#42 Heal Your Trauma & Change Your Reality By Doing This, A Conversation With My Therapist, Wendy

I used to tell people that my biggest fear was waking up at the age 40 and realizing that I hadn't been living life for myself. That I'd somehow been chasing the wrong things, living in everybody's opinions at work and disconnected from my own desires. We get so stressed out at work trying to be the most for everybody. I don't think we take enough time to be "selfish" and just connect to ourselves. I've come up with a new format on here to take a moment and connect to ourselves. It's a work in progress, I already have a few new ideas on what to incorporate next time. I'm very excited, because it feels like I can connect more intimately with you this way. Shoot me a message if you have any topics you'd like me to do a soundbite on to help you feel connected, grounded, reflected and ready to go out and be passionate about life again.  Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

I manifested my move to LA— I thought I'd figured out the energetic space to live from to manifest my purpose & dream career. Reality hit harder than I thought. My confidence took a massive hit. I'm learning that confidence leads to uncertainty, but that's the point. If that's true, how can we trust ourselves and feel confident when we're anxious? How can we slow down and take care of ourselves to see uncertainty as a place of infinite possibility instead of living from a place of fear and scarcity? Key elements I dig into:1. Flexible Mindset: Self-confidence fluctuates. Stay open minded and be compassionate with yourself. 2. Self-Care: Extreme “performance” requires extreme self-care—nutrition, physical, and emotional well-being—they all influence our confidence. 3. Slow Down: Are you leading from a place of ego and need for validation? Confidence stays when we’re mindful, present, and grounded in who we are. 4. Connection: Where are you making decisions from? What’s your intention? Are you trying to impress or are you respecting yourself, your thoughts, your mind? 5. Awareness: Being aware of our emotions, energy levels, and cycles can help us make decisions aligned with our personal flow & rhythm. Chapters: 00:14 The Journey to Confidence and Purpose 00:41 Manifesting a New Life: The Move to LA 02:20 Facing Challenges and Rediscovering Confidence 03:57 Preserving Self-Confidence Amidst Doubt 05:16 Confidence is Dynamic: The day you find it, is the day you’ll lose it. 6:45 We don’t always have the best mindset, and that’s ok 07:03 The Role of Quality Food and People & Confidence 11:04 Connecting to Yourself for Real Confidence 13:07 Slowing Down to Connect and Gain Confidence 16:02 Managing Your Energy and Emotions 23:25 Aligning Work with Nature’s Cycles 25:30 Conclusion Subscribe for more! Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

Feeling stuck or lacking the drive to make this year the best of your life? This is for you: My guest David Ulrich breaks down the secrets to success and staying energized in a world full of uncertainty. David was ranked #1 management guru by Business Week, profiled by Fast Company as one of the world’s top 10 creative people in business, a top 5 coach in Forbes, and is recognized on Thinkers50 as one of the world’s leading business thinkers. Whether you're aiming to skyrocket your career, level up your business, or simply upgrade yourself and your life, we've got your back. From aligning your values with your hustle, accelerating personal growth or growing your business, David's insight will reignite that fire within you! 🔥 It's time to step out of survival mode and thrive!❤️‍🩹✨Key lessons to live your best life, stay energized & find success: In a world full of uncertainty, focus on certainty New age leaders focus less on what they want to say, and more on how they make others feel. Self-actualization in isolation was selfish to begin with.The future is NOT a linear progression from the past: There's no guarantee that your health or income will keep getting better. The mindset for a better future: "When you live in the past you're depressed, when you live in the future you're anxious. The only way to improve is by staying PRESENT by being curious and learning." You learn by leading a life of experimentation. Your business' culture should focus on: "What do we want to be known for by our best customers?"  Chapters: 01:33 Introducing David Ulrich: A Visionary in Leadership 04:00 David Ulrich's Philosophy on Embracing Uncertainty and Learning 05:36 The Power of Failure 10:16 New Age Leadership: Listening & Empowering Others 13:57 We Learn More About Leadership in our Families and Relationships Than From Celebrities. 21:35 Research Shows Trend for Personalization in Leadership25:47 How To Do Work-Life Balance For Real As A CEO 27:03 Balancing Professional Commitments and Personal Values 29:41 Navigating Paradox, e.g. Work vs. Family commitments 31:21 A Spiritual POV on Making Mistakes34:15 How To Embrace & Learn From Failure 37:24 Cultivating a Purpose-Driven Culture 44:31 Personal Reflections and Practices for Growth 48:20 Concluding Thoughts on Leadership and Self-Improvement Subscribe for more! Connect with David: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/daveulrichpro/ The RBL Group (consulting) https://www.rbl.net/about-us/consultants/dave-ulrich Get David's books: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Dave-Ulrich/author/B001K8TGCO?ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

