489: Shaping Character From Ages 6-10

Between ages 6 and 10, kids are learning big lessons about honesty, responsibility, and gratitude…and those moments don’t always feel peaceful. Today Karen and Emily are talking  about shaping character during these years. From handling bad attitudes and entitlement to teaching kids about truthfulness and contentment, they share practical ways to mold your child’s heart without losing your cool.Episode Recap:My 10 yr old pitches a fit when he has to do something he’s not prepared for (5:50)Life doesn’t always go the way we want it to go, that’s what builds character (10:50)My 6 yr old struggles with gratitude and contentment (11:30)My kiddo is a whiny complainer! Help (17:50)My niece recently stole a ring from my home and lied about it, my sister won’t address it!  (20:40)|Scripture: Proverbs 22:6 (NIV) Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.Discussion Questions: Why is it important to address small character issues early, instead of assuming kids will “grow out of them”?Do your kids struggle with gratitude and contentment? What did you think of Karen’s approach to dealing with that heart issue? What’s one area of character (honesty, gratitude, perseverance, responsibility) that you want to intentionally strengthen in your child this month?Resources:Use coupon code HBDK for 30% off a cozy Peace sweatshirt Raising Emotionally Strong Boys with David Thomas: https://amzn.to/4hkvDk9A Grown Up’s Guide to Kids’ Wiring: https://amzn.to/3J8ZTlq

From setting boundaries to tackling tough topics, today’s episode is all about navigating the hard parts of parenting with truth and grace. In this conversation, Karen shares practical wisdom for protecting your home, teaching empathy, and leaning on the Holy Spirit to do what only He can do, change hearts. Whether you’re navigating big emotions, sensitive subjects, or family boundaries, this conversation will help you parent with confidence and compassion.Episode Recap:My daughter’s friend is coming to live with us; what rules do we need to establish? (3:55)My daughter struggles with a judgmental heart, how can we help her? (5:15)My 8 year old son is asking questions about sex, help! (8:02)My SIL’s family has very different values from ours which makes visits stressful (11:45)Scripture: James 1:5 (NASB) “But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”Discussion Questions: Do you have “house rules”? If so, what principles guided those rules? How do you balance firm boundaries with a spirit of grace?How can we help our kids live out their convictions without becoming judgmental toward others who make different choices?Does the sex conversation feel intimidating to you? Is it time for a conversation in your home? If so, how can you approach it with honesty and calm?Karen mentioned the Holy Spirit’s role in transforming hearts; how can you rely on His guidance more in your day to day parenting?Is there a “hard talk” or situation in your home right now that you can approach differently after hearing this episode?Resources:Reach out to https://birdsonawiremoms.com/book-karen-to-speak to have Karen come speak in your community!Follow @birds_bees for tips about talking to your kids about sexGrab the God’s Design for Sex series on Amazon! https://amzn.to/43jefX5Join our private FB group, BOAW Moms: https://www.facebook.com/groups/BOAWmoms

How do you discipline your kids without damaging your relationship? Today Karen and Emily are talking about what it looks like to set boundaries, correct behavior, and still be your child’s safe place. From toddler tantrums to teenage independence, they share wisdom that will help you the next time you’re doling out discipline. Episode Recap:We’re afraid to discipline because we worry it will damage our relationship (4:52)My daughter confessed something small to me after YEARS (5:26)My child is hypersensitive to discipline from dad, what can I do? (7:39)My husband is too harsh with our teenage son (12:51)Our son doesn’t respect me the way he respects his dad (16:28)God commands us to discipline our children (21:17)Scripture: Proverbs 3:12 (NIV) “Because the Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.”Discussion Questions: What helps you stay calm when you need to discipline your child?Do you and your spouse have the same discipline style? Do your children respond differently to discipline from different parents? Emily talked about the notes Greg left her, which helped build up a base of connection. What’s one way you can affirm and encourage your child this week?What’s one tweak you need to make in your home this week to better balance discipline and relationship? Resources:Reach out to https://birdsonawiremoms.com/book-karen-to-speak to have Karen come speak in your community!Grab Karen’s lunch box notes to encourage your child: https://store.birdsonawiremoms.com/collections/gifts/products/lunch-box-notesJoin our private FB group, BOAW Moms: https://www.facebook.com/groups/BOAWmoms

Between toddler tantrums, potty training battles, and endless power struggles, the preschool years can feel like the wild west of parenting. Today Karen is answering your preschool questions with her trademark practical tips, reminding us that structure, consistency, and patience go a long way. Above all, your daily walk with the Lord is what will sustain you during these exhausting and beautiful years!Episode Recap:My husband and I are at our wit’s end with our strong-willed 4 year old’s tantrums (6:11)Take a deep dive into the temperaments to learn how to discipline your child (7:00)My husband’s job keeps him away from home often, how can I help my young children cope? (10:30)Help! Potty training is driving me nuts! (14:54)How do I help my 3 year old regulate his emotions? (17:40)Giving in to a tantrum makes it worse 100% of the time (19:00)Everything is an argument with my four year old, any advice? (23:22) Your walk with the Lord truly does make a difference (27:49)Scripture: Galatians 5:22–23“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”Discussion Questions:How do you usually respond when your preschooler throws a tantrum? Is it working? Is there a new strategy you could try this week?Karen shared the importance of structure. What does a typical day look like in your home, and how could a little more routine help your preschooler?When your spouse travels or works long hours (or if you are co-parenting and splitting time between parents), how can you help your kids feel connected to their parent who is away?Potty training can be one of the most frustrating seasons. What’s worked (or not worked) in your family, and how do you keep patience in the process?Karen reminded us that we need to lean on the Holy Spirit’s fruit to parent well. Which “fruit” do you most need to pray for in this season? Let’s pray for one another this week!Resources:We are booking for 2026! Reach out to bring Karen’s wisdom to the moms in your community: https://birdsonawiremoms.com/book-karen-to-speakLearn more about temperaments in our most recent episode with Kathleen Edelman: https://wiretalk.transistor.fm/episodes/470-why-your-child-s-wiring-mattersSend us your question! Use the Ask Karen function in the BOAW Moms app: App Store: https://apps.apple.com/md/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927 Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.subsplashconsulting.s_JVZ5JB&hl=en_US

What if a better marriage starts not with more work, but with changing the way you think? This week we’re sitting down with author and speaker Ted Lowe to talk about his book Us in Mind and the simple things that separate happy couples from struggling ones. From celebrating small wins to practicing empathy and taking thoughts captive, Ted unpacks practical ways to renew your mind and see your spouse differently. Whether your marriage feels stuck or just needs a little spark, we hope this conversation leaves you encouraged and equipped to do the next right thing.Episode Recap:How are great marriages different from struggling marriages? (6:42)Happy couples think in a way that unhappy couples don’t (8:42)“Madly in love” couples focus on what they do love about their spouse, not what they don’t (12:00)What you think about yourself affects how you interact with your spouse (17:08)Why do celebrations make such a big difference in our marriages? (25:12)Empathy is huge for happy marriages (30:01)Two words that changed Ted’s marriage (33:53) For Christians, our marriages are not just about us (38:44)Scripture: Romans 12:2 “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”Philippians 4:8 – “Whatever is true, whatever is noble… think about such things.”Discussion Questions:How does the way you think about your spouse shape the way you act toward them?Ted talked about “seeing the best” in your spouse. What does that look like in your marriage right now?Why is empathy so powerful in marriage? How could you practice “stepping into the puddle” with your spouse this week?How do you typically respond to your spouse’s successes or joys? What’s one way you can celebrate with them more intentionally?Which of Ted’s practical shifts (empathy, celebration, reframing thoughts, writing notes, pausing in conflict) feels most helpful for your current season of marriage?Marriage is meant to reflect the love of Christ. How does remembering this bigger purpose change the way you approach your relationship?Resources:Pick up a copy of Ted’s book today: https://amzn.to/4nKdkqDConnect with Ted: https://forusmarriage.com/Check out our Parenting Together curriculum for FREE in the BOAW Moms app: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927Download the companion study guide in the BOAW store: boaw.mom/parentingtogether 

