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One year on the second night of Rosh Hashanah, my son turned to me and said, "These simanim , the special foods we eat on Rosh Hashanah, are horrible! "Don't we want to have a good year, a happy year? So why are we eating this terrible stuff????" "Moshe," I said, "you have to understand – we're eating these things in order to destroy our enemies!" "So let our enemies eat this!!!!" he protested. "Moshe," I explained, "the enemy is us. We're eating these foods to destroy the enemy within ourselves." When we pray on Rosh Hashanah for the demise of our enemies, we're not referring only to Hamas, Hezbollah, and their ilk. We're referring also to ourselves, to the bad habits and negative impulses that are so often our worst and most destructive foes. The Hovot Ha'levavot , in the Sha'ar Ha'bitahon section, teaches that there are three stages in the performance of any good deed: 1) the thought, or the inspiration, to perform the deed; 2) the decision to act upon that inspiration; 3) the actual execution. There is a critical distinction, the Hovot Ha'levavot writes, between the first two stages and the third stage. The first two stages are entirely up to us. Hashem does not help us with this. It is up to us to want to do the right thing, and it is up to us to make the firm decision to follow up on this desire. Once we've taken these first two steps, then – and only then!!! – Hashem comes to help us perform the mitzvah , or to make the change in our lifestyle. We have to get the process started by deciding we want to do the right thing – and then we earn Hashem's help to actually do it. The first of these three steps is pretty easy. We're all good people. We all sincerely want to do the right thing, to observe the mitzvot , to speak the right way, to be good spouses, parents, children and friends, to be the best version of ourselves. We all have the right values and the right idea of how we are supposed to live. The problem that we have – the "enemy" that we face within ourselves – is in regard to the second step. It is so hard to make the firm the decision to change, to tell ourselves: "I am going to do this no matter what. Nothing will stand in my way. Nothing is stopping me. I am resolute, and I am determined, and I am going to make this change." And the reason why this is so hard is that we like the wrong things we do. People find it hard to stop speaking lashon ha'ra because they enjoy the thrill of gossip. People find it hard to close their businesses on Shabbat because they enjoy that income. People find it hard to avoid anger because they enjoy the feeling of power that they experience when they scream at people. People find it hard to put down their phones and stop wasting time because they enjoy wasting time on their phones. People find it hard to go to shul in the morning because they enjoy sleeping in. Everyone has some bad habit that they can't kick because they just enjoy it too much. This enjoyment is the "enemy" that we are trying to fight during this time of year. We need to remember that we are strong enough to fight this enemy. We have the power to overcome these challenges. As we head into Rosh Hashanah and the Aseret Yemeh Teshuvah (Ten Days of Repentance), let us commit to wage this battle, to make the firm decision to change, and we will then earn Hashem's assistance in making these changes and living our best lives.
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