Dr. Julie Merriman | Are We Gonna Have Sex or What? Reclaiming Desire After 50

What does it mean when a woman in her fifties says her life force has just leaked out?

In this episode of The Dr. K Show, Dr. K sits down with Dr. Julie Merriman, a licensed professional counselor supervisor, yoga therapist, and university professor whose new book carries a title that turns heads: Are We Gonna Have Sex or What? Dr. Merriman has watched her clients age alongside her over the years, and around fifty she started hearing the same thing over and over from the women in her practice: something felt gone, and they assumed they were broken. Her research pointed her toward the nervous system, and toward a pattern she believes gets missed in most conversations about hormones and menopause: a woman can be on hormone replacement and still not feel desire come back online if her body has spent thirty years bracing for the next item on the to-do list.

They talk about why so many women hit fifty with a nervous system that has been running on fight or flight for decades, why hormone replacement alone often is not the full answer, and why Dr. Merriman believes an earth shattering orgasm might be one of the best resets available for a body that has forgotten how to soften. She also shares how she and her husband have kept their own forty-year marriage playful, and why respect, communication, and a little novelty matter as much as anything that happens in the bedroom. If you have ever felt like you have been carrying everyone else's needs for so long that you forgot where your own body finds pleasure, this conversation is for you.

Key Takeaways:

0:00 Introduction 
0:27 The story behind "Are We Gonna Have Sex or What?" 
0:59 Why the women in her practice felt their life force draining 
6:59 Thirty years in fight or flight, and why the nervous system goes numb by fifty 
15:02 Unlearning that heavy emotions were never okay to feel 
19:26 Why hormone replacement alone does not bring desire back online 
24:11 Sex as the best reset for a dysregulated nervous system 
29:32 Respect, communication and keeping a forty-year marriage alive 

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Resources:

Are We Gonna Have Sex or What? - https://www.amazon.com/Are-Gonna-Have-Sex-What-ebook/dp/B0GHZCYSKZ 
Sexy After 50 (Dr. Julie Merriman's podcast) - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sexy-after-50-improve-sex-intimacy-by-healing-your/id1865726696

Medical Disclaimer: This content is for educational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or replace professional medical advice. Always consult your physician or qualified healthcare provider regarding any medical condition or treatment decisions.