When one mom asks a hard marriage question, we know hundreds more are wondering the same thing. Today, Karen and Emily tackle your vulnerable questions about jealousy, mismatched sex drives, and resentment at home. Karen reminds us that fighting for our marriages is worth it, even when it means doing the hard work like going to counseling, seeing a doctor, or having the tough conversation. We hope this episode will encourage you to keep investing in your marriage no matter the season you are in! Episode Recap:I struggle with jealousy when my husband is around other women, is that normal? (5:11)My husband doesn’t initiate sex, what should I do? (8:20)As a SAHM, I’m super frustrated with the home workload (10:34)Communicate when things are calm, not just in the heat of the moment (17:03)My husband and I disagree about SO MUCH - how do we compromise? (18:16)My spouse will NOT apologize. What are my options? (23:39)How do you stay connected when you’re outnumbered by kids & have busy schedules? (24:18) Scripture: Colossians 3:13–14 “Bear with each other and forgive one another… And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”Discussion Questions:What expectations do you carry into your marriage that you haven’t clearly communicated to your spouse?How do you and your husband currently handle disagreements? What could you do to practice more “active listening” with one another?When it comes to intimacy, how comfortable are you being honest about your needs? What might help you take a step toward open communication?What are some small, practical ways you and your spouse can prioritize your marriage this week?What regular rhythms/routines could you establish to make sure you prioritize your marriage even when life feels overwhelming?Resources:Check out our Parenting Together curriculum for FREE in the BOAW Moms app: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927Download the companion study guide in the BOAW store: boaw.mom/parentingtogether 

Marriage doesn’t have to feel heavy or complicated, sometimes we just need a gentle nudge to see where we’ve let things slide. In this conversation with Arlene Pellicane, author of Making Marriage Easier, Karen and Emily unpack the four practical shifts that can strengthen your relationship: play by the rules, speak kindly and listen well, practice gratitude, and take fun seriously. Whether you’re in the trenches with little ones or looking ahead to the golden years, this episode will encourage you to invest in your marriage today!Episode Recap:Arlene’s background and marriage (5:43)Ask yourself, what can I do to make my marriage easier? (7:59)What does it mean to “play by the rules” in marriage? (9:47)Divorce is highly predictable based on how couples speak to one another (11:05)How does giving thanks make marriage easier? (14:37)The source of our happiness is God, nothing else (17:36)Our phones are essentially a third person in modern marriages (18:15)Don’t forget to have FUN together! (21:57)In marriage, you will reap what you sow (26:21)Scripture: 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 (NIV)“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”Discussion Questions:What is one small step you could take this week to “make marriage easier”?How do you and your spouse communicate? Do you notice more admiration or criticism in your words?When was the last time you laughed/just had fun with your spouse? How could you plan something simple and enjoyable together soon?In what ways can practicing gratitude shift your perspective in marriage?How has phone or screen usage affected your relationship? What boundary might help protect your connection?What was most encouraging to you about this conversation? Resources:Snag Arlene’s book, Making Marriage Easier on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3KbFMD3Grab easy date night ideas (scroll down) at MakingMarriageEasier.comCheck out our Parenting Together curriculum for FREE in the BOAW Moms app: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927Download the companion study guide in the BOAW store: boaw.mom/parentingtogether 

Moms, you don’t want to miss this conversation! Karen and Greg pull back the curtain on nearly four decades of marriage—the good, the hard, the early years, and the season they’re in now. Their honesty will inspire you to invest in your own marriage now so you can reap the rewards later. This heartfelt episode will make you smile, and maybe even tear up, as they remind us that we serve a good and faithful God who wants the best for us and our marriages.Episode Recap:How Karen and Greg back met in 1984 (4:00)What Greg thought marriage was going to be like (6:40)What were some of your biggest differences as newlyweds? (7:50)How did you stay connected during the early years of raising kids? (10:09)We always prioritized us over the kids. (13:22)How did serving in the military impact your marriage and family? (14:45)What has been the hardest season of your marriage? (18:48)How did your faith carry you through that season? (22:54)What have you come to love or appreciate about one another more recently? (29:10)How has your relationship changed now that your kids are grown and gone? (31:35)What’s one way that you protect your marriage even now? (35:55)What has surprised you about becoming grandparents? (37:19)Lightening round questions (40:12)Scripture: Proverbs 3:5–6 (NIV)“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”Discussion Questions:Karen and Greg talked about prioritizing their marriage even while raising young kids. How do you currently make space for your spouse in a busy season of parenting?Greg shared the advice he received from his dad: “Your family is your hobby.” What might it look like for you to protect your margin for your family?Karen described her “needy gal” season where she learned to depend on God to meet her needs. How have you experienced God providing for you in a hard marriage or parenting season?What small rhythms (like a daily debrief, date nights, or intentional quiet time) could you adopt to strengthen your connection with your spouse?Looking ahead, what do you hope your marriage will look like when you reach the “high five” finish line of raising kids together?Resources:Get the Parenting Together curriculum videos FREE in the BOAW Moms app: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/birds-on-a-wire-moms/id1419899927Grab the discussion guide in our store: https://store.birdsonawiremoms.com/collections/mom-studies/products/parenting-together-free-in-the-app-copyReach out to https://birdsonawiremoms.com/book-karen-to-speak to have Karen come speak in your community!Join our private FB group, BOAW Moms: https://www.facebook.com/groups/BOAWmoms

