Episode 248: Surrendered Sexuality | Juli Slattery

We don’t just follow a biblical sexuality We surrender our sexuality. What does that mean? Today we have Authentic Intimacy co-founder, author, and psychologist, Juli Slattery, back on the show to help us understand the difference as well as:  What do we do if we feel stuck in our broken sexuality and shame? How do we love people who want to fight us? How do you invite someone into bringing their full selves to Jesus? What if we don’t want to do this ministry work anymore? | Highlights | “Most Christians have a saving knowledge of Christ, but they don’t have an ongoing intimacy with Jesus that changes anything.” “The idea of offering your body to God when you have been sexually traumatized is terrifying. It could be helpful to remember that although God has every right to pull rank, He never does that. He is always inviting. He gives, and He invites.” “When I wake up and my job every day is to engage in sexual issues, I have no energy for that. Honestly. I don’t like it. When I wake up and I see that my calling is to engage people on the spiritual issues that sexually often represent, boy do I get energized.” | Next Steps | Join us in GR in November.  Join HIMH Live!  Get Juli's book here. Check out Juli's site here. Hear our convo on her pod here. Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. Follow Laurie on IG here.    

You aren’t making it easy for us today! Today, Laurie and Matt take YOUR questions including: + How should we navigate attraction—when it’s not to toward our spouses? (Single people, there is is stuff in this one for you especially when we speak generally about friendship/intimacy in friendships) + Is it hard to be married to someone who experiences same-sex attractions? + How do you protect your kids from violence while keeping them informed? + How did we talk with our kids about the shooting at Annunciation by someone identifying as transgender, and how did we talk with our kids about Charlie Kirk? (We recorded this before the funeral, FYI.) + How should we engage someone who attends our church and cross-dresses?   Find Out More: • The Nov 7-8 Raising Kids Event here.   • The Jan 31 HIMH Live Podcast Event Info coming soon!! • Preorder the Kriegs’ book here.  • Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. • Ask Laurie a Q on IG here. 

Many of us know that we were not made to be alone, but what if we don’t have good friends?  What if we don’t have friends who we can rely on in not just the good times but the hard?   Today, ministry leader, speaker, and author Toni Collier is back to help us understand why we need godly community and how to get it as well as: What if I feel too disappointed in God to even talk to him as my friend? What if I don’t access my emotions well enough to share with others? What if I’m an introvert?   Find Out More: • Get Toni’s book here.   • Check out her site here.  • Watch the last episode with Toni here. • Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. • Ask Laurie a Q on IG here.  

It’s hard to meet a parent of young kids today who isn’t desperately wondering how to equip their kids for this sexually broken world.   Thankfully, God is calling people to resource parents to equip their kids with a gospel vision for human sexuality, including a massive parenting discipleship project.   It is called Christian Sexuality: Raising Kids, and you can hear the behind-the-scenes details with friend, author, and theologian Dr. Preston Sprinkle today on the podcast!   Next Steps: • Preorder the series here. • Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. • Laurie’s IG here. • Watch here.      

Burnout. Maybe you’ve experienced it—or maybe you’re in it right now and can’t quite name it yet. All we see is: 1 . Emotional exhaustion 2. Autopilot living or cynicism 3. Loss of fulfillment Yup. That’s burnout. How can we heal from it? How does it affect our relationship with God? And how can we move forward with hope?   | Next Steps |  • Forbes article (with a quiz) here. • Psychology Today article here. • The app Steve mentioned here. • Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. • Connect with Laurie here.  

It’s our season wrap episode, and we could not have asked for a better guest. Ruth is a teacher and author, and she knows the real-life challenges of helping kids to and parents to turn their hearts toward God. How can we practice something like family devotions without it feeling too forced? What if husbands and wives are on different pages about how to lead the family spiritually? Is structure helpful or hurtful? Let’s dive in. | Next Steps | Ruth’s site here. Her IG here.  This book here. Her new book here. Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. Sign up to get on the HIMH email list here. 

THIS EPISODE. We literally cried. All of us. And it led to a mentoring relationship between Matt and our guest, Michael John Cusick. Why? We were struck thinking about how to *actually live* in that tension between our faith and our experience. Join us? Next Steps:  Michael’s site here. His book here. Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. Follow Laurie on IG (where she is the most active) here.

As ministry leaders and therapists (Matt and Laurie), we have often wondered: When do church leaders and pastors utilize therapists and para-church ministries and when do they care on their own? Do pastors always outsource? Do they never outsource? What role does the church have for families in crisis? Let’s talk about it with author and psychologist (and lover of the Church), Jennifer Ripley. | Highlights | “The church…will bring you casseroles, but when a crisis shows up, we often don’t know what to do.” “Pastors have a role in a person’s life that a therapist or medical doctor does not have.” “A Church community can provide healing in ways that others cannot. I can provide that somewhat as a therapist…but a whole community that holds people and gives them opportunities for growth? That’s beautiful.” | QOTW | What was your favorite children’s book while growing up? | Next Steps | Her book here. Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. Follow Laurie on IG (where she is the most active) here. Sign up to get on the email list here.

If the average age of pornography exposure is between 8 and 12 years old, and the majority of Christians are looking at it regularly, we need to talk about it.    Specifically, documentary creator and author John Michael Bout helps us ask and answer:   How can we help our kids prepare to see it? How can we help them recover? What hope do we have?   | Highlights |   “Parents are often like, ‘We live in a technological world. I know there is pornography out there. I have no idea what to do!” We can throw our hands in the air, and bury our heads in the sand. I always want to say to parents, ‘Yeah, this is hard. This is challenging. We live in a unique time. But God has given you everything you need to talk about sexuality.” “At the heart of every situation where there is pornography going on, there are good and holy desires. They are finding their end in a counterfeit—in the wrong thing.” “There are good studies to show that the first person to teach on the topic will become the expert. As a parent, you want to be the expert when it comes to questions of sexuality.”   | QOTW |   What is something you have purchased off a cookie ad or As Seen on TV and it was actually good?    | Next Steps | The trailer here. The site here. Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. Follow Laurie on IG (where she is the most active) here. Sign up to get on the email list here.

It’s so easy to identify as “I am what I do” or “I am how I feel.” The next generations especially seem to feel this pull. How can we help Gen Z and Alpha understand who they are in Christ? How can we start with our own identity so we speak from a place of firm-footing instead of hypocrisy? Author and therapist Jonathan Holmes is here to help lead us. | Highlights | “A gospel identity is one that is received and not achieved.” —Jonathan Holmes “All of us parents can struggle with wanting to make our kids into our image, rather than helping them fulfill and live into their image-bearing capacity.” “God’s first words about sexuality are ones of invitation not prohibition.” —Jonathan Holmes | QOTW| If you had the time and the desire, what sport would you want to get really good at? | Next Steps | His IG here. His book here. Join the HIMH Pod FB group here. Sign up to get on the email list here.