351. How gratitude changes your brain

We’re always told that gratitude is the route to happiness – that we should be grateful for every experience we have. But when life feels like it’s falling apart, gratitude can feel less like a comfort and more like pressure. In reality, gratitude and pain often have to coexist. In this episode, we ask whether gratitude actually does make us happier - what it really is, how it rewires the brain, and why it sometimes feels impossible. We explore: •        What makes gratitude so powerful•        The cognitive and neuroscientific mechanisms behind gratitude•        Toxic gratitude when life simply feels hard•        The gratitude paradox•        The guilt associated with not being grateful enough•        Some alternatives for when gratitude feels inaccessible If you’ve ever struggled with the idea that you ‘should’ be thankful for the hard times in life, this episode is for you.   ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It sounds simple. Split the rent, share space, maybe finally stop packing an overnight bag. But living together is one of the biggest relationship transitions of our twenties, and it brings with it some very real psychological, emotional, and even social shifts.In this episode, we unpack the questions around living with your partner in your 20s - what it means, what it changes, and what it reveals.  We explore:•        The pros and cons of moving in together•        Why living together can feel like forming a ‘chosen family’ •        The pressure of societal and family expectations to hit the next milestone•        The hidden dynamics of cohabitation•        Why fairness, communication, and space matter more than perfection•        The five questions to ask yourself before you take the leap Whether you’re moving in with your partner, thinking about it, or reflecting on a past experience, this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]  The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You know that feeling when time disappears, your focus sharpens, and everything just clicks? That’s what we often call ‘flow state’ - a powerful experience of total immersion where effort feels effortless. In today’s bonus episode, we uncover what flow really is, how it works, and why finding it might just change how you think about focus and fulfilment. We explore: •       What the flow state actually is•       The history and psychology behind the concept•       What it feels like, and how to know you’ve reached it•       Why some people find it easier to access than others•       What’s happening in your brain during flow•       Practical ways to find it in your own life Listen now! ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Extreme thinness is back in trend (again) so today, we explore the psychology behind why and the impact its having? In this episode, we'll discuss the rise of skinnytok and how this so-called ‘wellness’ version of thinness convinces us to be smaller, neater, cleaner, more controlled. What to expect: •        How to tell whether content is skinnytok aligned•        Links to orthorexia and the demonisation of food groups•        What does this say about politics?•        The role of weight loss drugs •        Why female bodies are so policed•        How to counteract the impact of skinnytok If you’ve ever felt smaller after scrolling – physically or emotionally - this episode is for you. For professional help:  The Butterfly Foundation National Eating Disorder Organisation   Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]  ORDER MY BOOK The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Have you ever felt that urge for payback? Revenge is one of the oldest, most universal human instincts. It seems like it promises justice, balance, or even peace. But why does it so often leave us feeling worse, not better? In this episode, we dive into the psychology of revenge - what drives it, what it costs us, and why our brains find it so hard to let go. We explore: •        Why revenge feels so intoxicating•        The difference between impulsive and planned revenge•        Who might be more prone to act out revenge•        The negative effects of seeking it out•        Why acting on our need can leave us feeling worse•        The push and pull behind human morality•        Empathy, success and silence as alternatives If you’ve ever replayed an argument in your head or imagined getting even, this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Everyone is secretly searching for the perfect relationship, but what if your relationship is just 'good enough'? What if you feel secure, or fine about the person you're with but secretly want more? In today's episode we break down what it means to settle in your 20s, including:  The pressure to be 'coupled up' during your 20s How milestone anxiety creates unfulfilled relationships  What settling looks and feels like  How to tell if it's just relationships anxiety  3 questions to ask yourself if you're thinking about leaving  Listen now!  ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]  The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We think of failure as a terrible thing or something to be avoided. But when you learn to fall in love with failure, a whole new level of growth occurs that will have you seeing progress faster than ever. In our 20s, the so called failure-decade, we talk about how you can learn to fail, including:  The reasons we fear failure  Why our definition of success is inaccurate and socially conditioned  The relationship successful people have with success  Why grit matters more than IQ  Why your fear of failure is keeping you behind 5 ways to ritualise failure in your daily life + more  Listen now to change your entire mindset towards setbacks!  ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]  The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We’ve all heard the term thrown around – in books, in TV dramas, in news articles – we’re taught to be scared of it. But rarely do we consider what it actually means. In today’s bonus episode, we take a look at sociopathy. We explore: Differentiating sociopathy and psychopathy Common misconceptions Early origins of the term The role of self-awareness and masking in sociopathy Whether all sociopaths are bad Treatments and management for sociopathy Listen now! ORDER MY BOOK: https://www.psychologyofyour20s.com/book Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Have you ever felt like everything in your late twenties is suddenly up for grabs - your relationships, your career, even who you thought you were? It might be your Saturn return - a period of upheaval, self-reflection, and big life questions that’s as much psychological as it is astrological. In this episode, we look at the psychology behind Saturn returns - why this age feels so turbulent, what’s happening in our minds and lives. We explore:•        The astrological background of Saturn returns•        Why humans are drawn to these kinds of explanations•        Dynamic shifts of our relationships, friendships and family dynamics•        Uncertainty and mismatches in our 20s•        Why upheaval can be good for us•        Strategies to navigate this period  If you’ve ever wondered why the end of your twenties feels like some huge cosmic challenge, this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Have you ever felt like the world around you isn’t quite real, or like you’re watching your life from the outside? Have you ever driven somewhere and suddenly wondered how you got there? It might be dissociation - a surprisingly common psychological experience that can be both protective and, at times, unsettling. In this episode we look at the psychology behind dissociation – what is going on in our bodies and brains during this state, what triggers us and how it interacts with wider factors in our lives. We explore:•        The science of why we freeze in this state•        How it can help us cope, and when it becomes maladaptive•        Interactions with ADHD, trauma and survival mode•        Why it feels so unsettling•        Strategies to pull you back in•        Reminders for when we don’t feel real If you’ve ever felt like you were living on autopilot, this episode is for you. ORDER MY BOOK Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast For business: [email protected]    The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.