Key lessons on reinvention from our conversation:The worst moment in your life, can also be your best: You can use devastating times to build necessary momentum for change  to create opportunities. Adversity can lead to new paths and self-discovery.Experimentation over comfort: If you never try, you will never know what works for you. The key for high-performers lies in setting realistic expectations,  and embracing self-love unconditionally amid imperfection.Confidence despite fear of failure: Your people-pleasing tendencies push you towards perfectionism and hinder you from trying. True confidence lies in owning your uniqueness, celebrating small wins, turn comparison into motivation, and giving yourself grace when you fail. External validation wasn't sustainable to begin with.Authentic is strong:  Being a successful content creator or a successful model and actor in the competitive market of LA requires standing out. You can't stand out if you're a carbon copy of everyone else and trying to fit in. Dare to be different.Happiness is on the Other Side of Fear of Failure: Facing your fears is like finding the keys to doors that lead you into  rooms you never thought existed. Reframe your relationship to discomfort and your whole life will change.Chapters & Timestamps:04:24 Feeling Lost, Hopeless & Healing 05:07 How To Reinvent Yourself & Choose Your Own Path 08:00 The Problem With Imposter Syndrome & Needing Validation 11:15 Navigating the Challenges of Moving to LA & Starting Over 13:06 People Pleasing Vs. Feeling Confident About Standing Out 15:02 Don't Let Them Put You in A Box: We're Multifaceted Humans! 18:59 Stop Wanting to Be Perfect & Being Somebody Else 21:54 The Key To Success: Finding Comfort in Uncomfortable Situations 23:43 Embracing Imperfection & Self-Acceptance 26:11 Manifesting Good Energy vs. Toxic Positivity 28:00 Trusting Your Intuition 34:21 Your Vulnerability With Friends Mirrors The Relationship to Yourself 34:25 Self-Discovery: Knowing Yourself Gives You Confidence To Stand Out 36:33 Discovering Who You Really Are One Experiment at a Time 39:15 Why Chasing Your Dreams is The Best Move 45:23 Rapid Fire Questions: Do You Tip If It's TO GO coffee? Follow for More! Connect with Jack 🫶🏼Instagram,  TikTok Youtube Snapchat: Jack_Jerry07 Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

10 tips that highlight my key take-aways:Discern between what you want vs what you think you want because of othersWhat’s causing imbalance is disconnecting you from yourselfShame & guilt drain you of energy and focusPerfectionism, another clear indicator for lack of self-worthSelectively use your energy, not everything deserves 150%Where is your self-talk creating imbalance in life?Opinions are like elbows—everyone’s got oneSelf-love is everything related to how you treat yourselfCultivate self-love by getting to know yourself, seeing yourself as the whole human that you are— flaws and all, accepting and forgiving yourself, but still showing up to do the work.Fear of rejection is your gateway to your next levelTimestamps 00:11 The Harsh Reality of My First Night in LA 01:33 Navigating Loneliness and Dating in a New City 02:19 Confronting Job Dissatisfaction and Finding Purpose 04:33 Embracing the Soft Girl Era: Less Hustle, More Intuition 10:36 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Overcoming Perfectionism 18:35 Learning to Slow Down and Embrace Life's Flow 24:07 Finding Balance: Embracing Change and Self-LoveThanks for loving, sharing, and supporting me   Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

Chapters00:39 Drina’s Creative Journey Writing A Children's Book01:18 Overcoming Childhood Traumas through Writing & Creativity02:43 The Struggle with Self-Doubt and Procrastination In Life and During The Creative Process03:14 Reflecting on Childhood Dreams and Aspirations04:11 The Challenge of Acknowledging Success04:58 The Constant Pursuit of Achievement06:05 The Importance of Self-Acknowledgement06:29 Exploring Cultural Heritage and Identity09:56 The Struggle with Acceptance and Self-Expression11:38 The Power of Resilience and Perseverance20:04 The Role of Support and Encouragement25:39 Navigating the Challenges of Hollywood34:49 Future Goals and Aspirations Connect with Drina✨ 🫶🏼Instagram https://www.instagram.com/drinaandre?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA== 🫶🏼Get her children's book "The Prankey Monkey" 📖 : https://www.amazon.com/Pranky-Monkey-Alexandrina-Andre/dp/B0CG7SK21J  Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

Key Insights & Topics Discussed:The interplay between fear-based and strength-based parts in decision-making. And how to uncover YOUR parts!Wendy's powerful tool, rooted in Freudian Theory, to rewire your subconscious minds for success.The transformative process of turning fear-based coping strategies into strength-based ones.Chapters & Timestamps:00:02 Introduction: My Quest for Power, Confidence, and Energy00:09 The Struggle: Feeling Stagnant and Confused01:01 The Turning Point: Meeting Wendy and Discovering her IFS model, rooted in Freudian Theory01:34 Understanding Fear-Based Parts and Their Impact02:54 The Power of Self-Healing and Uncovering Trauma03:26 The Role of Wendy's Tool in Self-Healing03:57 Personal Revelation: Identifying the 'Submit' Part05:05 The Importance of Self-Healing in Daily Life05:41 Taking Control and Creating Your Own Life07:08 Introduction to the Interview with Wendy07:55 Understanding the Concept of Internal Family Systems09:57 Exploring the Strength-Based and Fear-Based Parts in Helena's Life14:45 The Process of Identifying and Understanding 'Submit' Part 39:17 The Role of Self-Healing in Overcoming Limiting Beliefs50:21 Final Thoughts and Conclusion Connect with us:Wendy: Her practice's website , book The Portable Supervisor: The Essential Guide for Students and New Mental Health Professionals Helena:  LinkedIn , Instagram, or my youtube  for more inspiration. Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

5 Key Take-Aways:Team First Philosophy: Tom advocates that the team knows more than the individual, pushing for a collaborative approach to problem-solving and decision-making.Equal Systems for Success: We explore the importance of equal pay, fixed salaries based on experience, and loyalty as a strategy to create a psychologically safe environment and foster team success.Crisis Leadership: We discuss the challenges and benefits of self-organization, why it's crucial to fight for decentralized structures, and we debate the role of leadership in times of crisis.Diversity Beyond Background: Shift the focus from diversity in backgrounds to creating a system that ensures psychological safety, equal opportunities, and rewards structures, promoting a culture of inclusivity.Lessons from History: Gain insights into how historical and political systems, such as those observed by Tom, can inspire leadership and organizational views, shaping the way businesses are structured.Connect with us: Tom on Linkedin , youtube or website Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

Thanks for tuning and thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode. It helps me grow and reach more people like you. -HelenaConnect with me on Linkedin or Instagram, or visit my youtube channel for more inspiring change stories. Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena

Key take aways:Say "I Am" instead “I will be” to step into that "future you energy"More micro-habits reduce decision-fatiguePlanning is great, but useless without understanding your current emotional stateBeing adaptable requires more disciplineTopics Discussed:Embrace the Power of "I Am": Act as if you have already achieved your goals, embody the energy and confidence of your future self. This mental shift can significantly impact your actions and outcomes.Micro Habits for Success: Establish routines, especially in the morning, to create a structured foundation for your day. Limiting the number of daily decisions allows you to focus on priorities and higher-level thinking.Reflection and Goal Planning:  Identify recurring challenges and limiting beliefs. Plan for the future by setting clear goals, both personally and professionally, and create a roadmap for success.Prioritize Health and Well-being: Recognize the foundational importance of health in reaching your goals. Prioritize habits that contribute to well-being, including adequate sleep, nutrition, exercise, and mindfulness. Adaptability and Discipline: Acknowledge the need for adaptability. While external factors, such as having children, may introduce unpredictability, maintaining discipline and having anchor points in your routine allows for flexibility without sacrificing progress toward your goals.Thanks for tuning and thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode. It helps me grow and reach more people like you. -Helena Connect with us:Philipp on youtube or linkedin And me, Helena, on Linkedin or Instagram, or visit my youtube channel for more inspiring change stories. Follow me for content on healing, growth, and transformation to unleash your authentic self and find your purpose ✨ 🫶🏼TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helena.unapologetic🫶🏼Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/helena_unapologetic/ 🫶🏼LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helena-arjuna-suter-65471740/ 🫶🏼Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcOt6Yo8eFgLQxLGmfQ5qHQ Thank you for sharing, rating and reviewing this episode, it helps us grow and reach more people like you.-Helena