Deeper Dialogues #1 // Shadow work & Tantra - How to not get addicted to peak experiences? Sjors Boelaars & Isabell Froe

How your trauma isn’t a problem to be solved, but your accesspiont to your particular way of loving the world. A poetry infused exploration of two therapist diving into the beauty and limitations of trauma work. Topics in this interview: What is trauma therapy in general & Somatic Experiencing in particular? How to embrace your trauma, and not get lost in an addiction to fix it. How do the current crisises of the world (ecological, political, social) signal a deep unresolved stack of trauma, and how to heal this from the core (spoiler: it’s by trauma work) How accessing grief is a curcial step in processing collective and individual trauma How to create rituals for grief, and how this actually impacts the collective state of the world (yep, it’s all connected) About Daniel Rosenberg Daniel has pursued an unconventional education by immersing himself in the natural world, spending thousands of hours wandering through wild landscapes. He views trauma healing as a necessary step towards exploring the deeper levels of the self, rather than an end in itself. He draws inspiration from Bill Plotkin's Soulcraft™ practices and is committed to guiding modern folks back to soul. In addition to the SE™ training, Daniel has also been trained in dreamwork as well as deep imagination work and utilizes these modalities to help folks connect with Self. With personal experience that includes spending 40 days in solitary ceremony in the wilderness, enacting multiple solo wilderness fasts, and living off the land with only basic equipment in the jungle, Daniel seeks to apprentice himself to all that is wild, authentic, and free. He believes in the potential of Somatic Experiencing® to help people rediscover their human birthright of wild authenticity. To work with Daniel in therapeutic context (also online): https://wildsoulcounseling.com For his writings, see: https://danielrosenberg.substack.com About Sjors Boelaars In my work as a coach and therapist I guide conscious leaders to deepen their sex, emotions, purpose and relationships. See here for more info about my signature 1:1 Program 'Deeper'. I hold a master in Philosophy and am a certified 'Feeding your Demons' therapist (by Lama Tsultrim Allione). I combine modern tantric methods (based on Osho as though by Centre for Tantra in Amsterdam) with classical linneage practices (mainly Kaula Trika linneague) as thought by my main teacher Hareesh Christopher Wallis. More info about me and my work: ⁠www.sjorsboelaars.nl⁠ Insta: ⁠@sjorsboelaars⁠

In this episode we discover the multifaceted spiritual journey of an experienced teacher who will always be a scholar. An inspiringly optimistic soul despite his comprehensive awareness of darkness and chaos. We discuss his journey becoming the one giving spiritual direction through many years of practice, study, formation, and ascetical discipline as well as his callings on disparate steps on his way. We dive deeper into the differences and similarities between Indian, Tibetan and the Catholic Christian disciplines where we discover the fullness of authenticity of contemporary practice with nuanced cultural context of ancient practice. A deeply motivational acquaintance. “If I didn’t take the radical leap, then I probably wouldn’t make it all the way. I felt that strongly from early adolescence. I felt this drive. If I don’t really discipline myself and don’t really make sacrifices and push myself, I’m not gonna get there” - Father Brendan Ellis Williams, CMR About Father Brendan Ellis Williams, CMR Father Brendan Ellis Williams, CMR is a priest, monastic, yogī, spiritual director, writer, artisan, scholar and teacher of religion, Eastern and Western esoteric traditions, meditation and contemplative spirituality: chanting old rebel tales; tracing back song-streams of ancient wisdom; ferrying souls on the mythic riverways of human transformation; guiding folk from all walks of life back to their birthright of wholeness and freedom in unitive awareness. The central aim of his work, in all its iterations, is to help restore individuals and communities to wholeness: to facilitate a felt experience of reciprocal blessing and conscious interbeing in the great family of Nature, toward the one most needful end of the liberative awakening of all sentient beings. If you are seeking real depth and transformation in this life, It’s his honor and calling to share this knowledge with you. Read more and get in touch with him through his website: www.brendanelliswilliams.com And Father Brendan shares beautiful musings on Instagram. @brendan.ellis.williams About Sjors Boelaars In my work as a coach and therapist I guide conscious leaders to deepen their sex, emotions, purpose and relationships. See here for more info about my signature 1:1 Program 'Deeper'. I hold a master in Philosophy and am a certified 'Feeding your Demons' therapist (by Lama Tsultrim Allione). I combine modern tantric methods (based on Osho as though by Centre for Tantra in Amsterdam) with classical linneage practices (mainly Kaula Trika linneague) as thought by my main teacher Hareesh Christopher Wallis. More info about me and my work: www.sjorsboelaars.nl Insta: @sjorsboelaars

Tibbe is een van de centrale mannen van De Bosbeweging, een school waar je kunt ervaren hoe het is om op een primitieve, inheemse manier te leven.  Tibbe is door en door een bos man. Hij woont met zijn vrouw en dochter in een yurt in de achterhoek, en onderzoekt hoe hij door een simpel leven dicht bij de natuur voller in contact kan staan met dat wat waardevol voor hem is. Een van de dingen die ik van Tibbe geleerd heb is hoe ik echt in verbinding kan zijn met de natuur, ver weg in de wildernis, maar vooral gewoon hier in Nederland. In dit gesprek hebben we het over zijn pad. Vragen die aan bod komen: Wat is een vision quest en wat heb je er aan? Wat brengt hem dat precies? Leven in het bos met niets dan een pannetje en een mes?  Waarom is er tegenwoordig zoveel vraag naar programma's waar mensen zich kunnen herverbinden met de natuur? Waarom is zijn in de natuur zo’n geschikte plek voor schaduw werk (answer: je komt jezelf, en elkaar tegen) Hoe begin ik hiermee? Op een meer bewuste, vertraagde manier in de natuur zijn?  Tibbe en ik geven 5 - 9 juli ‘De Kracht van de Schaduw’ een 5 daagse deepdive in jezelf met daarin een mini quest (1 nacht alleen in het bos). Wat zijn je schaduwkanten en wat is je rol in de tribe? Wat heb jij van het bos te leren? Welke kanten vind je lastig te accepteren in jezelf?  Over Sjors BoelaarsIn my work as a coach and therapist I guide conscious leaders to deepen their sex, emotions, purpose and relationships. See here for more info about my signature 1:1 Program 'Deeper'. I hold a master in Philosophy and am a certified 'Feeding your Demons' therapist (by Lama Tsultrim Allione). I combine modern tantric methods (based on Osho as though by Centre for Tantra in Amsterdam) with classical linneage practices (mainly Kaula Trika linneague) as thought by my main teacher Hareesh Christopher Wallis. More info about me and my work: ⁠www.sjorsboelaars.nl⁠ Insta: ⁠@sjorsboelaars⁠ “In de natuur zijn is thuiskomen voor me. Alle complexiteit valt van me af en even ben ik in heel direct contact met het leven om me heen.Het leven wordt even heel simpel: we zoeken een plek om te slapen, maken vuur, zorgen dat er te eten is. In deze simpliciteit krijgt het leven de kans zich in haar volle schoonheid te laten zien.” — SJORS Over Tibbe Zie De Bosbeweging #naturequest  #visionquest #nativewisdom #bushcraft  #soulcraft  

In this deep and powerful conversation with Lama Rigdzin Yudron we discuss the benefits and potential pitfalls on the path of meditation. How is it possible that so many people meditate, but we don't process process the all dark stuff? In her 30 years of Buddhist practice she has encountered many of the pitfalls you will encounter when you engage a meditation practice. Lama Rigdzin is a resident lama (priest) at the Tibetan Buddhist monestary Dag Shang Kaygu in the Spanish Pyrenees. She went through a rigorous ten year meditation training in Nepal to become a lama. Her experience includes an individual meditation retreat of 3 years, 3 months and 3 days, in which, for the record, she did not sleep. Questions covered in this interview: What are the benefits and pitfalls on the path of meditation? How to meditate? What phases are there? When am I ready for more advanced practices? What is the role of a teacher on the spiritual path, and how does that stabilize your practice? How is it possible that so many people meditate, but still after decades are struggling with the same things? (answer: spiritual bypassing) How to not get crazy along the way? “Meditation is not about trying to feel better” -- Lama Rigdzin About Lama Rigdzin Lama Rigdzin got on the spiritual path by accident. She and her newly wed husband didn't know where to go and ended up in India. There she met an Indian sage, a holy man, who asked her the question: are you really happy? This question rattled her bones and got her on the path of searching for true liberation. 30 years of dedicated Buddhist practice later she is now one of the resident lama's Tibetan Buddhist monestary Dag Shang Kaygu in the Spanish Pyrenees. She went through a rigorous ten year meditation training in Nepal to become a lama. If you have any questions about your meditation practice, you can contact lama Rigdzin here. About Sjors Boelaars In my work as a coach and therapist I guide conscious leaders to deepen their sex, emotions, purpose and relationships. See here for more info about my signature ⁠1:1 Program 'Deeper⁠'.  I hold a master in Philosophy and am a certified 'Feeding your Demons' therapist (by Lama Tsultrim Allione). I combine modern tantric methods (based on Osho as though by ⁠Centre for Tantra in Amsterdam⁠) with classical linneage practices (mainly Kaula Trika linneague) as thought by my main teacher ⁠Hareesh Christopher Wallis⁠.  More info about me and my work: ⁠www.sjorsboelaars.nl⁠ Insta: ⁠@sjorsboelaars⁠ Feeding your Demons Both Lama Rigdzin and me, Sjors, are certified Feeding your Demons counsellors. Feeding your demons is a shadow work practice in which you invite a part that is in pain (like a part of yourself that is afraid, angry, jealous etc) to explain what it really needs. Feeding your Demons combines ancient buddhist wisdom with contemporay western psychotherapy (Gestalt Therapy). We both give Feeding your Demons sessions, if you are curious, please reach out.

By: Sjors Boelaars   Everybody has his or her obstacles blocking direct access you your essence. For some it's fear, anger, resentment, sadness, for others it's a sense of elevation or feeling superior. All these elements can be blocking your ability to live your full radiant loving essence into the world.  The core of the 'Feeding your Demons' practice (and of tantric shadow work in general) is that we don't repress or deny these obstacles, but we use their energy for transformation. How? By not pushing away these parts of ourselves but inviting them to show their underlying need.  The core of ‘Feeding your Demons’ is that you don’t repress your dark sides, but invite them to unveil what they actually need. ‘We invite them for tea’, so to say.” — SJORS BOELAARS   What is Feeding your Demons?  In Feeding your Demons an ancient tantric method called Chöd is combined with the modern psychotherapeutic method of Gestalt therapy. The practice is devised by my teacher Lama Tsultrim Allione.  In the visualisation you will be invited to dialogue with subconscious parts of your psyche to learn what wisdom they carry and what they need for healing. You will investigate where the pain is held in your body, what the pain needs, and you will get access to the underlying wisdom.  NOTE: please don't do this visualisation without proper in person guidance if you easily disassociate (disconnect from the body)  About Sjors Boelaars Sjors is the founder of Tara Academy (www.tara.academy) and a certified Feeding your Demons therapist by Lama Tsultrim Allione. One of Sjors' specialisms is Shadow Work, which aims to transform reconnect us with the parts of our psyche that we sometimes are not proud of (eg. our anger, lust, fear).

Mindful masturbation. Jep, it's a thing.  In this practice you will learn maybe one of the most difficult things in life: going to the edge of an orgasm without giving in (for men that would mean ejaculation). But... why would you? Ejaculation and orgasm is the best part right? Well... it is and it isn't.  By training our body to be able to hover on the edge of orgasm without sliding into release two things happen: We disconnect having sex with the need to orgasm. This will result in less goal oriented love making and with that in more presence (and jep, with presence comes connection)  We expand the orgasmic capacity of our WHOLE body, instead of just the genital area. For who? This practice was originally recorded for men but it works beautifully for women too.  Enjoy! Sjors

Hey friends, Here is a live recording from the inner flute breathing.  Why you want to do this practice: In this practice you learn how to build up (sexual) energy in the base and spread it throughout your body. In this way you can transform the raw energy of the base into the more refined energy of the upper parts of the body. And also nice: you can spread the nice sensations of the genital area all the way throughout your body. Activating the orgasmic capacity of the whole body. Not a bad thing. How to do the 'Inner flute' breathing: Breathe in and out through the mouth Breathe in as if through a straw On the in breath, feel or visualise energy flowing into you body via your perineum Let the energy fill up the pelvic floor and the low belly Draw the energy up towards the heart and maybe higher to the crown On the out breath let the energy flow down and out of the perineum Optional extras to stimulate the energy flow: Rock your pelvis and arch your back on the in breath, let go on the out breath Close mula bandha (pelvic floor muscle) on the in breath, let go on the out breath Eye lock: When the energy passes between your eyebrows (third eye) look inwardly towards your third eye to push the energy up further Use your hands to guide the energy up and down Best practices: You can do this practice laying down or sitting up. This whole exercise thrives on the subtle balance of relaxation and engagement. Experiment and balance your natural tendancy. When you see you are working very hard, try to relax and don't do so much for a little while. When you feel you are drifting away, see if you can wake up your system with some fuller breaths. This practice works beautifully with gentle self pleasuring and massage.

