Addicted to Control

We pick the book club back up with Part II (“Looking Within”) of The Spirit-Filled Life by Dr. Charles Stanley. Tatum recaps the biblical foundation of the Holy Spirit’s indwelling (for all believers at salvation) versus His influencing (our moment-by-moment leading). Building on the recent Internal Harmony series, she explains that walking by the Spirit is not distant, rule-based “directions,” but a close, personal leading—a lifestyle of sensitivity, dependence, and cooperation. You’ll learn why the Spirit’s primary goal is to form Christ-likeness, how to fight the “battle before the battle” in your mind, and why Scripture is the Holy Spirit’s weapon of choice (the sword of the Spirit) for dismantling lies, speculations, and flesh-driven desires. Tatum shares practical examples from entrepreneurship and life, showing how obedience positions us to avoid unnecessary suffering and walk into God’s wise, timely provision. Grab your copy: https://amzn.to/4mSGGTNKey TakeawaysIndwelt & Led: All believers receive the Holy Spirit at salvation; the ongoing call is to be led by Him (Gal. 5:16, 18, 25).Rhythm > Routine: Don’t confine God to a devotional “director’s chair.” Cultivate a moment-by-moment rhythm with Him.Holiness is the Goal: The Spirit’s primary work is Christ-likeness, not quick answers about jobs, money, or moves.Battle Before the Battle: Win the mental war first—guard thoughts, take them captive, and preoccupy your mind with truth.Scripture = Sword: Use specific verses to confront specific lies; memorize and speak them out loud.Focus Forms Direction: “What we focus on, we drift toward.” Set your mind on the Spirit to avoid fulfilling the flesh.Scripture ReferencesGalatians 5:16, 18, 25 — Walk/keep in step with the SpiritEphesians 5:18 — Filled with the Spirit1 Corinthians 12:13 — One Spirit, one body1 John 4:13 — Assurance by His SpiritRomans 6:11–14 — Dead to sin, alive to GodRomans 12:2 — Renew your mindColossians 3:2 — Set your mind on things abovePhilippians 4:8 — Think on what is true2 Corinthians 10:5 — Take thoughts captive1 Peter 1:13; 3:9; 4:19 — Sober-minded, repay evil with blessing, entrust to a faithful CreatorEphesians 6:17 — The word as the sword of the SpiritPractical Homework List Your Speculations & Struggles: Recurring daydreams, fantasies, mental loops.Find Targeted Verses: Use a study Bible/concordance to match each area with Scripture.Memorize & Speak Aloud: Put verses on cards, phone lock screen, mirror, or desk. Say them out loud daily.Accountability: Share your list with a trusted friend and review weekly.Pray for Sensitivity: Ask the Holy Spirit to flag thoughts not in harmony with truth.Grab your copy: https://amzn.to/4mSGGTNOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this final episode of the Internal Harmony Series, we’re tackling the “big C word” — control. Control isn’t just a personality trait; it’s a spiritual stronghold that keeps us bound, quenches the Spirit, and robs us of God’s peace.In this episode, I share a recent testimony about what happened when I surrendered control, unpack why the Bible calls us to release it, and walk through case studies of the Rich Young Ruler and Paul to show the difference between clinging to control and living surrendered.You’ll learn:Why control is a stronghold and how it quenches the Spirit (1 Thessalonians 5:19)How control shows up as a cognitive distortionThe root issue of trust and how to rebuild itA practical Weekly Surrender Challenge to live this outThis episode will equip you to exchange control for surrender and experience the internal harmony God desires for you.Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this powerful conclusion to the Internal Harmony Series, Tatum shares what it's looked like to live in true peace while managing law school, motherhood, business, and ministry. Through personal testimony and Spirit-led insight, she unpacks the third psychological barrier to inner peace: emotional suppression.Tatum explains how suppression—pushing down emotions like sadness, joy, fear, or anger—creates distance between us and the Holy Spirit, damages our bodies, and leads to emotional isolation. Drawing from biblical truth, she highlights how Jesus and David modeled emotional embodiment, reminding listeners that emotional honesty is not weakness—it’s worship.This episode is a call to stop striving and start surrendering. You’ll walk away with biblical study tools, a mantra (“We don’t suppress, we submit”), and simple, life-changing practices that foster rhythm, not routine. Inside this episode:The difference between disembodiment and suppressionHow suppression affects your business and leadershipReal-life strategies for walking in internal harmonyBiblical case studies from Psalms + the life of JesusEncouragement for Black women & high-achieving Christian entrepreneursScripture focus includes John 11:35, Luke 22:44, Psalm 6, Psalm 51, and more.Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this special episode of Blessed + Bossed Up, I’m sharing an episode from one of my favorite shows — the Prescription for Purpose Podcast hosted by my friend, Dr. Sharla Walker. This message, Is It Ambition or Anxiety That’s Driving You?, fits perfectly with our Internal Harmony series and will challenge you to evaluate the true motivation behind your hustle.Dr. Sharla breaks down the difference between holy ambition — God-given zeal rooted in peace, identity, and purpose — versus anxious ambition fueled by pressure, fear, and the need to prove yourself. Using biblical examples like Saul, Martha, and Nehemiah, she unpacks how to discern your drive, pace yourself with God, and protect your assignment from distraction.Whether you’re in business, ministry, or simply navigating life, this episode will give you practical tools to align your ambition with God’s will — so you’re moving in purpose, not just in motion.Tune in now and make sure you subscribe to The Prescription for Purpose Podcast so you never miss an episode that will keep you rooted in faith, focused on purpose, and equipped to thrive in every area of life.Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this week’s episode of Blessed + Bossed Up, we continue our Internal Harmony Series with Part 2 — unpacking the psychological factor of disembodiment. This is when we operate from our heads while ignoring our body’s signals, emotions, and even the Holy Spirit’s nudges. It’s been one of my biggest personal battles, and I’m sharing both biblical truth and practical tools to help you recognize and overcome it.You’ll learn:Key TakeawaysWhy harmony is more sustainable than balance in life and businessThe difference between external harmony (systems, productivity) and internal harmony (peace, alignment, presence)How disembodiment looks in daily life: ignoring hunger, pushing through pain, numbing emotions, and being physically present but mentally absentHow it shows up in business: over-functioning, leading from performance instead of presence, disconnected identity, and neglecting Spirit-led decision makingRoot causes backed by research — including trauma, perfectionism, performance-based childhoods, church culture, and over-reliance on logicGenerational breakdown of how Gen X, Millennials, and Gen Z experience disembodiment differentlyWhat the Bible shows us about embodiment through the life of Jesus: feeling emotions (John 11:35), resting even in storms (Mark 4:38), and being present enough to sense spiritual exchange (Luke 8:45–46) Practical Steps to Reconnect:Address the root cause — through therapy, prayer, fasting, and surrender to GodBody scans — regularly pause to check in with how you feel physically and emotionallySchedule pauses & stillness — add intentional breaks to slow down and be presentInvolve your support system — ask heart questions, not just head questions, and invite accountabilityReplace old habits — build patterns that align with your identity in Christ instead of survival modeIf you’ve ever felt productive on the outside but disconnected on the inside, this episode will help you:-Recognize the signs of disembodiment- Identify your personal root causes-Begin practical and spiritual steps toward true embodiment that honors God, fosters peace, and strengthens your leadership in life and businessOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this powerful episode of Blessed and Bossed Up, we continue our Book Club series on The Spirit-Filled Life by Charles Stanley, diving into Part 2: Looking Within. Tatum unpacks Chapter 6, "The Faith Factor," where the focus shifts from understanding the Holy Spirit to practically living a Spirit-filled life. Drawing from her own transitional season—navigating motherhood and preparing for law school—Tatum shares how she’s applying this book’s wisdom in real-time.This episode explores the difference between reacting and responding, how to stop intellectualizing your faith, and why focus is the bridge between anxiety and peace. Tatum breaks down three biblical truths that can become daily affirmations rooted in scripture:The Holy Spirit indwells you,He is the life of Christ in you,He is willing and able to produce Christ's character through you.She encourages listeners to shift their focus from self-help affirmations to Holy Spirit-led declarations and offers strategies like building God's track record, preemptive morning declarations, and journaling answered prayers. Using the story of David and Goliath, she outlines how to activate faith before willpower, reminding us that walking in the Spirit is about surrender, focus, and confidence in God's promises.Whether you're facing daily stressors, emotional overwhelm, or spiritual stagnation, this episode gives you the tools to live a Spirit-filled life—not just on Sundays, but every single day.Prayer to Start Your Day in Victory:Lord, I claim the victory right now over the giant of [insert your giant here]. I recognize that this giant is coming up against the Christ in me. Just as you defeated this giant when you walked on this earth, you can defeat it through me now—for you are my life. I trust you to produce peace and self-control through me. I cannot handle what is to come, but you can. Respond through me. When the pressure comes, remind me that the battle is yours. Amen.Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this powerful kickoff to the Internal Harmony Series, Tatum invites high-achieving Christian women into a much-needed conversation about the hidden chaos beneath our productivity: cognitive overload. As a mom of three, business owner, and soon-to-be law student, Tatum shares vulnerably about the transition she's navigating and how God is leading her into a new understanding of internal harmony over external balance. This episode breaks down the psychological and spiritual toll of cognitive overload—what happens when our prefrontal cortex is overstimulated, and we lose our ability to hear the voice of God clearly, regulate our emotions, or even recognize how we feel.Tatum introduces the concept of internal vs. external harmony, showing that while routines and logistics matter, true peace comes from spiritual alignment, emotional presence, and abiding in Christ. She offers biblically-rooted, science-backed tools to help you slow down, re-engage your senses, and practice stillness so you can reconnect with God and yourself.Whether you're a woman juggling multiple roles or simply longing for more peace and clarity, this episode offers a holistic path forward. Expect to walk away with practical steps—like mindful breathing, meditating on scripture, nature walks, grounding exercises, sleep routines, journaling prompts, and fasting from information overload—to combat mental fatigue and restore harmony from the inside out.Plus, Tatum opens up about meditating on Galatians 2:20 and why high-performing women often turn to productivity over presence. Don’t miss this deep, transparent, and transformational conversation on the path to peace through God’s presence.Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this powerful episode of the Blessed + Bossed Up podcast, we return to our book club pick, The Spirit-Filled Life by Dr. Charles Stanley. Tatum shares how this book, one of her top three faith-based reads, is personally guiding her through a season of transition—navigating life with a new baby, two businesses, marriage, and preparing to return to school. She unpacks Chapter 3’s key revelations on surrender, highlighting Dr. Stanley’s honest reflections on secret sin, burnout in ministry, and the life-changing realization that fruitfulness doesn’t come from striving—but abiding.Tatum draws a striking parallel between Charles Stanley’s breakthrough and her own need to resist self-sufficiency and embrace the Holy Spirit’s power. Through practical takeaways—like meditating on Galatians 2:20, creating margin for God’s presence, and allowing grace to reset your internal pace—this episode offers a refreshing invitation to stop doing and start depending. Whether you’re in ministry, motherhood, business, or all three, this episode will help you reposition your heart, reclaim your peace, and surrender control so the Spirit can bear fruit through you.Resources Mentioned:Book: The Spirit-Filled Life by Charles Stanley – https://a.co/d/9kGb5fBKey Scripture: Galatians 2:20, John 15:1-5, Romans 8:9-10, Colossians 3:4Key Takeaways:The Christian life is not about producing fruit—it's about abiding so the Spirit can bear fruit through you.The dangers of spiritual compartmentalization—when the Spirit is active in ministry but absent in private life.Strategies for reconnecting with the Holy Spirit when life gets overwhelming.Why busyness and blessings can still be distractions from intimacy with God.How Charles Stanley’s surrender moment unlocked continuous victory and how you can apply the same posture of prayer.Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this powerful episode of Blessed + Bossed Up, Tatum dives deep into Acts 17:22–31 and pulls out two key strategies every Kingdom entrepreneur needs: cultural intelligence (CQ) and contextualizing your message.Using Paul’s sermon to the intellectual elite in Athens as the foundation, this episode breaks down how Paul studied the culture, respected his audience, and delivered the Gospel in a way that resonated deeply—all without compromising the truth.Tatum explains how these same strategies apply to business today, from adjusting your brand messaging based on audience psychographics to adapting your offers and content for different platforms or markets. She also shares practical examples (from YouVersion to McDonald’s global menus) and offers 3 concrete ways to start applying these principles in your own brand—whether you’re already in business or preparing to launch.If you’re a faith-led entrepreneur looking to improve your marketing, messaging, or audience engagement while staying true to the Word, this episode is your blueprint.📖 Scripture:Acts 17:22–31 (NLT) Paul contextualizes the gospel for the Athenians at the Areopagus, modeling how to reach new audiences with truth and strategy.Key Takeaways:Cultural Intelligence (CQ) is the ability to understand the values, behaviors, and worldview of the people you're called to serve.Contextualization is delivering your message in a way that’s relevant, understandable, and compelling—without changing the truth.Paul didn’t compromise; he customized the way he shared truth to meet people where they were.Business owners must do the same with their brand messaging, sales strategies, and offers. 3 Ways to Apply This in Your Business:Use Your Audience’s Language – Mirror the words your audience uses to describe their problems and desires.Tailor Messaging for Each Platform – Adapt your content for Instagram vs. TikTok vs. LinkedIn vs. YouTube.Adapt Your Offers for Specific Audiences – Adjust your product packaging, pricing, or delivery to match the needs of different segments within your niche.Our Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In today’s deeply personal episode, Tatum steps away from her usual teaching to share a raw and unfiltered story from her recent postpartum journey. After believing she heard clearly from God that she would have a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean), Tatum walks us through the heartbreak, confusion, and emotional toll of experiencing an outcome that looked very different from what she believed God promised.This episode isn’t tied up in a bow. It’s a real-time reflection on what it means to be holy and human—to love God deeply, but also feel hurt, to trust Him fully, and still ask “Why?”If you've ever:Felt sure you heard from God but the result didn’t match,Struggled with disappointment while trying to remain faithful,Wrestled with postpartum emotions, trauma, or spiritual confusion,Needed language for navigating your feelings while staying close to God...This episode is for you.Tatum reminds us that even in our confusion, God is still near, and we can give Him our broken hearts to heal—even before the revelation comes.Key Takeaways:How to process disappointment with God without pulling away from HimWhy your feelings are valid and don’t disqualify your faithThe enemy’s strategy to use spiritual vulnerability for warfareHow to stay committed even when you don’t have clarityThe beauty of surrendering your heart before the “aha moment” comesScriptures Mentioned:Job 13:15 – “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.”Psalm 34:18 – “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted…”Isaiah 55:8–9 – “My thoughts are not your thoughts…”Proverbs 3:5 – “Trust in the Lord with all your heart…”John 11 (Martha & Lazarus – the tension of faith and grief) Share This Episode With:A woman navigating postpartum emotions or birth traumaAnyone who feels disappointed by God or let down by an outcomeA friend who needs a reminder that God can handle her questions and still be trustedOur Sponsors:* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com* Check out Indeed: https://indeed.com/BLESSEDSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/blessed-bossed-up7264/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy