Ep 128 Continuously Improving Connection with Your Preteen with Marcus Aurelius Higgs

  What’s the only thing we all have the same amount of?  It’s the number of hours in our day.  We live in a culture that is focused on productivity, but David Buck, the author of The Time Optimized Life,  has a different perspective on time. He says we should be thinking about time optimization, not time management, and he bases his approach on lean thinking. I invited him to spend a little time with me at the Edges of Lean to share his insights.  Note: this conversation is especially important for people who are considering retirement or other major work transitions! David Buck David Buck is the author of The Time-Optimized Life and brings over 35 years of experience in organizational and time management to his work. Drawing from an affluent career in business development, where he worked with Fortune 500 companies and innovative small businesses, David developed a comprehensive understanding of business and began thinking about a life strategy that balances career with personal fulfillment.   Having led numerous teams, David understands the difference between productivity and mere busyness. He believes strongly that people in their late 40s and beyond should have the option to pursue fulfilling lives without compromising their career aspirations. As his first customer, David embodies his philosophy, showing his clients that they do not have to choose between a rewarding career and a satisfying personal life. Instead, he guides them in crafting a lifestyle that excites and sustains them, whether it involves full-time work, part-time engagement, or a purposeful retirement.     KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST:   00:04:45 The focus on retirement and life after work 00:08:40 The importance of human connections and meaningful activities in retirement 00:11:41 Defining one's purpose and guiding principles for using time 00:16:23 Negotiating unique employment structures for flexibility in retirement 00:19:54 Building relationship capital at work and personal life 00:23:20 Embracing diversity and continuous improvement in retirement planning 00:26:56 The challenge of transitioning to retirement and finding purpose 00:31:37 Sharing life stories and family histories as a productive activity KEY TAKEAWAYS: Time optimization emphasizes proactive planning for adaptable, effective scheduling. Optimizing time allows for prioritizing amid unexpected events. Defining life purpose is essential for a meaningful retirement transition. Planning diverse activities helps prevent monotony in retirement. Work-life flexibility, supported by relationship-building, allows responsiveness to personal needs. Relationship capital at work enables flexibility and smoother work-life transitions. Documenting life stories creates a lasting legacy for future generations. Lean principles applied to personal life improve time management with small changes.   Memorable Quotes From David Buck   "Practice patience, as meaningful things often take longer than expected; it allows you to learn, grow, and appreciate the journey." CONNECT WITH David Buck   Website: https://infinitylifestyledesign.com/tma/  Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/infinitylifestyle/    

  It’s election season in the United States, and it affects us all, no matter how involved we are in politics. Deep fractures run through our families, neighborhoods, and workplaces, affecting our ability to live and work with each other. Phyllis Leavitt’s new book, America in Therapy, directly addresses this problem and what we can do about it. She joined me at the Edges of Lean to talk about the intersections of political division and continuous improvement.    Phyllis Leavitt Phyllis Leavitt’s journey into psychology began long before her formal education. Growing up in a close-knit community, she was always drawn to helping others and understanding the complexities of human emotions. This passion led her to volunteer at local shelters and community centers during her teenage years, where she witnessed firsthand the profound impact of trauma and the power of compassionate support. Phyllis Leavitt graduated from Antioch University in 1989, earning a Master's in Psychology and Counseling. She co-directed Parents United, a sexual abuse treatment program in Santa Fe, New Mexico, until 1991, after which she dedicated herself to private practice full-time. Over the course of 34 years as a psychotherapist, Phyllis worked with children, families, couples, and individual adults, specializing in issues related to abuse and dysfunctional family dynamics, their consequences, and the essential components of healing. She is the author of two books, "A Light in the Darkness" and "Into the Fire." KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST: 00:01:44 Motivation for writing the book "America in Therapy" 00:06:00 The role of dysfunctional family dynamics in societal issues 00:11:48 Identifying and understanding symptoms of trauma and abuse 00:20:00 Bringing psychological principles to national conversations 00:26:10 Importance of seeing individuals, not labels 00:31:17 The need for deep listening and understanding of each other's stories 00:35:11 Introduction to Leavitt's book "America and Therapy" 00:39:04 Advice for young people: Find appropriate ways to contribute KEY TAKEAWAYS: Family dynamics and trauma influence behaviors across workplaces and society. Labeling people diminishes their humanity and escalates conflict. Sharing personal stories fosters empathy and bridges divides. Small acts of kindness can create a positive societal ripple effect. Dysfunctional family dynamics lead to symptomatic behaviors in individuals. Mass shootings may indicate broader societal dysfunction. Healing from abuse requires rebuilding bonds of compassion and care. Psychology provides tools for deep listening and conflict resolution. Safe spaces for dialogue are essential for sharing experiences. Individuals can promote positive change through kindness and advocacy.   Memorable Quotes From Phyllis Leavitt.   "Healing from trauma is not just about rebuilding oneself; it's about nurturing the bonds of compassion that connect us all." CONNECT WITH Phyllis Leavitt   Website:https://phyllisleavitt.com/  Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/phyllis-leavitt-630179255  X/Twitter: https://twitter.com/PhyllisLeavitt2  IG:https://www.instagram.com/pel2347/   

One of the things that frankly drives me crazy about how people think about continuous improvement is a focus on cost savings rather than increasing productivity and engagement< so I was excited to chat with Jonathan Vehar and Cathi Brese Doebler about a brilliant method to increase productivity, drive engagement and save money. They joined me to talk about their new book. “How to Make Meetings Not Suck”  Listen in and consider how their approach might enhance every meeting, from your daily morning huddle to those three-day leadership retreats.   Jonathan Vehar Jonathan Vehar is on a mission to make meetings better. With years of experience as a leader, executive, and facilitator, he knows what works and what does not. Known as an "innovation thought leader" by Fast Company, Jonathan takes a fresh but productive approach to improving "how teams collaborate". He has worked with top companies like Disney, Intel, NASA, and Pfizer, and his insights have been featured in Forbes, the Wall Street Journal, and Fast Company. Jonathan is also the co-author of six books on leadership, and his latest book, How to Make Meetings Not Suck, comes out in August 2024. Cathi Brese Doebler Cathi Brese Doebler brings over 25 years of experience in meeting facilitation, training, and leadership development. Cathi is passionate about helping others learn and grow. Cathi has been a Senior Consultant and Leadership Solutions Facilitator at the Center for Creative Leadership since 2013 and has worked with organizations like Fiserv and McBride & Lucius. She has also collaborated with several colleges, including the University of Buffalo and Erie Community College, blending her expertise in leadership with education. . KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST:   00:02:43 The importance of having fun at work 00:10:55 The purpose of having agendas for meetings 00:15:29 The cost of unproductive meetings 00:19:50 Calculating the financial cost of meetings 00:22:28 Suggestions for running effective meetings 00:25:14 The CIDR framework for meeting purposes 00:27:14 Differences between in-person and virtual meetings 00:32:19 Managing hybrid meetings effectively 00:33:14 How to connect with Jonathan and Kathy 00:34:02 Advice for young professionals starting their careers     KEY TAKEAWAYS:   Thoughtful planning and structure are essential for effective meetings, requiring a clear purpose and well-organized processes. Ineffective meetings are costly, with an average financial impact of $336,000 in one year. Virtual, in-person, and hybrid meetings present unique challenges, but we can manage them effectively with the right tools and techniques. The elements for successful meetings include a Power Agenda, defined roles, clear purpose (using the CIDR framework), and strong follow-through. The "Power Agenda" focuses on unique components like meeting duration, role assignments (e.g., scribe), processes, and desired outcomes to make meetings more efficient. The 3 Ps (Purpose, Process, Product) framework helps guide meetings to stay on track, ensuring clarity and respect for the time. Respecting time by preparing agendas in advance and assigning clear roles is a simple way to improve meeting effectiveness, countering the excuse of not having time for preparation. The CIDR framework (clear purpose, intentional design, defined roles, and respectful interaction) is crucial for making meetings productive and meaningful.     Memorable Quotes:   “Effective meetings don’t just happen — they require thoughtful planning, clear purpose, and respect for everyone’s time.” CONNECT WITH Jonathan Vehar:   Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jonathan-vehar/  Website: https://vehar.com/    CONNECT WITH Cathi Brese Doebler: Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cathi-brese-doebler-91884910/  Website: https://ditchthe.com/about/  Twitter: https://x.com/CathiDoebler     

Who are you when you are coaching?  How are you presenting yourself to your learner? How might your inner emotional state affect your coaching effectiveness?  Kelly Mallery coaches using the Toyota Improvement Kata and she joined me at the Edges of Lean to share some of her insights and what she has learned about the hidden side of coaching.     Kelly Mallery   Kelly Mallery serves as the Operational Excellence Manager for two Viant Medical sites while running her own coaching business, Kelly Mallery Coaching & Consulting LLC. She became part of Viant Medical in 2023, bringing her over 11 years of diverse manufacturing experience across industries such as solar, industrial consumer products, and aerospace. Throughout her career, Kelly has consistently focused on continuous improvement, and in the past five years, she has shifted her focus from practicing to coaching others. In 2020, she joined the Kata Girl Geeks, and by 2023, she founded Kata School Northeast, where she has established herself as a seasoned coach and 2nd coach. Kelly resides in the Upper Valley, situated between Vermont and New Hampshire, with her family. KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST:   00:01:06 Kelly's background and role in coaching 00:02:56 Integrating coaching practices into business operations 00:08:38 Developing self-awareness as a coach 00:11:08 Giving specific feedback to coaches 00:14:51 Bringing attention to a coach's emotional state 00:18:41 The impact of self-awareness on organizational culture 00:22:42 Creating trust and healthy conflict through self-awareness 00:28:22 Treating people as vehicles vs. human beings 00:29:27 Kelly's plans and coaching business 00:31:09 Advice for young professionals on self-awareness KEY TAKEAWAYS: Integrating coaching practices into business operations enhances organizational performance and effectiveness. Self-awareness is essential for coaches, allowing them to recognize their biases and emotional states, which can significantly influence the learner's experience. Developing emotional intelligence within organizations fosters trust and encourages healthy conflict, improving team dynamics and performance. Evolving from viewing individuals as mere tools for change to recognizing their humanity enriches the coaching approach. Integrating scientific thinking with emotional intelligence creates a holistic coaching practice that addresses both cognitive and emotional aspects of learning. Fostering self-awareness throughout an organization can lead to a more collaborative environment and enhance overall performance. Trust and healthy conflict are vital components of effective teamwork, and self-awareness is the key to cultivating these elements. Continuous personal and professional growth is crucial for coaches, emphasizing the need for ongoing development in self-awareness and coaching skills.   Memorable Quotes From Kelly Mallery.   "Trust and healthy conflict are vital components of effective teamwork, and self-awareness plays a key role in cultivating these elements." CONNECT WITH Kelly Mallery.   Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kelly-mallery-123b0628/    

We know that autonomy is one of the factors that leads to high employee satisfaction and that organizational alignment is required to achieve company goals. But how do you get both autonomy and alignment? Jurriaan Kamer believes that companies can achieve aligned autonomy, and there are specific actions leaders can take to reach this goal. He joined me at the Edges of Lean to share his experience and insights.   Jurriaan Kamer   Jurriaan Kamer is a Dutch expert in organizational change and co-founder of Unblock, a modern management consultancy. He is also a keynote speaker and the author of two influential books. His latest release, "Unblock: Clear the Way for Results and Develop a Thriving Organization," offers practical strategies for leaders to enhance ownership, speed up decision-making, and reduce bureaucracy for better outcomes. Previously, Jurriaan wrote "Formula X," a business novel inspired by Formula 1 racing, recognized by Forbes as a must-read for navigating an uncertain market. With over a decade of experience, he helps organizations eliminate ineffective strategies and foster high levels of autonomy. KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST:   00:02:20 Agile Principles vs. Practices 00:06:34 Organizational Culture and Scalability 00:09:38 Leadership Principles and Organizational Culture 00:12:40 Organizational Dysfunctions and Results 00:18:41 Formula One Behind the Scenes 00:21:25 Unblocking Organizational Challenges 00:24:15 Strategy as a Hypothesis 00:29:17 Control Needs in Leadership 00:32:09 Types of Decisions in Organizations 00:35:44 Teamwork and Psychological Safety 00:39:32 Thriving Organizations Through Lean KEY TAKEAWAYS: Autonomy and alignment are both important factors for organizational success. Aligned autonomy is the concept of having autonomous teams that work within the framework of the organization's objectives. Agile principles may not work effectively at the organizational scale, and it's important to explore other organizational theories and methods. The goal of organizations is to achieve results, whether financial, regulatory, or other objectives. Unblocking the organization involves identifying and overcoming organizational dysfunctions that hinder progress. Steering involves continuously setting goals, changing direction, and measuring progress. Meetings should be focused, purposeful, and used as a tool to drive work forward rather than being a distraction.   Memorable Quotes From  Jurriaan Kamer.   "Ownership is not something you can give to someone, it is something that people should take." CONNECT WITH Jurriaan Kamer.     Website:  http://www.unblockbook.net  Book Website: https://www.formula-x.co/  Linkedin :https://www.linkedin.com/in/jurriaankamer X/Twitter: https://x.com/jurriaankamer  IG:   https://www.instagram.com/jurriaankamer/   Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCG1WPfl4intvNQy5_5bVBcw   

A diverse organization is a competitive advantage –innovation and problem-solving thrive when people from diverse backgrounds work together. No matter who we are, when we move into that diverse environment, we all, no matter our race, carry baggage from racism in our culture.  JD Mass has written a book called “Race for What,” addressing the causes of racism and steps white folk can take to heal from the harm of racism and begin to connect as humans. He joined me at the Edges of Lean to share his insights.  JD Mass   JD Mass grew up in St. Louis, one of America’s most segregated cities, where his parents raised him in the black community. He worked closely with his childhood friend, Nelly, during the first four years of Nelly’s career, witnessing his rise to international fame. JD later joined a global community of black ex-patriots focused on health, peace, and sharing. Throughout these experiences, he saw the highest impact of racism and power structures. To better understand cultural development, JD earned a degree in organizational psychology. His journey is fueled by a desire to understand the roots of racism and promote a more humane, loving world.  KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST:   00:06:04 Defining culture and its impact 00:08:27 Exploring the roots of racism 00:19:54 Letting go to experience new possibilities 00:21:59 Experiencing a peaceful community in Israel 00:24:02 Applying cultural appreciation to lean implementations 00:29:20 Step 2: Acknowledging the harm of our culture 00:30:26 Step 3: Letting go of power, privilege, and fears 00:32:29 Step 4: Appreciating the value of other cultures 00:35:58 Step 5: Repairing and healing the harm 00:39:04 Step 6: Being led by a new mind 00:39:16 Closing thoughts and advice for young people KEY TAKEAWAYS: Reducing racism in company culture involves continuous improvement and active efforts to address biases. Diverse organizations gain a competitive edge through enhanced innovation and collaborative problem-solving. Racial biases impact interactions in diverse environments, regardless of personal intentions. The scarcity mentality, driven by limited resources, fosters competitive and discriminatory behaviors. Addressing racism requires a deep understanding of its historical and systemic origins and patterns. Perceptions of resource scarcity influence racial attitudes and contribute to competitive behaviors. Changing deeply ingrained cultural behaviors is challenging due to their entrenched nature.   Memorable Quotes From JD Mass.   “Addressing racism requires understanding and changing historical and systemic patterns.   CONNECT WITH JD Mass.   Website: https://raceforwhat.com/   Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jd-mass-psyd/   X/Twitter: https://x.com/JDMass1  IG: https://www.instagram.com/raceforwhat/        

As lean thinkers, we often look at life as a series of problems to be solved. I know I do this: I will be somewhere and see something that is working quite right, and I immediately think about the root cause of the issue and potential countermeasures to try. Do you do that, too? That is why I loved this conversation with Fletcher Ellingson, who talks about how to live a “feel good life,” building grace.  And wait till you hear what he says about our values do not mean jack!   Fletcher Ellingson. Fletcher is a speaker, coach, and author of the best-selling book The Practice of Feeling Good. Using a combination of science and psychology, he helps his clients break free from financial struggle, overwhelm, and persistent worry so they can spend more time doing what they love, contribute to their families, and impact their communities. Fletcher also hosts a regional weekly TV show, is a regular contributing columnist, and is a professional magician. He has helped hundreds of entrepreneurs and successful professionals embrace the principles of The Practice of Feeling Good. As a result, they have radically shifted their thinking and have been able to produce outstanding outcomes in their health, wealth, and relationships.             KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST:   00:01:22 - Roles and Mentorship 00:02:05 - Early Interest in Positive Thinking 00:02:46 - Influence of Early Experiences 00:04:50 - Discovering Magic and Its Impact 00:06:07 - The Joy of Performing Magic for Adults 00:07:04 - The Practice of Feeling Good 00:08:41 - Understanding and Influencing Emotions 00:09:12 - Feeling Good on Demand 00:12:27 - Empowering Stories and Their Impact 00:14:04 - Example of Empowering Stories in Daily Life 00:20:47 - Crafting Intentional Messages 00:22:13 - The Importance of Values in Lean Thinking 00:34:00 - Common Issues Clients Face 00:35:12 - The Overflow Effect on Relationships KEY TAKEAWAYS:   The practice of feeling good involves learning how to feel good on demand, which includes feeling safe, secure, connected, enthusiastic, and optimistic.  Shifting our thinking is essential for producing new and outstanding outcomes in our health, wealth, and relationships.  Creating empowering stories about our circumstances can lead to a more positive and fulfilling life.  Practicing gratitude and focusing on the positive can help us feel good and improve our well-being.  Upgrading our thinking and challenging our limiting beliefs can lead to breakthroughs and transformation in various areas of our lives.  Taking the time to define our standards and aligning our actions with them can lead to greater success and fulfillment.    Memorable Quotes From Fletcher Ellingson. "Get around the people who already have the results that you want.   CONNECT WITH Fletcher Ellingson.   Website: https://fletcherellingson.com/   X/Twitter: https://x.com/fletchellingson?lang=en Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/gocoachfletch/   

If you are a lean thinker, you are probably working to continually improve your skills in communicating with the adults in your life.  You may also be working to bring some lean thinking into your family life.  But what if you have some pre-teens in your family circle? They can be very challenging to work with – and that is where Marcus Higgs can help us.  He works with parents of pre-teens to help them improve their connection with the kids at a time when the kids are beginning to establish their unique identities.    Marcus Aurelius Higgs.   Marcus Aurelius Higgs works with Certain Future to support parents of pre-teens (10-14 y.o.), helping them show up and maintain meaningful relationships with their children during these 'identity-breaking' years. He collaborates with parents who want to be present with their son or daughter before it is too late to bridge the gap. Using 'The SHOW UP Framework,' Marcus helps parents benefit by ensuring they are confident in their communication when their tween starts having big emotions, knowing how to be present when their pre-teen starts to withdraw, so their child continues to trust them and naturally opens up difficult conversations, and understanding how to support their child in ways that develop self-belief and resilience.       KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST: 00:03:25 - Identity Breaking Phase 00:04:09 - Development of Friendships 00:05:12 - Coaching a Young Musician 00:10:12 - The Concept of "Not Yet" 00:12:42 - Pygmalion Effect on Parenting 00:13:22 - Common Issues Parents Face 00:16:01 - Show Up Framework Overview 00:22:37 - Opening Up Communication 00:24:44 - Establishing Regular Check-ins 00:29:21 - Personal Story of Support 00:32:30 - Challenges of Modern Parenting 00:34:26 - Social Media and Identity Formation   KEY TAKEAWAYS : Parents need to establish a strong identity and know their values and virtues. Parents should hold space for collaboration with their kids, working with them rather than doing things for them.  Written letters expressing pride and support can be a powerful tool for opening up communication with teens. Parents should seek support from a parent pod or a network of trusted adults to share the responsibility of parenting.  Social media can impact the sense of identity, and it is important to help children understand their worth beyond likes and virtual validation.  Memorable Quotes From Marcus Aurelius Higgs. "If you're a lean thinker, you're probably working to continually improve your skills of communicating with the adults in your life." CONNECT WITH Marcus Aurelius Higgs   Website: https://marcushiggs.com/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heartofmarcus/   

