539 | Sex, kink, and communication with Vida Carey

And We're Back!!! In episode 543 of ADHD reWired, host Eric Tivers returns to mark a new beginning for the podcast. Eric focuses this episode on recognizing and overcoming burnout. After 10 years of weekly episodes, plus other stressors in business and life,  the pace became unsustainable, leading him to experience significant burnout. Eric elaborates on these elements of burnout, describing emotional exhaustion as a deep-seated fatigue that impacts life engagement, depersonalization as growing detachment and cynicism towards work, and diminished personal achievement as a sense of ineffectiveness despite efforts. He recounts personal struggles, including a divorce and other stressors that exacerbated his burnout. Eric discusses the importance of meaningful alone time to recharge, using his motorcycle trips as an example of finding mental clarity and rebalancing life. He also outlines changes in his coaching seasons to ensure sustainability. Additionally, Eric introduces a new offering for Adult Study Hall where he will be leading members through a 5-week guided workshop for planning your year beginning November 20th, 2024.  Learn more at - Plus sign up with our new annual plan and get 37% off your membership. Join us for our Live Monthly Q &A every 2nd Tuesday of the Month at 10:30 AM PT / 1:30 PM PT. RSVP at Support ADHD reWired by becoming a Patron at   00:00 Welcome to ADHD reWired 01:19 Introduction to Season Two 02:40 Understanding Burnout 03:19 Emotional Exhaustion 04:48 Depersonalization and Cynicism 06:02 Reduced Personal Accomplishment 07:57 Diagnosing Burnout 09:47 Personal Journey and Realizations 13:03 Rebalancing Life and Work 14:25 Upcoming Coaching Groups and Community Events 18:50 Yearly Planning Sessions 21:27 Conclusion and Future Plans    

In this episode of ADHD reWired, Eric Tivers is joined by Mattia Mauree, an award-winning composer, poet, and host of the AUDHD Flourishing Podcast. Mattia shares their insights into the unique challenges faced by neurodivergent individuals, particularly those with ADHD and autism, as they navigate trauma, self-expression, and what they describe as "attention tunnels." Mattia opens up about their personal journey, discussing the impact of complex PTSD, disordered eating, and their late diagnoses of ADHD and autism. They explain how monotropism—having a narrower field of focus—shapes their experience as a neurodivergent person. Through the lens of monotropism, Mattia explores how being stuck in an attention tunnel can make transitioning to different tasks or social situations feel overwhelming and distressing. Eric and Mattia dive deep into the intersections of trauma and neurodivergence, examining how neurodivergent brains may be more easily traumatized, especially in environments that fail to meet their unique needs. They discuss the profound impact of neurodivergent parents raising neurodivergent children and the challenges of navigating systems that don’t support their differences. This conversation also highlights the importance of self-expression in healing and flourishing. Mattia explains how self-expression, rather than achievement, has become central to their definition of success, emphasizing the importance of creating work that resonates emotionally, even if it doesn't fit the traditional metrics of success. Other topics discussed include: The connection between hyperfocus and monotropism in ADHD and autism   How Mattia balances creativity, self-care, and flourishing as a neurodivergent individual   The complexity of navigating trauma in neurodivergent families   The importance of community and support systems for neurodivergent creatives and entrepreneurs This episode is a must-listen for anyone interested in understanding the complex interplay of trauma, neurodivergence, and flourishing. Whether you identify as neurodivergent or are simply curious about these experiences, this conversation offers valuable insights into the importance of creating space for self-expression, healing, and growth. Connect with Mattia Mauree: Website:   Podcast: Support ADHD reWired on Patreon: If you’ve enjoyed this episode and want to support the podcast, consider becoming a patron at . Your support helps keep the podcast going and brings more episodes to listeners like you! Join ADHD reWired Coaching and Accountability Groups: Our coaching groups return this fall! Learn how to manage your ADHD more effectively in a supportive, community-based program. Visit to get all the details.