No matter where your kids are in school this year, every mom will take away encouragement and wisdom from this conversation about homeschooling. In this episode, Karen and Emily sit down with Wire Talk producer (and homeschool mom of four) Katie Leipprandt, who shares the truths she’s learned over 15 years of parenting and schooling at home. From choosing relationship over results, to leaning on community, to remembering your “why” when days get hard, Katie’s wisdom applies to every mom—no matter how your kids are educated.Episode Recap:How did you get started homeschooling? (4:00)I wish someone had told me to prioritize relationship first (7:33)How has your ‘why’ changed for your homeschool? (11:30)What does a typical day look like homeschooling four kids? (14:30)How do you differentiate between your “mom hat” and your “teacher hat”? (18:00)What would you say to the homeschool mom who is already overwhelmed? (21:43)How do you teach a child who doesn’t want to do the work? (26:32)How do you juggle multiple ages and teach with toddlers? (32:24)What fruit have you seen because of homeschooling? (37:40)What’s your encouragement for the homeschool mom this year? (42:40)Scripture: Deuteronomy 6:6–7 (NIV) “These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”Discussion Questions:What is your “why” for the educational path you’ve chosen for your children? How can you remind yourself of it on hard days?Katie talked about prioritizing relationships over results. How does that idea challenge or encourage you in your current season?In the early years, expectations for homeschooling (and parenting in general!) can be sky-high. What expectations might you need to lay down to create more peace in your home?What role has community played in your parenting journey? How can you pursue encouragement and support if you’re feeling isolated?Katie shared that one of the sweetest fruits of homeschooling has been the bond between her children. What “fruit” do you see or hope to see in your family through the choices you’re making now?Resources:Connect with Katie online: www.instagram.com/leipprandt Dumbing Us Down by John Taylor Gatto: https://amzn.to/4fONcrKPurchase Birds on a Wire curricula in the store: https://store.birdsonawiremoms.com/collections/available-for-purchase-1Reach out to https://birdsonawiremoms.com/book-karen-to-speak to have Karen come speak in your community!Join our private FB group, BOAW Moms: https://www.facebook.com/groups/BOAWmoms

School today looks a lot different than when we were kids, and moms often feel stuck between supporting their children and not piling on more pressure. In this episode, Karen and Emily sit down with longtime educator and principal Jerome Huff to share how parents can help their kids thrive during their middle and high school years. We loved the reminder that your child’s school still needs you! Your prayers and presence can make a lasting impact, not only on your child but on the entire school community.Episode Recap:“Principal Coach” Jerome Huff joins us today to talk about helping our middle and high schoolers thrive (2:20)How coming from a single parent home influenced the way he ran his schools (5:45)How schools have changed over Jerome’s time as a principal (8:30) What do you wish more parents understood about what teachers are dealing with day to day? (16:30)High schools need parent volunteers as well! Ask, “what can I do?” (23:18)The role the Holy Spirit played in Jerome’s approach to being a principal (26:45)What are you most proud of from your career? (30:12)Scripture: Philippians 4:6–7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God…”Discussion Questions:1. How do you balance encouraging your child to do their best but not overwhelming them with pressure?2. Jerome mentioned the importance of letting kids advocate for themselves—what opportunities could you give your child this week to practice independence?3. Jerome emphasized the role of balance (school + outside interests) in thriving kids. How can you help your child find that healthy balance this year?4. What’s one way you can support teachers or administrators at your child’s school in a tangible way this semester?5. How can you begin praying more intentionally for your child’s school, teachers, and classmates?Resources:- Grab a pad of Lunchbox Notes to start your year off strong! https://store.birdsonawiremoms.com/collections/gifts/products/lunch-box-notes- Reach out to https://birdsonawiremoms.com/book-karen-to-speak to have Karen come speak in your community- Join our private FB group, BOAW Moms: https://www.facebook.com/groups/BOAWmoms