EP 67: Pleasure Over Pressure

We're back for another week of So What Now? and this episode? Yeah… it goes there.Carla kicks things off with a life update, sharing Plasm's progress in school, while Dex is on the complete opposite vibe—outside, having a time, and leaning into joy. From there, things take a turn as Carla recounts her experience at a sex club (yes, we had questions), and somehow it opens the door to a bigger conversation: women, pleasure, and owning what feels goodwithout guilt. In honor of Women's Month, we're talking role play, toys, and the importance of actually knowing what you like. But it's not just about pleasure—it's also about the hard stuff. This week's "Woman of the Week" is for the ones who walked away from relationships that weren't toxic… just not right. Because let's be real, those are the hardest to leave. So we had to ask: were you actually happy… or just comfortable? Because those two are not the same. And of course, we get into some wild side conversations—from studies linking lack of sex to weight gain (do what you will with that info), to a surprising confession from Tim Gunn, to the story of a woman falling in love with an AI chatbot. Yeah… it's one of those episodes. Press play and let's talk about it.   CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word.

We're back just like we said we would and honestly? We have some thoughts. This week, we're unpacking a wild (but very real) stat about marriage and how women somehow end up doing more work at home. Like… how did we get here? From there, Dex opens up about her dating life and what it looks like to date with intention think pizza nights, bubble baths, and the question we're all asking: is this real love or just a vibe? Carla taps in with a full recap of Love Is Blind Season 10 (because of course we had to), and let's just say… opinions were formed. Then we get into the ANTM documentary discourse and the internet's hot takes. Are we holding early 2000s reality TV to today's standards a little too hard, or is the criticism valid?   It's giving perspective, a little mess, and a lot of so what now?   CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word.

This week we're catching up… like really catching up. From Disney adventures and parenting wins to healing after cosmetic procedures and navigating dating in 2026, this episode is a mix of honesty, laughs, and a little bit of reflection about where we are in life right now.We talk about the emotional side of cosmetic procedures that people don't always mention, why dating as successful Black women can feel complicated, and what it looks like to want love that feels like peace—not struggle. Plus, we highlight an incredible woman using tech to help families navigate the special education system, break down why women's intuition is actually backed by science, and reflect on the wild reality of being millennials—the generation that remembers life before the internet but is raising kids in a completely digital world. Sometimes life moves fast, things change, and you just have to pause and ask yourself… CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word.

Back for another week of So What Now, and friends… we're in our advice bag. Carla and Dex sit down to answer listener letters that hit close to home—from glow-up guilt and feeling unsupported in your relationship, to the exhaustion of always being the "strong friend," to that quiet but heavy realization of a soft exit when your spirit checks out before your body does. As always, we don't just answer the questions—we bring our own experiences, honesty, and a few side tangents along the way (because life isn't linear and neither are we). If you've been feeling confused, tired, or unsure of your next move, this episode is your reminder that you're not alone—and none of us have it fully figured out. One day at a time, friends  And send Dex some love as she recovers from surgery 💛 We'll see you next week.   What We Get Into Glow-up guilt and navigating growth when your partner isn't supportive Being the "strong friend" and what happens when you're finally tired Soft exits and realizing your spirit has already checked out Personal stories, reflections, and figuring life out in real time   CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word.   Our Sponsors This episode is powered by our partners at Idea to Launch Productions. Looking to level up your podcast or bring your show to life? These are the teams making it happen.   Ready to Start Your Podcast? Let Carla help you launch your podcast in just 30 days. → Take the course now → Book a clarity call and get personal strategy support   Need Advice? Want to Sound Off? Send your questions, hot takes, or real-life mess to: 📧 [email protected] We might read your letter on the next episode—anonymously, of course.

We're back again with another episode a week has passed and somehow a lot happened. Dex has officially entered her white couch era (growth!), Carla shares a voice note from a friend that sparks conversation, and Dex is now claiming her title as a sports girly… to the point where she believes if she doesn't watch the game, her team will lose. Logic? Questionable. Commitment? Real. With tax season right around the corner, Carla gives her annual reminder to stay alert and read your paperwork — because the scams are scamming. We also get into Venus Williams' five-day wedding, the Cam Newton interview with T.D. Jakes on the NXT Chapter podcast, and how T.D.'s words hit Carla with a much deeper message about purpose, presence, and cherishing the life you're living right now. Plus, we debate a wild legal story out of Italy involving a restaurant promo video that allegedly exposed a man's affair. Does he have a case? And would he actually win? A little light, a little deep — just how we like it.   WHAT WE GET INTO Dex's white couch era and what it says about growth A voice note that sparks reflection and conversation Becoming a "sports girly" and superstition logic Tax season is coming — don't get scammed, read your paperwork Venus Williams' five-day wedding Cam Newton x T.D. Jakes on the NXT Chapter podcast Messages about purpose, time, and being present The Italian restaurant promo lawsuit — does he have a case?   CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word.   Our Sponsors This episode is powered by our partners at Idea to Launch Productions. Looking to level up your podcast or bring your show to life? These are the teams making it happen.   Ready to Start Your Podcast? Let Carla help you launch your podcast in just 30 days. → Take the course now → Book a clarity call and get personal strategy support   Need Advice? Want to Sound Off? Send your questions, hot takes, or real-life mess to: 📧 [email protected] We might read your letter on the next episode—anonymously, of course.

Carla and Dex are officially back for the first episode of the new year and there's a lot to catch up on. After a brief stretch of audio-only episodes, the duo is back in the studio and back in their groove.   From holiday bar crawls and questionable screen time habits to life with Debo the cat, Disney adults, and everything that's unfolded behind the scenes, this episode feels like a much-needed reset. No heavy agenda, just real-life updates, laughs, and that familiar "okay… so what now?" energy.   Hit play, settle in, and welcome back — we missed you.   CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word.   Our Sponsors This episode is powered by our partners at Idea to Launch Productions. Looking to level up your podcast or bring your show to life? These are the teams making it happen.   Ready to Start Your Podcast? Let Carla help you launch your podcast in just 30 days. → Take the course now → Book a clarity call and get personal strategy support   Need Advice? Want to Sound Off? Send your questions, hot takes, or real-life mess to: 📧 [email protected] We might read your letter on the next episode—anonymously, of course.

It's holiday break, and Carla and Dex are closing out the year by looking back at the moments that mattered most. This week, they're counting down the biggest highlights of the year—and the So What Now? episodes you, our friends at home, couldn't stop listening to. From unforgettable conversations to moments that had y'all texting the group chat, this episode is a celebration of what resonated, what sparked discussion, and what made this year of the show special. So sit back, relax, and see if your favorite episode—or moment—made the cut.

The Christmas chaos is officially here , and Carla and Dex are back to process all of it. This week, they're hitting rewind on 2025—the highs, the flops, the moments that had us hopeful… and the ones that had us questioning everything. Who really had the best year? Who struggled the most? And what did 2025 teach us about money, culture, work, and survival? Then, it's eyes forward to 2026. With AI continuing to shake up jobs, creativity, and everyday life—and the economy feeling more unpredictable than ever—Carla and Dex talk through what's shifting, what's concerning, and how people can mentally prepare for what's next. It's honest, and a tad chaotic!

In this episode, Carla  shares her personal journey of self-discovery and the importance of embracing life's adventures, especially during the holiday season. She reflects on her recent trip to Denver, the significance of making memories with friends, and the lessons learned about living in the moment. Carla also discusses the challenges of motherhood, emphasizing the need for grace and presence over material gifts. The episode concludes with a deep dive into the biblical story of the Prodigal Son, exploring themes of grace, restoration, and the importance of returning to oneself.   TAKEAWAYS: Embrace life's adventures without waiting for the perfect moment. Your presence is more valuable to your children than material gifts. You don't need permission to change your life. Grace is more important than comparison or resentment. Start your journey of self-discovery whenever you feel ready. Memories with friends and family are what truly matter. Joy can be found in simple, inexpensive experiences. It's okay to feel lost; returning to yourself is a journey. Motherhood requires grace and understanding, both for yourself and your children. You can always return to your purpose, no matter how far you've strayed. CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word. Our Sponsors This episode is powered by our partners at Idea to Launch Productions. Looking to level up your podcast or bring your show to life? These are the teams making it happen. Ready to Start Your Podcast? Let Carla help you launch your podcast in just 30 days. → Take the course now → Book a clarity call and get personal strategy support Need Advice? Want to Sound Off? Send your questions, hot takes, or real-life mess to: 📧 [email protected] We might read your letter on the next episode—anonymously, of course.  

It's officially Christmas season, y'all Mariah Carey is defrosted, the Elf on the Shelf is stressing parents out, and Carla + Dex are back on the couch, hootin' and hollerin' about everything from holiday nostalgia to the realities of six-figure dating. This week, the girls dive into viral stats about women, money, marriage, and whether peace > partnership in 2025. Carla breaks down the wild Samson & Delilah story during Bible Tea: The Most High Edition complete with betrayal, bad decisions, and holy haircuts gone wrong. They also get into: -The Tinder Swindler's tacky comeback - Churches rolling out AI Jesus (???!) -Why women who earn more choose stress-free solitude -Holiday traditions, Black Santa, ornaments & all the Christmas chaos If you like real conversation, messy stories, spiritual drama, and women being hilariously honest, this episode is IT.   CONNECT WITH US ON SOCIAL MEDIA: CARLA WILMARIS | DEX 📱INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thesowhatnowpodcast/ 📱TIKTOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesowhatnowpod 🎙ADVERTISE WITH US: https://www.sowhatnowpod.com/   Rate, Review & Follow UsIf you laughed, felt seen, or screamed "same," take 30 seconds to rate and review the show. ⭐ Scroll to the bottom of our Apple Podcasts page ⭐ Tap to rate 5 stars ⭐ Hit "Write a Review" and tell us what you loved most Your support keeps this going—and we read every word.   Our Sponsors This episode is powered by our partners at Idea to Launch Productions. Looking to level up your podcast or bring your show to life? These are the teams making it happen.   Ready to Start Your Podcast? Let Carla help you launch your podcast in just 30 days. → Take the course now → Book a clarity call and get personal strategy support   Need Advice? Want to Sound Off? Send your questions, hot takes, or real-life mess to: 📧 [email protected] We might read your letter on the next episode—anonymously, of course.