In episode 541 host Eric Tivers speaks with licensed marriage and family therapist Alex Bache about digital addiction and its impact on ADHD, anxiety disorders, and OCD, particularly in adolescents and young adults. The discussion covers identifying behavioral addictions, the role of dopamine in addiction, and interventions like motivational interviewing and harm reduction. They also explore the balance between gaming for social connection and potential addiction, offering strategies for parents and individuals. Additionally, Eric updates listeners on his coaching groups and upcoming plans for the podcast.  Topics Include: Addressing Digital Addiction Meet Alex Bache: Expert on Digital Behavioral Addictions Understanding Behavioral Addiction Game Transfer Phenomena Explained Interventions for Digital Addiction The Role of Harm Reduction Digital Hygiene Practices The Power of Accountability and Connection Reflecting on Changes in ADHD Coaching Gaming and Social Connection Managing Screen Time Collaboratively Balancing Screen Time and Family Activities Recognizing Digital Addiction Conclusion and Contact Information Connect with Alex at

Welcome back to another episode of ADHD reWired. Our guest today is Dr. Gilly Khan, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist who specializes in working with children, teens, and young adults dealing with anxiety, depression, and ADHD. In this episode, Dr. Khan shares her personal journey with ADHD, discusses the impact of hormonal fluctuations on ADHD symptoms, and offers practical advice on improving emotional regulation and social skills. Dr. Gilly Khan's Journey with ADHD Dr. Gilly Khan was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 33, a revelation that came as no surprise to her. Like many women, she had suspected for years that she might have ADHD. Her journey towards diagnosis began when she noticed ADHD symptoms in her young daughter, leading her to seek a diagnosis for herself. Encouraged by a colleague who was open about her ADHD diagnosis, Dr. Khan decided to embrace her neurodiversity and advocate for herself and her clients. The Impact of Hormonal Fluctuations on ADHD One of the most significant insights Dr. Khan offers is the connection between hormones, particularly estrogen, and ADHD symptoms. She explains that hormonal fluctuations can significantly impact mood, memory, and overall ADHD symptoms. This is crucial for women, especially during periods of hormonal change such as menstruation, pregnancy, and menopause. Dr. Khan shares her personal experience with migraines, which she began having in college, and later discovered were linked to estrogen levels. Her experience highlights the importance of considering hormonal influences when diagnosing and treating ADHD in women. Practical Advice for Emotional Regulation Dr. Khan emphasizes that medication can significantly help reduce ADHD symptoms, including emotional dysregulation. However, she also discusses the importance of practical strategies to manage emotions. One key approach is to take a time-out when feeling overwhelmed and practice coping skills like deep breathing in a calm environment before re-engaging with the situation. Dr. Khan's recommendation to include parents in the process is particularly insightful. Coaching parents to help their children recognize emotional dysregulation and use coping strategies can make a significant difference. Social Skills in ADHD Addressing social skills, Dr. Khan discusses the effectiveness of social skills groups, especially when tailored to the needs of neurodivergent individuals. She notes the importance of applied practice and the role of parents in coaching their children outside of therapy sessions. For adults with ADHD, Dr. Khan suggests finding activities and clubs that align with their interests to facilitate meeting like-minded individuals. She also highlights the importance of planning social interactions, just like planning professional activities, to maintain relationships. Overcoming Social Challenges Both Eric and Dr. Khan share personal anecdotes about the challenges of remembering names and maintaining social connections. Practical tips such as using a planner to schedule social activities and taking photos to remember names illustrate how even small strategies can make a big difference. Advocacy and Self-Education Dr. Khan stresses the importance of self-advocacy and educating oneself about ADHD. She advises seeking out credible resources and being prepared to discuss specific symptoms and experiences with healthcare providers. Her message is clear: understanding and advocating for one’s own neurodiversity is crucial for effective treatment and self-acceptance. Conclusion Dr. Gilly Khan’s insights provide a deeper understanding of the complexities of ADHD, particularly in women. From the impact of hormonal fluctuations to practical strategies for emotional regulation and social skills, her expertise offers valuable guidance for both individuals with ADHD and those supporting them. To learn more about Dr. Gilly Khan, her work, and her upcoming book on emotional dysregulation, visit her website at drgillykhan.com and follow her on Instagram at @drgillykhan. Thank you for tuning into ADHD reWired. If you found this episode helpful, consider supporting the podcast on Patreon, and don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode. Together, we can continue to learn, grow, and support one another in our ADHD journeys. *Shownotes generated by Ai

In episode 539 of ADHD reWired, host Eric Tivers welcomes neurodivergent coach Vida Carey, who specializes in sex and relationships. Together, they dive into conversations about sexuality, intimacy, and the unique challenges faced by neurodivergent individuals in these areas. Vida shares her experiences and provides insights on discussing sex openly, defining kink, exploring different relationship structures, and addressing sexual desires in a shameless and authentic manner. The episode emphasizes the importance of communication, understanding personal needs, and fostering intimacy while managing ADHD. Additionally, the podcast highlights resources and support available through ADHD reWired’s coaching programs and virtual community. Navigating ADHD and Intimacy: Conversations with Neurodivergent Coach Vida Carey In episode 539 of ADHD reWired, host Eric Tivers welcomes Vida Carey, a neurodivergent coach specializing in sex and relationships, who emphasizes comfort through humor and candid vulnerability. The discussion delves into the unique challenges of navigating sexual intimacy for those with ADHD, including overcoming societal norms, advocating for oneself, and understanding hyper- and hyposexuality. Vida shares her insights on redefining sex, utilizing intimacy menus, and having open conversations about one's desires. Additionally, the episode addresses the importance of developing healthy communication practices in relationships and offers a humorous yet candid look into making sex a more comfortable topic for neurodivergent individuals. The episode closes with reflections on how neurodivergent couples can better understand and support each other's needs. 00:00 Introduction to ADHD reWired 01:08 Meet Coach Vida Carey 02:36 Navigating Sex and Relationships 05:13 Understanding Kink and Communication 07:31 Advocating for Yourself in the Bedroom 10:16 Exploring Sexual Desires and Intimacy 18:33 Sex Rewards and Intimacy Menus 22:33 ADHD reWired Coaching Groups 28:38 Hyper and Hyposexuality in Neurodivergent Brains 30:44 The Reality of Life and Sex 31:48 Hypersexuality vs. Sexual Addiction 32:49 Exploring Relationship Structures 36:32 Navigating Intimacy and Communication 38:27 The Journey to Intimacy Coaching 41:41 Common Questions About Sex 47:51 The Importance of Communication in Sex 56:01 Final Thoughts and Resources

Episode 538 of the ADHD reWired podcast, hosted by Eric Tivers, addresses the complexities and intersections of neurodivergence (ADHD and autism) and LGBTQ identities. The episode features a panel discussion from a NeuroDivergent Pride event, co-hosted by Chris Wang from Shimmer. The panel includes Eric, Nate, and Vida, who share their personal journeys of coming out as queer and neurodivergent. They discuss the challenges of navigating societal expectations, masking, and the importance of supportive communities. The episode also emphasizes the impact of visibility and advocacy in both the ADHD and LGBTQ communities, encouraging listeners to join supportive spaces and take steps to be proud of their identities. 03:24 NeuroDivergent Pride Panel Introduction 09:14 Panelists Share Their Stories 22:34 Exploring Neurodivergent and Queer Identities 31:55 Impact of Heteronormative and Neurotypical Expectations 38:04 High-Level Masking and Personal Experiences 38:50 Coming Out and Family Reactions 40:40 Navigating Identity and Cultural Expectations  43:37 Unmasking and Embracing Neurodivergence 46:06 Challenges of Masking and Survival Strategies 53:30 The Continuous Process of Coming Out 01:04:12 Getting Involved in Neurodivergent and LGBTQ Communities 01:13:29 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