Deeper Dialogues // Shadow work & Tantra - How to not get addicted to peak experiences? I like the spiritual path. I like the tantric path. I like to see how my body opens up and how I am able to experience life more fully. But over the years I see more and more pitfalls that come with spiritual practice. I do things that feel good, but how do I know they render structural, real life improvement of my day to day life quality? I see myself getting attached to peak experiences (in a sexual and in a spiritual sense). I see how my growing capacity for deep meditation get's highjacked by the ego to feel myself just a little bit better than the 'normal' people. For me, this is where why Shadow Work is so important in any spiritual practice, because it prevents me falling into these traps. In this conversation I talk with tantrica and men's empowerment coach Isabell Froe about the beauty and the risks of walking the tantric path.  Questions covered What is Shadow Work? Why is Shadow Work relevant in tantra? Spoiler: it prevents you getting addicted to it's peak experiences. Shadow work & Sexuality: why are we sometime afraid to step into our wilder, more raw side of sexuality? How therapy strengthens spiritual practice, and how spiritual practice stimulates therapy. About Isabell Froe  Isabel is an experienced tantrica and works with men to step into their authentic masculine power. She holds a  MA degree in Indian Studies, completed various Tantra Trainings, studied Yoga Therapy, Ayurveda Medicine & Stress Management and runs workshops & retreats all over the world. Insta: @isabell.froe About Sjors Boelaars In my work as a coach and therapist I guide conscious leaders to deepen their sex, emotions, purpose and relationships. See here for more info about my signature 1:1 Program 'Deeper'.  I hold a master in Philosophy and am a certified 'Feeding your Demons' therapist (by Lama Tsultrim Allione). I combine modern tantric methods (based on Osho as though by Centre for Tantra in Amsterdam) with classical linneage practices (mainly Kaula Trika linneague) as thought by my main teacher Hareesh Christopher Wallis.  More info about me and my work: ⁠www.sjorsboelaars.nl⁠ Insta: ⁠@sjorsboelaars⁠

Būta Śuddhi is one of the central practices in classical tantra. In the practice we recalibrate the 5 elements (earth, water, fire, wind, space). This helps to balance out all excess energy in your system.Teacher: Sjors Boelaarssee for more info: www.tara.academy(recording live workshop: sound quality not optimal)

Begeleide 'Feeding your Demons' visualisatie. By: Sjors Boelaars Iedereen heeft zijn of haar beknellingen. Voor sommige is het angst, woede, verdriet, of juist verheffing of superieuriteit. Soms staan deze beknellingen je in de weg. De kern van de practice 'Feeding your Demons' (en van Tantrisch werk algemeen) is dat je deze beknellingen niet wegdrukt maar uitnodigt om te onderzoeken wat de onderliggende behoefte is. “The core of ‘Feeding your Demons’ is that you don’t repress your dark sides, but invite them to unveil what they actually need. ‘We invite them for tea’, so to say.” — SJORS BOELAARS What is 'Feeding your Demons'? Feeding your Demons is een buddhistisch tantrische methode ontwikkeld bij onze leraar Lama Tsultrim Allione. Door visualisatie ga je in gesprek, (letterlijk, je stelt vragen en krijgt antwoorden) met delen van je psyche die normaal in het onderbewustzijn verkeren. Je onderzoekt wat deze delen met pijn nodig hebben, en je krijgt toegang tot de achterliggende wijsheid. Let op: doe deze visualisatie niet zonder begeleiding als je weet dat je makkelijk uit je lichaam treedt of dissocieert. Dit is een live opname uit een van onze online workshops.   Over Sjors: Sjors is de oprichter van Tara Academy (www.tara.academy) een platform voor tantrische practice, breathwork en meditatie.  Een van Sjors' specialismen is 'schaduw werk', het onderzoeken en aan het licht brengen van delen van ons zijn die we normaal gesproken verborgen proberen te houden (denk aan schaamte, woede, angst, pijn etc). Hij is gecertificeert Feeding your Demons therapeut door Lama Tsultrim Allione. Voor vragen of opmerkingen: contact [email protected]