed Talk: My Stroke of InsightAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Ryan Ridgway is a mental health educator and former addiction support specialist from the UK. In this episode, he talks about his 20-year struggle with pornography use, OCD, and substance abuse. He explains how porn became his main way to cope with stress and mental illness, how that habit slowly took control of his life, and what recovery has looked like since. Ryan also discusses the connection between porn and self-esteem, body image, and mental health, and why honest conversation about these issues matters.Episode Resources:Article: Watching Porn May Be Negatively Impacting Your Mental HealthThis episode is sponsored by Relay: CBC Listeners get 40% Relay in November with code FTND40Follow Ryan on InstagramAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Trigger Warning: This episode contains brief references to childhood sexual abuse. Listener discretion is advisedToni Collier is a speaker, author, and founder of Broken Crayons Still Color, a global women’s organization helping people process brokenness and find hope. In this episode, Toni shares how being exposed to pornography as a child led to addiction, shame, and struggles with identity—and how she’s now creating a healthier, more open environment for her kids.She also talks about the power of community and connection in healing and parenting, reminding us that even when life feels messy or broken, beauty and growth are still possible.This episode is sponsored by Relay, a secure peer-support app that connects you with a small group of people who understand what you’re going through and help you stay accountable on your journey to quit porn. Try it today for 20% off! Episode Resources:Article: Why Fighting Porn Must Include Fighting ShamePodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 83: MyuniqueToni's WebsiteBark: Fighters get a free month!Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Kyle was first exposed to pornography at a young age, and it quickly became a coping mechanism that followed him into adulthood. In this episode, he and his wife, Maddie, share openly about how pornography impacted their marriage, shattering trust, creating betrayal trauma, and forcing them to confront hard truths about honesty and healing. Maddie offers her perspective as a partner navigating broken trust and the painful process of rebuilding safety in the relationship, while Kyle speaks to the challenges of recovery and overcoming shame. Together, they discuss what healing looks like in real time, showing both the difficulty and the hope that can exist when couples confront pornography’s impact head-on.Episode Resources:Video: Our Experience on Porn Recovery and Betrayal TraumaRecovery ResourcesAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of sexual violence, trafficking, and child sexual abuse material. Listener discretion is advised.OnlyFans is often marketed as a quick path to money and empowerment, but the reality tells another story. While a small fraction of creators earn millions, most make very little, and many feel pressured into increasingly extreme stunts to stand out—some involving hundreds or even thousands of partners, or content marketed as “barely legal.” At the same time, teens report being targeted with invitations to join the platform or consume its content, fueling harmful ideas about sex, consent, and exploitation.In this episode, Natale and Elisabeth look at the myths and realities of OnlyFans, the risks for creators and consumers, and how trafficking and child sexual abuse material have found their way onto the platform.Episode Resources:Podcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 140: Victoria SinisPodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 78: Jane Doe, Girls Do Porn Trafficking SurvivorRecovery ResourcesReuters Series: OnlyFans ExposedShare Your StoryEpisode CitationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

*This episode contains discussion of sexual violence, strangulation, deepfakes, and image-based exploitation. Listener discretion is advised.In this episode, we dive into the connection between pornography and sexual violence. From the prevalence of strangulation porn and its influence on real-world abuse, to the rise of AI deepfakes and image-based exploitation, to how social media is exposing kids to harmful content earlier than ever, this conversation highlights why awareness and action are so critical. Together, Natale and Elisabeth unpack the data, stories, and cultural trends shaping how pornography impacts individuals, relationships, and society, and how each of us can be part of the solution.Episode Resources:Episode CitationsShop: FTND StoreImage-Based Sexual Abuse ResourcesPodcast: Consider Before Consuming Ep. 96: Valiant RicheyAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy