E394 | Dr. Nick Holton & Dr. Adam Wright | Anti-Fragility: Thriving Amidst Unpleasantness

In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Adam Wright and Dr. Nick Holton for a wide-ranging conversation on anti-fragility—the ability not just to endure difficulty, but to grow stronger because of it.   We go beyond the philosophical jargon and buzzwords and get into what anti-fragility actually looks like in real life, whether you’re leading athletes, running an organization, or just trying to manage your own day-to-day stress.   We talk about: •What anti-fragility really means (not just resilience or grit). •How exposure to unpleasantness is essential—not optional—for growth. •Ways to practically use setbacks, stressors, and challenges as catalysts. •Why chasing happiness is less effective than learning to thrive amidst discomfort.   If you’ve ever wondered how to turn adversity into an advantage without romanticizing it or oversimplifying it, this episode will cut through the fluff and give you something you can actually apply. 🎤 Art of Coaching Live Events Let’s be honest—most workshops leave you with a notebook full of tips and no real plan for change. Ours are built different. At Art of Coaching, you won’t just sit and take notes. You’ll engage in real scenarios—role-plays, peer feedback, video breakdowns, and live evaluations—designed to help you sharpen your communication, think on your feet, and handle tough conversations with more clarity and control. Whether you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive coworker, trying to be more assertive without burning bridges, stuck in tension at home, or just tired of second-guessing yourself socially or professionally—we can help. This is potent personal and professional development that actually sticks. No fluff. No filler. We offer multiple pricing tiers and discounts—reach out at [email protected] and we’ll help make it work for you. Upcoming Workshops: 📍 Phoenix, AZ – Oct 11‑12  (Speaker School™) 📍 Murfreesboro, TN – Oct 25‑26  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Charlestown, MA – Nov 15‑16  (The Apprenticeship™) 🔗 artofcoaching.com/events Real Coaching for Real Life Let’s be honest—everyone says they want growth, but putting in the work? That’s where most people just stick to what’s comfortable.. That’s why we created a mentoring service built for the real world. Whether you’re stuck on a professional decision, starting a business, writing a book, dealing with pressure at home, or just trying to get out of your own way—we can help. This isn’t therapy. And it’s not a rah-rah, feel-good session either. It’s direct, tailored coaching from people who’ve been in the trenches—leaders, operators, educators, business owners. Our team of 15 comes from a wide range of backgrounds, so you’re matched with someone who understands your world and knows how to push you forward. Everyone needs a coach. We’re here when you’re ready. 🔗 artofcoaching.com/mentoring Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

We’ve all met somebody—and been there ourselves—where no matter how much success you’ve had, you still feel like you’re about to get found out. Like it’s not enough. Like eventually the mask slips.   This episode gets to the core of that feeling, builds off our previous episode on imposter phenomenon, and most importantly gives you tools to get out of your own head so you can quit playing small. The goal: to stop letting that internal echo drive you toward self-sabotage, avoidance, or holding back when you know you’ve got more to give.   Inside, you’ll learn: •What’s actually at the root of imposter syndrome (and why success doesn’t cure it). •Practical ways to interrupt the self-doubt loop before it derails you. •How to reframe your achievements so they fuel you instead of haunt you. •Simple strategies to build confidence through action, not overthinking.   If you’ve ever felt like you’re capable of more but stuck in your own head, this one’s for you. 🎤 Art of Coaching Live Events Let’s be honest—most workshops leave you with a notebook full of tips and no real plan for change. Ours are built different. At Art of Coaching, you won’t just sit and take notes. You’ll engage in real scenarios—role-plays, peer feedback, video breakdowns, and live evaluations—designed to help you sharpen your communication, think on your feet, and handle tough conversations with more clarity and control. Whether you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive coworker, trying to be more assertive without burning bridges, stuck in tension at home, or just tired of second-guessing yourself socially or professionally—we can help. This is potent personal and professional development that actually sticks. No fluff. No filler. We offer multiple pricing tiers and discounts—reach out at [email protected] and we’ll help make it work for you. Upcoming Workshops: 📍 Phoenix, AZ – Oct 11‑12  (Speaker School™) 📍 Murfreesboro, TN – Oct 25‑26  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Charlestown, MA – Nov 15‑16  (The Apprenticeship™) 🔗 artofcoaching.com/events Real Coaching for Real Life Let’s be honest—everyone says they want growth, but putting in the work? That’s where most people just stick to what’s comfortable.. That’s why we created a mentoring service built for the real world. Whether you’re stuck on a professional decision, starting a business, writing a book, dealing with pressure at home, or just trying to get out of your own way—we can help. This isn’t therapy. And it’s not a rah-rah, feel-good session either. It’s direct, tailored coaching from people who’ve been in the trenches—leaders, operators, educators, business owners. Our team of 15 comes from a wide range of backgrounds, so you’re matched with someone who understands your world and knows how to push you forward. Everyone needs a coach. We’re here when you’re ready. 🔗 artofcoaching.com/mentoring Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

We’ve all been stuck in conversations that feel like hostage situations. This isn’t about passionate people with good stories — it’s about the chronic monologuers, the one-uppers, and the human foghorns who think “conversation” means “your turn to listen to me, and now your soul is mine.”  In this episode, you’ll get five tactical ways to keep your sanity, stay engaged enough to be polite, and maybe even turn things around. Whether you’re dealing with a talker at work, a relative who never comes up for air, or a stranger who traps you at a party, these strategies will help you handle it without burning bridges — or your patience. 🎤 Art of Coaching Live Events Let’s be honest—most workshops leave you with a notebook full of tips and no real plan for change. Ours are built different. At Art of Coaching, you won’t just sit and take notes. You’ll engage in real scenarios—role-plays, peer feedback, video breakdowns, and live evaluations—designed to help you sharpen your communication, think on your feet, and handle tough conversations with more clarity and control. Whether you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive coworker, trying to be more assertive without burning bridges, stuck in tension at home, or just tired of second-guessing yourself socially or professionally—we can help. This is potent personal and professional development that actually sticks. No fluff. No filler. We offer multiple pricing tiers and discounts—reach out at [email protected] and we’ll help make it work for you. Upcoming Workshops: 📍 Phoenix, AZ – Oct 11‑12  (Speaker School™) 📍 Murfreesboro, TN – Oct 25‑26  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Charlestown, MA – Nov 15‑16  (The Apprenticeship™) 🔗 artofcoaching.com/events Real Coaching for Real Life Let’s be honest—everyone says they want growth, but putting in the work? That’s where most people just stick to what’s comfortable.. That’s why we created a mentoring service built for the real world. Whether you’re stuck on a professional decision, starting a business, writing a book, dealing with pressure at home, or just trying to get out of your own way—we can help. This isn’t therapy. And it’s not a rah-rah, feel-good session either. It’s direct, tailored coaching from people who’ve been in the trenches—leaders, operators, educators, business owners. Our team of 15 comes from a wide range of backgrounds, so you’re matched with someone who understands your world and knows how to push you forward. Everyone needs a coach. We’re here when you’re ready. 🔗 artofcoaching.com/mentoring Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

There’s a lot of noise out there telling you that if you’re not jumping out of bed every morning with boundless energy, something’s wrong with you.  That’s false. Low-energy days aren’t proof you’re broken — they’re part of being human.  In this episode, we’ll talk about why those days happen, how to stop shaming yourself for them, and simple, low-effort ways to make the day suck less without pretending everything’s perfect.  You’ll learn how to give yourself grace without slipping into complacency, and how to keep moving forward even when you don’t have your best stuff. 🎤 Art of Coaching Live Events Let’s be honest—most workshops leave you with a notebook full of tips and no real plan for change. Ours are built different. At Art of Coaching, you won’t just sit and take notes. You’ll engage in real scenarios—role-plays, peer feedback, video breakdowns, and live evaluations—designed to help you sharpen your communication, think on your feet, and handle tough conversations with more clarity and control. Whether you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive coworker, trying to be more assertive without burning bridges, stuck in tension at home, or just tired of second-guessing yourself socially or professionally—we can help. This is potent personal and professional development that actually sticks. No fluff. No filler. We offer multiple pricing tiers and discounts—reach out at [email protected] and we’ll help make it work for you. Upcoming Workshops: 📍 Phoenix, AZ – Oct 11‑12  (Speaker School™) 📍 Murfreesboro, TN – Oct 25‑26  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Charlestown, MA – Nov 15‑16  (The Apprenticeship™) 🔗 artofcoaching.com/events Real Coaching for Real Life Let’s be honest—everyone says they want growth, but putting in the work? That’s where most people just stick to what’s comfortable.. That’s why we created a mentoring service built for the real world. Whether you’re stuck on a professional decision, starting a business, writing a book, dealing with pressure at home, or just trying to get out of your own way—we can help. This isn’t therapy. And it’s not a rah-rah, feel-good session either. It’s direct, tailored coaching from people who’ve been in the trenches—leaders, operators, educators, business owners. Our team of 15 comes from a wide range of backgrounds, so you’re matched with someone who understands your world and knows how to push you forward. Everyone needs a coach. We’re here when you’re ready. 🔗 artofcoaching.com/mentoring Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

When most people think about persuasion, they go straight to education (“if they just understood, they’d agree”), inspiration (“let me tell you an inspiring story”), or force (“do this now”).  But there’s a big difference between persuasion, influence, power, and warmth — and understanding that difference can change how you get things done.  This episode, inspired by a fable I read to my son, breaks down why subtlety often beats force, how warmth can shift behavior faster than pressure, and what that means in real-world situations.  Whether you’re a manager trying to get buy-in, a coach pushing for compliance, or anyone who needs to move people from point A to point B, you’ll get practical takeaways you can use immediately. Don’t forget: You’re never going to get better at dealing with challenging personalities—or improving your own communication—unless you actually come practice it in a hands-on setting. Check out one of our live, immersive workshops at: www.artofcoaching.com/events Upcoming Workshops: 📍 Phoenix, AZ – Oct 11‑12  (Speaker School™) 📍 Murfreesboro, TN – Oct 25‑26  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Charlestown, MA – Nov 15‑16  (The Apprenticeship™) And to stay sharp, subscribe to our newsletter at: www.artofcoaching.com/begin Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

These days, it feels like everyone is calling someone a narcissist. Ex-partner? Narcissist. Difficult boss? Narcissist. Confident stranger on Instagram? Must be a narcissist. The term has been thrown around so loosely that it’s lost its meaning—and worse, it’s become a lazy way to avoid reflection or real understanding. In this episode, we cut through the noise and get to the core of what narcissism really is—and what it isn’t. You’ll learn: Why narcissism exists on a spectrum—and why we all have narcissistic traits The difference between clinical, subclinical, and just human behavior The 4 distinct types of narcissism you’ll likely encounter in life or work How narcissistic traits show up in covert, communal, and even “insecure” ways Tactical ways to respond to each type—without losing your mind Why spotting narcissism in yourself isn’t something to fear—but something to work with If you’ve ever struggled to deal with someone manipulative, overly self-focused, or exhausting to be around… Or if you’ve ever wondered “wait… am I the problem?”—this one’s for you. Don’t forget: You’re never going to get better at dealing with challenging personalities—or improving your own communication—unless you actually come practice it in a hands-on setting. Check out one of our live, immersive workshops at: www.artofcoaching.com/events And to stay sharp, subscribe to our newsletter at: www.artofcoaching.com/begin Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

Have you ever gotten a negative review on something you've made or your business? Received a one-star rating? Dared to venture into the comment section—or worse—overheard someone trashing your work? It’s a law of the universe: haters are inevitable the moment you take a stance, make yourself visible, or grow in ways that challenge others' comfort or self image. In reality, most hate isn’t really about you. It’s what you represent. You’re the one who took the risk. You’re being seen.  You’re being recognized. And that shakes the stands they’re still sitting in—watching, critiquing, but never stepping foot in the arena themselves. This episode will help you separate noise from feedback, ugliness from something worth reflecting on, and how to tell when criticism should be used as locker room motivation—or ignored entirely. In today’s show, Brett will address this long overdue and fascinating case study in human nature, and cover: The deeper reasons people lash out—and what it has to do with power and control Why some criticism feels louder than it is—and how it spreads through social currency How to filter what deserves reflection vs what’s just emotional noise When to use negativity as fuel—and when to let it die in silence Why consistency outlasts every critic—and what happens when you fade with them If you’ve ever found yourself doubting what you’re doing because of someone’s throwaway comment... Or if you’ve ever wondered whether to clap back, make adjustments, or just put your head down and move forward—this one’s for you. Whether you love the episode or hate it (see what we did there), we love hearing from you. If you have any questions you’d like answered or want to hear more about a certain topic, shoot us an email at [email protected].    🎤 Art of Coaching Live Events Let’s be honest—most workshops leave you with a notebook full of tips and no real plan for change. Ours are built different. At Art of Coaching, you won’t just sit and take notes. You’ll engage in real scenarios—role-plays, peer feedback, video breakdowns, and live evaluations—designed to help you sharpen your communication, think on your feet, and handle tough conversations with more clarity and control. Whether you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive coworker, trying to be more assertive without burning bridges, stuck in tension at home, or just tired of second-guessing yourself socially or professionally—we can help. This is potent personal and professional development that actually sticks. No fluff. No filler. We offer multiple pricing tiers and discounts—reach out at [email protected] and we’ll help make it work for you. Upcoming Workshops: 📍 Melbourne, AU – Aug 23‑24  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Phoenix, AZ – Oct 11‑12  (Speaker School™) 📍 Murfreesboro, TN – Oct 25‑26  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Charlestown, MA – Nov 15‑16  (The Apprenticeship™) 🔗 artofcoaching.com/events Real Coaching for Real Life Let’s be honest—everyone says they want growth, but putting in the work? That’s where most people just stick to what’s comfortable.. That’s why we created a mentoring service built for the real world. Whether you’re stuck on a professional decision, starting a business, writing a book, dealing with pressure at home, or just trying to get out of your own way—we can help. This isn’t therapy. And it’s not a rah-rah, feel-good session either. It’s direct, tailored coaching from people who’ve been in the trenches—leaders, operators, educators, business owners. Our team of 15 comes from a wide range of backgrounds, so you’re matched with someone who understands your world and knows how to push you forward. Everyone needs a coach. We’re here when you’re ready. 🔗 artofcoaching.com/mentoring Related Episodes: E387 | How to Deal With Defensive People Who Project Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

Wait... when did this become my fault? Why do I feel like I’m being indicted?  That’s not at all what I meant when I said that.  I have no idea how we got to the point where I’m the one feeling guilty. We’ve all been in this situation before. You thought you were having an honest conversation—but somehow, things flipped. Now it’s uncomfortable. You must have said something that offended them… right?  But did you?  How did what you said get twisted into that? And now, out of nowhere, you’re the bad guy. People can be simple, complex, complicated, and convoluted—all at the same time. Sometimes we send a clear input through someone, and because of ego, insecurity, or other unresolved stuff, it comes out the other side as something completely different, leaving them defensive. Now they’re projecting. And now you’re stuck dealing with the fallout. It’s more common than ever in the world we live in today—so let’s break it down. What kinds of tactics can we use to lower the temperature and get back on solid ground? How can we preemptively shield ourselves and make sure the signal doesn’t get lost in the noise? In this episode Brett covers: What projection is and why people resort to it How to frame your words for someone who internalizes everything Go-to scripts and phrases to use when things start heating up Strategically call out dramatic behavior and get to the root of the pattern Setting realistic expectations when someone isn’t ready to face themselves—and you have to choose between being right or being happy 🎤 Art of Coaching Live Events Let’s be honest—most workshops leave you with a notebook full of tips and no real plan for change. Ours are built different. At Art of Coaching, you won’t just sit and take notes. You’ll engage in real scenarios—role-plays, peer feedback, video breakdowns, and live evaluations—designed to help you sharpen your communication, think on your feet, and handle tough conversations with more clarity and control. Whether you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive coworker, trying to be more assertive without burning bridges, stuck in tension at home, or just tired of second-guessing yourself socially or professionally—we can help. This is potent personal and professional development that actually sticks. No fluff. No filler. We offer multiple pricing tiers and discounts—reach out at [email protected] and we’ll help make it work for you. Upcoming Workshops: 📍 Melbourne, AU – Aug 23‑24  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Phoenix, AZ – Oct 11‑12  (Speaker School™) 📍 Murfreesboro, TN – Oct 25‑26  (The Apprenticeship™) 📍 Charlestown, MA – Nov 15‑16  (The Apprenticeship™) 🔗 artofcoaching.com/events Real Coaching for Real Life Let’s be honest—everyone says they want growth, but putting in the work? That’s where most people just stick to what’s comfortable.. That’s why we created a mentoring service built for the real world. Whether you’re stuck on a professional decision, starting a business, writing a book, dealing with pressure at home, or just trying to get out of your own way—we can help. This isn’t therapy. And it’s not a rah-rah, feel-good session either. It’s direct, tailored coaching from people who’ve been in the trenches—leaders, operators, educators, business owners. Our team of 15 comes from a wide range of backgrounds, so you’re matched with someone who understands your world and knows how to push you forward. Everyone needs a coach. We’re here when you’re ready. 🔗 artofcoaching.com/mentoring Related Episodes: E313 | How To Communicate With Someone Who Shuts Down or Stonewalls Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

It can be one of the most frustrating things in the world. That discontent and confusion about your professional life and where it’s headed. The feeling that keeps you up at night, scrolling job postings, revisiting all the “what if’s” from your past, and daydreaming about a complete 180 you’ve always thought about, but never acted on. Staying in this mental space doesn’t just drain your energy, it leaves you lost, confused about your future and what a step forward even looks like. Whether you’re burnt out, fed up with the bureaucracy, or simply craving a new challenge— you need definitive clarity about what you want, along with an honest map of the current landscape so you can make the next right move. This episode will cut through the worry and wishful thinking as Brett lays out: How to identify which passion is worth acting on, even when your head is spinning with options A framework to pressure-test a career move—so you can dip a toe or get your foot in the door without blowing up your life The role of bridge jobs and the realistic steps needed to work your way toward that bigger goal (even if it feels far off right now) Ways to break out of the psychological paralysis that keeps people stuck in neutral How to bucket your tradeoffs so you don’t let fear creep in, remembering nothing is final 🔥 SUMMER SALE IS ENDING SOON! 🔥 Don’t wait. The Art of Coaching Summer Sale is almost over! No matter your learning style, setting, or any other constraints—take the next step and join our AOC family. Visit artofcoaching.com/summersale to lock in: 💻 30% OFF all Online Courses Plus an extra 10% OFF when you bundle Bought In and VALUED 🤝 10% OFF all Live Events This includes The Apprenticeship, Speaker School, Brand Builder, and more. 📱 Art of Coaching Membership Get insider access to: ✅ 20% OFF all courses, live events, and mentoring ✅ FREE entry into our private online community (a $240 annual value) 🎯 Whether you’re a coach, leader, mentor, or someone in transition—there’s never been a better time to invest in your development. Stop waiting, take action! Related Episodes: E376 | Tips If You Feel Stuck at Your Job and Need a Way Forward E242 | Annie Duke: Quit! - The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away Related Resources: VAU(ED) and Blindspot - If you loved this episode and want to dive deeper, both of these courses were designed specifically for this topic.  And they’re still ON SALE (ACT FAST!) Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb

Nothing will haunt you like the things you leave unsaid. It’s a bold statement, and a chilling one—but unfortunately, most of us know exactly how true it is. You owe it to them and to yourself to speak the truth about what they mean to you. No matter the regrettable things you’ve said or done to each other... the failures, the absences, the apologies never given, or the love you didn’t express—it needs to get out. We’ve covered a wide range of topics since launching this podcast, but this one stands out as an evergreen. It’s a conversation that will withstand the test of time and deeply resonate with YOU. In this episode, Brett shoots straight from the heart and will explain: Why we often don’t say what needs to be said—how assumptions, pride, and fear keep olive branches from growing The danger of “safe” silence—and how it can quietly grow into full-blown regret How to make sure you’re not leaving yourself out of the conversation by silencing your own positive affirmations A practical strategy to turn that charged cluster of emotions and thoughts into something meaningful (SPOILER: Just say it messy!) Setting clear expectations and staying grounded in case the message isn’t received the way you hoped 🔥 SUMMER SALE EXTENDED 🔥 Don’t wait. The Art of Coaching Summer Sale is officially extended, but not for long. No matter your learning style, setting, or any other constraints—now is the time to take the next step and join our AOC family. Visit artofcoaching.com/summersale to lock in: 💻 30% OFF all Online Courses Plus an extra 10% OFF when you bundle Bought In and VALUED 🤝 10% OFF all Live Events This includes The Apprenticeship, Speaker School, Brand Builder, and more. 📱 Art of Coaching Membership Get insider access to: ✅ 20% OFF all courses, live events, and mentoring ✅ FREE entry into our private online community (a $240 annual value) 🎯 Whether you’re a coach, leader, mentor, or someone in transition—there’s never been a better time to invest in your development. Stop waiting, take action! Follow Us: Website: ArtofCoaching.com Instagram: @coach_brettb X: @coach_brettb