364- How to Respond to Triggering Phrases Like, “I Hate You” with Rachel and Alyssa (Rebroadcast)

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today we're bringing you a special rebroadcast of one of our most popular episodes. The village keeps coming back to this one, and for good reason. In this episode, Rachel and I dive into those moments when kids say things that feel rude, hurtful, or even shocking. We unpack why these behaviors often come from a place of dysregulation, what might be going on beneath the surface, and how to respond in a way that builds connection instead of shame. We also talk about what it looks like to model emotional regulation and healthy repair, even when we're triggered ourselves, and why it's okay to be a work in progress. These are themes we go even deeper into in our book Big Kids, Bigger Feelings, which is out now and full of tools to help you navigate these moments with more confidence and compassion. All right, folks, let's dive in. Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today we’re diving into a conversation that so many parents are craving—but often don’t know how to start. I got to sit down with Dr. Hina Talib to talk about body image and development in the pre-teen years—those ages nine to twelve when so much is changing, inside and out. We explored how to navigate this stage with empathy, how to foster open communication with kids around their bodies, and how to create a home environment where curiosity and big feelings are welcomed—not shut down. We also talked about the impact of societal pressures, how to model healthy relationships with food and body image, and when it might be time to bring in expert support. This episode is an invitation to show up with compassion—for yourself, and for your growing-not-so-little one—as they move through this pivotal season of development. Alright folks, let’s dive in. VOYV Podcast Episodes Mentioned: ⁠How (and When) to Talk to Your Kids About Porn, with Dr. Cara Natterson and Vanessa Kroll Bennett ⁠ ⁠Setting the Stage for Shame-Free Puberty with Melissa Pintor Carnagey ⁠ ⁠How To Make Puberty and Sex Talks Less Awkward with Dr. Cara Natterson and Vanessa Kroll Bennett  Connect with Dr Hina: Full bio: here Instagram: @teenhealthdoc  Website: https://www.drhinatalib.com/ https://www.atria.org/ Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today we’re getting into something that hits deep for so many of us, especially around the holidays.You plan something special—a magical outing, a thoughtful gift—and you’re met with “Is that it?” or “What are we doing next?” It can feel like a gut punch. In this episode, we’re unpacking what’s really going on when kids seem to crave more—more stuff, more stimulation, more everything—and why it can be so triggering for us as adults.We’ll explore the post-gift letdown, the impact of dopamine on kids’ brains, and the tension between gratitude and instant gratification in a world that moves fast. We’re also diving into the real-life challenges: navigating over-gifting from family, helping siblings through comparison, and what to say when a well-meaning grandparent crosses a boundary.This episode is full of practical strategies and gentle reminders that parenting during the holidays doesn’t have to feel like a performance. We talk about how to make space for both joy and disappointment, and why letting kids fully experience the moment—even if it’s messy—is actually the magic.Alright folks, let’s dive in. VOYV Episodes on Sensory Regulation: 315- When Your Nervous System is Overwhelmed by Your Child's Sensory Needs with OT Larissa Geleris: Round Two 316- Sensory Regulation for High Energy Kids with OT Julia Ieslin: Round Two 306-Sensory Need or Behavioral Challenge? With Madeha Ayub, OT 298- Update: After School Dysregulation with Lori Goodrich, OT Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Before we dive in: this episode includes discussion of masturbation, sex and other adult topics. You're listening to Voices of Your Village and today's episode is such a treat. I got to sit down with Rachelle Bergstein to talk about her work on the incredible Judy Blume, and the impact her stories have had across generations. We talk about censorship, the importance of letting kids ask big questions, and what it means to create space for children to explore who they are without shame. We dig into the nuances of parenting and what it looks like to support individuality while staying deeply connected. Don't forget to check out Rachelle's book, The Genius of Judy Blume. All right, folks, let's dive in. Connect with Rachelle: Instagram: @rachellewb Website: https://www.rachellebergstein.com/ Order the book: The Genius of Judy: How Judy Blume Rewrote Childhood for All of Us Podcast Episodes Mentioned: How (and When) to Talk to Your Kids About Porn, with Dr. Cara Natterson and Vanessa Kroll Bennett  Setting the Stage for Shame-Free Puberty with Melissa Pintor Carnagey  How To Make Puberty and Sex Talks Less Awkward with Dr. Cara Natterson and Vanessa Kroll Bennett  Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to voices of your village. And today I'm joined by my incredible friend Dr. Tracy. She is a clinical psychologist, couples therapist, and author of the new book, You, Your Husband and His Mother. This was such a fun conversation. We got honest and had just compassionate conversation about what it looks like to show up as both a partner and a parent, while also navigating those tricky extended family dynamics. We dug into the challenges so many of us face with in-laws, with our own parents, and how setting boundaries can actually create more connection, not less. We talked about the pressure to be everything to everyone, and how tuning in to your own needs and voice is a game changer for your relationship, your parenting, and your peace. I loved getting to connect with Tracy, not just as a professional, but as two humans sharing this season of life. All right, folks, let's dive in. Connect with Dr. Tracy: Instagram: @DrTracyD Website: drtracyd.com Order the book: You, Your Husband, and His Mother: Create a Healthy Relationship with Your Mother-in-Law--and Your Spouse--in Five Simple Steps Podcast: Dear Dr. Tracy Alyssa's episodes on Dear Dr. Tracy: Big Kids Bigger Feelings: Parenting Through the Ages 5-12 Shift with Alyssa Blask Campbell Emotional Intelligence: Fostering it in Our Children Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Pre-order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today I’m joined by Devon Kuntzman, toddler expert and author of Transforming Toddlerhood.Devon and I dig into the beautiful chaos of the toddler years—what’s developmentally normal, what we often mislabel as “bad behavior,” and how we can meet kids where they are, not where we wish they were. We talk about boundaries, temperament, and why embracing imperfection might just be your parenting superpower.Whether you’re deep in the toddler trenches or supporting someone who is, this conversation is full of permission, perspective, and practical tools.Alright folks, let’s dive in. Connect with Devon: Instagram: @transformingtoddlerhood Website: www.transformingtoddlerhood.com Order the book: Transforming Toddlerhood: How to Handle Tantrums, End Power Struggles, and Raise Resilient Kids---Without Losing Your Mind Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Voices Of Your Village, and today I'm joined by someone I deeply respect. Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart, clinical psychologist and author of the brand new book Love the Teen You Have. In this episode, we dive into the often messy world of parenting tweens and teens. Dr. Lockhart and I explore how connection, not control, is the foundation for healthy, respectful relationships with our kids as they grow. We talk about how to navigate conflict, what it means to truly see your child, and why boundaries and belonging aren't opposites. This conversation is packed with real tools and grounded wisdom for anyone parenting through the big feelings and growing independence of adolescence. Alright, folks, let's dive in. Connect with Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart: Instagram: @dr.annlouise.lockhart Website: www.anewdaysa.com and www.drannlouiselockhart.com Order the book: Love the Teen You Have: A Practical Guide to Transforming Conflict into Connection Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today I get to sit down with my friend Jennie Monness, founder of the We Didn't Turn Out OK Podcast and fellow parent navigating the messy, meaningful work of raising tiny humans. In this conversation, Jennie and I talk about the dissonance so many of us feel between the parent we thought we'd be and the one we actually are. We explore what it means to show up with self-awareness, to build visual routines that support our kids through transitions, and to lean into repair when things don't go as planned. We both share some real life stories, moments when we got it right-- and moments when we didn't. This episode is an invitation to let go of perfection and embrace the learning curve together. All right, folks. Let's dive in. Connect with Jennie: Instagram: @jenniemonness Website: https://www.jenniemonness.com/ Charmspring: https://charmspring.com/ Springboard Visual Routine Podcast: We Didn’t Turn Out OK with Jennie Monness Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Pre-order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and I am so jazzed to share this episode with you because if you've ever worried about your child falling behind, wondered whether a diagnosis would help or hurt or felt overwhelmed by navigating learning differences, this one's for you. I got to sit down with Dr. Kelly Fradin, pediatrician and author of Advanced Parenting to unpack how we can support our kids when they're struggling, not just academically, but emotionally and socially too. Kelly has this whole child approach that I just adore. We dove into how to talk to kids about brain and body differences in a way that builds identity and confidence, how to manage the big emotions that come up for us as parents when something feels off, and how to advocate for your kid while keeping their mental health front and center. This episode is rich with practical tools and so much compassion. I'm excited to bring it to you, and after the conversation, stick around for the breakdown with Rachel, my co-author of Big Kids, Bigger Feelings where we reflect on what this looks like in real life. All right, let's dive in. Connect with Kelly: Instagram: @adviceigivemyfriends Website: https://drkellyfradin.com/ Order the book:  Advanced Parenting: Advice for Helping Kids Through Diagnoses, Differences, and Mental Health Challenges Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Pre-order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Voices of Your Village, and today I got to hang out with science journalist and author Melinda Wenner Moyer to talk about something that so many of us wrestle with-- how to talk to our kids about the hard stuff. From climate change to inequality, to violence in the news, it can feel overwhelming to know what to say, when to say it, or even if we should say anything at all. Melissa's book, How to Raise Kids who Aren't Assholes, gave so many parents tools for raising kind, thoughtful humans. And her new book, Hello, Cruel World! continues that work by helping us navigate these tricky conversations with clarity, honesty, and compassion. In this episode, we dive into how to avoid toxic positivity without overwhelming our kids, how to model emotional regulation while still being real, and how to raise resilient humans in a world that doesn't always make it easy. All right folks, let's dive in. Connect with Melinda: Instagram: @melindawmoyer Facebook: facebook.com/melindawennermoyer  X: @lindy2350 Website: melindawennermoyer.com Order the book: Hello, Cruel World! Substack: Now What Connect with us: Instagram and TikTok: @seed.and.sew  Seed and Sew's NEW Regulation Questionnaire: Take the Quiz Pre-order Big Kids, Bigger Feelings now!  Website: seedandsew.org Credits: Host: Alyssa Blask Campbell Co-host: Rachel Lounder Production/Editing: Kristin Mork-McVeigh Graphics: Kayla Kurkland-Davis/ Beki Rohrig Music by: Ruby Adams and  Bensound Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices