Self-regulation starts with co-regulation. Interview with Martha B. Straus, PhD

Martha B Straus, PhD is an emeritus professor of clinical psychology at Antioch University New England. She is the author of seven books including No-Talk Therapy for Children and Adolescents, a book that has truly stood the test of time and is a favorite of mine. Today we are primarily talking about her most recent book Cool, Calm & Connected: A Workbook for Parents and Children to Co-regulate, Manage Big Emotions & Build Stronger Bonds If we are  going to help our child who is either very anxious or struggling with another "big feeling" it is critical that we don't get caught up in the excitement but remain as the title of book suggests cool, calm and connected. Easier said that done. Her workbook breaks this task down into manageable steps.   

David Russ, PhD is a clinical psychologist  specializing in anxiety disorders and is the founding partner of the Carolinas Counseling Group in Charlotte, North Carolina. He and Christopher T McCarthy created the audio program for children Turnaround: Turning Fear into Freedom which I have to be a very useful resource for anxious children. He and Anna S. Christie have written Emetophobia: Understanding and Treating Fear of Vomiting in Children and Adults . For the purposes of this podcast, Dr Russ e-book for children, Emetophobia: The Ultimate Kids' Guide available as a kindle book is a must have for parents and children.  Emetophobia is a very common but understudied phobia. Dr Russ is one the leading authorities on the treatment of Emetophobia  and he generously shares his wisdom about treating this condition in our discussion   Links to Dr Russ and Emetophobia are listed below https://carolinascounseling.info/david https://emetophobia.net/

In this podcast, I talked with Dr Gordon Flett about the psychology of mattering, a topic in which he has been a leader in the field. Mattering is a core component of one's self concept which refers to a genral sense of being significant, and valued in our relationships. A felt sense of mattering is a strongly protective factor against a variety stressors. Conversely, the absence of mattering has been associated with depression and suicidal ideation. A sense of mattering becomes especially relevant  during the adolescent years as fitting in with peers becomes so important The importance of mattering is an idea that immediately resonates with many people and is the  theme in movies such as It's a Wonderful Life and Mr Holland's Opus. Unfortunately, in keeping with the crisis in youth mental health, survey data suggest that about 30% of adolescents do not feel or are not certain that they matter to anyone. So this is obviously an important topic for us to consider Dr Flett has written two books on the psychology of Mattering: Mattering As A CORE Need in Children and Adolescents  and The Psychology of Mattering: Understanding the Human Need to be Significant In an earlier podcast  on 9/13/22, I also talked to Dr Flett about his book he coauthored with Paul Hewitt Perfectionism in Childhood and Adolescence: A Developmental Approach The Mattering Movement website is an excellent source of information https://www.thematteringmovement.com/ see also https://www.nytimes.com/2023/09/27/well/mind/mental-health-mattering-self-esteem.html  

Lisa Danahy is a registered  yoga therapist  who recently published Creating Calm in Your Classroom: A Mindfulness-Based Movement Program for Social-Emotional Learning in Early Childhood Education. She also directs www.CreateCalm.org a nonprofit organization dedicated to educational programming for schools, teachers, children and special populations. Although her book is focused on the classroom, it is actually quite appropriate for families and health care professionals. She emphasizes the importance of understanding the energy level of the child in front of you and what their body  may need in order to function optimally. In her book, she has a series of movement exercises appropriate to the different energy levels a child may show especially around transitions. In the interview, we talk movement/breathing exercises appropriate for a child who is afraid of throwing up and has just gone to the nurses office and several other situations.  Her book can be found at https://amzn.to/4jOI4W1 The movement exercises discussed in the podcast can be seen in at https://youtu.be/h2IxJNuzuDc

Claudia Gold, M.D. is a developmental pediatrician who has just published her fifth book Getting to Know You: Lessons in Early Relational Health From Infants and Caregivers. She has previously been on this podcast when we talked about her book The Developmental Science of Early Childhood (2017). Dr Gold discusses how early infant-caregiver relationship serve as a prototype for all the relationships that follow. She talks about the importance of just observing your infant and that relationships are always messy. As a pediatrician she is well versed in practical advice, however in this interview and in her book she talks about what do when nothing seems to work. She illustrates how taking a stance of "not knowing" can often help relationship heal and move on

Anna Scetinina, MACP, RP is a psychotherapist in Toronto, ON Canada who has just written A Workbook for Kids Who Worry: 50 Ways to Stand Up To Worry. She is also an award-winning professional artist whose pictures delightfully illustrate the ideas in the workbook She discusses how Acceptance and Commitment Therapy can be used to help anxious children. Her workbook will provide parents, children and therapist with a range of activities that will help children build the skills to tame anxiety.   

Heather White is the founder of OneGreenThing.org. She has spent over 20 years as a climate activist, including serving as presidential campaign staffer for Al Gore. She has published three books on climate change: One Green Thing: Discover Your Hidden Power to Help Save the Planet, Eco-Anxiety: Saving Our Sanity, Our Kids, and Our Future and 60 Days to a Greener Life: Ease Eco-anxiety Through Joyful Daily Action Heather provides an invitation to discover how you can participate in solving the most pressing issue of our time by exploring what your service "superpower" might be. Heather infuses an energy and optimism to the topic of climate changes that we all can take inspiration from. 

Lenka Glassman, PsyD has just published What To Do When You Panic: A Kid's Guide to Transforming Panic Into Personal Power She has also written a book for middle school children How to Master Your Mood in Middle School She is a clinical psychologist practicing in Bethesda MD and can be found at drlenkaglassman.com Her workbook fills a much needed gap in helping children with intense feelings that really take over. She delightfully engages her school age audience with using "magic tricks" to tame panic such "magic breathing", and  paradoxically doing the opposite of what "panic" wants. Parents will feel more confident handling tough moments after reading this book. 

Ellen Hendriksen, PhD has just published her second book, How To Be Enough: Self-Acceptance for Self-Critics and Perfectionists. I talked previously with Dr Hendrikson on this podcast on 1/30/2023 after she published her first book, How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety. In both podcasts, you will find her eloquent and deeply informative. In this podcast we talk about perfectionism and social anxiety. Her new book is fun to read and deeply informative on the topic of perfectionism. She describes the alarming increase in perfectionism and the 7 shifts that are needed to develop a more balanced life.  For more information about Dr Hendrikson https://www.ellenhendriksen.com/    

Climate change and the anxiety children may experience learning about it, is a challenging topic. Leslie Davenport is a climate psychology educator and therapist. She has just written What to Do When Climate Change Scares You: A Kid's Guide to Dealing with Climate Change Stress for ages 6-11. For tweens and up she had previously published All The Feelings Under the Sun: How To Deal Climate Change. In this podcast, Leslie Davenport explores some the complex issues around climate change, how we maintain hope in the face of some very serious facts, and how we can help children struggling with this issue.  For more information about Leslie Davenport https://lesliedavenport.com/