      You took the big plunge and started your own business.  Maybe you already have a customer or two.  But what comes next?  Jamaul Ford is a second-generation entrepreneur with some great ideas about what you already know about learning cycles for finding and connecting with customers. Let's listen to what he has to say. Jamaul Ford Jamaul Ford, or Jamaul the Maven, is an accomplished second-generation entrepreneur whose business journey goes beyond commercial success. His mission revolves around fostering growth, empathy, and community. With a strong belief in understanding and connecting with people, Jamaul's business approach centers on empowering others to succeed. He has successfully scaled diverse businesses, taking startups from zero to 10k and guiding enterprises to reach milestones of 100k and beyond. As a leader, he actively engages with his team, values learning from every experience, and advocates for open collaboration and collective growth.     KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST: 00:01:04 Second Generation Entrepreneurship 00:06:22 Finding Your Passion in Business. 00:10:45 Lean continuous improvement techniques. 00:12:04 Listening to customers for success. 00:18:34 Creative problem-solving in business. 00:21:29 Understanding client needs. 00:23:42 What qualifies as a lead. 00:31:17 Using GPT prompt for research.       KEY TAKEAWAYS  Transitioning into entrepreneurship is easier when you have a strong foundation and a passion for your work. When starting a business, focus on solving a problem or addressing a need that you resonate with.  Establish rapport and build relationships with potential clients before offering your services. Understand the needs of your target market to tailor your pitch and marketing efforts effectively. Use tools like adaptive intelligence and artificial intelligence to gather insights or refine your messaging.   Memorable Quotes From Jamaul Ford “Sometimes, people do not know what they need until you have shown them what they need.” CONNECT WITH Jamaul Ford    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jamaul-ford-3bb430194/  Twitter/X: https://x.com/JamaultheMaven   

    When I was first working, one of the early lessons imparted to me was that whatever happened at home was not pertinent to my work life.  That has been a difficult lesson for me to unlearn.  It was one of many limiting beliefs that I wasn’t even aware I was carrying into my lean and continuous improvement work. Jeeva Sam joined me at the Edges of Lean to share his insights into some of the limiting beliefs that hold us back and what we can do about them.  Jeeva Sam   Jeeva Sam is a seasoned pastor turned advisor and mentor specializing in helping individuals and couples navigate through challenges in their personal and professional lives. With over 35 years of experience as a pastor and has led numerous individuals to achieve personal and professional growth, Jeeva uses his spiritual background to guide clients toward self-awareness and relationship harmonization. Based in Canada, Jiva has a unique approach to counseling and mentorship that focuses on addressing limiting beliefs, fostering healthy mindsets, and enhancing communication skills. .   KEY TOPICS IN THIS PODCAST: 00:00:01 Getting to the Root Causes of Limiting Beliefs 00:05:57 Addressing Relational Stress to Improve Workplace Productivity 00:10:59 The Importance of Inner Work for Personal and Professional Success 00:16:29 Exploring Childhood Influences on Adult Behavior and Relationships 00:25:24 Reprogramming Beliefs Through Positive Affirmations and Supportive Company 00:28:49 The Importance of Coaches, Mentors, and Accountability Groups 00:30:08 Couples Masterminds and Gender-Specific Mentorship in Business 00:33:51 The Importance of Mentorship and Coaching for Young Entrepreneurs     KEY TAKEAWAYS  Identifying and addressing limiting beliefs is crucial for personal and professional development. Relational stress can significantly impact productivity and effectiveness in the workplace. Acknowledging the influence of childhood experiences on behavior is essential for self-awareness. Cultivating positive beliefs and affirmations can lead to a mindset shift and improved outcomes. Seeking mentorship and coaching early on can provide valuable insights and support for growth.   Memorable Quotes From Jeeva Sam “Replace unhealthy beliefs with positive affirmations to reprogram your mindset for success." "Surround yourself with individuals who uplift and challenge you to grow beyond your limitations."   CONNECT WITH Jeeva Sam     Website: https://thesams.ca/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeevasam/  Titter/X: https://x.com/jeevasam