459. Coaching Hotline: When to Accept Reality & How to Handle Jealousy in Polyamory

Ever wonder if you are pushing toward a bold goal or just fighting reality and wearing yourself out? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener question about how to tell the difference between challenging limits and ignoring real constraints like your energy, time, and capacity. I also answer a question about jealousy in polyamory and what to do when you feel physically activated watching your partner show affection to someone else. I break down why the sensation in your body is created by your thoughts, not the situation itself, and why this is work you want to do before you are in the moment. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/459Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Do you feel like you are always falling short of some invisible standard, no matter how hard you try? That sense of inadequacy can creep into your work, your relationships, and how you relate to your body, and it can quietly run your life if you never stop to question it. In this episode, I explore why insecurity is not a personality flaw or something you need to fix, but a signal that you do not feel emotionally safe with yourself. I break down how socialization trains us to measure our worth against external rules and expectations that were never designed to serve us, and why that keeps us feeling perpetually not good enough. Hit play to learn how to stop outsourcing your sense of safety and value, and how to build emotional security from the inside. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/458 Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Does doing thought work make you calmer or does it turn you into someone who feels less emotional and more rigid? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener's question about whether becoming more logical means losing access to their emotions. You'll also hear my answer to a question from a listener who feels constantly angry during long school drop-off drives and blames other drivers. I'll show you how owning your choices and managing your mind can radically change how you feel without changing a single circumstance. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/457Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

My new book "Take Back Your Brain: How a Sexist Society Gets in Your Head... and How to Get it Out" is officially available as an audiobook and hardcover wherever books and audiobooks are sold! Click here to order yours: unfuckyourbrain.com/book

Ever notice how when someone asks you for something, you immediately feel like you should say yes? Whether it's a colleague wanting to pick your brain over coffee or your kid's school asking you to bake for the school fundraiser, there's this instant weight that settles on your shoulders. In this episode, I'm naming something that hasn't been talked about before but affects almost everyone socialized as a woman: Instant Obligation Syndrome.  I'll explain why this happens, how it's rooted in the socialization that teaches women their purpose is to serve others, and why you feel like you need a "good reason" to say no. Most importantly, I'll show you why this pattern is costing you far more than you realize.  Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/456 Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Why is it so easy to doubt ourselves, even when we’ve already proven we’re capable? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener's question about feeling unqualified despite a successful career. She’s struggling with thoughts that her associate's degree makes her less than others in her field, even though her work experience speaks for itself. The second question is about how to manage the flood of self-doubt that comes up when pursuing big goals. A coach is working on expanding her business, but finds herself stuck in a cycle of procrastination and negative thoughts. If you’ve ever felt like your thoughts were holding you back, this episode will help you move through them and take consistent action toward your goals. Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotline Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/455Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Confidence isn’t a magic spell, and it’s not something you’re born with.Over the course of one year working with me and other smart dynamic women, you will learn how to deploy the four skills of confidence – self-knowledge, self-compassion, self-belief and self-actualization – to create any outcome you want in your life.From the incredibly concrete (get promoted to VP) to the most ineffable (love myself more), these four skills will get you where you want to go.Join me for A Confident Life, January 12 – December 8, 2026.Click here to grab your spot or learn more: https://the-school-of-new-feminist-thought.captivate.fm/lifeMentioned in this episode:Are You Ready to Live A Confident Life?Join me for my brand new program, A Confident Life, January 12 – December 8, 2026. Over the course of a year working with me and other smart dynamic women, you will learn how to deploy the four skills of confidence to create any outcome you want in your life. Click here to learn more and sign up for A Confident Life!

Ever feel like you’re "too much" for others? Like when someone tells you you're too sensitive, too needy, or taking things too seriously?In this episode, I explore why the fear of being "too much" is so common among women and how it limits us from living fully. You'll discover why this vague but powerful fear gets weaponized against women and marginalized communities, and how to start rewiring your brain around it.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/454Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Do you ever find yourself paralyzed by the fear of making a mistake at work, no matter how small? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I’m answering two listener questions that dive into how we handle fear, stress, and the pressure to be perfect.The first question is from someone working in a high-stakes field, terrified of making mistakes and facing professional consequences. The second question is about dealing with stress-induced habits like overeating or drinking, and the guilt that follows. I show you why you can’t solve the problem by just focusing on behavior... it’s your thoughts and emotions that need attention.Submit your own question here and it might get answered on a future episode: unfuckyourbrain.com/coachinghotlineGet full show notes, transcript, and more information here: schoolofnewfeministthought.com/453Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

I’m hosting a free training to help you plan your dreams for 2026 and to teach you about the four skills you need to be confident you can reach any goal. I’ll also be sharing about our signature coaching program, A Confident Life which closes just a few days after this training. This call is happening on January 5th at 12pm Eastern. You’ll walk away with a clear goal for each of the six core areas of your life, and a road map to the skills you need to build, strengthen, or deploy to achieve them. Click here to sign up for your Dream Life Planning Call: https://the-school-of-new-feminist-thought.captivate.fm/dreamlifecallsMentioned in this episode:Let's Plan Your Most Audacious Goals for 2026!I’m hosting a free training to help you plan your dreams for 2026 and to teach you about the four skills you need to be confident you can reach any goal. This call will be happening on two dates: December 30th at 12pm Eastern January 5th at 12pm Eastern You’ll walk away with a clear goal for each of the six core areas of your life, and a road map to the skills you need to build, strengthen, or deploy to achieve them. Join us live for Your Dream 2026 Planning Call here