E441 | Books I'm Reading and a Teaser from My New Book

In this more personal, laid-back episode, Brett gives you a few of his favorite recent reads, the Nerf guns he’s currently using to blast his son, the music he’s listening to right now, and a short teaser from his newest book, The Antihero Advantage. Sometimes it’s nice to just get a peek behind the curtain. This is one of those episodes you can throw on, roll the windows down, and enjoy—along with a few ideas, recommendations, and a first look at what’s coming in the new book. More sneak peeks from The Anti-Hero Advantage are coming soon. Until then, you can pre-order your copy at theantiheroadvantage.com or on Amazon.   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

There’s no shortage of information out there. If anything, we’re drowning in it. Wisdom is different. Wisdom is perspective you can actually use. It’s information that’s been distilled, reflected upon, screwed up a few times, revisited, and battle-tested in the real world. With about four months left in the year, I wanted to take stock of what I’ve learned, re-learned, and been reminded of throughout 2026. Some came from my own personal and professional experiences. Others came from conversations with clients and people we work with at Art of Coaching. None are meant to be earth-shattering. That’s kind of the point. In this episode, I get into: •⁠ ⁠Why you need to define what success actually means to YOU—and periodically revisit that definition. •⁠ ⁠Why knowing who you aren’t can sometimes be just as useful as knowing who you are. •⁠ ⁠What conflict tells you about the ceiling of a personal or professional relationship. •⁠ ⁠Why you shouldn’t expect the truth from someone who is lying to themselves. •⁠ ⁠The difference between what organizations say they value and what people are actually incentivized to protect. •⁠ ⁠Why old-fashioned things like handwritten notes, thoughtful messages, common courtesy, and simply giving a shit still matter. •⁠ ⁠Something I’ve been reminded of throughout the process of releasing my new book: people are often far more willing to help than we convince ourselves they are. There’s plenty of noise competing for your attention right now. My hope is that there are at least one or two things in here that make you stop, think, or look at something in your own life a little differently.   WHAT YOU’LL LEARN •⁠ ⁠How to separate your definition of success from everybody else’s. •⁠ ⁠Why self-awareness without conviction doesn’t get you very far. •⁠ ⁠What conflict, self-deception, and organizational politics can teach you about dealing with people. •⁠ ⁠Why some of the simplest habits still have an outsized impact on relationships and reputation.   PRE-ORDER HERE NOW! https://theantiheroadvantage.com/   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

In this follow-up episode, Brett doubles down on why being liked isn’t a prerequisite for effective leadership, while also exploring where the limits of that advice begin to show. Using a real-world case study of a high-performing professional who believes they were fired due to not being liked, and another client who thinks they were passed over for a promotion because they weren’t perceived as likable, Brett examines the more complex relationship between likability, competence, power, and leverage. He breaks down why doing great work isn’t always enough to protect you, how easily people can misread the political dynamics operating around them, and why your ability to withstand interpersonal friction often depends on how difficult you are to replace. The episode also explores research on why people sometimes prefer a likable colleague over a more competent one, when that preference flips, and why understanding who holds power—and what leverage you actually have—is essential to navigating any organization. The goal isn’t to become more agreeable or start chasing approval. It’s to understand the context you’re operating in well enough to know whose opinion matters, what makes you valuable, where your leverage comes from, and when being disliked can actually cost you. For more like this, pre-order Brett’s new book, The Antihero Advantage, now to learn more practical strategies for navigating power dynamics, communicating with different personalities, and making a bigger impact without relying on the tired leadership formulas that rarely survive contact with the real world.   PRE-ORDER HERE NOW! https://theantiheroadvantage.com/   For reference, see these previous episodes mentioned in this episode: •⁠ ⁠ Episode 214 of The Art of Coaching Podcast, “Why Great Leaders Shouldn’t Worry About Being Liked”: https://artofcoaching.com/e214/ •⁠ ⁠ Episode 438, “You Don’t Have to Be Liked: The Power of Not Being for Everyone” with Nathalia Melo: https://artofcoaching.com/e438/   WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE: •⁠  ⁠How to audit how much leverage you actually have •⁠  ⁠Why being great at your job may not be enough •⁠ ⁠ How to tell if your relationships are helping or hurting your career •⁠ ⁠ Ways to spot power dynamics you may be missing   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

My guest this episode is Nathalia Melo, a globally recognized fitness and performance coach, former Olympia champion, and Harvard Medical School Certified Wellness Coach. Nathalia is a globally recognized fitness and performance coach with over 17 years of experience helping high-performing women build bodies that support the level at which they operate in their careers and lives. A former Olympia champion and Harvard Medical School Certified Wellness Coach, Nathalia has spoken in over 30 countries, presented for Fortune 500 companies and AM100 law firms, and been featured in magazines worldwide. Today, she leads a multidisciplinary coaching practice that integrates training, nutrition, behavioral psychology, and lifestyle strategy to help busy professionals improve their physical capacity, energy, and long-term health. Through her Powerhouse coaching programs, Nathalia and her team, which includes Registered Dietitians and Licensed Counselors, have helped more than 5,000 women navigate the challenges of maintaining their health while leading demanding careers and families. Her work focuses on a population often overlooked in traditional wellness conversations: high-achieving women who understand health intellectually but struggle to apply it consistently within the realities of leadership, long hours, and high responsibility. Her mission is to help women operate at the highest level without sacrificing the health and physical capacity that makes sustained success possible. In this episode, Brett and Nathalia talk about how critical it is to be deliberate in all the things you do, but also to quit worrying about being liked. They talk about how, especially in today's performative culture where people are so worried about seeking validation, it will often derail you personally and professionally.   The conversation spans: -Professional development -Nathalia's backstory -Navigating conflict with your partner -Understanding how to better interact with your children -Figuring out and owning your real voice without constantly backtracking or seeking approval   You'll get things you can use immediately and then build off of that.   Find Nathalia: Website: nathaliamelofit.com Podcast: Unfiltered Fit Life (Apple, Spotify) Instagram: @nathaliamelofit YouTube: @natmelofit   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

We’ve all done it. There’s a conversation we need to have—whether it’s making a request, delivering difficult news, sharing information, repairing a relationship, or even giving a speech or presentation. Yet before we ever say a word, we convince ourselves it’s going to go far worse than it probably will. We think we’re going to annoy somebody, bother somebody, ruin a relationship, lose an opportunity, or otherwise be viewed in a negative light. In this episode, we’ll explore some of the scientific principles behind why we do this. We’ll discuss why we have a negativity bias, why we tend to keep things to ourselves, why we avoid conflict, and why we’re so quick to assume people are going to disrespect us, deny us opportunities, misread our intentions, or see us differently than they actually do. We’ll also talk about first principles and practical strategies you can use to continue showing up in a way that’s genuine to you—without getting caught in a doom loop of overthinking that ultimately costs you opportunities or makes situations worse than they ever needed to be. For more on these topics, check out my new book, The Anti-Hero Advantage. It’s literally written to help people navigate hard conversations, conflict, self-doubt, and learn how to channel these challenges into strengths so they can become more effective and adaptable in any relationship—personal or professional. Published by Portfolio/Penguin Random House, it’s the most meaningful work I’ve ever done. Pre-order your copy today at TheAntiHeroAdvantage.com or on Amazon. And yes, I’ll be narrating the audiobook myself.   WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:   •⁠ ⁠ Why your brain creates worst-case scenarios •⁠  ⁠How to better manage the narrative in our minds •⁠  ⁠How to avoid catastrophizing •⁠ ⁠ Why we avoid difficult conversations •⁠ ⁠ A simple framework to stop making monsters out of moments   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

In this episode, Brett talks about the importance of taking a first step — and not in some kind of cheesy way, but in a way that applies regardless of whether you're trying to write a book, whether you want to start a new job, whether you're beginning a new relationship. Whatever road you're taking, and no matter how daunting it seems before you, you've got to take that first step. This dives into why we often overthink, why we often overprepare, and how that can actually keep us stuck; and why it's important to just get the metaphorical shitty rough draft out there.  By taking action and being willing to take the risk, look foolish, fail a little bit, yet tweak it as we go — that is always when we're going to be able to make the most progress. So many motivational episodes are going to give you some kind of framework or something else. This just tells you what you already know, but perhaps in a clear way: you need to get started now, in the simplest way possible, because the sooner you do that, the more you're going to be able to tweak and refine and adapt as you go. And progress always favors the bold and those who don't procrastinate. For more tips on how to overcome your own internal doubts and demons — whether that's perfectionism, overthinking, or imposter phenomenon — check out Brett's latest book, The Antihero Advantage, now available for preorder at theantiheroadvantage.com.   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

After years of research, writing, rewriting, and countless conversations with leaders, coaches, entrepreneurs, and professionals across industries, The Antihero Advantage is finally here. In this special episode, I share why I felt compelled to write this book, the ideas that shaped it, and what you can expect if you decide to read it. We talk about the limitations of the traditional “hero” narrative, why adaptability and social agility matter more than ever, and how understanding human behavior can help you lead, communicate, and navigate complexity more effectively. Whether you’ve been following this project from the beginning or are just hearing about it for the first time, I hope this episode provides a helpful introduction to the thinking behind The Antihero Advantage. In this episode, we discuss: •⁠ ⁠Why I wrote The Antihero Advantage •⁠ ⁠The core ideas and themes behind the book •⁠ ⁠Who this book is for—and who it isn’t •⁠ ⁠Using your dark side for good •⁠ ⁠What I hope readers take away from it If The Antihero Advantage resonates with you, I’d be grateful if you’d consider picking up a copy and leaving a review. Your support helps more than you know, and it helps these ideas reach more people. Learn More At: https://theantiheroadvantage.com Thank you, as always, for listening and for being part of this community.   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

We're all going to navigate a great deal throughout our careers, and it can be really hard to know whether you’re on the right track or doing the right things. Nobody is going to have a surefire guide that will guarantee you're gonna succeed, but there are certain principles that can make your road a lot less turbulent and potentially a lot more fruitful. This is why I laid out the 10 Career Commandments, not because I've had it figured out from day one, not because I have the perfect career. This actually came from a slide or a presentation that I gave in New Orleans. I was asked, "Hey, what advice do you have for young coaches or old coaches alike in your career? Hell, what do you have for people in general in their career?" What I wanted to come up with was 10 timeless truths: things that aren't mind-blowing, but I think are critical if you want to maintain great relationships, avoid getting lost in the weeds, and not start letting different things distract you. I wanted to give it to you in this snappy, quick episode that I think will provide value for years to come. This is that list.   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

Many of us have had moments where we feel like we should want more, when really we want something simple and straightforward. It creates a kind of cognitive dissonance. We want to make an impact. We want to do something people remember us for. And at the same time, the idea of a steady paycheck and not a lot to worry about sounds really nice.  We don't want to lose sleep staring at the fan all night, wondering if we're going to be able to pay the bills, wondering if we're ever going to get out of debt. But we keep wrestling with the other side of us — the one that says you have to make a bigger difference, you can't leave anything on the table, you only get one shot at this. This episode is a case study that unpacks exactly that. We get into an individual who was wrestling with himself, stuck in a shame loop he felt like he was never going to get out of. You're going to love this one. For more on this: Pick up more on the ideas behind this episode at theantiheroadvantage.com. For other resources, or for one-to-one mentoring on how to work through the things you feel are holding you back, go to artofcoaching.com/mentoring or email us at [email protected].   WHAT YOU’LL LEARN: -How to understand if it's shame, overthinking, or fear that's holding you back -Why wanting security can sometimes feel like you're failing -How to stop chasing what seems like the perfect option and find one you can actually live with -The questions to ask yourself to see if you're playing it safe for the wrong reasons     Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

Steven Pressfield is the bestselling author of titles such as Gates of Fire, Tides of War, and The Legend of Bagger Vance. He's also written numerous nonfiction books, such as The War of Art and Turning Pro. Collectively, his books have sold millions of copies and been translated into countless languages; Gates of Fire, in particular, is required reading at West Point and Annapolis and has been on the U.S. Marine Corps Commandant's Reading List for all ranks since 2002. But what I love about him is that he's incredibly open. He wrote for 27 years before he got his first novel published, and during that time, he worked 21 different jobs in 11 states. He taught school, drove tractor-trailers, worked in advertising and as a screenwriter in Hollywood, worked on offshore oil rigs, picked fruit as a migrant worker — you name it. His newest book is a novel called The Arcadian, and that's what we're getting into today. We're discussing the genesis of the book and how it maps onto many of the personal struggles we all overcome in our day-to-day lives, both as leaders and individuals. We also touch on a few topics that he's never really been asked before, as it pertains to his writing and why he can sometimes bounce in and out of writing both fiction and non-fiction. Regardless of your profession, you'll find something relatable here. He has a wonderful perspective and is a tremendous writer.   WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE: -Why fiction can be more effective at exploring deeper human truths than nonfiction when it comes to psychology, conflict, and motivation. -How great stories are effective because they keep the reader moving by planting breadcrumbs, small hints, and bits of information along the way. -How to improve your writing by honing your voice, finding the right voice for the project, and using a clear structure with recurring symbols and threads. -The things that still keep Steven curious and learning including the creative process, the Muse, and the idea that stories come from another dimension. -How he balances research with storytelling by grounding the reader in real details while still keeping the ideas organized and understandable   Follow Steven: https://www.instagram.com/steven_pressfield/?hl=en https://stevenpressfield.com/   Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb