Beyond Needs | Why satisfying Needs doesn't make us happy

Anyone who attempts to control themselves creates an internal split between the controller and the controlled. This inner struggle against one’s own nature leads to a paralysis of the will. This is a core tenet of the text I discuss by the charismatic spiritual teacher Alan Watts.You can find the text "Zen and the Problem of Control" here: https://archive.org/details/thisisitotheress00wattOther topics covered in this episode include:• Why the division of the self into a controlling entity and a controlled entity is bound to fail—both logically and practically.• Radical self-acceptance: Why genuine change only becomes possible when we stop fighting against our own nature.• Zen and *wu-wei*: The Taoist philosophy of effortless action and detachment, in which experiences are allowed to flow rather than being blocked.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]

J. Krishnamurti was an original thinker who combined psychology and spirituality in a way that inspired me 25 years ago, and still does to an extent. I am discussing a text from the book 'Freedom from the Known'. In it, Krishnamurti examines our desire for psychological security and control and asks whether true freedom is possible as long as we constantly cling to the known. He speaks about attention, and the possibility of a stillness of the mind that cannot be brought about by discipline, control, or pressure.Here are some recommendations for great dialogues he conducted:With Pupul Jayakar: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Mja_RM0xhAWith David Bohm: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvL4uNA4U-kFree introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]

Needs are important signals from our unconscious, yet consistently orienting ourselves around them causes fundamental problems. Needs manifest themselves immediately and concretely; they are easily misunderstood and foster a dependency on constant feedback from one’s own inner life.Greater freedom arises when we increasingly satisfy familiar needs through habits and principles. Yet the question remains whether our unconscious always knows what it truly wants—and this opens up a perspective on meaning, spirituality, and mysticism.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]

Trigger, Red Flags, Gaslighting, Resilience: Psychological terms are everywhere. Yet although we talk about mental health today more than ever before, sick days, exhaustion, and depression are reaching record levels. How can these two things be reconciled?When we use terms without understanding what they do to our minds, we allow ourselves to be shaped by societal narratives. Drawing on Hegel’s philosophy of the development of developing consciousness, I show why genuine therapeutic success requires a conscious examination and working-through of our own concepts—in order to end unconscious self-harm and achieve genuine self-knowledge.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]

Why do some people feel persistently empty despite success, relationships, or wealth? Because they don't actually know their true needs. I explain how our unconscious mind shapes our lives through hidden needs, why we can lose touch with them, and what consequences this has for our vitality, sense of direction, and overall life satisfaction. You'll also learn about a model of six fundamental core needs, along with practical exercises that will help you identify your own needs more clearly and fulfill them in healthier ways. Hopefully, this offers a fresh perspective on the human psyche.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minYoutube: https://youtu.be/r6vVhLvCCZ8Homepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]

Who are you really? True self-knowledge is more than self-optimization. That's why in this episode I discuss how you can uncover what lies hidden beneath habits, conditioning, and societal expectations. What needs drive your life? What emotional patterns repeat themselves? How do you treat yourself? What unconscious worldviews guide your decisions? The answers to these questions will help you piece together the puzzle of your identity.

What remains of the “I” when the not-self is stripped away? This episode explores practical paths to self-knowledge — from ascetic exercises, emotional control, and observation of thought to Neoplatonic and Gnostic methods aimed at uncovering the “pure spirit.” At the same time, it addresses the radical critique of Max Stirner, who sees in all these ideals merely new forms of subjugation.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected] by Vitaliy Shevchenko on Unsplash

I explore the concept of self-knowledge, tracing its roots from Socrates and Hegel to Buddhism. At the heart of this discussion is the question of which thoughts, feelings, and habits truly belong to our "I"—and which are merely external, learned patterns. I explain why change often only becomes possible when we detach our identity from certain emotions and core beliefs. Additionally, I examine the crucial difference between healthy inner freedom and mere emotional self-control.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]

We don't see the world; we only see our models of it. Gilbert Simondon's analogy of crystallization illustrates this: our thinking touches reality only at a razor-thin interface. Everything else is a construct, often even a hallucination, fueled by experience and emotion. In this episode, you'll learn how to update your "mental nutrient solution" and thus increase your life satisfaction.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]

Do you notice how negative self-talk undermines your self-esteem? In this video, I'll show you how important your self-awareness is—and how genuine self-empathy, instead of superficial affirmations, strengthens your mental foundation. We'll talk about self-criticism, meditation, therapy, and the path to a healthy inner dialogue.Free introductory consultation: https://calendly.com/gabriel-ellis/30minHomepage: https://www.gabriel-ellis.com/Email: [email protected]