Your Avoidant Ex Isn’t Over You: Understanding Deactivation

Your avoidant ex may seem completely over you. They may appear cold, detached, and completely certain about the breakup. But what looks like moving on can sometimes be something very different: deactivation. Watch on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GhzCGxomEJ4 In this episode, Coach Lee explains how avoidant attachment can cause someone to shut down or lose access to feelings that were once very real. He also discusses why pursuing an avoidant ex can reinforce their need for distance, how no contact can change the emotional dynamic, and why memories and feelings may begin to resurface once the pressure is gone. If your avoidant ex seems unaffected by losing you, don’t assume that what you’re seeing right now tells you the whole story. Get the Reunion Blueprint at ReunionBlueprint.com Get the Free Mini-Course on Saving A Marriage at MarriageRadio.com Book a Coaching Session With Coach Lee at MyExBackCoach.com/coaching

Watch the video version at https://youtu.be/-8c7nsmkbMo I recently sat down with my good friend, filmmaker Shane Stanley, for a candid conversation about relationships, marriage, life, friendship, filmmaking, and a lot more. We also talk about Shane's new film 6 Days in Evergreen, as well as The Legend of Van Dorn, which Shane directed and I had the privilege of starring in. Shane and I have become close friends through making Van Dorn, so this isn't really a traditional interview. It's two friends sitting down and talking openly about movies, relationships, the things we've learned along the way, and life in general. I really enjoyed this conversation and hope you will too. For more information about the movie Coach Lee starred in, see The Legend of Van Dorn at https://LegendofVanDorn.com See Coach Lee's website on saving relationships at https://MyExBackCoach.com For saving marriage relationships see https://MarriageRadio.com

Have you ever wondered why your ex seems so determined to stay broken up, even if the relationship was meaningful? One of the hardest parts of a breakup is watching someone who once loved you act certain they made the right decision. But what if that certainty isn't the whole story? In this video, Coach Lee explains why many people feel they need to stick with the breakup at first, why relief can be mistaken for certainty, and why trying to convince your ex to come back often has the opposite effect. You'll also learn why time is such an important part of the reconciliation process and how No Contact allows emotions to settle naturally. Whether you're hoping to get your ex back or simply trying to understand what they're thinking, this video will help you make sense of a confusing stage of the breakup process. If this video helps you, please like it, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs encouragement today. Get more help: ▶ Coaching/Consulting: https://myexbackcoach.com/coaching ▶ $7 Reunion Blueprint at https://ReunionBlueprint.com ▶ Save Your Marriage: https://www.marriageradio.com/  

After a breakup, your emotions can feel overwhelming. In fact, your pain may convince you of things that simply aren't true. It may tell you that your ex is already over you, that you've lost your chance forever, or that you need to do something immediately before it's too late. Those thoughts feel real because the pain is real. But feelings are not always facts. In this episode, I explain why heartbreak often distorts your thinking, the five biggest lies emotional pain tells you after a breakup, and how understanding those lies can help you avoid mistakes that hurt both your healing and your chances of reconciliation. If you're struggling with a breakup, wondering if your ex still loves you, considering the No Contact Rule, or simply trying to find peace after heartbreak, this episode is for you. Topics covered include: Why your ex may not actually be over you Why urgency after a breakup is often misleading The truth about social media after a breakup Whether you've really lost your chance forever Why your current pain won't last forever How to avoid making decisions based on fear instead of reality If this episode helps you, please consider following the podcast and sharing it with someone who needs encouragement after a breakup. Learn more and find additional resources: https://MyExBackCoach.com If your spouse wants a separation or divorce, you'll also find resources for married couples here. #breakup #heartbreak #nocontact #relationshipadvice #gettingyourexback

On YouTube at https://youtu.be/SH-XU_lP4mw Few things are more confusing than when an ex reaches out, starts a conversation, seems interested... and then suddenly disappears again. What happened? Did they change their mind? Were they just bored? Was it a test? Or is something else going on beneath the surface? In this episode, I explain some of the most common reasons an ex reaches out and then vanishes, including relief, curiosity, fear, uncertainty, emotional conflict, and the difference between wanting to reconnect and being ready to reconnect. If you've been left wondering what your ex's silence means after they reached out, this episode will help you understand the psychology behind the behavior and what it may reveal about where they are emotionally. Whether you're hoping to get your ex back or simply trying to make sense of their actions, you'll gain insight into what may be happening behind the scenes and how to avoid common mistakes that can push them further away. Want more help with your specific situation? Learn more about the Emergency Breakup Kit at MyExBackCoach.com/ebk

When a marriage feels like it’s slipping away, fear can cause people to make the very mistakes that push their spouse even further away. In this episode, Coach Lee explains the biggest mistake people make trying to save their marriage and how pressure, constant relationship talks, emotional reactions, and demands for reassurance can damage reconnection. Learn what actually helps rebuild closeness when your spouse is pulling away emotionally or talking about separation or divorce. Get my free mini-course on saving a marriage and learn practical strategies to stop pushing your spouse away and start rebuilding connection.

Why do exes often become colder after a breakup, especially right before they start missing you? In this episode, Coach Lee explains the emotional stages many dumpers go through after a breakup, why relief often comes before longing, and why cold behavior does not always mean the relationship is permanently over. You’ll learn: • Why emotional relief can make an ex seem detached • Why some exes pull away after reconnecting moments • Why missing you usually happens later, not immediately • How no contact changes emotional dynamics • And why reacting emotionally to coldness often pushes them further away If your ex has suddenly become distant, emotionally cold, or confusing after the breakup, this episode may help you understand what’s really happening beneath the surface. Book A Coaching Session With Coach Lee: https://myexbackcoach.com Emergency Breakup Kit: https://myexbackcoach.com/emergency-breakup-kit/

Watch the video of this podcast at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CivEbZen8bI Your ex is still watching you… but they won’t reach out. That’s not random and it’s not harmless. In this episode, you’ll learn exactly why they do it, what it means, and how it can actually work in your favor. Your ex is still watching your stories, checking your profile, or keeping tabs on you but they’re not reaching out. That situation is incredibly common after a breakup, and it leaves a lot of people confused, frustrated, and stuck. In this episode, I break down exactly why an ex watches you without making contact. You’ll understand the psychology behind their behavior, what they’re feeling (even if they don’t show it), and why they often stay silent even when they’re thinking about you. More importantly, I’ll explain how you should respond. Most people handle this situation in a way that actually pushes their ex further away. I’ll show you what actually works if you want your ex to come back, and what mistakes to avoid. This episode covers: Why your ex watches you but avoids reaching out The emotional conflict they’re dealing with What their silence really means How no contact plays into this dynamic What to do next if you want to turn things around If you’ve been wondering whether your ex still cares or if there’s still a chance, this will give you clarity and a plan. Get Coach Lee's Reunion Blueprint for just $7 at https://ReunionBlueprint.com

Watch on YouTube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SxxzC7JDvU After a breakup, one of the most confusing things you can experience is watching your ex act like none of it mattered. They seem fine. Unbothered. Maybe even happier. And it makes you question everything. In this episode, I’m going to explain why your ex may act like they don’t care, even when that’s not the full story. We’ll talk about emotional suppression, ego protection, and how people often deal with breakups very differently, especially in the early stages. I’ll also show you what their behavior actually means for your situation and whether it’s a sign that they’re truly over you… or just trying to convince themselves they are. If you’re struggling to understand their silence, their distance, or how quickly they seem to have moved on, this episode will give you clarity and help you respond in a way that actually works in your favor. If you want step-by-step guidance on how to handle this situation and increase your chances of getting your ex back, you can get my Emergency Breakup Kit at MyExBackCoach.com/ebk.

Watch the video version of this podcast at https://youtu.be/Ee3eb4D-AAo Not every breakup is as final as it seems. In this episode, I walk you through the key signs that a breakup may actually be temporary and what’s really going on beneath the surface when your ex pulls away. Many breakups happen in emotional moments, not from a clear, lasting decision. And when that’s the case, time and space can change everything. You’ll learn how to recognize when your ex didn’t expect your response, why emotional breakups often reverse, what it means if they move on too quickly, and the behaviors that show they’re not truly done with you. If you’re wondering whether your situation is over or just in a phase, this episode will help you see it more clearly and avoid the mistakes that can turn a temporary breakup into a permanent one. For a step-by-step plan, you can get my Reunion Blueprint for $7 at ReunionBlueprint.com. And if you want personal help, visit MyExBackCoach.com to book a coaching session.