127. Mad Libs Eulogy

This week on afterbite we say goodbye to the last good season of TVD. Elena’s sleepy, Tyler’s wolfy, Matt’s destined to be a cop now? There’s a lot going on here.

We’re Jolaric stans for life! Or for the rest of their lives. Or… well… you know...

TVD 06x20 | We continue to be proud haters. Lily makes a promise to Stefan. Alaric and Jo are Loser4Loser.

One thing about Lily Salvatore? She’s gonna be a hater and she’s gonna cause a kerfuffle. Caroline has an average airbnb experience. Enzo fixes his mommy issues. Damon develops more mommy issues. Perfectly balanced, or whatever.

TVD 06x18 | The Vampire Diaries writers kind of attempt to therapize their characters this week and they’re doing a pretty bad job of it! Elena is uncomfortable when we are not about her. We finally get Enzo’s full name! There’s gay people on screen! Matt’s secretly on grindr!

Good throuples and bad throuples abound this episode! Alaric and Enzo have the most efficient character arcs. I cut like 20 minutes of Pretty Little Liars talk, you’re welcome.

TVD 06x16 | Bee and Brian have too much fun with soundboards. Caroline is in her villain era. Literally nothing else matters but her evil schemes. Oh, Bonnie and Jeremy break up too but we've been there done that before.

TVD 06x12 | This is the most we’ve liked Elena in a while. Bonnie’s Blair Witchin’ it, Damon gives the worst advice in the world, and Lily Salvatore starts her road to girlbossification.

This episode is so cruel. We’re gonna cry. Jeremy leaves us but more importantly and heartbreakingly: Liz dies. That’s it, that’s the description. I’m too sad to write any more. Find us on socials: AfterbitePod

06x13 | Liv’s on a sinking ship and she’s LOVING IT. Kai makes a personality change. Caroline unearths a body in the woods.