📣Registration is OPEN for our Summer Coaching and Accountability Groups - Learn more at  🏳️‍🌈Free Neurodivergent Pride Month Panel is this Thursday at 1:30 PM PT / 4:30 PM ET - Register at   This week we focused on the importance of planning for the future and prioritizing meaningful activities, with what Eric likes to think of as "Big Heart Week." The coaches emphasized the need to direct energy towards activities that provide a sense of purpose and emotional fulfillment and shared their personal experiences with setting and achieving goals. The discussion also revolved around creating and reviewing bucket lists as a way to connect with one's inner desires and plan for meaningful experiences. Prioritizing Meaningful ActivitiesIn the latest episode of the Adhd Rewired podcast, Eric, Coach Kristen, and Coach Brian discussed the importance of planning for the future and prioritizing meaningful activities. The theme of the week was "Big Heart Week," focusing on issues that might be difficult to confront. Brian emphasized the significance of directing energy towards activities that provide a sense of purpose and emotional fulfillment rather than just productivity. Eric concurred, stressing the need to recognize the unpredictability of life and carve out time for activities that matter. The coaches shared their experiences of helping clients approach these topics and encouraged listeners to reflect on their own priorities. Discussing Personal Bucket Lists and Goals Eric encouraged members to plan for their long-term goals and dreams, and initiated a discussion about personal bucket lists. Coach shared that she has noticed a pattern among members where practical considerations, such as creating a will or planning for children, often come up when making bucket lists. This realization has led to more intentional goal-setting and planning. The group also recognized the value of sharing and knowing each other's dreams and aspirations.   Shared Projects, Accomplishments, and Motivation An anecdote was shared about a person's enthusiasm and eagerness to move forward with a shared project. Eric then discussed the joy he found in seeing group members sharing their accomplished bucket list items, finding it both entertaining and inspiring. Brian, who participated in an annual bikeathon fundraiser for the Aids Life Cycle, shared his personal experience of setting a goal to participate in the event, initially hesitant due to self-doubt, but eventually realizing his capability to achieve it. His accomplishment provided him a sense of enrichment and motivation in all areas of his life.   Creating and Celebrating Bucket-List Experiences Eric emphasized the importance of creating and reviewing a bucket list as a way to connect with one's inner desires and plan for meaningful experiences. He suggested that people should be intentional about their bucket lists, allowing themselves to enjoy the anticipation of upcoming experiences and celebrating achievements along the way. Coach Kristin added that unexpected experiences also qualify as bucket-list items and should be recognized and celebrated. The team also shared personal bucket-list items, including Eric's story of a delightful experience at a clothing-optional campsite.

Introduction to the Episode: Eric Tivers welcomes listeners back and introduces the current season (36) Main Topic: The discussion focuses on self-care and numbing behaviors. Eric emphasizes the importance of understanding the differences between intentional self-care and behaviors that serve as emotional numbing. The context is week 6 of the program where these topics are explored in detail. Intentional Self-Care vs. Numbing: The dialogue underscores the need for mindfulness in distinguishing between self-care activities that genuinely contribute to well-being and behaviors that might temporarily mask emotional distress. Impact of Self-Care: The conversation also touches on the positive impacts of being intentional about self-care practices, possibly suggesting strategies or insights into improving mental health and managing symptoms of ADHD through mindful self-care rather than numbing. These insights reflect an ongoing commitment to addressing complex emotional behaviors in the context of managing ADHD, with a focus on improving overall mental health and awareness.   *This summary was generated using Ai

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Welcome back to another episode of ADHD reWired! This episode is part of a special series we're calling the Coaches Roundtable, where ADHD reWired Coaches Brian Entler and Kristin Marts join me to discuss what's happening in our coaching and accountability groups each week. This week we're diving into the content from the 4th week of our coaching and accountability groups. This week, we're discussing importance of building strong foundations around habits and routines as an essential precursor to more effective daily and weekly planning.  Come join us for our Summer Coaching and Accountability Groups. Take advantage of Early Bird Pricing by registering before May 27th. Learn more at Key Topics Discussed: Introduction: Eric Tivers welcomes listeners and introduces the special series focusing on the content from the 4th week of the coaching and accountability groups. Foundational Strategies: Eric, Kristin, and Brian discuss the importance of establishing routines as a strong foundations for managing ADHD. They share personal experiences and professional insights on creating routines and habits that support productivity and well-being. Tracking Progress: The conversation shifts to the significance of tracking progress. Eric explains how tracking can provide valuable insights and help in adjusting strategies for better outcomes. Kristin and Brian share their favorite tools and techniques for effective tracking. Sleep Management: Brian discusses the critical role of sleep management and shares tips on establishing a nighttime routine. The importance of consistent sleep patterns and how they can impact ADHD symptoms is highlighted. Engaging in Routines: Kristin shares her group's experiences with engaging in morning routines and how small adjustments can lead to significant improvements in managing ADHD symptoms. Personal Stories: Eric, Kristin, and Brian share personal anecdotes about their own routines, sleep management, and tracking progress, providing relatable and practical advice for listeners. Closing Remarks: Eric wraps up the episode with key takeaways and encourages listeners to implement the discussed strategies in their daily lives.