#426 - Writing Sid, UNESCO Accents and Condemned to a Life of Seeing Clearly

We join our heroes during a telling off session, because someone is being a naughty boy. Has John eaten too much chocolate on the way in and he’s about to experience the mother of all choco crashes? Has Elis insisted that we scrap the proposed running order to talk instead about every conceivable permutation of the Nations League? Or could Producer Dave be the one in the firing line…?After the air has been cleared, it’s pumped full of excitement. Elis receives quite possibly the greatest bit of post to leave Postman Dave’s sack since its creation, and John relishes the prospect of ball-by-ball cricket commentary.There’s muscle chat, zoo chat, and a tiny bit of (sorry) worlde chat.You too can get involved with the Elis and John ‘No One Else is Doing This’ podcast. Email [email protected], or WhatsApp the show on 07974 293 022.

Acceptance is the word on everybody’s lips today, but it has different meanings for Elis and John. For John it’s a meaningful form of accepting things as they are in life. For Elis it’s about accepting that his wife Isy will never be interested in the Nations League. Both are valid, I'm sure you'll agree.Also getting in on the acceptance game is this week’s special guest, Harriet Kemsley, fresh from her appearance on Last One Laughing. Her form of acceptance centres around dating, and together everyone questions whether Harriet should really be hosting a dating podcast…Elsewhere, there’s a humdinger of a Cymru Connection (complete with surprise connections left, right and centre) and John tallies up the wins and losses in the second instalment of John Wins Again.If you want to get in on all the acceptance fun, get in touch via email: [email protected], or WhatsApp: 07974 293 022.

Elis and Producer Dave are fresh from taking breaths of the night DJ’ing. The only two people on planet Earth to become hipper as they age. But Mixmag has it that Elis spent most of it seated. Because that’s what the top DJs do. Harris, Tong, Guetta, all from a seated position whilst sucking on Werther’s Originals.Yes Elis got a little bit tired bless him and John simply isn't willing to let him forget it. Elsewhere there’s 7 minutes of observational stand up which is hot to go to the nimblest comic, and just when you thought guff chat had tooted its last parp there’s a hall of famer piece of correspondence.And if you root around there’s also some lovely Mallett stuff and two big daddy Mad Dads amidst some top drawer listener generated content.To get in touch with your own gold standard contributions then get it to [email protected] or WhatsApp it on 07974 293 022 if you like your messaging a little fruitier.

John’s managed to pick himself up after last Friday’s show. Well to a certain degree at least - thank the lord. But the collective vibe scale is nudged handsomely towards ‘winning’ as Elis has had one of his all time great days. Cycling? Check. Wales? Check. All time hero who laughs at every single one of his jokes? Check.So it’s all the fun of the fair today. The topics of ‘banning pranks’, ‘the greatest accents of the world’ and ‘how to pad out an autobiography” float around the apple bobbing content tub, ready for the boys to sink their teeth into.And while you’re here, check out the Bureau de Change of the Mind bonus episodes in the feed. Last time out there were some real surprise thrills. That’s only on BBC Sounds.Have you got a UNESCO accent or know someone who does? Well voice note it to us on 07974 293 022 on WhatsApp, or add it to an email (however that’s done) to [email protected].

We’ve hit a low ebb. The show which won Best Entertainment Podcast at the British Podcast Awards just a few years ago is dredging the bottom of the barrel. That new low being production staff researching their credit scores ‘live’ on the show. Throw in a chat with an expert on credit ratings and it’s a wall to wall credit ball.And at such an ebb one would have thought it would lift the mood of Robins. This is him. Distilled Robins. But no. Rather, it’s broken him, because Dave has a 999 credit score without even having a credit card. Something which he simply cannot recover from. And this has affected the mood.What ensues is a breakdown. A breakdown over being unable to nudge the needle from 999 to 1000. And a breakdown over autofilling card details on a laptop. And that’s not the end of it as we see the dangers of a John with access to a credit expert on demand. Somebody break glass for a kilo of Dairy Milk to save us for the Tuesday episode record.Do you have something thrilling to add to this enthralling credit chat? The chances are remote but it’s [email protected] or 07974 293 022 on WhatsApp if you want to subject the production staff to some light reading.

Huge news in Elis and John towers today, for Producer Dave bumped into the man, the myth, the Solero supper himself, Mr Tim Davie. Could he use this opportunity to pitch a brand new true crime podcast about dupes from Stockport who get sold fake shoes? Well that commission’s ripe for the taking if there’s a Magnum that goes the other way.Alongside yet more DG discussion Elis really thinks he should get into juggling, for some inexplicable reason, and we have a game which makes the greatest use of a beat since the invention of the bass drum. To get in touch with the boys send anything you’ve got to [email protected] or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022.

The sun is shining, blossom is blooming and death and divorce are on the lips. Oh the joys of spring. For how is John going to bid farewell when he and his wheels go off to the great scrapheap in the sky? And how does the statistical likelihood of marriage breakup impact the need to draw cold hard financial lines in the sand? It’s all cheery stuff but amidst all that joy Elis has to bring the tone down by documenting one of his great weeks in North Macedonia with the venerable Eggy. (Think ‘scenes’, ‘limbs’ and ‘Matthew The Pharmacist’). Plus there’s a great bath-based Mad Dad to soak yourself in and John wants to get a credit expert on the show. ‘Which other comedy podcasts are doing that?’ I hear you ask. None. Precisely none. Do you want to turn on the faucets of content? Well fill up our big bubbly bath of listener input via [email protected] and 07974 293 022 on WhatsApp.

Palin, Chalmers, Livingstone… Robins(?!). Yes, gliding into the show today is one of Britain’s greatest travellers. An adventurer unequalled in the 21st century. Because John has been on his once per 9 months short haul trip. Naples has experienced Robins, and he it. With such pizza consumption and the undoubted oscillation between ‘hungry’ and ‘full’, Elis struggles to believe that he can actually have been a laugh there.But filled with more pies than than all the ninja turtles combined, Robins has a pep in his step for what proves to be a Billy Belter of a show. The boys dig into the practicalities of 007 if he flew Ryanair and there’s a classic double whammy of a Shame.Plus, there’s something new bursting through the pipes. No it’s not potable tap water or natural gas, but something far more important to John’s existence: wins.Want to drop us a line? Well [email protected] and 07974 293 022 on WhatsApp are the media of choice.

Tech problems aplenty behind the scenes, but none of you will notice until the boys bring immediate attention to it. No matter though because the mood is high, for John has not yet had his two squares of chocolate.And there’s a lot flying about today. Adrian gets intense about the length of forests and some of the finest fancy dress in the region abounds.Plus Elis has been on a historical coffee tour of London and it’s time for the final instalment of This Is Your Stand Up Life, where we uncover a camp alter ego. Ooooo.Want to get in touch? Ooo I bet you do! What are you like?! Well your correspondence twins are [email protected] and 07974 293 022 on WhatsApp.

You join today’s show mid-crash. Mid-comedown. John Robins is 30 minutes post-butterscotch. How is he meant to broadcast at the top of his game on such a slippery downhill blood sugar slide? Do Elis and Dave need to have an intervention to get him back on the straight and narrow?Amidst such a rut however there’s time to dig into offering business advice to local restaurants, and a Made Up Game which sees the tawdry line tested. Plus Elis now has old hands, and The Beaker People rear their neolithic heads once more.Are you a Beaker person getting to get to grips with flint and email? Well get in touch with us on [email protected] or on WhatsApp via 07974 293 022.