Episode 11: Aging in Ropes - Part I

In this episode, Saara sits down with Freya Hellesdim to talk rope-life balance: how you keep a rope practice alive alongside kids, work, and everything else that competes for your time. They get into parenting and kink, protecting your energy, and what it really takes to stay devoted to rope through the busy seasons of life. Honest, warm, and full of hard-won perspective.

Focusing on the rope scene, we dive into how fashion shows up in unexpected ways—from tying styles, rope materials, and colour choices to photography aesthetics, teaching approaches, and even how people communicate and share knowledge. What influences these trends? How do they evolve over time? And what does it mean to follow—or resist—them? Join us for a thoughtful discussion on how fashion shapes not just what we wear, but how we create, connect, and express ourselves.

What do we really mean when we talk about “fashion”? In this episode, we go far beyond clothing to explore fashion as a broader concept—one that includes trends in behaviour, communication, aesthetics, and creative expression. Starting with the familiar idea of style in dress, the conversation expands into a more abstract space: what is considered “in fashion” at a given moment, and how does that apply across different communities and practices?

This is the second part of Embodiment where we continue the conversation of what it really means to live inside a body — and how that relationship shapes everything we do in rope. We dig into the connection between body and mind: how they communicate, how they sometimes work against each other, and what it actually takes to arrive in your body rather than just occupy it.  

In this episode, we explore what it really means to live inside a body — and how that relationship shapes everything we do in rope. We dig into the connection between body and mind: how they communicate, how they sometimes work against each other, and what it actually takes to arrive in your body rather than just occupy it. We trace how our relationship to embodiment shifts over time — through experience, through trauma, through practice — and how rope can be both a doorway into the body and, sometimes, a way of bypassing it.

Part II moves deeper into the nuances of rope relationships: the difference between chemistry in the rope space and compatibility in everyday life, how to hold intense connection without forcing it into something it can’t be, and what happens when partners grow at different speeds.

In this Episode we unpack jealousy, boundaries, agreements, and why depth often matters more than novelty. This episode explores what makes relationships sustainable in rope.

In this part of the Episode the conversation also touches on the changing aesthetics and culture of kink spaces, the calming and nuanced draw of rope practice over time, and how kink can move from being an all-consuming external exploration to an integrated, quieter part of everyday life. While wonder and intensity may fade, a core, ageless self remains—carrying continuity through decades of change.

In this episode, the hosts reflect on how their relationship to kink and rope has evolved over time, tracing their journeys from their first encounters to where they are now. Through personal stories, they explore how age, life stages, and experience shape desire, practice, and identity.

This is Part II of Anna Noctuelle's conversation with Gestalta, owner of Daruma Berlin.  They talk about the early days, what the scene is now, how performance practice helps focussing and honing personality and skill and many many more topics. Join them for a cosy talk where they discuss everything and anything. Please find here the website of Gestalta: https://gestalta.co.uk Of Daruma: https://www.daruma.berlin And Anna's website: https://www.anna-noctuelle.com For comments and questions you can contact the Podcast on: t.me/modelbehaviourpodcast and [email protected]