31. Freddy vs. Jason (2003)

In the Michigan state park system, mosquitos are considered especially heinous.  In the suburbs of Detroit, the Vietnam veterans and recent college graduates who investigate them are part of an elite squad known as The Meteorologists. This is their story.

Your hosts are back for a new year of fun, laughs, and yes, Kevin Williamson jokes.In this episode, Brittany and Hallie review a film that Kevin Williamson and Wes Craven definitely didn't plagiarize even a little bit, sing a Total Eclipse of the Heart duet, and wonder why they didn't just go to film school.

After Brittany and Hallie reviewed both Nightmare on Elm Street 2 and Jason X, there was really only one film left to cover. We started from the bottom and were somehow able to get lower, one might say. Digressions include a rousing game of fuck/marry/kill, Brittany's first family holiday where alcohol was allowed, and having maintenance staff who cosplay as Marilyn Manson on work time.

Hallie and Brittany discuss the worst entry into the Friday the 13th franchise, which is saying something. Digressions include the future of Christianity, the merits of knitwear, and freeganism.

It's Halloween and that means you're entitled to one (or maybe more than one) scare-y movie! Your treat this year is a knock down, drag out, retconned fight to see which versions of Laurie Strode and Michael Myers come out on top. Digressions include the teratoma from Malignant, confusing Adam and Alan Arkin, a field of phalluses in the mold of Kevin Williamson, and declaring all out war on Halloween Kills.

In Sass vs. Evil Dead's first-ever double feature, Hallie and Brittany discuss their cover band plans, how someone can get so ripped eating only rats for nine years, and fail at Canadian accents (sorry, Canada). Brittany furiously defends fruit-flavored Tootsie Rolls. 

Join Hallie and Brittany for a discussion about living your best dark academia life, inappropriate student/teacher relationships, and stereotypes about librarians. Big thanks to vintage Tommy Hilfiger for sponsoring this episode.

In a world where Bruce Wayne becomes a sentient tire on a murderous spree through Joshua Tree, everything is both hella meta and absolutely meaningless...you know, like real life. Digressions include taxidermy squirrels and making really sure you get paid your day rate.

Journey to an alternate universe where Sidney sells merch for Detective Kincaid's emo band, Nick Cave doesn't regret his decision to be a part of this movie, and Hallie gets a PhD in Scream Studies.

Hallie and Brittany mainly talk about the soundtrack of 1979's Tourist Trap which has strong Goosebumps meets Scooby Doo vibes, mannequins, and a villain who desperately needed arts funding at his high school.... but mainly it has a good soundtrack. Hail Pinot Grigio!